Harry Potter and Susan Bones: Match made through blackmail

Author's Note: This story is set around the time of the Yule Ball in Book 4. It is based off an episode of MASH Edwina. The gist is that the nurses of the 4077 refuse to meet with the men in the camp unless Nurse Edwina was taken on a date by one of the doctors. The men drew straws and Hawkeye (Captain Pierce) ended up with the short straw. This is a Harry/Susan story with Harry in the same kind of situation as Hawkeye and Susan in the situation of Edwina. Please read and review.

Gryffindor Common Room

Neville rushed into the common room and then headed straight for Harry and Ron.

"Guys, we've got a situation. You know how the Yule Ball is coming up soon?"

"Don't remind us Neville, we can't get dates." Ron said

"Unless something is done soon, no one from our year will have a date." Neville said sitting down.

"What are you talking about Neville?" Harry asked looking up from a book on magical plants.

"I overheard some girls talking in the showers, when I tripped and fell in. They were saying that unless one of the boys asks Susan Bones to the Yule Ball, no one is going to get a date for it."

"They can't do this, its blackmail!" Harry said, jumping up, the book falling open to a page on gillyweed.

"I only know what I heard Harry, is there anyway to find out what they're planning?" Neville asked

"I'll talk to Fred and George; they might have something that can help us. Harry, check the map, see if the girls are gathered in one area." Ron said before leaving to find him brothers.

"What map, what did Ron mean?"

"This is the Marauder's Map. It shows me everyone in Hogwarts at the moment." Harry said when Hermione entered the room and headed over to them.

"Hey Harry, Neville, what are you doing?" She said with a small smirk

"Just showing Neville the Map, why?"

"Just wondering. Do you two have dates yet for the ball?"

"No, not yet. Why?"

"I wanted to be the one to tell you, if no one asks Susan Bones to the ball, everyone is going to be very lonely this Christmas. Have fun boys." Hermione said before leaving

"Neville, get all the fourth year guys together, even the Slytherins. Tell them to meet us in the Library, and bring, the Straws." Harry said as he gave Neville the map to find everyone then left for the Library.

Library, back corner

"Gentlemen we have a situation on our hands. Unless one of us asks Susan Bones to the Yule Ball, no one will have dates for the foreseeable future." Harry spoke up after the rest of the Fourth Year boys gathered in the Library.

"So what are we going to do then, Scarhead?" Draco asked, sneering at the Boy-who-Lived.

"We follow the Sacred Law of the Straws. As you all know, the person with the shortest Straw must find a solution to the problem, in this case asking Susan to the Ball." Ron answered as Neville broke a small piece off of a straw and then grabbed nineteen others before moving to the assembled boys.

Finally only Neville and Harry were left, as Harry moved towards picking a straw he saw Neville close his eyes.

"Guys, congratulations." Harry said showing them the short straw.

"What are you going to do?" Terry Boot asked

"Ernie, do you know where Susan is right now?" Harry asked the Hufflepuff

"I think she just entered the room Harry" Ernie said, pointing towards the door to the Library

"Well, Harry, good luck man." Dean said before Harry walked over to Susan as all of them saluted Harry, even Draco. (Homage to Henry Blake saluting Hawkeye as he went to Edwina's tent)

"Hi Harry, can I help you?" Susan asked, looking up from her Charms homework

"Actually, I wanted to ask you something: Will you go to the Ball with me?" Harry asked

"Did your friends put you up to this? Because if they did, then you should just leave. Or was it the Sacred Law of the Straws?"

"Did you know that the girls are blackmailing us? If I don't take you to the Ball, the rest of them don't get dates for the foreseeable future." Harry said pointing at the cluster of boys watching anxiously watching the conversation, before sitting down and not looking at her.

"So you just did this because you had to? Is that it?" Susan angrily asked him

"Sadly, yes. I do like you, as a friend Susan. I wish it didn't have to be this way, but it is."

"I'm sorry Harry; you were just trying to do what was right. I can't believe that the other girls would do something like this." Susan told him, placing her hand on Harry's arm

"If this hadn't happened, would you have gone to the Ball with me?"

"Yes, I'd still like to, if you'll ask me again." she said before turning back to her homework, hoping for Harry to ask her

"Susan, will you go to the Ball with me?"

"Yes, and thank you for being honest with me Harry." Susan said before giving Harry a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

The Yule Ball

After dinner was finished the four champions were called to start the Ball. As Harry led Susan onto the dance floor he noticed again how beautiful she looked in a forest green dress, complimenting Harry's emerald green robes. As they danced, Harry noticed Neville dancing with Ginny and Parvati storming away from Ron, who was watching Hermione dance with Anthony Goldstein.

"Do you want anything to drink?" Harry asked as he followed his date towards a table where Ernie and Su Li, a Ravenclaw, were sitting with Terry Boot and Padma.

"Some punch sounds good, does anyone else want some?" Susan asked their tablemates

"Ernie, get me a glass, please?" Su Li asked her date, and then Padma and Ginny, who had just sat down with Neville, wanted a glass as well. Harry and the guys got up to get punch, not knowing what their dates would be talking about while they were gone.

"Susan, we're sorry for doing what we did, we only wanted you to be happy." Su Li said, apologizing for the way the Fourth Year girls acted

"It's okay Su Li, I know you meant well, but next time ask me first." Susan told her. Just then the guys got back, carrying two glasses of punch each. As Harry sat down and handed Susan her glass he looked over at Ron, who was now arguing with Hermione.

"Things never change do they?" Harry said under his breath, but Susan and Padma overheard him

"What do you mean Harry?" Padma asked

"Ron and Hermione, they always argue over something. Why don't they just admit that they like each other and go out?"

"Ron is not the right person for Hermione; no one can base a relationship on arguments." Susan said

"Maybe so, but Ron can't see that. I've watched him the last little while; he seems to want the things that I have, even if I didn't want them. Remember when my name came out of the Goblet? He thought that I put it in there even when I told him that I didn't. It wasn't until the first task that he thought someone was trying to kill me." Harry told the group right before Hermione walked over.

"Hey Hermione what's wrong?" Harry asked as she sat down

"It's Ron again. He started yelling at me for coming to the ball with Anthony and not telling him. He acts like we're dating or something; personally I can never see myself dating anyone like Ron, or Malfoy. Could you talk to him in the morning Harry? I'd like to get some sleep."

"Sure thing Hermione, good night, you look beautiful by the way. If Ron has a problem with you coming to the Ball with Anthony then he can just be treated like he treated me back in November. Have a good sleep." Harry told her before his oldest female friend left.

"I think we should leave as well, it's getting late. Do you mind walking me back to my Common Room Harry?" Susan said, giving Harry a look saying 'that's nice'

"Of course not Susan, I should have asked you if you wanted an escort. If you'll excuse us ladies, gentlemen." Harry said before standing and pulling Susan's chair out, letting her stand before offering his arm to her, which she took. Harry then gently led her out of the Great Hall, holding the door for her and bowing slightly.

As the pair went towards the Hufflepuff Common Room, they heard a person running towards them.

"Harry, Harry! Hang on, I want to talk to you!"

"Cedric, is something wrong?"

"No, I just wanted to thank you for telling me what the First Task was. I know what the Second Task is, do you know already?" Cedric said

"Yeah, the Merfolk are going to take someone or something we find dear and put it at the bottom of the lake. I was planning on using Gillyweed." Harry answered him

"If you want, I could teach you the bubble head charm, it would make it easier on the ascent." Cedric asked

"Harry, I think you should take Cedric up on his offer. From what I heard, he was the first person to master it when it was taught. Plus it would put you on a level playing field with the other competitors." Susan said

"Alright, thank you. It can't be any harder then learning the Patronus Charm in third year. Should we start after Christmas then?" Harry asked his new friend and fellow competitor.

"You learned the Patronus Charm last year? Harry, very few people can do that." Susan said

"Yeah, remember the Gryffindor/Ravenclaw match last year, when Malfoy and the others came onto the Pitch dressed like Dementors? That thing I shot at them was my first corporeal Patronus. It's the form of a stag." Harry answered his date.

"I'll see you after Christmas then, maybe you can teach me that Patronus Charm in exchange." Cedric said, hopefully

"Gladly, it might take a while though, and we'll need a Boggart to force into the shape of a Dementor." Harry answered

"Have a good night Harry, I have to escort Cho up to Ravenclaw Tower, and she gets angry when held up." Cedric said before leaving

"That was nice of Cedric, I guess we're 'even' now, even though I only told him to level the playing field." Harry said as the pair continued on their way to the Hufflepuff Common Room.

"Cedric is just trying to do the same thing, just promise me something okay? If you can, help Cedric during this Tournament, and he'll help you, it's in his nature." Susan told him

"I'll do what I can Susan, you have my word." Harry said before saying goodnight and waiting until she went inside the Common Room before leaving for his own bed.

After rescuing Susan from the bottom of the lake, Harry had realized that he cared for Susan as more then a friend, and after some advice from Hermione, who was dating Anthony, decided to ask her out on a more formal basis. They had gone to Hogsmeade together a few times, but always as friends.

"Susan, I know that we got off to a fairly bad start this year, what with the Yule Ball debacle and all, but after that I started to think of you as more then a friend. I guess what I'm trying to say is, Susan Amelia Bones will you do me the honour of becoming my girlfriend?" Harry said as he sat in front of a mirror trying to practice asking Susan out. Ron was of no help as he was treating Hermione like he did before the Troll incident in First Year, so until he came to his senses, Harry was ignoring him.

"Harry, you wanted to see me?" Hermione asked, knocking on the door to the boy's dorm

"Yeah, do you know where Susan is right now? I'm going to ask her out." Harry answered getting up and letting his friend sit down.

"I just saw her go into the Library. You should hurry if you want to catch her. Hey, if this works do you want to double date with me and Anthony?"

"Maybe, if Susan says yes, I'll ask her. See you soon." Harry said before escorting Hermione out of the dorm and then headed for the Library.

When Harry got to the Library he saw Susan just leaving, so he ran to catch up to her.

"Susan, can we talk?" Harry said when he was close enough to her.

"Sure, is something wrong?"

"No, I just wanted to ask you something. Ever since I pulled you from the lake during the Second Task, I've started to think of you as more then a friend. Susan Amelia Bones, would you do me the honour of becoming my girlfriend?" Harry asked after following Susan to a window and letting her sit down before standing before her and bowing slightly. (Those that have seen Stargate SG-1, kind of what the Jaffa do when in the presence of the Goa'uld)

"If you think that I'm going to say no after what you just did you are mistaken. I have never met anyone who is more honourable and more caring in my life. I would be honoured to be your girlfriend." Susan answered before lifting his head up and kissing him on the lips.

When Susan's aunt was killed two years later Harry proposed to Susan and she became Mrs. Susan Amelia Bones-Potter, and it was all thanks to a little blackmail.

Author's Note: Okay, I know I went off the beaten track with the Yule Ball thing, but I hope that it worked. Please review.