O...M...G! I'M SO DAMN BORED! DX Man, there's like, NO fanfics for me to read right now. -.-; For the love of...oh! n.n;;; Yeah, I've updated, whoopie! To tell the truth, I coulda updated for the past 2 weeks, since I had it pre-written...damn my lazy-ness...ahh, well...

DISCLAIMER: Don't own nuttin, ya asshole -strangles disclaimer-

---WHEE---

Everyone was sitting in a circle on the floor and crosslegged.

Scar stood up, beaming drunkly. "My name's Scar and I like swimming naked in green jello!" He announced proudly.

"Whoo! Good for you!" They all cheered, clapping.

Scar beamed more and sat down. "Okay Ed, what about you?"

"Well, excuuuuse me, but I say melted cotten candy ice cream is alot better to swim in. Naked that is." Ed bragged, smirking.

"Oooooo, take me next time you so swimming!" Ayumi squealed.

Ed shrugged.

"ATTACK!!!" Al roared, grabbing a spork and hurtling it at Roy who toppled over, screaming in pain with the spork sticking out of his eye.

"Al, wtf?!" Kiyoko and Riza both shrieked, running to Roy's side.

Al blinked, then gasped. "Oh no!"

Ayumi gasped an all knowing gasp. "Doods, I just realized..."

"What, that a spork just took over my mind and is now trying to enter Roy's brain through his eye? Cuz like...that's what's obviously happening, what else could be the logical explanation of me suddenly grabbing a spork and hurtling it at Roy's eye, I mean really, what are the odds that I would so something like that, it's just so-"

"Shut up Al!" Rei yelled, inturrupting Al's growing rant. He pouted.

Ayumi waved her hand around nonchalantly. "No, I mean something important."

"Humankind being enspaved by alien fork/spoon hybrids ain't important?" Hughes blinked.

"That's right! Now...my realization...Scar can blow up stuff..." She trailed off to stare at a bird flying into the window and ultimetaly dying. She giggled.

"...that's it? And how many episodes of FMA have you seen?" Riza asked.

"Uh? No! I mean, like, we can escape by having Scar blow a hole into the floor!"

"Ah, good idea." Scar did as told, blowing a portion of the floor up. They cheered. "Freedom!" And with that, they fell.

Right back into Roy's office, as if a filmstrip thingy rolled over (which if you squint at the screen when 'watching' this, you could actually see!), screaming as they crashed into the newly restored room.

"Waugh, my spleen! I think I ruptured it!" Izumi screamed.

"Waaaah, thanks alot Ayumi!" Lust wailed.

"Oh, sure, blame me!" Ayumi whined.

"FREAKING SPORK IN MY EYE!!" Ahaha, you should know who said that. If not...them...uhm...you're an idiot.

"I want my Mommy!" Al cried.

Then...Trisha climbed down from the hole in the ceiling, an empty coffee mug in her hand.

Everyone froze what pained thing they were doing, staring at her. Ayumi of course, was first to speak cuz while on Spike she has a big mouth and talks alot in this fanfic and stuff.

"Holy hell, it's Trisha!!!" Ayumi gasped.

"Mommy!" Ed and Al squealed, running over to hug her.

Trisha smiled. "Sorry I was gone so long. The drive-in line was HUGE!" She nodded, holding up a bag of McDonald's.

"Yay, Mickey D's!"

"Wait...I thought you died!" Izumi exclaimed.

Trisha blinked. "Why ever would you think that?"

"Well..." Kiyoko started. "...cuz I saw you die in like...episode 3 or something..."

"Just taking a nap." Trisha sang cheerfully.

"...I sw your grave!" Kiyoko yelled.

"Stage prop." She replied, giggling. "You so silly."

"But the POINT of FMA was that you died and they tried to bring you back to life, dammit!" Kiyoko yelled, flailing her arms.

"You tried to bring me back to life?" Trisha asked Ed, raising her eyebrows.

Ed looked up at the ceiling fan, his eyes spinning as he focused on a particular fan..thingy. "Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...yeeeeees..."

"He failed though." Al nodded.

"What do you mean I failed!?!?"

"Teehee?"

"Well, there we go! They failed cuz I was still alive, so there was nothing to bring back!" Trisha concluded, clapping her hands. "Who wants chicken nuggets?"

"Ooo! I do!" Ayumi yelled.

"Wait! YOU DIED, DAMMIT!!!!" Kiyoko yelled.

"The summary of FMA did say you died." Rei agreed.

"They did? Ahh, they always do that." Trisha sighed.

"Then explain yhow you freaking missed most of the 51 episodes, PLUS the movie, PLUS the Chibi Party OVA!?!"

"Awww, I missed the chibi party!? Shoot...I wanted to go..." Trisha sniffled/

"Hey guys, let's all just forget this and go to the REAL important issue at hand...THERE'S A SPORK IN YM EFFING EYE!" Roy shouted.

"Oh my! How horrible!" Trisha skipped over and grasped the spork handle.

"Wait, what are y-OOOOOWWWWWWWHOLYSHIIIIIT!!!!!!!!" Trisha tugged the spork out, along with his eye.

"OH GAWD! PAIN! AHH! MY FRICKIN EYE! YOU BITCH, LOOK WHAT YOU DID, OWWW, FUCK!"

"Oops!" Trisha blinked innocently. "My bad."

"And this is the REALY story of how Roy needed to get an eye patch. Trisha pulled out out with a spork." Ayumi announced to the audience, bowing at the many applause. "Thank you!"

"Oooo, coolie! A meatball!" Rei squealed, grabbing the eye and stuffing it into her mouth.

Everyone's face pretty much resembled this when they looked at Rei. o.O!?!?! Except dor Roy, who was more like: DX

"Uh...Rei...?"

"Strangest meatball I ever ate!" Rei stated. "It almost tastes like an eye!"

"...that's because it is an eye."

Rei paled. "Oh gawd!" She yelped, running to the window to vomit.

"Make sure to flush!" Scar called after her.

"And the cow went over the moon!

-WHEE-

ZOMG, that was so much fun to write! X3 So glad I finally got off my lazy ass to write this! Yay!

Please review!