You can sleep when you're dead
By lovelywhisper
Summary: The life of an intern is exhausting, but most of all complicated. A short one shot, but might become a multi chapter story. Will be MerMark. Please R & R.
Disclaimer:Don't own anything that is even slightly familiar to Grey's.
You can sleep when you're dead. Never before has a single sentence been so true. And for those of you who don't know yet, it's the perfect sentence to describe the live of an intern, attending, resident, chief of staff or whatsoever. I think it's even one of the most used sentences in the hospital. Or at least at Seattle Grace. They don't always say it, but they sure as hell think it. They mutter it when they see you yawn, some of them think it when you say that you're tired and some of them just say it right to your face. Just so you know where you stand.
Right now I have no idea where I stand. All I know is that I'm the intern. The one who has to listen to everyone, sometimes even to the nurses. Or at least you pretend to listen to them, just so they won't page you for every rectal exam they have to perform. Because let's face it, there's not a living soul on this planet that would volunteer to do rectals. That is the only thing in my line of work that I wouldn't miss.
Something I would miss in my line of work are the great and interesting surgeries. Definitely if you have a great shot on being the intern who gets to scrub in. The one who will have the pleasure to assist on open heart surgery, a craniotomy, a complex c-section and, if you're really lucky, a humpty dumpty surgery. That is, if your name stays on the board instead of being magically erased.
Something I would love to erase is my lovelife. I have been torn apart by both Derek and Finn for I don't know how long. Torn between McVet and McDreamy. And just when I thought it couldn't become more complicated, it did. Courtesy of dr. Mark Sloan. He just had to suggest that I should move one, start over fresh, maybe even with him. Why the hell did he do that? Doesn't he know that my life is already complicated enough without McSteamy making googly eyes at me? Probably not. But I toldhim that I couldn't possibly start something with him. I am forever grateful to the person that paged him right that second, he or she saved me from his reply. Mark somewhat ordered me to get him another beer before walking off to call the hospital, so I did.
I walked over to the bar, ordered a beer from Joe and was about to walk back to the table when Derek stepped in front of me, introducing himself to me like I had never met him before. I can't help but roll my eyes as he explains himself. When he tells me that he wants to start over, start fresh, I can't help but look past him. I see Mark standing there and he obviously heart every word.
I look into his eyes deeply, desperately searching for an answer, but all I get is a blank stare. When I turn my attention back to Derek, I can see Mark heading to the table, grabbing his coat, before walking out the door.
I look at Derek, who, for the first time, actually seems sincere about his feelings. 2 hours ago I might have jumped him right there and then, thanking him for finally coming to his senses. Instead I look at him and tell him it's too late. That I can't be with him, not right now anyway. I need time to think, time to make my own decision. That I think he should enjoy being alone for a while. I know I've always enjoyed being alone. I don't tell him I'm sorry, I just hug him goodbye, before heading to the table to get my coat. Before I walk out of the door, I turn around one last time and the last thing I see is the defeated look in his eyes.
When I reach my car I feel a calm feeling wash over me. I feel like tonight, I have started a new part of my life. The part where I'm not depending on Derek anymore to make me feel good. For the first time in a very long while I feel completely happy. Courtesy of dr. Mark Sloan.
Author's note:Hope you all liked it, I know that I enjoyed writing it. Right now I'm already comtemplating ideas for a second chapter, as I really want to write a chapter full of Mark and Meredith hapiness. Please feel free to read and review!