A/N Kawaii Petal-chan here! Chapter five is here too! Read it! Enjoy it! And review please! (Don't worry, it will pick up in later chapters!)

Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans. Duh.

Chapter Five

School's getting close to done for this year. Even so, I still get beat up a lot by the older boys. And that's just not funny. My mom isn't laughing either. In fact, she's getting really tired of it. She says that next year, she's going to try homeschooling me. It's one of those 'newfangled' computer schools. And I'm going to get a laptop for my schoolwork! That's a bonus. On the down side, it's going to be rough, not seeing any friends at 'school.' Not that I had many friends in the first place, but I won't see them all the same.

I guess, since I'm getting older, I notice things more. Things that I didn't notice before. Like the look on Mom's face when the news talks about some criminal getting the death sentence, or when they mention a lot of the crimes going on in places like Jump City. I guess Mom still worries about Dad sometimes. Maybe she still, deep down, loves him. Like that old adage, "Love the sinner, hate the sin."

I don't really know where I stand on the issue about Dad. There are days when I hate him with every atom of my being. That's usually brought on by seeing the other kids singing and laughing and talking with each other, and realizing that I'm doomed to silence for the rest of my life. That really makes me hate him. However, there are also days when I remember how things used to be, when I was little, and I guess you could say that my heart aches for those days. It's kind of a love-hate relationship.

Grandma says that she doesn't really hate him. She dislikes his actions and wishes that he'd find Jesus, but she doesn't hate him. Grandma says that she's praying for him! Now, sometimes I just don't understand that. I have to say, that lately, I've been hating him a lot more than I ever have. I just don't see how you can love someone that is so bad and even pray for them. It's almost contradictory. You hate them, but you pray for them. What is wrong here? She says that the Bible says to love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you. But how? That doesn't make any sense! Grandma says that it works though, but I'm not sure. It really has me confused

How can you love someone so bad?

How can joy exist in someone so sad?

Contradictions are everywhere around,

Clarity is nowhere to be found.

The world is turning upside down.

Maybe we're all going crazy.

J.W.W.

Ok, what did you think? I'm starting to bring Slade into the picture now! And yes, the whole Slade thing does play a big part in future. And the 'I hate my dad' bit too. Review please! And I'll see you next time!