Chapter 1: The Big Question
After years of rejection, Lee finally stopped stalking Sakura. She didn't like him (somehow) and he needed to respect that.
"But I am so beautiful!" He said to himself. "I must have a girlfriend…"
Tenten and Neji were training in front of him.
"Tenten…" Lee thought. "She's probably the girl that is closest to me…" He pondered for a moment, then shrugged. "Tenten would probably be my next best choice."
"Hello youthful Lee!" Gai sensei came over to him. "Why aren't you training with Neji and, uh, yeah!"
"Well sensei, I've been thinking…" Lee started to explain his thoughts to his almost identical sensei."No need to say anything, Lee," Gai sensei interrupted him. "If you'd like to ask Tenten on a date I think it's a fine idea!"
A question mark formed above Lee's head but he shook it off. "Gai sensei, you are such a genius!" He leaned in to hug Gai sensei but the elder man stopped him.
"Save the hugging for your new girlfriend," Gai told him.
"Yosh!" Lee started to walk towards Tenten. "She'll go out with me! Why wouldn't she? I mean, look at me!"
Lee was standing right in front of Tenten and Neji was right behind them.
"Do you, uh, need something Lee?" Tenten asked her teammate.
"Yes." Lee answered. "Would you like to go on a date with me?!" He put a thumbs up and smiled his creepy, back-shivering smile.
Tenten made a face, but Lee didn't notice. "Go on a date with him…" She thought. "Never, no way, gross, yuck…" She stared at Lee. His disturbing expression, his confident look, she knew she would destroy it completely if she declined.
Neji, on the other hand, was trying to get his jaw off the ground. "Please say no, please say no!" He thought to himself.
"Um… uh…" Tenten eyeballed around her. She saw Neji, who was trying hard not to say something wasn't succeeding very well. Then she stared at Lee, still in his freakish YOSH! Position. "Heh, uh… y…e…s..?"
"Really?" Lee opened his eyes and stared at Tenten. Her face seemed awkward, but he knew he had heard right. "HOORAY!" Lee jumped in the air and hugged Tenten. A stress mark appeared on her forehead. "We can go tonight! I'll plan everything!! EEE!!! I'M SO HAPPY" Lee ran home to do, whatever he does at home.
"Tenten!" Neji yelled at her. "You don't like Lee that way and we both know it!"
"Well, maybe I do!" Tenten explained angrily. "It's not like you care! And either way, did you see his face? I couldn't hurt his feelings like that! Remember when Sakura rejected him?"
FLASHBACK
"My name is Rock Lee." Lee walked up to Sakura. "You are Sakura-san, right?"
"What?" Sakura asked, confused.
"Let's go out together! I will protect you until I die!" Lee shouted in his creepy pose. Then his teeth shined.
"No way."
"What?" He acted confused.
"You're just too, unique, for my tastes." She answered. Then Lee looked down in shame and walked away.
FLASHBACK
"But why Lee?! Of all people you could force yourself to go out with!" Neji waved his hands in the air like he just don't care.
"Well, it's not like any other guy asked me, anyway!" Tenten said angrily as she jumped into a tree and left Neji standing there alone. Well, almost alone.
"Well it's obvious that you like Tenten, too!" Gai sensei said from behind Neji, making the Hyuuga jump.
"WHAT!?" Neji pointed at Gai. "WHAT WOULD GIVE YOU THAT IDEA THAT'S COMPLETELY NOT TRUE WHY WOULD YOU THINK THAT…"
"Umm, Neji?" Gai asked.
"IT'S COMPLETELY UNREALISTIC!" Neji continued shouting nonsense. "INSANE! UNTRUE! NUH-UH! NO WAY! NOPE! NEVER! NooOoOoOoOo!!!!"
"You're just making it more obvious."
Neji stared at his sensei and blushed slightly from embarrassment. Gai noticed this and started talking like in those, father/son awkward conversations.
"All right Neji, take a seat." Gai pointed to a comfortable looking spot on the ground, so Neji sat there.
"AHH!!!" Neji screamed as he started to get sucked into the quick-mud.
"Oops!" Gai pulled Neji out and sat him, covered in mud, on a log somewhere. "Now where was I…? Oh yeah! Now Neji, there's comes a time in every boys' life when he starts to get feelings for a special girl. These feelings are called, uh, hmmm… well, nobody really knows what they're called. It's just, you like Tenten, Lee likes Tenten, so what are going to do about that?"
"Kill 'em!" Neji shot up. "Thanks for the help!" Neji jumped through the trees.
"Wait Neji!" Gai sensei reached out an arm but it was too late. "I was going to say have a bake-off! I'm hun-gry!!"
At Tenten's:
"Hey Mom?" Tenten asked her unnamed mother.
"Yes Tenten?"
"How comes I don't have a last name?"
"What brought this up?"
"I've been wondering for a while."
"Well, it's all because of wine coolers."
"Wtf mate?"
"Well, you see, a long time ago, your great great great great great great grandfather got drunk and died after a loong night at a bar. A baby was born o a hooker that was there and, well, she didn't know his last name, and she didn't know anybody who knew his last name. But she didn't wanna make one up so she just said, aw, who needs last names anyway?" Her mother began to explain to her.
"But didn't the hooker have a last name?" Tenten sounded very confused.
Hey mom shrugged. "How should I know? I doubt the hooker knew!"
"Agreed."
"Now back to the story. For some reason, afterwards, the babies in our family were always male, so they never got a new last name! We even had one gay, but he married another gay guy who wanted to be the female, but let's not get into that. So now we have you, and if you don't get married someday, then we still won't have a last name because it's not like your brother can do anything to help!"
Tenten stared at her mother blankly.
"Tenten?" Her mother called.
Silence.
"Honey?" Her mother turned around. "You look a little stiff. Are you ok?"
Still nothing.
"Answer me this minute or you are GROUNDED young lady!"
Chirp. Chirp.
"That's it! No kunai practice for a we… HEY! This is just a cardboard cut-out!" Mrs. Tenten's mom squeezed the cardboard. "When'd she leave?"
Back to Lee:
"Oh boy!" Lee went inside his home and jumped around. "I'm so excited! Tenten's going on a date with me!! EEE!!!!" He looked in his mirror. "I should probably get into a nicer wardrobe tough." Lee did that spinny thing like they do in the Sims® and looked at his new outfit. "No…" He kept doing this until he got to a green, spandex, tuxedo. "OMG! This is perfect! There's green, spandex, and it's fancy!"
Neji:
Neji sat on the ground, leaning his back against a tree. "Kill him now, or after his date with Tenten?" He thought about this. "I should list the main con and pro for each.
Neji's list:
Kill Lee Now Con: Tenten will get suspicious if Lee doesn't show up. Kill Lee Now Pro: Tenten WON'T go on a date with Lee.
Wait To Kill Him Con: Who knows what Lee could do on the date?
Wait To kill Him Pro: I can spy, also, Tenten can realize how horrible it would be to go on another date with eyebrow-man!
"Well it looks like 'Wait To Kill Him' won." Neji said. "All right, now it's time to spy!"
Neji hopped on over to Lee's home and used Byakugan to see him and a glass next to the wall to hear him.
"Ok, so first we'll go to dinner at Ichiraku Ramen…" Lee listed in his head.
"Oh, wow. He's such the romantic type." Neji snickered.
"Then we can go see a movie…"
"We have a movie theater?" The elder Hyuuga checked his memory. "Ok… I think I remember it."
"And then…" Lee's voice was cut off by someone else's, which was not very pleasant for Neji.
"Hi Neji-kun." Hinata came over to him. "What are you doing with that cup?"
Neji sweatdropped and hid the cup behind his back. "Cup? I don't see any cup. Heh heh."
"Man, and people call ME a stalker." Hinata rolled her eyes.
"I'm not stalking Lee, I'm spying on his and Tenten's date tonight! Oh crap…" Neji just realized what he had said and he covered his mouth. "Don't tell anybody!"
"Now why would I do something like that?" Hinata backed away slowly and headed towards the team 8 training ground.
"Hey Shino," Kiba asked his teammate.
"Yes?" The totally hot Shino replied.
"Why do you wear those glasses all the time?"
"Well, it's because…" Shino ( total hotness) started when Hinata interrupted him.
"OMG!! Guys!" She ran over waving an arm. "You won't believe what Neji just told me not to tell you!"
"Oooo… gossip!" Kiba sounded interested. He walked over to Hinata and they both started gabbing away about Neji and Tenten and Lee and Gai.
sweatdrops "Is this why that kid said I was from the Gossip Group?" Shino wondered. "It's only half the team, that's not so bad."
"Hinata! Kiba! Shino!" Kurenai sensei came down. "Why did you stop training?"
"You won't believe the story Neji told me not to tell you or Kiba but I already told him so I guess I have to tell you too!" Hinata said excitedly.
"Really?" Kurenai sensei got all hyped up. "C'mon, gimme the dirt!"
"Nevermind." Shino walked away from the 3 girl… I mean, Kurenai, Hinata and KIBA. Who has been confirmed as a guy.
After about 10 more minutes everyone (except Tenten, Lee and Neji) knew about the whole plot.
Knock knock! Lee banged on Tenten's front door.
"Hi Lee." Tenten looked exactly the same as usual, only she was wearing a long sleeved pink shirt, kind of like the one she wears when she's 16. "I'll just be another minute."
"Ok Tenten." Lee waited patiently outside her front door. A minute later she walked out.
"Bye mom!" Tenten shouted behind her. "I'll be back by 11!" She turned her attention to Lee. "All right, what's first?"
"We go to dinner at Ichiraku Ramen!" Lee pointed to the ramen shop 6 feet away from Tenten's house.
"Are we taking a limo?" Tenten laughed at her own joke.
"Well, I rented one, if that's what you mean." Lee brought her attention to the large black limousine next to her front yard.
"Oh, uh, wow." Tenten rubbed the back of her neck. "You do know we can walk, right?"
"Lee looked to the left of him and saw the Ichiraku Ramen shop sign." He blushed and said, "Ok, that never happened. Let's go."
Lee and Tenten walked over to the popular ramen shop. "Does it feel deserted in Konoha?" Tenten asked Lee.
"Yeah, it's like nobody lives here except us…" Lee looked around but they couldn't spot anybody except the ramen shop owner. "Oh, well, let's ignore that and eat!"
"All right," Tenten sat down in one of the stools and they each ordered some ramen.
At this point, about 3000 head poked out of bushes and trees, from behind buildings and inside trash cans, and they were all staring at Lee and Tenten.
Tenten shivered.
"Are you ok, Tenten?" Lee asked her.
"What? Oh, yeah, I'm fine." Tenten answered weakly. "I just have the strangest feeling that we're being watched…"
"Weird." Lee shrugged. "It feels fine to me."
"Here's your ramen kids." The ramen shop owner handed them their orders.
"Thank you." They both replied at the same time, which made them giggle.
Neji had already grown a stress mark on his head, and every giggle, word, noise, from them as a couple was making it bigger. "Calm down." He told himself.
"Ok, well I'm all finished." Tenten pushed her bowl in front of her.
"Me too." Lee said. "Now we can go to the movies!"
"Cool!" Tenten replied. "What are we seeing?"
"When Best Friends Betray You." Lee answered.
"Great! I've wanted to see that for, like, ever!"
"Then what are we still here for?" Lee questioned.
"Paying the bill." The owner reached out his hand.
Lee handed the man his money and the two were on their ways to the movies!
End Chapter One