Disclaimer: Naruto isn't mine. Excuse me while I go cry.

Warnings: Language.

Finding Sakura

Final Chapter

By Michiru's Mirror

In the Akimichi compound there are many small sheds that are used to house extra food. Sometimes when they become old, they are abandoned and allowed to dilapidate and fall to ruin. When leaving the shed up becomes unbearable due to rotted beams, an infestation of insects and a terrible smell, the shed is demolished.

Akimichi Chouji loved his family with all his heart but like any teenager, he needed his space. At the age of thirteen he first found one of the recently abandoned sheds and hid himself inside of it. He had been training that day, determined to prove his worthiness to Shikamaru, and instead wound up trodding on Asuma-sensei's foot with his own enlarged one.

Chouji knew that Asuma-sensei didn't really mean all the insulting things he'd said, that the pain in his foot inspired him to uncharacteristic meanness, but that did not make the sensitive boy hurt any less.

The shed was dark and cool and peaceful, and no one had to see Chouji crying in such a shameful unmanly way. Since that day Chouji went to the shed when Shikamaru couldn't help him with his problems or when he just had to be alone to think something through.

It was inevitable that the rest of Team Ten would find out about it. A mission was issued, Chouji had to be found, and the shed was uncovered.

Chouji requested that his friends not reveal his secret hideout to anyone. To his surprise they not only agreed, but made sure to steer clear of the place themselves in a touching display of respect for his privacy.

As long as they weren't abusing the privilege, Chouji found he didn't mind if they joined him in his shed when he felt like company. Shikamaru and Ino would come if he asked and stay until he showed signs of wanting to be alone again. It was simple.

Right now he didn't want to be alone, and fortunately he wasn't the only one. Shikamaru was sitting across from Chouji on the shed's floor, shuffling cards in an increasingly irritated manner as moments ticked by.

"Where IS that damn woman?"

As if in response, the boys heard familiar footsteps quickly approaching the shed. Chouji had been surprised to realize how individual a person's footsteps really were, just like their fingerprints or their eyes or their personalities. These steps were light but steady, the walk of someone who was straightforward, confident, and feminine.

"Sorry!" said Ino as she burst inside, panting slightly. "I guess this makes me fashionably late, ha ha!"

"No, it makes you irritating," said Shikamaru blithely as Chouji put a hand over his mouth to keep from snickering. He was in enough trouble with Ino as it was. Two nights ago he'd fallen straight to sleep after sex after he'd promised he wouldn't. If he started laughing at her, she'd probably never sleep with him again. "Sit down already or I'm going to deal you out."

Ino rolled her eyes and sat. "Well okay, but you should know you're dealing for four."

Chouji froze. "You…you didn't."

Sai walking in the door answered his question. Ino had indeed invited an outsider into Chouji's solitude.

Shikamaru glared at Ino over the deck of cards while Chouji gaped at her with betrayed shock all over his round features. Ino just smirked. Maybe this would teach Chouji not to fall asleep.

Shikamaru shook his head and began to deal Sai in. Subtle hints that he wasn't welcome wouldn't work on that boy, and he knew Chouji was much too polite to throw him out directly. Shikamaru was left to wonder at the depths Ino would sink to to get revenge, though he knew her too well to be surprised. If Chouji hadn't been expecting something like this he was either naïve or delusional.

Sai was looking around the room as he picked up his cards. "This place is really ugly," he commented. "It wouldn't kill you to put a few pictures on the wall, would it?"

Chouji looked like he did when somebody called him fat, so Shikamaru decided to save the situation before everyone in the shed wound up dead. "Ah. So Sai, what brings you here, then?"

"Bijin-san ran into me on the street," said Sai, now studying his cards. "She invited me and here I am."

"And you didn't have anywhere else to be?" said Chouji. Shikamaru grimaced. So much for polite. He'd never dreamed that anything could bother Chouji as much as his weight, but it seemed this place was just as touchy a subject.

Sai was either oblivious to Chouji's hostility or pretended not to notice it. "Nope," he said. "I was training, but Dickless threw me off the field."

"Oh really?" said Ino, not really caring but hoping to change the subject. "How come?"

Sai smiled slightly, but didn't look up from his cards. "I think he had a few things to make right."

This was all wrong.

Watching Sakura suffer in his apartment had given Naruto a nasty kind of satisfaction in some small, hidden part of his mind, but those cruel feelings had left him in a rush the second she had. The change of emotion was so abrupt that he'd sagged low to the ground, real horror welling up to replace the empty space the sadistic glee had left behind. She had walked out and wasn't coming back, because she thought it was what he wanted. He'd hurt her and himself even worse then they'd already been hurting. When had even the dumbest, rottenest part of his mind thought that was a good idea?

Naruto knew he had to fix things somehow, and going after her had felt natural. Didn't Sakura know that nothing was any good if she wasn't with him? What the hell was the point of becoming Hokage if everyone precious to you was lost and it was your fault that they were gone?

Naruto had run through the streets of Konoha fighting an almost physical pain in his chest made from panic and pain and fear. He looked for Sakura down narrow filthy little alleyways and up wide crowded market streets, across rooftops and through restaurants. In the back of a little tea shop with the most mouthwatering array of sweets Naruto had ever seen (he'd have to take Sakura here later), he found Iruka-sensei proofreading reports.

Naruto shouted a hello as he passed but didn't bother to linger. He knew for a fact that Iruka-sensei had about as much experience with women as your average twelve-year-old, and besides, he'd probably yell at Naruto if he knew how stupid his former student had been acting. Naruto didn't doubt that he deserved the scolding, but right now he was in no mood for it. He'd probably get a good thumping from Sakura, and that should be punishment enough.

He'd found her on the training grounds with Sai, and the companiable way they were sitting together and chatting caused a flash of jealousy to add to the weight in his chest.

But then he heard her talking about feeling left out. The way she was comforting Sai was amazing given how hurt she obviously was. Naruto found himself smiling at her in a way he hadn't been able to for days, and it was then that Sai drew Sakura's attention to him.

He saw the hurt and guilt on her face and wanted to stab himself, but that would hardly do Sakura any good. So instead he said, "Sai, get lost."

Sai smiled in that way he had that let you know you were screwed. "Might as well. If it were a man that wanted to be alone with her, I might worry that he had less than pure intentions. But for a eunuch like you there's really no danger."

Naruto boggled. "You're trying to tell me about pure intentions?" He was so astonished by this he didn't even notice the eunuch jab.

Sai paused before realizing what Naruto meant. "Oh, right."

Naruto opened his mouth to say something so brilliantly scathing that it would send Sai running away with tears in his eyes, but Sakura spoke before he could.

"Sai," she said, her voice so small that Naruto could barely hear her. "Please."

Sai turned to Sakura and studied her as best he could when faced with her back. His dark eyes trained themselves on the back of Sakura's head and he went still, looking more like a marble statue instead of a man. His expression was terribly serious, as though something very important that he hadn't understood before now was becoming clear to him.

Finally he nodded and stood up. He walked over to Naruto on his way off the training field but only said, "Later, Dickless," before passing him by and disappearing into the rapidly darkening night.

Naruto watched him go, not because he was interested, but because it was better to watch Sai's retreating figure than Sakura's cowering one. The goddamn pain in his chest still wasn't going away.

But however cowed Sakura was, however subdued and humiliated, she was still the same impatient Sakura that he knew. Before Naruto could gather enough courage to turn to her, she had come up behind him.

"Naruto?" She said, her voice hesitant.

It struck Naruto how wrong the training field was for this discussion. The field was a violent place for fighting and killing, and it somehow polluted and ruined the words he wanted to say. It was only days ago that he fought a possessed Sakura right here on this green.

"Okay," he said, "Earlier—y'know, in my apartment?"

Sakura looked at him as though he was the biggest idiot on earth. "I'm not likely to forget, Naruto."

Naruto, not in the mood to joke, gave Sakura an irritated look only to feel embarrassed and guilty when she shrank away. He was overwhelmed by helplessness and anger—to think that mighty Sakura had been reduced to this, and that his most important connection had been so nearly broken!

Well, was he Uzumaki Naruto or not? Did he walk around feeling helpless and letting his precious people give in to their feelings of helplessness? Hell no!

That tiny, wormy part of his brain that made him watch Sakura leave his room crying hours ago poked its head out of the depths of Naruto's subconscious and began to whisper in his ear.

She deserves this…

Naruto had a brief, clear mental image of himself drop-kicking that part of his consciousness far, far out into the distance. Anything, even a part of himself, that hurt his Sakura-chan deserved no less. Besides, what about the consequences to him? He never wanted to feel as angry at himself again as he had when he watched Sakura run out of his apartment. If this part of him was making him hurt himself, it was just a big fat traitor, that was all, and a nice hard kick was just what a traitor deserved. So there!

Naruto realized he was nodded emphatically only after he caught sight of Sakura's face; she looked like she was beginning to worry for his sanity.

Naruto cleared his throat and scratched the back of his head, blushing. "Right. Right. Anyway.

"So, back in my apartment. That went all wrong and badly. So you have to come back to my apartment now so we can do it again." Naruto had not planned this, but as soon as he said it he decided it was a fabulous idea.

Sakura didn't seem quite as convinced. "…What?"

But Naruto was already running back to his apartment, not doubting that Sakura would follow, because this was him and Sakura-chan and so it would be all right in the end.

They reached his apartment in moments, and then Naruto opened the door and blocked it before Sakura could come in. "Start again!" he insisted. "Now, you knock, just like last time." He nodded firmly and shut the door.

Sakura was left standing on the doorway for a moment, wondering at what Naruto used for his brain.

Well, she had promised she'd do whatever she had to make him feel better, and she'd meant it. She supposed letting him act like a lunatic was better than being thrown out of his life.

Sakura took a deep breath and knocked on the door. She knew Naruto was waiting on the other side but was still a little taken aback with the flourish he used to open it.

"Sakura-chan!" he boomed so loudly that she winced. "How wonderful to see you!" Naruto frowned for a second, clearly trying to remember if those were the words he had planned on saying. Apparently they were good enough, because he nodded his head and then stepped aside to let her in.

"Naruto, this is getting silly—"

"Shh!" Naruto flapped his arms wildly at her. He had a deeply indignant look on his face because she wasn't going along with the script. "This is where you apologize!"

Sakura prayed for patience. She had almost completely forgotten her sorrow in the face of this annoyingly, wonderfully familiar Naruto who was now hissing instructions and waving his arms like a child begging for attention, and in her own familiar affectionate exasperation. It felt so good and natural that she wanted to cry, and if she had to go along with a little bit of silly role-playing to get it back then what the hell was the problem with that?

So she nodded, and again sank to her knees as Naruto turned his back. She did not bother to point out that Naruto had no reason to turn his back to her if he was no longer uncomfortable facing her; this was his fantasy after all, unconventional as it was.

"Naruto," she said, "I'm sorry. She meant it, and did her best to wish her good intentions into the very air, willing them to reach him—

"Okay."

Sakura blinked.

She couldn't have heard that right. It couldn't be that simple. Not after the days of agony and humiliation and the things he'd said to her not two hours ago in this very apartment. "What?"

"I said, 'okay,'" said Naruto. Sakura looked up, and he was grinning down at her with confidence in his eyes. He was finally sure he was doing the right thing.

"B-but…" Sakura didn't know why she was fighting this, only it was too good to be true and she was so scared that he'd take it back. "But I slept with Sai…"

"And I called that 'disgusting' and ran out on you."

"I hurt you…"

"I hurt you as kyuubi."

"I was dangerous to myself and others and didn't even tell you…"

"Yeah and I didn't notice—Sakura-chan, this is pointless!" Naruto was kneeling down with her then, grabbing her shoulders and looking into her eyes so intently that Sakura couldn't doubt her words. "You shoved me when we were kids and I didn't realize when you were all fucked up with doubt before the first chuunin exam. You knocked me aside for Sasuke and I didn't bring him back when I promised. We can go in circles like this all day but I don't think you owe me anything, and I don't want you out of my life."

Sakura was crying, but neither she nor Naruto was surprised by this. "But…but…"

"Sakura, shut up." Naruto smiled, and mentally gave the cruel part of him that had hurt Sakura earlier the finger. That part of him was sulking in a corner, thoroughly defeated and barely a presence, because seeing Sakura happy was so much better then seeing her sad. "Look, I had to go for less than a week thinking you maybe weren't going to be in my life anymore, and I could barely function. I dunno what losing you permanently would do to me and I'd rather not find out, okay? Can we just skip the blame and the years of therapy and at least be friends now?"

Sakura wanted so badly to believe, but she had to check. There was still an inner-cynic whispering that all this couldn't be real. "You don't hate me?"

"No," said Naruto firmly. He frowned thoughtfully. "I'm not sure, but I don't think I'm capable of hating you."

"You don't think I'm a slut?"

"Not unless I'm a murderer for the things kyuubi's done."

Sakura bit her lip. "Are you mad at me?"

Naruto looked surprised again. "What, you're not pissed at me? Sure I'm mad. Mad will pass."

Sakura bit her lip harder and twisted her hands into her red shirt. "…Does that mean I can hug you now?"

They embraced on the floor of Naruto's tiny, dirty apartment at twilight, without any dramatic breezes or romantic moonlight to make the moment beautiful. That was all right. To them, it was beautiful without any help.

It wasn't simple.

For the first week after they made up, Sakura wondered if her heart would ever stop hurting when she looked at Naruto, and Naruto wasn't sure if he'd ever be able to see Sakura's face as it was instead of twisted and bloody as it had been the night he'd seen her in Sai's apartment. They would look at each other and then look away. It took more courage than they had to face each other for long.

Still, they always went back to each other the next day. If this was what it took to fix things, then the suffering of hard work was infinitely preferable to the suffering of losing each other completely. But still, there were days when trying yet again seemed unbearably exhausting.

Then one day Team Seven went out for ramen at Ichiraku, and Naruto realized that wasn't thinking about the horrible ordeal they'd been through. He'd been staring at Sakura for twenty minutes without seeing her bloody and violated in Sai's apartment. Three days later Team Seven was out training; Naruto was laughing at a joke Sakura told when it dawned on him that he'd again had no nightmare images in his head for hours.

Another day, Sakura went to a romantic movie with Ino. After sighing at the lead actor's visage, swooning at the climax and going out for a soda with her crying best friend, she found that Auntie hadn't once entered her mind that day.

So the days grew easier to bear, and Naruto and Sakura slowly grew to enjoy each others company again. It took much more time than either wanted to give, but they gave anyway because it was better than losing the most precious relationship in their lives.

They got better. Neither Sakura nor Naruto's inner demons were enough to tear them apart, and time and effort were enough to bring them together.

A year later Sakura lay in bed letting her thoughts drift wherever they wanted. Naruto's arm felt heavy around her waist, and his snoring was loud in her ears, but tonight Sakura was too tired to even notice. It was winter, and she was warm and comfortable in her soft bed nestled against a body she trusted. Sakura felt as though she was floating high above Konoha, a free spirit content to watch the world pass her by.

She saw Sasuke, alone and cold in some faraway place exposed to the elements, desperately trying to focus his hatred enough to push past pain and loneliness. Moments like these, when his body was miserable and there was no training or fighting to distract him from his memories and thoughts of what he'd done, were harder than others. Sasuke would think of Naruto and Sakura and Kakashi and his parents, and hate himself for the sickening feeling of warmth that would come to him. He sat shoved up against a rock, the best cover he could find, and shivered until he thought he might break apart.

She saw Kakashi sitting by Obito's grave chatting as though his friend was sitting across from him in a bar. He'd trained that day with Naruto and tried to show the boy a new jutsu. Naruto had worked hard as usual and put all of his effort and chakra into the training, but a distraction in the form of a traveling ramen truck had forced an end to the session. Naruto, with an alarming amount of chakra built up in his palm, spun around without realizing Yamato had snuck up into striking distance.

Tenzo flew a good three meters, Kakashi said. It was very impressive. He smiled, content to be with one friend discussing another on a quiet night when the village was secure. This was all he'd ever really wanted out of life.

Sai was nearby, sketching the Hokage monument, his pencil steady even in the dark. His expression was blank as ever, and Sakura had no inkling of the thoughts that ran behind that porcelain face. Confusion perhaps, or happiness or excitement…or maybe there was nothing at all. He still knew himself so little that she couldn't even begin to understand him.

Tsunade was still hard at work in her office, sake jugs scattered around her desk and a pen in her hand. There was such an almighty scowl on her face that when her poor assistant tried to check on her he was almost rooted to the floor by the force of the gaze locked onto him.

Well? Tsunade barked, throwing the pen with what would have been deadly accuracy had she not been drunk off her gourd. Do you see any full sake jugs on my desk? I sure don't!

The assistant ran out the door so quickly that he knocked it right off his hinges, the sound of his swearing Hokage following him down three flights of steps and out the door.

Sakura realized she was giggling in a way that was bound to wake Naruto up if she didn't cut it out. She leaned her head sideways and muffled the noise into Naruto's shoulder, the gentle huffing of her breath and clacking of her teeth against his flesh enough to make him squirm slightly. Sakura did it again, because it was funny to watch his brow furrow and his shoulders rub against the pillow like a puppy trying to satisfy an itch.

But she was too tired to maintain the energy she needed for the game, and now was not the time for mischief. Not when she would need her energy for the upcoming days dealing with Sai and his confusion and Sasuke and his almost-ruined soul.

There was so much to do…but Sakura decided to worry about it tomorrow. Tonight Tsunade was hard at work protecting the village so that they could relax and sleep, and even Kakashi-sensei was letting himself unwind. Sakura would follow his example.

She turned even closer into Naruto's body and burrowed her way into his chest with a yawn. There was no better place to be than here, and nothing better to concentrate on than Naruto's twitching and his warm arm and comfortable body. Everything else would just have to wait.

Sakura fell asleep.

Big huge massive thanks to everyone who stuck with me, and those of you who came onboard for the ride later on. I remain very open to criticism and ideas.

This story is complete with no future chapters to be written, but I might edit some of it since I'm not satisfied with everything.

I very much owe this fic to Ceras Gala, who beta'd me brilliantly and gave me great ideas all the way through. Thank you, thank you, thank you, you're awesome.