Disclaimer: So, this is my fourth Sound of Music fic and I still don't own the darned thing…sigh.
Author's Note: Sigh, I just couldn't stay away. So here I am, back with another story. I really didn't think I would be writing another one for a while, but I am very happy to say that I am!
Thank you to my wonderful beta TheMarauders3! It's muchly appreciated! So thanks!
Summary: Maria returns from the abbey, but the engagement between the Baroness and the Captain is not broken off and the famous "Gazebo Scene" does not take place. Maria does what she promised, leaves once preparations for someone to take her place are complete. Skip forward four years in the States. Maria as fled the country as well as Georg as the children. A few surprises await both parties. Surprises that complicate the matter at hand and yet make it that much easier.
The first few chapters will take place over the course of weeks, months, and then years. Just a heads up!
Why-
-Chapter One: Why?
What had pressed her, possessed her to do it? Had she really expected their lives to change for her? That everything would just halt, time would stop, and they would be together for all eternity? That he would give up something he already had? Had he even felt the same way? What had she been thinking in the first place? What had she expected? She felt horribly low, and more alone than she ever had before. She let the tears fall, not caring anymore. She was alone, and it didn't matter. No one would see the tears of lost love. No one.
Maria sat in her old room of the von Trapp villa. Everything was exactly like it was when she had left a week ago. The dresses she hadn't taken with her where still sitting nicely in her armoire. The new drapes where hanging lightly, moving lightly with the breeze that came in through the open windows. She walked over to the one that Liesl had climbed through her first night here and looked into the back gardens of villa. Everything was so peaceful. A song bird whistled in the distance. Simple, not complicated, like her life had become.
She remembered looking out the same window a week ago, the Baroness standing right behind her, telling her how she, Maria, was in love with the Captain. She had been terrified at the Baroness' words, trying to make them untrue, but knowing deep, deep down that those words were the truest words ever spoken. Maria had fallen in love with her employer, so she fled. Scared and frightened, a coward.
Now she was back, why? The question came back: What had she expected? He was engaged to Baroness Schraeder! He was spoken for, so to say. And there was nothing Maria could do about it. She didn't even know if the Captain did love (or had loved) her back, but she had somehow let the Reverend Mother's words bewitch her into thinking so. And now look at her! She was calling the Reverend Mother's words bewitching! The thought! It was horrible! What had she come to? The tears fell in waves.
There was a knock on the door, and Maria jumped. She sniffed and wiped her eyes as dry as she could with the back of her hand. "Come in," she called, her voice squeaky and timid, highly unlike herself.
"Fraulein, I just wanted to bring you your things and tell you that dinner wa- Are you alright?" Liesl asked, coming into the room. Maria's carpet bag and guitar case were in her hands.
"I'm fine, darling." Maria replied, acting overly happy.
"Fraulein, have you been crying?"
"Hm, oh no! Of course not! I just had something in my eye, that's all. Probably just a little scratch-" more like a cut in my heart "-I'm perfectly fine." Liesl didn't looked convinced. Maria quickly changed the subject. "Did you say dinner?" Liesl nodded, looking at her governess skeptically. "Wonderful, I'm absolutely starved," Maria finished, feeling five inches tall under Liesl's questioning gaze. Maria couldn't believe the tone of her own voice, so forced.
"Are you sure you're alright, Fraulein Maria?" Liesl asked once again.
"Perfectly. Now, we can't keep everyone else waiting." Maria replied, taking the guitar and carpet bag from Liesl's hands, setting them on the bed, and putting her arm around Liesl, guiding both herself and the young girl out of the room and towards the dining hall.
Maria pushed the food around on her plate. It was delicious, it was delightful…it was horrid. The scrumptious food reminded her of how wonderful it had all been, before her world had turned upside down.
"…And then, then the other man said 'What's the name of his other leg?'!" the table erupted with laughter at Friedrich's joke. Maria gave a small laugh and felt how dry her throat was. She quickly reached for her water glass, and she unconsciously let her eyes find the man sitting across from her. It happened.
The Captain had been looking at her, watching her. Trying to understand why she was acting so unlike herself. The usual cheery, conversation-leading woman was sitting quietly in her chair, hardly touching her food and only putting her two cents in every once in a while. When she looked up their eyes met and time seemed to freeze. Liesl's glass remained frozen to her lips, Kurt's fork was stuck in mid air, Gretl's small smile glued to her face, the Baroness's uneasy posture stood still like a statue, a look of worry etched on her face.
Maria couldn't tear her eyes away. They were glued to the man's she loved deeply. His eyes were warm and questioning, willing her to tell him something. Something she knew could never be revealed, not anymore, at least. Maria felt at ease looking into his eyes. She felt--safe. It was comfortable, and she temporarily forgot what was troubling her. Maria smiled slightly. He smiled back. His smile made something snap in Maria and she looked away.
The table burst back into life.
Captain Georg von Trapp stood on the back balcony, staring into the depths of the lake. The night was light and warm, with a slight breeze. The scent of the trees filled the air. It was soothing. His mind was racing. He couldn't understand a single thought that was going through it. He didn't know why, he didn't understand. Movement below him on the terrace caught his eye.
That was the reason why. She was the reason why. Maria. Seeing her again this afternoon, surrounded by the children. They had all been smiling, except for Her. That sad, confused expression had already been plastered on Her face.
He hadn't seen her since the ball. Just after they had danced. That dance. Georg hadn't known what was happening. He still didn't know what had happened. He hadn't felt that alive in so long. But he knew it had to do with the young vivacious blonde he had danced with. Ever since she had been in the house she had put some sort of magic over it, some kind of spell. Then she had left, suddenly, and that light, happy magic was gone. From the house, and even, (did he dare to say it?) in him. She was life. Intoxicating.
Georg looked down again and saw Maria walking towards the Gazebo. Suddenly he had the urge to know why she had left. He needed to know. He needed to make sure it wasn't something he had done.
He turned around quickly and nearly ran into Elsa as he went back into the house. "Oh! Darling, you scared me!" Elsa exclaimed.
"I'm sorry, Elsa. I wish I could stay and join you. But I have to go talk to Fraulein Maria to find out how long she plans on staying. As you heard earlier, she doesn't plan to stay long."
"Yes, I remember. " Elsa said, looking at the ground. "Well, I just came to say goodnight, anyway, so no harm done. I'm rather tired, after all."
Georg nodded. "Goodnight, Darling." he said, kissing her lightly on the lips and leaving.
"Goodnight." the Baroness said to his retreating form. She didn't retreat to her room right away. Instead she walked further out onto the balcony. She could see the young Maria sitting on the bench by the gazebo. There was a noise below her and seconds later she saw Georg walking quickly, yet apprehensively towards Maria. "Oh, what have I done?" she asked herself, not really knowing what she was referring to.
"Um, hello." Georg said softly, hoping not to startle her. Maria was sitting on the bench by the gazebo in the gardens, lost in thought. She quickly turned her head, looking at him with sad, questioning, and scared eyes. "I thought I just might find you here." he continued, pointing to the spot she sat, not knowing what else to say.
"W-was there something you wanted?" Maria asked, standing.
"Hm? Oh, no, no. Please sit." he said. She did so, and he walked forward. "Uh, may I?" he asked, pointing to the spot next to her. She nodded. It was an uncomfortable silence. They had talked to each other before, but it had never been uncomfortable like this. It was odd. Georg looked over at her. She was looking at her hands. He was suddenly struck with the sight of how beautiful she looked. Truth be told, Georg had always found her to be attractive, deep down though. Those thoughts were ones that an employer never thought of his employee. But now, she just looked stunning. The moonlight made all of her soft features stand out. He became nervous suddenly, due to his thoughts, and laughed. "You know, I was thinking something. Two things actually." he said, talking . He felt the need to break the silence that never accompanied the usually boisterous Maria.
"Yes?" she asked quietly, looking at him.
"Why did you leave, and what was it that made you come back?" he asked, trying not to sound accusing.
Maria felt herself tense. She should have known this was coming, but honestly, did it have to be now? Could she really tell him? No, of course not. That would only be prying into waters that should be left alone. She knew if she told him the real truth she would have to leave, and she didn't want to leave just yet. She couldn't do that to the children.
"Well," she began, surprised at how steady her voice was. "I had an obligation to fulfill and I came back to fulfill it."
"Yes. Is that all?"
"And I missed the children."
Georg nodded. "Yes, of course you would. They really care for you, you know."
Maria smiled, wistfully. "I really care for them too."
Georg nodded, then took a deep breath. "Then why will you be leaving again?" he asked, quietly.
Maria was taken aback. "Well, I won't be needed will I? I'm sure the Baroness will be able to make things fine for you." she said, standing and walking towards the gazebo, crossing her arms as she did so.
"Yes." Was all Georg managed to say. He was surprised to find that the thought of marrying Elsa didn't bring a smile to his face. He didn't want her to leave, but he couldn't argue with the fact she had presented. "You know, the children won't like the fact of you leaving again."
"Yes, I know. And I don't like it either. But I really can't stay. You'll all be a complete family again." she said, weakly. Her last sentence nearly brought tears to her eyes. "Like I said earlier, I'll stay until all arrangements are made."
"Where will you go? Back to the abbey?" he asked, even though he already knew the answer. He stood, and followed her into the gazebo.
Surprisingly she shook her head, and walked to the far end of the gazebo while he stood in the door way. "No, I left the abbey."
Maybe he didn't know the answer. "You left the abbey? For good?"
She nodded.
"Why? You left the night of the ball because you said you missed your life at the abbey too much, and now you're back saying you've left the abbey for good?" His voice was close to sounding accusatory. But it didn't make any sense!
Maria winced at his tone. "I know, it sounds crazy. But yes. Everything you say is true" she said, looking away from him.
He paused, and stared at her back. "Maria." he said, not realizing he didn't address her as Fraulein. She shuttered slightly. "You still didn't answer my question. Why did you leave in the first place?"
Her body shook slightly, she was crying, but she wouldn't face him to let him see the tears. "Please." she replied, masking the sadness in her voice and the tears in her eyes. "It doesn't matter anymore. It really doesn't."
"Yes, it does matter. Did we do something wrong? Were you unhappy?"
Maria laughed slightly, it was almost a cackle at his ironic statement. Was she unhappy? How could he think such a thing? "That's just the thing. That's what was wrong." she said, turning around and looking at him, not caring if he saw her tears. "I was perfectly happy. The happiest I had ever been in my whole life." They locked eyes. "Goodnight, Captain." With that, she brushed past him quickly and went into the house, leaving him quite alone in the gazebo.
Author's Note: Ok, so it may not be the best. But it'll get better I promise! It will. '
Until next time,
Your humble author,
The Lonely Goatherd
Oh, and I purposely left the "?" out of the title. Don't know why…just did.