Disclaimer: Still don't own anything but the general idea for this fic.

AN: Last chapter, yay. This story was only three short chapters long. XD

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The GREEN Best of Konoha
By SapphireWhiteTigress

Chapter III

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Tenten and Neji stared in shock as the giant green thing of hair that swallowed Gai and burped, sending them flying into a building. They picked themselves up. "Oh no! He ate Gai-sensei!" Tenten cried out to Neji.

Neji raised an eyebrow. "And?" He said carelessly. Gai-sensei and Lee gave him the creeps anyway.

"Neji!" Tenten scolded him. "We have to help them. They are, after all, our teammate and sensei. Now let's go!" She grabbed Neji's reluctant hand and led him away from the monsters.

"Rwwooooaaar!" They roared at each other, deciding to wreck havoc together on the village.

"Where are we going?" Neji asked as Tenten pulled him along.

"We gotta find the others." As she said that she spotted Kiba, Shino, and Hinata, who all seemed unaware of the coming danger. "Hey guys!" She called out to them.

Kiba grinned. "Hey, it's that girl and Neji! What's up?" Akamaru barked.

Hinata nervously blushed. "H-hi Neji-nii-san..."

Neji sighed. "Hello."

"..." Was all Shino felt like offering.

"We have a problem." Tenten decided to get straight to the point.

"What kinda problem?" Kiba asked.

"The village is being attacked by two gigantic mutated green hair." Tenten explained.

"Whoa, really!" Kiba exclaimed. Akamaru barked.

"Mu-mutated gr-green hair...?" Stuttered Hinata.

"..." Shino said.

"Didn't Lee have green hair a little while ago? What a coincidence, don't'cha think, Akamaru?" Kiba asked his dog, which was on top of his head. Akamaru barked.

"Those things are Lee's stupid green hair!"

The other three gave off shock expressions, but you couldn't really tell with Shino since he rarely shows any expression whatsoever.

"Dude, really?" Kiba said. Akamaru barked.

"R-really...?" Hinata shyly asked.

"...?" Shino also questioned.

Neji raised an eyebrow at the silent Shino. Shino raised an eyebrow at him and suddenly, it was a silent stare off.

Tenten ignored them. "We need to find everyone and figure out a way to stop these things! Neji said that they are purely made of chakra, so not many physical attacks can harm it and if you touched it, you'll get sucked in. Also, if you were to absorb it, you'll explode." Tenten said that last part as if it was the most natural thing in the world. A person exploding...the thoughts made them shudder.

Neji and Shino continued to stare at each other in a silent fight. Clear eyes against shades. Byakugan against bugs. The good and the bad. The cool against the cooler. The – well, you get the picture. Neither was relenting.

"M-maybe we-we should, uh, ge-get Na-Naruto-kun to h-help?" Hinata stammered, blushing at the thought of seeing her crush.

Kiba frowned. "What do we need that loser for?"

"Hey! Who you callin' a loser, dog-face!" Ah, speak of the devil. Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura appeared with the group. "Hey, guys! Oh, hey Hinata!" Naruto grinned and waved at them.

Hinata fainted.

They all raised an eyebrow at her.

Naruto shrugged. "Hey, what's up with bug-boy and Neji?"

Tenten glanced at them. "Oh, they're sleeping."

Everyone sweatdropped but decided to take her word for it. "But, there's something else we need to take care of."

"What's that?" Sakura asked.

"THAT!" Kiba and Tenten both shouted, pointing to the advancing green mop.

Naruto, Sakura, and even Sasuke's eyes widen at that. "WHAT is that!"

"That is Lee's hair." Tenten stated calmly.

"Lee's hair?" Sakura blinked, remembering when Lee first came to her two weeks ago with disgusting green hair.

Green Hair #1 roared at them as the larger, Green Hair #2 roared from behind them. They were trapped. During the commotion, Hinata woke up and saw that Naruto was standing over her with a concern look in his eyes.

"I wiilllll eeaaaaaaaat yoooooooooou!" Green Hair #2 growled.

Green Hair #1 also grew a mouth. "Meeeeee toooooooo! FEED ME!"

The kids screamed and ran for their lives, except for Sasuke, because he was too cool for that. And Neji and Shino, because for some reason, they found it a sport to sleep standing up. Tenten rolled her eyes and grabbed Neji, waking him from his slumber.

"What?" He murmured, allowing her to pull him.

Kiba smacked Shino to wake him. "Wake up, man!" Akamaru barked.

Together, all of them ran for their lives, except Sasuke. He's too cool to run like an idiot for his life. As they thought they were safe, one of the mutants started to shoot mini blobs of green hair at them, catching Kiba and Naruto.

"Ah! What is this!" Kiba yelled as he fell over, the green blob wrapping around his middle, sticking his arms to his side.

Naruto also fell. "Hey! This is so not cool!" They struggled to free themselves as the others stopped to help.

"Naruto! Kiba!" Sakura yelled, running to both of her fallen comrades and tugged on the green hair. "It won't come off! Can't you still run?"

"No! I can't move! It's like it paralyzed me or something!" Naruto said, unmoving. He felt oddly tired and he wanted some ramen.

Akamaru started to chew on the hair that held Kiba captive. His tongue turned green and the poor puppy passed out with little swirls in his eyes. "Akamaru!"

Shino used his bugs to try and release the two, but it failed, as his bugs turned a sickly green and started attacking people. Shino cried inside.

"AHH! First green monsters, then green bugs, and now I'm lost! AHHH!" Some random dude yelled, running in a circle until one of the green hair blobs consumed him. "NOO! I'm too young and beautiful to die! There's still much I must do!" And, like Lee and Gai, he was no more.

Speaking of Lee and Gai, let's take a look inside of Green Hair #2:

It was like being in a small dark fuzzy room. It itched in places. Lee was currently wailing. "NO! I must undo the wrong that I caused! I must save everyone! Why did I take those hair products from a stranger! Gai-sensei! I failed you!" Lee's fist connected with something. "Ow!"

"OW!" Someone said.

"Who's there?"

"...this is so troublesome..."

Inside of Green Hair Thing #1

"How could I have allowed this creature to swallow me! Kakashi is sure to win our next challenge if I do not escape! Wait, there will be no next challenge if I don't get out of here! KAKASHI, YOU WILL NOT WIN THIS TIME!" When Gai was finished his speech, he started to swing wildly at the creature's inner cores, only to hit what felt like solid steel. "NOOOOOOOOO!"

"...Keep it down, I'm trying to read Icha Icha Paradise." Gai knew that voice all too well...

"KAKASHI! You're in here too?" He paused. "How can you read in the dark?"

"Shirigan can see in the dark too." Was the explanation.

"Oh."

Back in the real world

"How do we defeat these things?" Sakura asked, helping Naruto up. "I can't get this thing off of Naruto."

"RWOAR!" Both hair things growled as they approached the children.

"I say we give them a sacrifice." Neji spoke with all seriousness in his voice.

"A sacrifice?" Everyone echoed.

Neji nodded. "Show of hands, who votes to feed Naruto to them?" Everyone raised their hands (except Hinata).

Naruto eyes widen. "Hey, wait! Why me!"

"Because you're the most annoying one." Tenten said casually with a smile.

Naruto pouted. "You guys are so wrong. At least I'll die for my country!" He yelled as they all lifted him up and offered him to the hair.

Neji knelt down, holding Naruto over his head. Naruto struggled. "Come on, man! Let me go! Let me goooo! I haven't had lunch let! I was really looking forward to pork ramen today!"

Neji ignored him. "Oh Mighty Green Hair that Belonged to Lee. Please, take this as our offering and leave us be."

Both of the hair creatures stopped in the destruction to look at Neji with the tasty looking Naruto. One of them grabbed Naruto. Neji sighed in relief, until the other one reached out and grabbed him.

"This wasn't part of the plan!" Neji shouted.

Just then, Chouji was walking down the street eating a plate of sushi. He loved sushi, just like he loved everything else that you could eat. Food was the heart and soul of a person. As he was walking, he noticed his friends and the green hair monsters. "Huh?" He walked over to them and tripped over the knocked out Akamaru, dropping his sushi, which went flying towards the still confined Kiba.

One of the stray sushi landed on the green blob that was attached to Kiba and at first nothing happened until it screamed and shriveled away.

Everyone blinked. Kiba grinned. "Alright! I'm free!" Akamaru came to and barked.

Sakura thought for a moment. "I think I know their weakness...Chouji! Do you have any more sushi?"

Chouji nodded and pulled out two boxes of sushi from his pocket. "You're not gonna do what I think you are, are you?"

Sakura nodded and grabbed the sushi boxes. "Quick, everyone, throw some sushi at them!"

Everyone did as they were told, grabbing the raw fish and throwing it at the green monster. They noticed the incoming 'missiles' and screamed.

"No! My only weakness! Nooooooo sushi! Nooooooooo!" As the sushi was thrown at him, he started to shrink and shrink until he exploded, the people he 'ate' came crashing down to the earth. Gai jumped up.

"HA-HA! I knew you stood no chance against my massive manliness!"

"Gai, you have problems." Kakashi said, not taking his eyes off his book.

Sakura and the others aimed for green hair #2. They hit dead on and the same thing as the first happened to the second. He exploded and all the people it consumed came crashing down.

"Yes! I'm free!" Lee shouted as he landed on the ground with the grace of a cow. His hair was now back to it's normal length, but nobody wanted to take any chances.

Neji, being free, grabbed Lee by the collar of his jump suit. "You little annoying green--"

Tenten stopped him. "Neji, not now! We have to make sure this NEVER happens again, then you can kill him all you want!" They dragged Lee towards his home and gave him the most disgustingly sushi bath ever.

Two hours later, they all surrounded Lee, glaring at him.

"And what did you learn, Lee?" Tenten asked with narrow eyes and her hands on her hips.

Lee's eyes were cast to the ground as he sighed. His hair was back to it's original black color. "To never take hair products from strangers..."

"Good." Tenten said, lighting up.

As they were about to leave, that mysterious voice returned. "Would you like some...green nail polish?" Lee's eyes brighten.

"NO!" Everyone yelled and grabbed Lee, taking him as far away from the hidden voice.

The voice sighed as they left and stopped out of one of the bushes to only reveal...-gasp- Orochimaru. "And I thought for sure they would want the nail polish..." He laughed creepily as everything went pitch black.

Before the screen went entirely black, however, Orochimaru's head pop out the black screen. "Would you like some nail polish?"

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AN: I think that was the dumbest story I've ever written. Haha. Sushi...-giggles- So, what'cha thought? Please review!