Awww i gots no reviews this hour or something. I suppose everyone's sleeping. Oh well that's two chapters down so be happy.

The Black Knight steadily stood in a large room with decorative windows and walls. Ena stood in front of him, calmly awaiting her execution.

"Do you not even attempt to fight me?"

"I do not dare match your strength."

"How very asinine. But I don't really care. Before I cut you in two pieces, are there any last words?"

"…If you see Nasir, tell him Ena was sorry."

The Black Knight snickered.

"Yeah… I'll do so if I remember. Now… rest in peace, bitch!"

Just then Ike ran into the room, but was too late to stop the sword from slashing the dragon.

"Turn around and face me, dick!"

"My my. Your luck really sucks ass."

"Did you kill her?!?"

"…No. It seems she still lives… somehow."

"Maybe you're getting old!"

"Bite me!"

"OKAY!"

"Oh god damn it… I hope you at least have the brain capacity to remember bringing Ragnell."

"Of course! I have it RIGHT here!" Ike smirked, struggling to hold it high.

"…It… looks clean… um… have you even used it all?"

"…No?..."

"…Wow…… and you'd think that you can't get any stupider, then you surprise everyone."

"Yeah? Well… bite me!"

"Oh you just stole that from me!"

"NO IT'S A LIE!!!"

"Can't we just fight already!"

"Gladly!"

And Ike held Ragnell to the side, as he ran straight for The Black Knight! Swinging upwards, The Black Knight easily deflected with a horizontal slash. Ike struggled to keep the silver sword from cutting his neck off. Why Aldonite was so close that Ike bit into the sword to see what it tasted like!

"PARMESAN!" and Ike ducked, did an unnecessary backflip, and jumped high in the air for another slice, but still failed.

"…You prove not as stupid as the other times… But let's make this fight interesting. How about a… game of wits…"

"I like those!!!"

YOU CAN PLAY AT HOME IF YOU WANT!

"Well then… QUICK! What's the formula for AS!"

"…Formula for ass?"

And Ike got a face full of red laser cheese.

"Quite simply it's SP (ATK – WT), but if ATK – WT is a positive number then it does not apply!"

Ike struggled to think of a question. Then got the perfect one!

"What… is the maximum HP anyone can have!"

"…………………80!!!!!" The Black Knight shouted in complete shock of Ike's stupidity, shooting an even stronger laser!

"How do you determine if one can attack twice?"

"If the screen says so!!!!"

"FOOL! If a character's AS is four more than their foes. But it is much easier to determine so in your head by using detailed battle information than simple!"

( A/N: It's true! I use detailed all the time cause I can THINK! And whenever I go to someone's house and they use simple, I get confused cause my logic sinks in, and I laugh at them for not thinking! Of course I've… only really been to one person's house who plays the game… but I DO know other people whom I have not met who DO! Cause actually it's much easier to use detailed if you want to know the best way to use your turn; that way the AS of each of your characters sink in so you don't have to constantly compare attacks to see where the 2x appears.)

Ike slowly stood up with after having like two concussions.

"What is… the maximum HP a LAGUZ CAN HAVE!!!!"

"…I'm not even going to answer because you deserve this swing too much!"

Ike flew across the room, coughing his blood. But just then Oscar raced into the room.

"Oh um hey Ike. Mist really wanted to help and all, so…"

"NEIGH!"

"Ah, now I can destroy the whole family tree!"

"Um I'm not part of the family-" Oscar tried to say, but then two bishops and a halberdier ran into the room as well.

"They threaten The Black Knight!... Kinda!"

"Do not interfere, I don't need assistance against queers like these."

"Then um… GO AFTER THAT UGLY THING!"

"You better GOD DAMN WELL be talking about Mist!" Oscar cried, preparing his lance

"…Face the power of Light!" said one priest as a magic ball appeared above his head.

"Well this shouldn't be hard, I mean how the hell does light hur-"

But then the light struck at Oscar's face, who fell off Mist in a seizure.

"ALL I SEE IS A HORRIBLE RAINBOW!!!"

"It is over, Ike!" said The Black Knight

"I will NEVER give up. I just gotta know how you do that laser thing!"

"…You just swing the sword at nothing."

"Ahh I see…"

Ike did so, but the charge of blew light didn't fall off the tip of his blade.

"NO! You're supposed to actually HAVE a target! Now if you don't release it, it will grow so massive it will explode all over you!"

"AAAH! SCARY!"

Ike swung at a window as the charge was about nine times bigger than it should be. It deflected off the window, off the throne, off another window, off a column, off Oscar's bare ass, and made a direct course for The Black Knight's head. Upon impact, he was completely set ablazed, and fell over barely alive.

"…Ow…why did I help you… was it some clever plan all along?..."

No. But Ike did a victory dance, then stood before the defeated General.

"And NOW, it is time to see who the man behind the helm has been all along!"

Ike took off the helmet, smiling at first, but his face quickly changed to complete shock.

"Oh um… hey there, Ike."

"FATHER!!!!!!!"

"Yeah that's me."

"YOU'RE THE BLACK KNIGHT!!!!"

"Yeah pretty much."

"HOW!!!! HE KILLED YOU!!!!!"

"Well that is quite a story, you see-"

But before the commander could finish, Nasir ran into the room, and stood beside Ike.

"Stand back, Ike! I must finish what must be done!"

He transformed into a mighty white dragon!

"No Nasir wait you don't understand!"

Nasir inhaled

"NASIR DON'T DO IT!!!!"

But it was too late. A blazing white flame engulfed the commander whole. Ike stared in shock, Mist turned her head as she cried, and Oscar had no idea what the hell was going on.

When it was all over nothing remained where the commander was; just a thin pile of smoking ash.

"…The Black Knight… has fallen?" the Daein soldier tried to say.

"I suppose so."

"You… YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS! NOW! ACTIVATE THE TRAP!"

Suddenly the whole castle shook violently!

"IKE! GET OUT OF HERE!" shouted Nasir

"COME ON OSCAR!" shouted Ike, and they made an escape.

"What about us!" said a priest

"Well…" thought Ike, "…do you have any friends outside the casle?"

"No."

"Then… have a nice death!"

"Oh…" the three moaned.

Just then Ena stood up with not a scratch on her.

"Letsa getta outta here…a."

So the two dragons ran outside, and soon the castle completely collapsed. It was actually a pretty lame collapse, because from how everyone saw it, it was just paused pictures shaking. But soon it was all over, and a cloud from the rubble blew across the land. It was over.

…

"Mother… Father… I killed him… Well sort of…"

"Ike you did it!" screamed Oscar

"Yes… but all I did was prove Father's strength. You see I was never better than Father, I just had to show his true skill since I was his son… an act of vengeance… that was all…"

"…The hell you talking about!"

"I have NO idea! I love you all!"

And so all the Greil Mercenaries gathered around Ike and had one big group hug. Mia got pushed out, and Rolf started humping Ike's leg.

…

"How is she?" Ike asked later that evening.

"She appears to be fine, and should regain consciousness tomorrow. She just needs rest. Also, why the hell did you help a traitor, Ike?"

"Well I never really thought of you as a traitor. You were such a pussy not to fight with us I didn't think you were capable of much harm."

"I…see…"

"Yeppers. But I must ensure you don't do something so stupid like kill my father again. SO what are you willing to do for me?"

"I'll… lick your armpits."

"No, I want something MORE! Fight with us and I'll forget any of this ever happened."

"…I WANTED YOU TO SEE MY SKILLS BY KILLING HIM! NOW I'LL KILL YOU!"

"HAHAH oh Nasir you're so funn- AAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!"

…

"Hey… I'm really sorry for stuff my arm you're your ass… and then transforming, Ike."

Ike just laid on his cot, staring at the wall, and still in pain.

"Well… I'll leave you alone…"

Ike continued to stare, and soon Makalov slowly slid into the tent.

"…Now you're one of us……" and he slid back out without a sound…