AN: Yay Crack

Just something short and quick I thought of. Enjoy.

-

"So I heard you're dating Roy?"

Jean Havoc's blue eyes looked up to the source of the question. Maes Hughes was currently hovering above him and the chair he had chosen to sit and read in.

"Uh…yes? Yeah, I am." He began to the other man, initially caught off by his sudden appearance and question.

Hughes pushed his glasses back up the bridge of his nose.

"How long?" he asked next. "Roy never tells me anything anymore since he transferred here." He went on, referring to East Headquarters.

"Uh…about a month…"

The Lieutenant Colonel eyes widened slightly. "A month?" he repeated. Havoc nodded.

He straightened himself back up and rubbed his bearded chin thoughtfully. "A whole month, eh?" he said out loud. "Hey, did you know the two of us dated?"

"Yes…the Colonel told me. Back before the war." Havoc replied, making his sentences quick and concise. He was very nervous right now. There must've been a reason the Colonel didn't share the info of their relationship with his best friend. A reason Havoc could only presume would be Hughes getting jealous. The way he was acting right now didn't settle Havoc's nerves.

"Yup. Six months that relationship lasted, half a whole year! Would've gone on longer had the war not happened and I hadn't met Gracia while on my desk job." Hughes continued to speak.

Havoc thought about a week or so ago, when Roy told him why he broke off with Maes. It was because of the war. It was because Roy was going to the front lines and Maes was doing a desk job. It was because Roy didn't want to hurt Maes with his death, god forbid that happen. And the only thing keeping him from being with Maes again was the other had moved on; on to Gracia.

"'I think…I think I still love him Jean…Even now, years later…"

"So, has he worn a mini skirt for you yet?"

Havoc snapped immediately out of his thoughts and looked to Hughes with a shocked stare.

"What?!" he exclaimed.

"Has Roy worn a mini skirt for you yet?" Hughes repeated.

"Well uh…uh…no…" And when would he ever!? He added in his thoughts.

"Oh. Guess you're not that far in the relationship yet. Such a shame. He's really sexy in skirts. You should ask him to wear one sometime."

Havoc looked on in utter disbelief. "Wait, you mean-HE REALLY WORE A SKIRT!?"

"A MINI skirt." Hughes corrected, smiling.

Havoc didn't know what to say.

"F-F-F-F-For YOU!?" he stuttered.

"That's right. JUST for me!" the other grinned, deviously.

"I-I-I-I don't believe it! Colonel is the last person I would ever expect to-"

"Hey, I didn't think he would actually do it either, but I'm damn glad he did. Seriously, ask him one day to do it. He may resist and protest a little at first but if you force him into it he'll-"

Suddenly there was a small explosion of fire and a very loud boom. Havoc immediately ducked out of the way, but Hughes did nothing. He'd seen this before. He knew it was a controlled blast and nothing would catch on fire as a result.

"You know, after having been with you for six months, that doesn't have an effect on me anymore." He said coolly.

Roy Mustang glared him down from the doorframe, his fingers still out stretched.

"Maaaaaaaeeeeeeeeeeeees……….." he growled menacingly.

"Yes sir?" Hughes replied, not even turning to look at him. Havoc was still hiding.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING!?" the Colonel shouted, stomping into the room and up to the visiting friend.

"Telling your boyfriend about what he's missing out on." Hughes told him, finally turning to look at him.

Havoc peeked his head out from behind the couch and stole a glance at Mustang. What he saw immediately made him retreat; his black eyes seemed ablaze with fiery anger, and his teeth were clenched in the way they only were when he was REALLY pissed off.

"What he's 'missing out on' was a secret between YOU and ME!" Roy hissed in rage.

Hughes nonchalantly cocked his head to the side.

"Oh? Like the time you wore a dress?"

Roy gasped. Havoc's eyes widened more than before. Hughes stood there knowing the anger he had just invoked and loving every second of it.

"YOU SON OF A-!!! YOU FORCED ME INTO THE DRESS AND THE SKIRT!"

"You seemed pretty happy to wear it though. Getting all kinky and stuff."

Roy screamed in frustration. That's when the argument ensued.

"WELL YOU WORE SOME PRETTY KINKY STUFF YOURSELF MAES! HOW ABOUT YOU TELL THE WHOLE WORLD HOW GREAT YOU LOOKED IN HANDCUFFS!?"

"AS SOON AS I'M DONE TELLING EVERYONE HOW GREAT YOU LOOKED IN ONE OF THOSE KIMONOS FROM THE EAST!"

"YOU LOOKED PRETTY HOT TIED UP MAES, WERE YOU AWARE OF THAT?!"

"HA! SO DID YOU!"

"HOW ABOUT THOSE GAGS MAES!? REMEMBER THOSE!?"

"AS MUCH AS I REMEMBER YOU LOOKING LIKE A SCHOOL GIRL!"

"YOU WORE LEATHER PANTS!"

"YOU WORE A LEATHER SKIRT!"

Clamping his hands over his ears, Havoc made a run for it. He shut the door behind him with pleasure.

The other subordinates were all staring at him, wide eyed, full of shock and confusion. Over the continuing screaming, their eyes all asked Havoc what the hell was going on.

They could definitely make out Roy screaming "SEE!? THIS IS WHY I DON'T TELL YOU ANYTHING!" Havoc laughed nervously as the yelling went on behind him.

"They're uh…remembering the good times?"