The Nature of Love

Gijane

Rating: M (sexual/language)

Disclaimer: Nymphadora Tonks, Remus Lupin, and any other of the beloved characters mentioned are from magical world of Harry Potter, which belongs to JK Rowling and Associates. I'm just borrowing them to entertain the fans until Book 7.

Summary: Missing Scene: What happened between the Hospital Scene and the Funeral Scene in Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.

Author's Notes: We'll all recognize the dialogue that is direct text from Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (American edition, pages 624-625). Is it sad that I know the page numbers without having to look them up? Italics are inner thoughts.

Carina is the constellation that contains Canopus, the second brightest star in the skies (after Sirius).

I'm supposed to be focusing on my Epic, but here came another plotbunny hopping in my head. But I had the urge to write smut…

Many thanks to my beta, Godricgal, and Starsea, my mini-beta, for all their help.

"And I've told you a million times that I am too old for you, too poor…too dangerous…"

Nymphadora Tonks went numb. She stumbled blindly away from Remus Lupin until she hit a windowsill. The Four Founders must have known that students would have lots of visitors while in hospital; all the sills were cushioned to serve as extra seats.

Tonks fell onto the sill and turned her back to the rest of the ward, curling up into a ball. She could feel Lupin's eyes on her, but she willed herself not to look at him.

"I've said all along you're taking a ridiculous line on this, Remus." You keep telling him, Molly, but he's not going to listen. He is being ridiculous. Stupid noble man…

"I am not being ridiculous. Tonks deserves somebody young and whole"I don't want another man, she thought desperately. I want you. You're killing me, Remus! Can you not see?

"But she wants you. And after all, Remus, young and whole men do not necessarily remain so." Arthur. Molly must have told him. Well, they are married. Oh God…poor Bill! I'm going on about me and Bill's a mess. I'm such a selfish bitch.

"This is…not the moment to discuss it. Dumbledore is dead…" You don't want to discuss it, fine! That's it I'm finished! We are done!

"Dumbledore would have been happier than anybody to think that there was a little more love in the world." McGonagall. God, did they all know? Probably, she concluded

Tonks sat back up on the windowsill as the Hospital Wing's doors opened. Hagrid came in and told the new Headmistress that he had moved Professor Dumbledore's body; that Professor Sprout had managed to get all the students back to their dormitories; that Professor Flitwick was lying down, but he'd be fine; and that Professor Slughorn had informed the Ministry. McGonagall thanked him and took Harry to her office for a chat and a Heads of House meeting before the Ministry arrived. She saw the perfect opportunity to leave.

"The Minister's on his way, I had better go and meet him." Tonks jumped down from the sill and ran for the door. Of course she tripped over the bedpost of Bill's bed as she passed. Typical.

Lupin immediately moved to catch her. The usual stimulating jolt that always happened whenever they touched passed through both of them. She looked up into his face and drew in a breath of shock at the grief that was etched on it. Grief was replaced by surprise when their eyes met. That's right, you broke me. Are you happy now?

"Thanks," she muttered. She ripped her hand out of his and ran out of the ward feeling everyone's eyes on her. She ran through the corridors, stumbling every now and then due of the tears clouding her vision, tears that were threatening to spill over. Tonks soon heard footsteps behind her and someone call her given name. Lupin, run faster.

She made it to the Entrance Hall. She managed to avoid most of the Gryffindor rubies that had been scattered all over when the hourglass had been destroyed. Inevitably, she tripped over one and went down. Ouch.

"Nymphadora, wait!" Lupin called as she fell. "Are you all right?"

Glancing over her shoulder, Tonks saw him fast approaching. She scrambled to her feet, but wasn't quick enough. He grasped her elbow.

"Let go," she demanded. She tried to shake him off, but he tightened his grip on her. He's stronger than he looks, but you knew that already.

Lupin led her out the front doors of the school and marched her down the path that led to the entrance gates. Halfway down, they met the party from the Ministry.

"Miss Tonks," the Minister for Magic called. "Did you respond to the school?" Rufus Scrimgeour raised a surprised eyebrow at Lupin's presence, but didn't comment.

Tonks and Lupin exchanged glances. "Remus and I were assisting the teachers with a patrol tonight at the request of…" Tonks trailed of as she began to sob. Oh my God, Death Eaters had invaded Hogwarts; Bill had been savaged by Greyback; Dumbledore was dead, murdered by Snape, who turned out to be a traitor; Remus rejected me again.

Lupin's grip on her elbow tightened in reassurance and she managed to calm down. "Bill Weasley was with us," he said. "He was mauled by Greyback, but will survive."

Tonks watched as Bill's brother Percy stiffened in shock. "Will he be a…a…?" he asked Lupin hoarsely, unable to complete his sentence.

"I'm not sure. Greyback wasn't transformed when he attacked Bill," Lupin told Percy. "There might be some contamination, but I don't think he'll be a full werewolf…" His 'unlike me' went unsaid, but everyone understood what he didn't say aloud.

"Your parents and Fleur are with him now, Percy," Tonks said softly. "Why don't you go and see them?"

"I don't think I'd be welcome," Percy whispered.

"Go and see them, Percy," Lupin urged gently. "You would be welcome. You'll always be their son, no matter what."

Tonks watched as Scrimgeour looked Lupin up and down several times, as though reassessing him. Surprise, surprise, Scrimgeour. She, in turn was surprised when the Minister said to Lupin, "Why don't you take Miss Tonks back to her flat tonight, Mr Lupin. Make sure she stays there, otherwise she'll be right back here, if I know her determination," he paused and she began to protest. "You have just fought in a battle where people either died or were seriously injured. You're in shock right now. Take the next few days off. That's an order, Miss Tonks," he added as she began to protest again. "Go." Lupin tightened his grip on her elbow, bowed his head respectfully towards the Minister, and steered her away.

As they exited the school grounds, he readjusted his hold on her. Tonks was now getting angry and began to take it out on him. "Let go of me, Lupin," she demanded. "I'm a big girl. I can walk myself home." He ignored her. "Come on, let me go. I'm a fully trained Auror; I can handle just about anything."

He glanced down at her, but didn't say anything. This made her more irate and she began to make it personal. "Honestly Lupin, I took on Death Eaters tonight, I'm sure I can handle one untransformed werewolf." That got a reaction: his body stiffened, but he still didn't say anything. Hit a nerve, did I? "Oh, wait, according to you, I can't. You're toodangerous for me-"

She stopped talking abruptly at the furious look on his face. "I know you're angry, Nym-"

"My name is Tonks, thank you very much," she hissed at him. It was the first time, in a very long time, that she had corrected him for calling her by given name. They both paused, looking at one another.

"I'm going to Side-Along Apparate you to your flat," he said quietly. They appeared almost instantly at the Apparition Point for her building. "Let's go up. We need to talk." Talk? About what? I am not talking about you rejecting me...again. Just let me get on with my life, please.

Once in her flat, Tonks ignored him and proceeded to strip all her clothes off. Lupin averted his eyes, causing her to comment in acidic tones, "It's not like you've never seen me naked before, Remus." He blushed slightly.

She smirked and then entered the bathroom, surprised when he followed her in a few seconds later. "Going to take a shower with me?" she asked nastily.

He didn't answer, but proceeded to strip his clothes off. Tonks turned the shower on; making sure that it was hot. He doesn't like the water hot.

Lupin climbed in behind her. Reaching over, he wordlessly turned the water cooler. He then took the flannel and soap and began to wash her back gently. Mmmmm…nice. No, no! I'm mad at him! Remember that….mmmmmm. Damnit!

She lolled her head back, resting it against his chest. Taking the flannel from him, she washed her front then turned around to wash his. He silently pivoted so she could wash his back. Great arse… Hey! You're angry with him! Stop it!

He turned round again when she had finished washing. Placing one finger under her chin, he lifted her face so he could see her eyes.

Tonks sucked in a breath at the raw desire that was reflected in his eyes. Lupin bent his head and brushed his lips against hers. No, no, no, no! But she found herself standing on tiptoe to respond.

He kissed her open-mouthed and passionately and she responded greedily. His hands roamed all over her body while hers found his erection and began to stroke it. Lupin moaned into her mouth. Oh…my…God.

Picking her up, he braced her up against the wall and entered her roughly. She wrapped her legs around his torso and pulled him as close as she could. He placed his hands on the wall either side of her head to brace himself. Tonks moaned his name as he set a rapid pace.

It wasn't long until both of them reached climax. Panting, Lupin leaned in to kiss her in post-coital bliss, but she turned her face away. "Dora?" he asked.

"What?" she whispered. "Don't reject me again, and then make love to me a half hour later, Remus. My heart can't take it."

Tonks shifted. He slid out of her. She avoided the look in his eyes by rinsing off in the still running water. She exited the bathroom quickly, wrapped in a dressing gown. By the time Lupin joined her in the bedroom, a towel slung around his hips, she was dressed in a satin tank top and shorts set.

"We just made love and you wouldn't even kiss me afterward," he said. There was a substantially injured tone to his voice. Good, now you know how I feel.

She cocked her head, regarding him in the mirror's refection. Tonks then picked up her hairbrush and began to detangle her hair."That wasn't making love, Remus. Making love requires both parties to be in love with each other. You do not love me; otherwise you would'd stop rejecting my love."

Lupin drew in a sharp breath. "Nymph-"

"My name is Tonks, "she hissed. "You've lost the right to call me Nymphadora." Damn right he has.

Lupin turned and exited the bedroom. Tonks smiled in grim satisfaction, but all the while her heart was breaking. She heard him moving around in the bathroom. She climbed into bed and was shocked a few minutes later when he joined her. What the-?

"Just what do you think you're doing?" Tonks demanded.

He wandlessly relit the bedside candle that she had just blown out. "I said we had to talk, Tonks," he emphasized her surname. "I understand that you are angry at me, you have every right to be. Please, let me finish," he stopped her from interrupting. "Last year was like a fantasy for me. I knew the truth about Sirius, he was innocent and I had him back; I had a warm, dry place and Wolfsbane Potion for my transformations; but most of all, I had you. A woman who loved me for me; a woman who was able to see past the lycanthropy, to see just me, the actual me. I was happy, truly happy. No, I was in love and blissfully in love at that," he paused."Then the Department of Mysteries incident happened. Sirius died, you were injured. It was like I was snapped out of a trance. What was I thinking, allowing myself to be happy and in love? I didn't deserve that. Let me finish," he said again as she tried to interrupt again. "We saw Harry off to the Muggles the day you were released from hospital. Dumbledore came to me that night and asked me to go underground. Hey, what's this?" he asked, brushing away the tear that had leaked from her eyes.

"You do deserve to be loved," she whispered. "You are the sweetest and gentlest man I've ever known."

"You'd think different if you had seen me whilst I was underground, Tonks"

"You did what you had to do in order to survive underground. And my name is Nymphadora," she whispered, interrupting him. She cuddled up to him. He gathered her in his arms. Mmmm…now this is where I belong. "One night a month does not define your character, Remus. There is so much more to you than your lycanthropy. You have to see that."

"I do now," he told her, kissing her forehead. "Ginny showed me that."

"Ginny?"

"Yes! Young Miss Weasley showed me that the most important thing in the world is love. That love is blind to all," he grinned down at her. "You should have seen the look on Molly and Arthur's faces as she lectured me."

Tonks burst out laughing. "I can only imagine!"

"I told her what I've been telling you all along: I'm too old for you-"

"Remus, you just shagged me senseless in the shower."

"I did, didn't I?" he smirked cockily.

"Mmmmm…yes you did. You are not old; older, yes, but not old. Now, you're too poor," she paused. "That's not your fault, it's that bitch's! You made excellent money while you were teaching or tutoring. You can always go back to that after the war. Until then, I do get paid an obscene amount of money for being an Auror."

"I don't want to depend on you," Lupin told her.

"The nature of love is give and take, my darling. I'm giving to you materialistically, but you're giving to me emotionally."

"So are you," he pointed out.

"Yes, but what you give emotionally is worth twice of what I give materialistically. You don't open to everyone, Remus. I'm one of the lucky few." Lupin blushed, knowing that her words were true. "And you have no idea how special that makes me feel."

"I'm…too dangerous," he whispered the last excuse.

"Darling, I'm in danger everyday. I'm an Auror and we're at war. Not to mention that I'm dead clumsy!"

"But I'm a werewolf," Lupin protested. This has to be his most serious issue if he keeps bringing it up.

"I just told you that one night a month does not define you. You take your Potion and lock yourself in the basement. Hush," Tonks said as he made to interrupt. "If anything happened, say you got out or the Potion didn't work, please remember that I have beentrained to handle those kinds of situations."

"But what if I was to hurt you…or our children," he asked. Or our…what!

"Children?" she asked, sitting up. "You haven't even asked me to marry you!" Oh my God! I said the 'M' word! He's going to freak!

"I have to talk to your parents first, Nymphadora. But after I do, I'm going to ask you to marry me."

"You want to marry me?" Tonks asked disbelievingly.

Lupin chuckled and pulled her back into his arms. "Yes, I want to marry you. And, after the war of course, I want to have lots of babies." Oh my God!

"Babies," she echoed.

"Babies…those small smelly things you hear crying at the top of their lungs in Diagon Alley, their mothers push them around in prams." He said it with a straight face, but Tonks could hear the amusement in his voice.

"I know what babies are! Er…how many do you want?"

He shrugged. "At least three." What!

"At least three," she echoed again.

"Probably more."

"Oh!" More than three? Oh dear.

Lupin laughed. "That's a nice shade of pink your hair is now."

Tonks looked up at him. "My hair's pink?"

"Yes, it is. Such a pretty shade too." He kissed her pink spikes. "Do you know when it was that I realised I was in love with you?" he asked.

"No, but do tell," she said excitedly.

"Sirius and I were in the drawing room one night. The sly dog," he paused as she laughed. He was a sly dog. "He asks me nonchalantly, 'So, Moony, what would you say your favourite colour is?' I was busy looking at all the books in their shelves and absentmindedly answered with the first colour that came to my mind, 'Pink.' Sirius let out this loud shout of laughter and yelled, 'I knew it!' By this time I had realized that I had said pink and why. Sirius, meanwhile, was laughing hysterically in his armchair singing, 'Moony loves Tonks.' I nearly hexed him."

Tonks giggled. "Do you know when I realised that I was in love with you?" He smiled down at her. She continued, "Molly and I were in the kitchen one morning, it was really early. She was making hot chocolate, using real chocolate since I had just come from cleaning up the aftermath of a Dementor attack." He hugged her tighter. See, I can handle anything. "So, she hands me the mug and a large chunk of chocolate, telling me its Honeydukes' finest. I look at the bar and said, "It's the same colour as Remus' eyes.' She just smiled knowingly at me. I then realised that I was head over heels."

"I love you, Nymphadora Carina Tonks."

"I would have taken Carina for a given name, but no, my fool of a mother…" He let out a shout of laugher. "Oh! I love you too, Remus John Lupin." Now, shag me senseless again."

"I am yours to command." He brushed her lips gently with his.

She eagerly pressed back. "Is that a promise, my love? I do so love it when the Marauder in you comes out to play."

Chuckling, he ran a hand up and down her spine. Mmmmmm… She moaned at the feeling of his hand the rippling the satin against her skin. "Oh…you are good," she breathed.

"Thank you," he said, right before his tongue licked a nipple through the satin. She couldn't form a coherent thought to respond with.

Lupin shimmied the tank top off of her and returned his attention to her breasts. Tonks rubbed her hands up and down his bare back, holding him close.

He returned to her mouth, kissing her passionately. "I love you, my Dora," he groaned.

"I love you too, my darling." She fingered the waistband of his briefs, and then carefully pulled them down, purposefully brushing against his erection. Tonks smirked at the moan he let out.

It was her turn to moan next as he quickly removed her shorts and he brought his hand to cup her. She cried his name as a finger entered her.

"Oh, fuck," Lupin breathed. "I can't wait. Are you giggling at me?"

"You never swear," she laughed. "Professor, I'm scandalized!"

He glared at her, and then entered her while she was laughing louder at his glare. Her laughs choked off into moans as he began to move.

"Not laughing now, are you?" Lupin breathed into her ear. Tonks shook her head mutely at him. "I didn't think so." He leaned down and kissed her.

Soon, she felt herself loosing control. As she came, she shouted his name. Lupin followed her into pleasure a few minutes later, moaning, "Dora," as he did. He collapsed on her.

Tonks held him close until he went slack inside her. He rolled off her, and then spooned up against her, resting his head against her breasts.

"Dora?" she asked. "I noticed you call me that when we make love."

He flicked a nipple, smiling as it instantaneously hardened. "Nymphadora is too many syllables to manage when you're coming."

Tonks laughed. "Imagine trying to learn how to say it as a child." He chuckled appreciatively. "Hey, what did Ginny say to your excuses, by the way?""She said, 'That's complete bollocks, Professor. Now go and chase after Tonks and beg her forgiveness.' Molly was still fussing over Bill with Fleur and didn't hear her, but Arthur did. He did his best to give her a reproving look but I could tell that he was actually too impressed with what she had said to be bothered with admonishing her! "Tonks laughed. "Ron was impressed too."

"I'm sure he was," she said, rubbing his back suggestively.

"Dora, give me a while to recover!" He nuzzled the side of a breast and moved upward.

"I do like when you call me Dora."

"It's a good compromise, don't you think? I love you, Dora." He fingered a spike. "I'm glad you're pink again."

"I love you too, Remus."

He kissed her lovingly. "Pink really is my favourite colour."

It's mine too.

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FINIS