The Cream situation will be explained in this chapter, and don't get mad at me if Maury's OOC, I haven't seen the show for a long time.
Roommates?
Chapter IV
Maury
All nine of the anthropomorphic animals were on the stage, waiting for the episode to start. Sonic was talking to Tails and Cream.
"Well, why didn't he just ask me for them?" Tails asked. He handed Sonic Shadow's car keys.
"He said he felt strange talking to you, after…"
"Oh… yeah…"
"By the way Cream, how in the hell did YOU get pregnant?"
"Uh, you know how… girls sometimes lie about their age?"
"How old ARE you?"
"Fourteen…"
"Then Tails-"
"I'm still eight."
"Oh. Then that means it's not your…"
"Yeah… Hey! The show's starting!"
--
"Alright! Today we have here four anthropomorphic animals, saying they don't know which of these four are their children's father. First off, tell us what happened."
"Well Maury, it's kind of a long story, but here it goes. One day while my wife was on vacation, Sonic came to my house and tossed me out-"
"Hey! You said I kicked you out!"
"Well, you still threw you out of my house!"
"But throwing or tossing isn't the same as kicking!"
"The meaning doesn't have to be literal- stop side-tracking me, damn it! Anyway, I came back the next day to find that my house doesn't even have a foundation anymore." At which point, the audience jeered and booed Sonic.
"What the hell?" he says.
"Shut up!" Knuckles yelled at the audience. "Let me Finnish."
"Your Finnish?" Sonic asked.
"No, I mean, let me fish. Finish! Anyway, to get back at Sonic, I (quack)ed Amy." The audience booed Knuckles. "Why are they doing this?" he asks Maury.
"They do this all the time, just continue."
"Anyway, after my wife and I (heehaw), I made the mistake of saying, 'I've had better.'" Both Rouge and Amy looked away. "So, she went to Tails."
"He seemed like a trustworthy person." Rouge said in her casual voice.
Says Shadow, "Then Cream must've found out about it, cuz she came to me."
"And then his wife came to me!" bursts Sonic.
"Then that's basically it." Knuckles finished.
"Alright, we'll be back with the results, right after these commercials!"
During Commercials…
"Sonic, you'd better not be my wife's child's father, otherwise I'll have to kill you!" Shadow yelled. "It might not be today, It might not be tomorrow, It might be sometime this week, but I don't know yet, but I will kill you…"
"Why would you want to kill me? Wouldn't you want to make me suffer?"
"Good idea!"
"Oh damn." Sonic pulled out his cell phone and dialed a number. "Uh, yea, mental ward? I got a patient for ya. Yea. He's black and red. A hedgehog. Yeah, he did. Lots of banks, too. Can you pick him off- I mean...up, next week? Okay, good. Bye."
"Damn hedgehog."
End Commercials
"Alright, we're back. And we got the results. In the case of Amy's child, Sonic, you ARE the father."
"Phew." Sonic sighed.
"And in the case of Rouge's child, Knuckles, you ARE the father."
"Sweet."
"And in the case of Blaze's child, Shadow, you are NOT the father."
"What the hell?" Shadow yelled.
"Ah, shit." Sonic sighed.
"I'm gonna kill you, hedgehog!"
"No!" Sonic and Shadow ran around the room at supersonic speed. Amy stood up, pulled out her Piko Piko Hammer, and tried to slam Shadow across the room, hitting Sonic instead. It sent him flying into the wall, knocking him out.
"AAH!" Amy screamed.
--
The Technical difficulties screen appears for about ten seconds
--
"Alright, we're back. Sorry about that." Maury said. "Now we're on to the next person. In the case of Cream's child, Sonic, YOU are the father."
"I never expected it to be me anyways… Wait, Sonic?" Tails freaked.
"Hold on, we're not done yet. In the case of Sonic the hedgehog, Shadow, YOU are the father!"
"SHADOW?" Sonic was surprised.
"Uh, yeah… there's a reason we both have super speed…" Shadow started.
"You asshole! Who's my mother?"
"That's it for today's show!"
--
Betcha never expected that! Anyway, the mental ward joke is going to come in to play in a few chapters, don't know when… Please Review!