"I'm scared Kagome."

"Shh... it's alright Shippo. You'll be fine."

"Tch. Scaredy cat. Are you a demon or a mouse?"

"S-shut up Inuyasha! You can't see anything either!"

"That doesn't mean my sense of smell is gone, idiot!"

"Kagome! Inuyasha's pickin' on me!"

"Shut up you little twerp!"

"Don't fight you two!"

"He started it!"

"Did not!"

"Could we please not squabble until after we're out of the dark, spooky tunnel?"

"K-Kagome, are you sure the jewel shard's in here?"

"That's what the villagers said. I'm feeling something in here."

"Why couldn't we have brought a torch?"

"'Cause if there is a demon, runt, then it'll see us coming and escape with the shard!"

"Don't pick on Shippo Inuyasha! He's scared!"

"It's so dark..."

"Don't worry, my dear Sango. I'm here to protect you."

"Yeah, yeah. Just keep your hands to yourself, monk."

"Heh. I'm surprised the monk hasn't tried anything so far."

"Yeah, really. All this darkness and not one attempted grope."

"You wound me so, my friends. When have I been anything but the paragon of a chaste monk?"

"Yesterday, when we were getting ready to check this cave out."

"Sango got you good for that one, Miroku!"

"... I was merely giving her a reassuring touch."

"Yeah, on her ass!"

"Inuyasha, please. My hand follows no orders, not even my own. I asked it to reassure Sango and it merely went to its favorite place on her lovely body."

"Keep talking like that monk and the next time your hand tries to 'reassure' me, I'll be sure to make that hand obey my orders."

"... duly noted, Sango."

"You tell him, Sango."

"You too, Shippo?"

"Heh. Sorry Miroku, but-"

"Oof!"

"Kagome? Shippo? What is it? I don't sense any youkai- Oof!"

"Inuyasha! You're crushing me!"

"Shut up runt!"

"Hey, watch your hands buddy!"

"Uh... uh... sorry Kagome..."

"That better be an accident Inuyasha, or I'd swear Miroku was rubbing off on you."

"Are you three okay?"

"Yeah... the cave just dips right here, Sango. You'd better be careful."

"Don't worry, dear Sango. I'll be right here behind you..."

"I WARNED YOU MONK!"

"OOF!"

"Ow... Sango, you didn't have to hit me so hard..."

"Would you get off of me, monk!"

"Believe me, Inuyasha, if I could get up, I would, but my legs seem tangled in with someone's..."

"Yeah, mine. So stop rubbing your legs against mine!"

"Sango... could you please give us a hand here?"

"Sure... let me just- AH!"

"OOF!"

"Well... fancy seeing you here, Sango."

"You have one second to move your hand, monk, since I fell on it. After that..."

"No hitting each other! We have to get out of here!"

"... would you all please get off of me? And where's Shippo?"

"... here, Kagome."

"Shippo! Are you okay?"

"They're crushing me..."

"Just stay calm. I'm sure we can get out of this. Inuyasha, can't you move?"

"The monk's heavier than I thought... and I don't think Sango's a lightweight either, since she managed to fall with the Hiraikotsu on her back."

"Making light of a woman's weight? You are such a novice to the ways of women, Inuyasha."

"I don't think I should be taking advice from a guy who tries to hit on every pretty girl he sees."

"Could we please try to find a way out of this? Shippo's starting to look like a tomato..."

"Yeah, yeah, hold on. I'm tryin', I'm tryin'."

"MONK!"

"OOF! Sango, when you hit the monk, try not to hit his head into mine!"

"Okay... this might take awhile."

"Next time anyone suggests we go into a dark cave... they can go to Hell."

---

Naraku shook his head in pitying disgust, waving Kanna away. He really didn't need to see any more.

They foil his most ingenious, sadistic plans.

They escape from impossibly intricate webs of deceit and all but insured demise.

Put them in a dark cave and they fall apart in moments.

Naraku rubbed his eyes tiredly. Why did he bother trying?

If he left them alone they might end up killing each other off anyway.

"And these people are supposed to kill me? God, no wonder it's taken them so long."