A/N: All right, folks, let's try this again. : )

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Chapter 19-…As We Know It

"Sirius?" Morgana whispered in a panic.

"That was just me being clumsy, relax," Sirius said softly back.

They were patrolling the highest floor of the boarding school, save the wings. The eaves from the roof slanted all the way to the floor; large windows were cut into the walls and roofing. The point of the ceiling was magnificently tall, but the room was completely bare, allowing the moonlight to pour onto the floor uninterrupted as Morgana and Sirius paced, always directly opposite of one another. She guessed, from the time that had passed since the clock tolled and the dull throb in her feet, that it was nearly two in the morning.

There were several other stations throughout the boarding school. Lily and James were watching from the north and east wings, respectively; Chris and Allie guarded the south and west wings; Remus, completely silent, patrolled the forest; Peter was a lookout in the large tower where he could see above the tree line and past the woods; and Morgana and Sirius looked down on the grounds. The room was huge- less of a room and more of a hall than anything.

"I doubt there'll be much action tonight, Morgana. They would have done something by now."

"You keep saying that, but I'm telling you, they'll come. I can feel it."

"Oh, be optimistic," he chastised gently.

"Seer!" she sang, pausing to point at herself. Sirius gave her a look to tell her he was unconvinced. "Remember when you always used to say I was part Seer? Trust me on this one."

"I trust you; I just don't trust my pre-teen intuition."

She snorted. "If only you trusted it at all. You were far less… irksome, then. It was endearing rather than annoying like your nearly-nineteen-year-old intuition," she teased, grinning. Her face fell once more and she began pacing again.

"Oh, come on. Just-"

"Sh!" she hushed, stopping abruptly to stare onto the grounds. "Someone's out there." Sirius was at her side in a half-second.

"It's just Remus."

"He shouldn't be this close to the building. Something's up."

They watched the figure disappear into deeper woods. A minute later, Remus's Patronus shot into the room.

"They're coming. I'll be to the school in a minute. Call Frank's group. Get ready to fight," Remus's voice commanded.

"I told you! I bloody told you and you didn't listen! You're such a freaking man!" Morgana exclaimed as they sprinted from the room.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." Sirius's Patronus shot out of his wand and disappeared instantly as it raced to the hospital. Sirius ran at the banister and slid down it, Morgana copying him. She never thought that that time waster from Hogwarts would pay off during the war.

"Are we sure that every room's completely secure?" she shouted.

"And soundproof, I reckon," he called back to her, grinning.

Their feet hit the ground running. Morgana quickly passed Sirius, her shoes slipping and skidding on the marble floors as she scrambled around corners, flying to the front doors where Lily, James, Chris, and Allie were waiting.

"Are we-" Morgana cut off while someone pounded from outside the door.

"It's Remus and Peter, let us in!" Remus said through the door.

"How do we know it's you, Moony?" James called.

"Allie… Allie, I asked you out on February 12th on the way to the Owlery. Remember?"

"Let them in! Let them in!" Allie exclaimed.

"Did you send for the others?" he asked Sirius once inside.

"Yes, the moment we got your message. How long until they're here?" Sirius replied.

"Five minutes, tops. I'm guessing about twenty of them, but I can't be sure. There's probably more. I'd bet on it."

"Merlin, they've got us more than doubled," Lily whimpered, letting her head fall and clasping the back of her hair.

"We can try to wait inside for as long as we can. Set a spot or two to try to get them before they get us. We won't have long. Stun them, knock them out, I don't care if you have to pull their ears until they faint- do what you have to," Sirius commanded, sweeping down the hall. "I'll try to bring one or two down from the window over there. James, come with me. Lily, Peter, Chris, Allie: split and cover this front face of the school, the others go to the south side and try to hex anyone from that direction. Morgana, go with Remus to the west side and shoot from the windows. When the time's right and you've done all you can do inside, go out through these doors and shout to let the others know. The longer this building can protect us, the better. The others will be here soon," he called over his shoulder.

Morgana glanced at the remaining faces and gripped Allie's hand, which was closest to her. Remus tugged at her arm and she let Allie's hand slip away, running after him.

"Don't let them get you. Switch windows, go after different targets, aim well- quality rather than quantity- and, for Merlin's sake, duck," Remus instructed, tapping his wand on the bottom left pane in each window, vanishing them as he walked by. "Don't make me have to explain anything to Sirius."

"I won't," she said forcefully, stepping up to a window.

"I'm praying that it works out that way," he murmured, taking his position. "Okay, get ready. See that? They're almost to the clearing." He paused. "Are you afraid?"

"Not as long as the adrenaline holds out," she growled, looking over at Remus who was wearing a small, proud smile.

"On my word," he commanded gently. She heard him exhale deeply. "Wait until they're a little closer. Keep steady, Morgana."

The dark shapes glided a little closer to the school, very slowly.

"Come on, you filthy, ignorant… vile… disgusting bigots," he whispered. "Get ready… wait… wait for it… GO!"

Morgana shot a stunning spell at the Death Eater closest to her side. She missed but aimed again and the black figure crumpled to the grass. Immediately, the others began to move, crouching and blindly shooting curses at the building, most reflecting off of the brick. She could hear the walls cracking and crumbling on the outside. How many could they take down before their barrier failed?

She dashed to another window, aiming several spells at the forms before scuttling two windows down. She peeked over the sill of the pane, sticking her wand out just enough to aim at one of the Death Eaters that was a bit more stationary. Both her stunner and Remus' hit the enemy at the same time- it rose up a few inches and then flew backward, the bone white mask falling off as its owner hit the ground. An instant later, there was a deafening crack and Remus was crouching behind her, his arms holding her protectively as razor sharp shards of brick flew in all directions.

"We have to move to the front."

"We only got three!"

"Better than nothing! Three out of seven is pretty damn good. We have to get to the others to make it to the grounds!"

She shot one last spell at a larger Death Eater, the hem of its robes igniting before she bolted after Remus to the front lobby.

"Didn't expect to see you all so soon!" James shouted at the pair, Sirius on his heels.

"These walls are too old- they're hardly any use. We got three out of seven," Remus told him as Allie and Chris sprinted to them.

"We only got one from the nine on our side! There was glass everywhere," Allie said, her voice shaking as Morgana noticed the small, multiple scratches on the girls' faces.

"Sirius and I win- four from eight!"

"I got three out of nine!" Lily called. Peter was several strides behind her.

"Twenty-two left…" Morgana breathed, terror replacing the adrenaline. "More than two each…"

"There's that abandoned house near the church on the west grounds," Remus told them. "We have to try to make it there. Most of the western wall is blown out, that's where Morgana and I came from. Let's go out that way and try to lead them there. It'll keep them away from the kids at least. Hopefully the others will be here soon. They'll be able to find us."

James led the group down the hall, sprinting.

"Morgana," Sirius sighed once she had caught up with him. "You're okay? No hits?"

"No, I'm fine."

"How many did you get?"

"One and Remus and I hit another at the same time."

"That's my girl. Get ready, love."

They burst into the night air, Chris and Peter at their heels.

Without delay, the air cracked and flashed with spells. Sirius kept close watch on Morgana, never more than arm's length from her.

"Keep moving, Morgana!" Sirius shouted at her. "We're going to get left behind!" Lily, James, and the others were at least fifteen yards away and they kept moving.

"I'm trying!"

"No, you're not! Not hard enough! You're going to get us killed!"

Anger coursed through her and, in a second, she disarmed and stunned the Death Eater she had been fighting before jumping in front of Sirius and hexing his Death Eater.

"You want to rephrase that, Black, because you're really pissing me off tonight!" she shouted in his face.

He broke into a wide grin. "I love you."

"Git," she growled, dragging him off to run another ten yards before they had to duel once more. She felt hot pain sear at her head. "Dammit!" Morgana roared, aiming several hexes and a stunning spell at one Death Eater so that when he fell back, his face was covered in boils that began bursting and growing back.

"What's wrong?"

"Don't worry about it. Get going. We're behind again."

"Are you-"

"Move, Sirius! I can take care of myself, no offense!" They both ganged up on Sirius's opponents and raced to the group, finally catching up with them. Everyone was fighting at least two Death Eaters. Lily, James, Remus, and Allie each had three. Morgana noticed that Chris was favoring her left side and leaning on Peter for support as they fought side-by-side.

"Morgana, help Lily," Sirius yelled, running to help Remus who was getting pushed back farther and farther.

"How's it going?" Morgana said, jumping in next to Lily.

"Oh, Merlin, thank you!"

"Anytime."

Lily threw a curse at one Death Eater and he was knocked out in an instant.

"There're more! They're at the school!" Peter shouted.

The battle seemed to freeze for a moment, eyes from both sides turning to see the ten or so silhouettes in the distance illuminated by their own curses as every spell that had been put up in protection of the school was stripped away. Would the two spells that Dumbledore had cast even work?

The split second distraction gave Morgana an advantage and she quickly overpowered the smaller Death Eater she and Lily had been battling. As if on cue, the brawl ensued once more.

"Go help Allie! I'll take care of this one…" Morgana suggested to Lily through gritted teeth, circling the cloaked man like a wolf. He had to be seven feet tall and weigh more than the four Marauders combined. Morgana would be able to dodge him and move faster than he would.

'And I was a Seeker,' she thought, internally grinning.

"Take care of me, will you?" he laughed, a huge booming sound. "Is this all Dumbledore could spare for the lives of hundreds of children? Eight baby-faced students?"

"Really? And what's good ol' Uncle Voldie got up his sleeve? An oversized oaf with two left feet and bratwursts for fingers? What'd he have to do to get you to join? Offer you a cookie factory?"

"We're going to win this."

"Yeah, well, don't count your chickens before they hatch. Of course, they're probably just one big omelet to you," she taunted before aiming two of the nastier hexes she knew. He dodged them with surprising ease.

"If I'm such a huge target, why can't you hit me, midget? Avada-"

"Shut up!" she shouted, waving her wand with no particular spell in mind. He broke off, clawing at his throat for air. "Stupefy!" The man toppled. She ran over to him and kicked his beefy stomach in anger. "Piece of -!"

She whipped around as someone shouted in pain. James crumpled into a ball on the grass, motionless.

"Prongs!" Sirius roared, his face contorted in rage, abandoning Remus (who was now holding his own) and leaping over James to take his place. "I'm a bit annoyed with you gits, you know!"

Lily ran to tend to James and Morgana replaced her to help Allie who was now fighting four. She was battling with her left hand, her right arm limp at her side.

"Hey, you!" Morgana screamed, conjuring a rock to repeatedly bludgeon one of the Death Eaters while another slashed his wand through the air. Morgana's legs felt as if they were on fire and she fell to the ground. She struggled to get up with one arm, shooting hex after hex at the opponents, her heart pounding in her ears and for a moment, her mind was blank.

It was all moving so fast.

She shook her head and dodged several more curses, shooting off her own as she gritted her teeth, her breaths hissing out as she panted.

Morgana saw one of Allie's adversaries fly backward and hit a tree, sliding down its trunk to move no more.

"Yes!" Allie yelled, eagerly dueling her other at an even faster pace.

"Peter!" Chris shrieked from behind her. Morgana's opponents refused to let her see what was going on with her friends. She heard Chris whimpering.

"Stupefy!" another voice shouted. There were two more flashes of red light before Morgana heard someone next to her.

"Hey, girlie."

"Matt!"

"Share your friends, Ana. It's not nice to hog them all to yourself."

"Be my guest."

Matt took over the trickier Death Eater, leaving Morgana with the quicker one who had simpler spells.

"And Peter?" she asked, dread in her stomach as sweat formed on her brow.

"He's moving."

She sighed in relief and speeded up the duel, her feet never still as she rocked back and forth on her tiptoes; the small jumps reminded her of ballet classes when she was little. It was a constant dance.

"Give it up!" the Death Eater shouted. Morgana noticed the strain in the male's voice and she smiled a little.

"After you, sir!" she called, turning a duck into a bow.

"Move toward the school again," Matt said in a low voice to her.

"Are you sure that's wise?" she asked, a hint of a snarl in her voice as she continued to fight, another cut appearing on her face.

"If more show up, I want to be there."

"What about the kids?"

"We'll put more charms on the building. I think more of ours will be coming too, so-" he broke off and split away from her by several strides as if he had been pulled.

She backed up and side-stepped toward him, turning her back to the school. James was in the thick of things once more, fighting back-to-back with Sirius. Lily was dueling madly, her face splashed with blood. Remus and Chris were together next to the slowly stirring lump that was Peter while Allie held her own several yards away. She noticed a few other unmasked duelers, at least seven or eight more Death Eaters.

There was a huge flash of light and the ground shook as the air cracked behind Morgana. She was thrown to the ground, stunned momentarily. Flipping over and jumping up, her heart stopped.

There were more.

Death Eaters seemed to seep from the darkness, illuminated only by the flickering light that was a fire taking over half of the forest closest to Morgana. There was no way to get out. The entire mission had failed. They couldn't fight. They had lost.

"Morgana, run!" Matt shouted, pulling her by the hand. She could see the other Order members sprinting toward the church in the distance, away from the school, shooting spells over their shoulders. Morgana stunned the Death Eater she had been fighting and bolted after Matt, clutching to his hand for dear life.

"But the kids-!"

"We'd be killed just as easily as them! We'll get more back here as soon as we can! Run!"

She released his hand to throw hexes behind them. Morgana tore ahead until she was next to Sirius.

"All right?" Sirius asked her in a shout.

"Never better. You?"

"Fantastic."

In front of her, Lily was hit in the leg and fell, but James didn't miss a beat in hauling her off of the ground and dragging her forward. Two Order men with flaming red hair to Morgana's immediate left were running backwards and laughing with each other as they shot hexes. They appeared to be twins. Matt had moved ahead and was half-supporting, half-carrying Peter, slowing slightly. The church was very close now, mere seconds and they would be there…

Once Sirius and Morgana were in, Remus and James slammed the doors shut, sending pews to barricade them.

"The only way we can hope to get out of here is if we can sneak out into the forest and get past the anti-Apparation barrier. It's about twenty yards into the woods," Frank told them, climbing onto a radiator to peek out the window. He hopped down silently. "We're surrounded," he whispered, coming to the group.

"How many?" Morgana turned her eyes to one of the men who had been laughing. He was tall and skinny, handsome with red hair. The other man was next to him, clearly his twin.

"Too many. They're all here."

"Any chance we'd make it out?" Caradoc asked.

"Not without losing a few of us."

Morgana looked around the room. Lily and James stood across from her, clutching each others' hands. They were going to be married in a few months. Allie stood in between Chris and Benjy Fenwick, all with blank looks on their faces- Chris and Allie, the opposites who were hardly ever separated and Benjy, the cheery Hufflepuff who had walked next to Morgana at graduation. Peter was leaning against a pew, his mouth hanging open as he panted and wheezed. Caradoc Dearborn looked utterly desperate- had he even told Rosemerta that he was fighting tonight? Matt had one arm folded, his other fist at his lips. Was he thinking of how glad he was that Marlene had stayed at school? Frank had his arm around Alice and rested his cheek on her short hair: another wedding that might have to be cancelled. A stately looking woman in emerald green knotted her fingers into her blonde hair, sighing. The laughing twins both had the same look of determined thought, their brows furrowed deeply.

And then there was Sirius. Morgana felt his hand resting on the small of her back. It seemed that that spot was the only place in her body that had any feeling left in it. Twenty-four short hours ago she had been curled up in her bed sheets and sleeping next to him, perfectly and utterly happy. Now, both of them were covered in scratches and blood and bruises, huddled in a church with friends and complete strangers, surrounded by enemies on all sides. It seemed as if they had been on these grounds for years, but on the other hand, it felt like everything had gone by in a matter of seconds. Had Hogwarts really been just a few short months ago?

Hogwarts. Right now, there were students asleep in their beds, safe and untroubled. There was definitely a girl staying up to study or think of a boy- after all, another girl had certainly cried herself to sleep over the same one that night. There was probably a group of several of the older students sneaking around a common room setting up a prank as the Marauders had done, unaware that their heroes were crowded together, waiting to be attacked. There were sixth and seventh years thinking of the war and wishing they were there. Morgana would bet anything that Marlene was still brooding and planning how to get out while her brother and friends stood together, afraid of what would become of them all.

Alyssa Gardener and Quidditch and exams and teachers and homework and dating seemed so trivial now. School had been so safe that, looking back, it was hysterical. Even running with a werewolf once a month would have been welcomed now. It had been easy to brew potions in warm, comfy rooms and sneak around the school with friends in an Invisibility Cloak, now they would be-

"James, do you have the Cloak?" Morgana whispered suddenly, barely making a sound.

"Yeah, why?"

"What cloak?" one of the twins asked.

"Invisibility Cloak."

"Dumbledore lent us one from Mad-Eye Moody," the same twin murmured, shoving his hand into his robes and bringing out the silvery fabric. "He just got it."

"Chris, go see if there's an exit somewhere near the back, see if they have anyone out there," Morgana commanded. Chris ran off immediately. "This church is spectacularly old. My parents took me to one just like it when I was little. They showed us how it had these hidden doors leading outside. Maybe this one's like it too. How many will your cloak hold?" she added at the redhead.

"Four maybe, if we tried. Why?"

"We need to get everyone disillusioned and get them under the cloaks and to the old house. It's right next to the woods, they'll be fine once they get there and it'll save time rather than getting everyone to the barrier right away."

"That's great, but we won't all fit."

"If one person brings it back, yes we will."

"It'll take at least three trips."

"Peter and I can transform!" she said after a few moments. "We'll be small enough, there'll be plenty of room. We could each go with a cloak and bring it back for the next group. We should be able to make it in two trips. Even if our feet show, they'll be hard as hell to see since it's dark."

"That might work," the other twin said, nodding at her. "They're waiting for us to start the fight since they know there's no way we can win. They don't want to work any harder than they have to. We're their entertainment."

"Exactly! Who knows how to Disillusion?" she asked eagerly.

"What do you mean that you and Peter could transform, though?" Matt asked.

"Disillusion me and I'll show you."

Matt stepped forward and hit his wand on the top of her head. She felt a cool sensation drip down her and, once it made it to her feet, she transformed.

"It's illegal, McKinnon, don't kid yourself. Peter's a rat, too," Sirius explained.

"That's amazing… when did this even…?"

"A couple of years back. We were-"

"Guys, there's a door in back!" Chris mouthed, running in. "What now?"

Once the twins, the blonde woman, and Matt had disillusioned them all and Peter had transformed, they went to the back of the church, Lily, James, Sirius, and Morgana under James's cloak and Chris, Allie, Alice, Frank, and Peter the rat under the other.

"Come here, love," Sirius said, holding out his arms and bending over to pick up Morgana. "Don't want you getting under foot."

The door seemed to have been out of use for years, but Frank tapped the hinges with his wand to make sure they were silent. It was hidden by a large tree next to it, making it easy to slip out of.

Morgana, curled into Sirius's chest, peered over at the Death Eaters guarding the windows. They were unnervingly still, like statues.

"Almost there," Sirius breathed into her ear.

She felt a little relief when he made it inside the backdoor of the old house. Though they had been completely out of sight, she hated them being exposed like that. She hopped down from his arms and changed back again as the other group made it in.

"I'll be right back," she said, pulling the cloak around her like a blanket.

"You'd better be," Sirius growled, kissing her cheek.

The cloak flowed out behind her when she reached the night air. It was incredibly hard to see where the door was in the dark; it blended in perfectly with the wall.

"Peter, go with Matt, Remus, and…" Morgana trailed off, looking at the blonde woman.

"Emmeline. Emmeline Vance."

"Right, take Emmeline as well. Caradoc and… you two can take this one with me."

"I'm Gideon," the twin closest to her said, offering his hand.

"Fabian Prewett, older of the Prewett twins," the other said, taking Morgana's hand and grinning at his brother.

"Morgana le Fay."

"Just remember, Miss le Fay, that Gideon's the better looking one. G for gorgeous."

"And the one who has to work on getting a grip on reality," Fabian chortled quietly.

"Guys, I'm all for making new friends, but let's get out of here. I've got some statues floating over there to trick them but…"

"Right-o, Mr. Dearborn. Do you want one of us to carry you?" Gideon directed at Morgana.

"Only if you don't think you can get there quickly without tripping on me," she whispered before transforming. Gideon held out his arms and Morgana hopped up, allowing him to tuck her under his arm.

"On we go, gentlemen and ladies."

Morgana looked over at the Death Eaters once more. There were only three at the side of the building, six missing. Maybe they had rearranged to attack the church…

"They must have gone in a bit more," Gideon breathed once they entered the house, dropping Morgana so she could transform under the cloak.

"Something's wrong. Sirius would wait here for me…" Her heart raced and she felt sick.

Next to them, Peter emerged from the cloak. The room exploded in movement. Morgana's mouth opened to scream, but Caradoc covered it with his hand and dragged the four of them back to the wall. In a matter of moments, Peter, Remus, Emmeline, and Matt were bound and gagged, a thin Death Eater holding their wands.

"Come out, come out wherever you are!" she cooed, circling the room, her bone mask glinting in the rays of moonlight that leaked through the gaps in the boarded windows. Her teeth shone like the mask and her pale skin was only a few shades darker, making her look completely like a skull. "Ollie, ollie oxen free!" Her heeled boots clicked their way to the door and she locked it, grinning.

"Maybe they made it out and are-" a deep voice began in the background, but she cut him off.

"Don't be a fool, Travers! Of course they're in here! Our friends are just a little shy," she added sweetly, turning her back to the four Order members under the cloak. "Aren't you, sweeties?"

Caradoc moved his foot slightly as a Death Eater passed him. The old floor instantly gave a loud creak and the cloak flew off before Morgana had even realized what had happened. The men were petrified immediately

"Four new friends! And one little girl to three little boys- naughty, naughty little… oh, is it who I think it is? Dear cousin's little whore?"

Morgana's blood boiled as looked at the Death Eater. "Bella… long time, no see," she said coolly, trying to inch her hand to the back of her jeans where her wand was tucked. She was debating- to attack would mean to be disarmed almost immediately. Not to would mean…

"Boys, have you met Morgana le Fay? This is what caught cousin's eye…" she added in a disgusted tone. Bellatrix wrapped her arm around Morgana as if they were old friends, her nails digging into Morgana's shoulder while three others tied up Caradoc, Fabian, and Gideon. The Death Eater tilted Morgana's arm forward, making sure she couldn't reach her wand. "Hands were I can see, darling.

"He wanted this little string bean? She's not worthy of a pureblood," one laughed.

"Oh no, Little Miss is of excellent blood status- direct descendant of the Morgana le Fay. What a terrible waste."

"I could take you one-on-one any day, Bella."

"She is a jokester, isn't she?" Bellatrix screeched, pinching her cheek.

"One of my vast genetic traits."

"Enough, chit-chat. I'm being a terrible hostess. We'll have some very important guests arriving and I'm sure that all of you would like to see your friends. Miss le Fay seems terrible under-accessorized, though. Cousin Bella will take care of that." Ropes tied her hands and feet together, a scarf wrapped covered Morgana's mouth; Bellatrix sneered before waving her wand at Morgana. She flew up the stairs and landed hard on the floor, winded and feeling her left shoulder crunch sickeningly, causing her to bite down on the scarf, tears in her eyes as a sob escaped her. She saw stars and turned her head when she heard scuffling. Sirius was struggling with his Death Eater to get over to her. He, too, was bound and gagged. Morgana seemed to be in the middle of the circle. Sirius caught her gaze and gave her a determined look as the others flew into the room from downstairs, the candlelight flickering.

"Oh no, you don't!" Bellatrix growled, yanking Morgana across the room, as far from Sirius as possible, between Fabian and Caradoc. "You can't sit next to your boyfriend! And no lovey-dovey eyes- there'll be no happily-ever-afters tonight. Now, where's your wand? Don't make my friends do a cavity search…"

Bellatrix moved Morgana slightly to expose the back of her jeans. Once the wand was gone from her belt, she felt utterly powerless. They would never get out of this one…

"Let's pass the time with a little game, shall we? How about Duck, Duck, Goose, hm? Yes, that sounds like fun," she cooed. "Lucius, would you like to be It?"

"I'm afraid, Bella, that I would pick entirely the wrong person. If you want something done right, do it yourself," said a cool voice to Morgana's immediate right.

"Ah, but which little one to choose? I always have been indecisive, haven't I, dear cousin?" she directed at Sirius. "Oh, but remember all the fun games we used to play? You never seemed to like them much- always crying like a little girl when I played with you. Regulus was always a much better sport… and he still is."

Sirius looked ready to kill her and struggled at his bonds. Morgana's heart thudded at the mention of Regulus and she silently urged Sirius to look at her and calm. His gaze never left his cousin.

"You always used to fight the muggle way- that's what really brought you down. You punched and kicked when you could have just let your anger do the work- you were young, you had no control over your magic yet. But, no. Then Andromeda poisoned and coddled you and you kept fighting like the muggles you so love and adore. Mudbloods too, you seem to have a fondness for. I wonder if Miss le Fay is really the only little girl in this room who's kept you company at night…"

Now James struggled on the floor, staring at Bellatrix with as much hate as Morgana.

"Enough, Bella," an inhuman voice said from the doorway. Morgana craned her neck slightly to see a translucent face (if you could call it that) with gleaming red eyes. There was no nose and thin lips curled back to reveal gleaming teeth as a snake slithered from behind the figure's bare feet. Bellatrix immediately fell to them as Morgana felt something rise in her throat. "Anger will cloud their judgment."

"My Lord…"

"Get up," he commanded, pushing her away with his foot. Morgana's blood ran cold as Voldemort stepped into the room. "Fourteen members of the Order of the Phoenix against my forty-three Death Eaters… I don't know whether that says more for my side or for Dumbledore's." He looked around the room, meeting the eyes of each Order member. "Either way, he will be fourteen short after tonight.

"My Death Eaters have told me that, while your plan was worthless, your fighting was extraordinary. Am I correct in saying also that nine of you are recent graduates as well? Now that… is admirable. But Lord Voldemort does not come tonight to shower you with praises. No... I come to you to offer most generously a glorious opportunity.

"I am looking for witches and wizards of your caliber. Brave, loyal, intelligent… I will win this. It would do you all a great deal of good to realize that now. The less magical blood that is spilled… the better it will be for us all. You will join or you will die- hardly a choice if you possess a brain."

He was met by fourteen glares.

"Red hair, green eyes… you must be Lily Evans. Yes, Lord Voldemort has heard your name."

Lily's eyes widened for a second before her expression turned stony once more. Voldemort stroked her cheek and the gag disappeared, revealing Lily's mouth, twisted in disgust.

"You fought very well, I see from the minds of my followers. Four to your one for an astonishing amount of time… Your parents must be remarkable."

"She's a Mudblood, My Lord. Not a drop in her veins," Bellatrix hissed. Voldemort retracted his hand slightly, fingers quickly curling down one by one.

"Are we really sure of this? If we were to test her…" he murmured, pondering.

"Don't waste your time. There is nothing that would make me consider joining the likes of you," she spat.

"There is magic in this world, magic that I know, that would make you change your mind. I could rip that opposition right out of your head."

"Then. Do. It," she snarled in his face, calling his bluff. Voldemort smirked and stood, drawing his wand.

"Try it, you coward, and I'll make you wish you'd never been born," James growled, his gag hanging around his neck. Voldemort turned to face him.

"And you are…?"

"James Potter: pureblood and unworthy of the dirt on Lily Evans's muggle-born feet."

"Well, James, what do you say? Make the proper friends, accept my offer..."

"Oh, yeah, definitely. You'll just have to wait until Tuesday though. I'm expecting a shipment of pigs to fly out of my arse and I really don't want to make new friends until I can offer them some fine pork-based products. Do excuse, you pile of dung," he added, mumbling the last bit under his breath.

"This isn't a game."

"Really, because I was on the Quidditch team for a couple of years and we talked a lot about winners and losers. Mind you, we didn't kill and torture innocents, but, hey, we all have our quirks."

"Enough!" He flicked his wand and a stronger-looking gag appeared on James. "Next?" Frank and Alice just stared at him once they were able to talk. Their eyes were unquestionable. "Very well, then… You."

Sirius.

"This is my cousin, My Lord. I've told you of him. His girlfriend's the little brunette by the door… if that would be of any use…" Bellatrix hissed rapidly, smirking.

"It may, Bella…" he said softly, turning to face Morgana. "This one? Hm…"

"Morgana le Fay. She said she'd be an Auror once they won."

"Never, then. Well…" Voldemort freed Sirius's mouth and flicked his wand, dragging Morgana to the middle of the circle. Sirius watched her move across the wood, his mouth in a tight line. "And you claim to care for her?" Voldemort asked. Sirius continued to silently look on. "You realize, of course, that being the most powerful wizard in the world, I will either make or take your life. And the lives of the ones you love…" He turned and looked down at Morgana, tilting his head to the side like a mildly interested child. "You see, I could make any one of you experience some of the worst pain imaginable. Favoring that shoulder?" he added to Morgana. He brought his wand down in a sweeping motion and Morgana curled up, her shoulder crunching and crumpling like a paper bag as her ropes and gag disappeared. Her robes hung loose in a sickening dent around her shoulder as the bones splintered and seemed to turn to powder in her body. She screamed in pain, her forehead pressed to the ground, chin tucked into her knees. Tears mingled with dust on the floor as she moaned and cried, Sirius's face rivaling the agony in her own, shouting in protest. He was silenced quickly.

"Tell him to join me…" Voldemort hissed in Morgana's head. "Tell him that it's the only way. If he saves himself, he'll convince the others to do the same. Tell him that it hurts too much not to. Say 'If you love me…'"

Morgana tried to fight the urge to move her mouth, but she was too weak, and the floating fog was too easy to slip into.

"Sirius… you have to join. It's the only way we can be together…" her voice croaked desperately. Sirius's eyes widened. "It would be so much easier."

"You don't want that," he said softly.

"I don't want it to hurt anymore. We have to."

"Ana?" Lily whimpered, panicky.

"It's not her. He's making her say it," Sirius whispered, his eyes never leaving her as she stared at him, pleading.

"Please, Sirius… Just do it. If you love me, you'll do this."

"Stop," he murmured.

"We could have a family, a life. It would only be hard for a little while. Just a little while and we could… we could be happy… Please…"

"No! Shut it!" he roared suddenly. Several Death Eaters were startled and Morgana stirred, fighting the curse.

"Stop it…" she muttered groggily. "Shut up…"

"Morgana?" Sirius said, a little more hopeful.

"Get the hell out of my head, Noseless Wonder," she growled, her voice laced with pain as she tried to sit up, failing and falling back to the ground, panting and crying.

"Your resistance will be his pain, then," Voldemort said, taking Sirius from the circle and to the center. He moved Morgana just out of reach, inside the circle, but too far from the center to touch Sirius.

Morgana began to plead in agony, "No. No, please!" She tried to get up again, but was pushed down by the Death Eater nearest to her.

Sirius' gag disappeared and he spat at Voldemort's feet as the Dark Wizard raised his wand. Sirius grew still. His lips moved, but no sound came out, as if he were in a trance. Suddenly, he snapped his head back.

"What the hell! I've got enough voices in there without yours. My lord you're annoying! Honestly, no wonder no one likes you. Cut it out. You just made Morgana say the exact same thing! Get some origi-" he exclaimed before Voldemort swished his wand, cutting him off.

"You dare tell me?"

"People are not disposable. They were born and they're living and trying to continue with their lives. What in the world gives you the right to stop them from making mistakes and getting mad at people and uprooting the world? You don't get to take them off of this Earth. You haven't earned that," Sirius said quickly. He had to buy them time and pray that James or one of the others had a plan.

"You fool! You could have thrived in our new world! You would have been powerful and had all you desired, yet the old man has tainted your mind. What a waste. Your life for his spineless ideas!"

Sirius looked over at Morgana, her face contorted in pain from her shoulder. He could tell that she could hardly move and that her shivering caused her even more agony, yet she managed a tiny trace of a smile for him.

'It's all right, sweetheart,' she tried to tell him. 'It'll be over soon, whether they find us or not. At least we tried.' Somehow, she knew he understood her perfectly.

"Crucio!" Voldemort hissed causing Sirius to writhe on the ground, crying out in pain. When Voldemort repeated the curse, Sirius was prepared and remained quiet, though the curse was more intense. He felt his cheek bleed as he accidentally bit down on it and heard Morgana protesting and crying and the others scuffling, but they were silenced quickly enough.

Sirius knew what would happen. He would be tortured a while longer and then killed. Voldemort would tell the others to look at Morgana's pain, maybe even James', and see the misery which could be caused. Morgana, no doubt, would be in the greatest agony and Voldemort might even kill her, either to prove a point or make himself seem merciful by putting her out of her misery. Sirius could handle his death, but not hers.

So, he decided to continue his defiance and buy them all time by remaining silent, concentrating even harder now. He found it easier when he thought of his friends rather than himself, he could control himself better by thinking, 'Do this for James. Do this for Remus. Peter. Lily. Morgana.'

After either a few minutes or a few years of torture (though, admittedly, the latter seemed more accurate), Voldemort stopped and raised his wand.

"Final words, Sirius Black?"

He struggled to breathe for several moments before he took a final look at Morgana, her pretty face pale and covered in tears.

"Morgana… beautiful… I'm so sorry, but I'd rather be a martyr than a murderer."

"No, Sirius," she whispered. "No… NO!" she screamed, standing up like lightning and throwing herself over Sirius before the Death Eaters could even react.

At the same instant, James had pushed himself into Voldemort, sending the killing curse into the wall as the dark wizard shot a different curse at Sirius. Instead, Morgana was flung head first into the opposite wall where she slid to the floor and moved no more.

"Morgana, no!" Sirius howled, staring horrified at her completely still form. "Help her! Let me go! Untie me!"

"Enough! Lucius, keep a better eye on Potter! As for you, Black, I want you to watch her life slip away," Voldemort shrieked, sending Sirius to Morgana and walking up to the two of them. "I want you to watch the blood seep from her and know that, each moment, as her heart tries so valiantly to keep her alive, it will only kill her that much quicker. Watch her fade away into nothingness as the blood leaves her body through that gash in her pretty little skull. How much longer does she have, Black? Two minutes? One? Perhaps only moments? Or maybe, she's already gone and she bleeds only because the traitorous blood has nowhere else to go... All of this because you refuse."

Voldemort's inhuman voice was only distant background noise, just like Bellatrix's whispers or the occasional scuff of a tennis shoe on the wood floor or a faint sob. He heard nothing but the space which was supposed to be filled by Morgana- her voice, her laugh, her cry, her heartbeat. The silence was deafening and he felt as if he would go mad.

"Morgana, wake up! Come on, you can't let him win! Wake up, you're okay! Wake up! Wakeupwakeupwakeupwakeup!" he whispered to her.

"I've already won, Black. If you decide quickly, I could spare your life and, if you beg, hers. Just think: she could live with you. You two could get married and live in a world where you don't have to run from me- you'd be with me. If you wished, she could even give you children and never have to battle. After all, those children would be the future of our race; they would be her contribution. You have to choose quickly. Her life and their lives are slipping away, all by your hand."

"They slip away by your hand, Tom," a new voice said. Dumbledore stepped into the candlelight. "You couldn't save her if you wanted to."

The ropes holding the Order members vanished and their wands flew to them. Immediately, the battle began again. The room erupted in light.

Sirius slipped between Voldemort's feet as he began to battle Dumbledore. Gently, Sirius cradled Morgana in his arms, trying to heal her head. He stopped the bleeding first and then healed the wound. Praying and kissing her blood soaked hair.

"Please, not her. She can't die. Morgana, you heard me: he doesn't get you. He doesn't get to take your life. Prove him wrong!"

His fingers pressed her neck and desperately searched for a pulse. He moved to her wrists and found nothing. Frantically, he pressed his ear to her chest, but her constant heartbeat was silent.

"Ennervate! Ennervate!"

Nothing changed. She was still silent, motionless, lifeless.

Morgana was dead.

He hugged her tightly, screaming into her neck. She was young, happy; she had laughed a few hours ago; she was all around him- her smell, her hair, her blood, her skin- and yet she had never been farther away. Old, sad, sick people were supposed to die- not her, not Morgana.

"Take me instead, I'll do anything. Anything. It's not her time."

Nothing made sense. His voice was shouting and then whispering. Somehow, he was talking without trying to. The grief was unbearable.

"Little miss bumped her head and couldn't get up in the morning…" Bellatrix sang behind him.

Temporarily, rage replaced the grief and forced him to gently rest Morgana on the floor, kissing her hand. He rose slowly and turned to face his cousin.

"That spell was meant for me!"

"Don't worry, cousin, you'll see her soon."

They began to duel fiercely. Sirius had never dueled so hard in his life and he could tell he was making Bellatrix sweat. She led him down the stairs and out to the woods, her feet never stopping their dance, but he was out for blood.

"It's either you or me, Bella!" he shouted. "One of us isn't making it out of this alive!"

"What do you have left? Her funeral? There's nothing to keep you alive!" she shrieked.

Shocked, he stopped for a fraction of a moment- long enough for Bellatrix to slip into the shadows and lose her cousin. "Get back here, coward!" he screamed, running after her. "Nox," he whispered, not wanting Bellatrix to track the light of his wand. Blind, he sprinted through the woods, taking turns whenever he heard a twig snap. His heart began to pound; he could feel that he had lost her. Disoriented by the screams in the distance and the surrounding dark, broken only by the shards of stars above him, he called out, "Come on, Bella! Show yourself!"

"I know where you are. It's not my fault you lost me," she hissed, her voice all around him.

"Where am I, then? Huh? Where am I, you bitch?"

A small rock sharply hit him in the back of the head.

"Lumos!" he shouted and whirled around but was startled by an earsplitting crack. Something huge forced him to the ground and pinned him down, crushing his entire left side. Crying in pain, he pounded on the weight, feeling the rough bark of the tree.

"I suppose you'll be seeing your precious Morgana in hell soon, cousin," Bellatrix cackled, coming into view. "I send my love."

She left him and he tried to scream, but it was to no avail. He vaguely understood that his left lung had collapsed and he would die soon, a small comfort since the pain was excruciating.

But he didn't want to die like this! Every instinct was telling him to try to save himself, even if it meant living while Morgana was dead. She wouldn't want this- she wanted him to live.

So he pushed at the tree for Morgana with all his might, though it didn't move an inch and only hurt him more. His wand had flown a few feet from him, the light still pointing in the direction Bellatrix had gone.

"Help me, Morgana… Help…" he panted, tears pouring down his face. "God, please… save me, love."

He opened his eyes and felt the ground with his right hand, grabbing a thin branch about the length from Sirius to the wand. He scraped it toward the wand, just barely out of reach. He stretched farther and farther, whimpering and swearing as the pain intensified. He dropped his arm and gave up, allowing his eyes to close.

'I'm so sorry, love. I can't do it. It hurts too much.'

'Please, Sirius. You can do it!' he imagined her encouraging words. He could see her sitting on the tree which pinned him down, her hair flowing down her back, bare legs glowing in the faint light from his wand. Her expression was desperate, pleading as she wrung the skirt of her cream dress in anxiety in one hand, the other barely brushing his cheek.

'It's too much.'

Her face turned deadly and her eyes flamed in rage. 'Oh, really? Maybe it was too much for me. You don't think it hurt when he shattered my shoulder? When my bones turned to dust and splinters? I was tortured, I was Imperiused, and I still managed to get up and save you, Sirius. With the last bit of strength I had and the knowledge that it would kill me to get up, I gave my life for you!'

'You were always stronger than me.'

Morgana fell to her knees, enraged and nearing hysterics as she exclaimed in his face, 'That's it, then? I die so you can go and die ten minutes later yourself? How dare you give up like that! Throw away my life and yours because of pain? I hurt, too! How can you let this happen?'

'I can't move! I can't breathe!'

'I can't either anymore!' she screamed, full of agony. She backed away from him and he immediately missed her warmth and wished she would come back. Her voice was hard and disappointed. 'I guess you're not who I thought you are. I guess you're not the man I love, then. He wouldn't let me die for nothing.'

He screwed up his face, ashamed. Was it only his imagination, or was she really talking to him? Regardless, his eyes snapped open and he took the branch, quickly hitting the wand with it, shrieking in the instant pain, and then dragging it toward him. Within a few minutes, the wand was in reach, but things were becoming blacker and blacker, he was losing consciousness and it wouldn't be sleep he would fall into. His heart beat faster and faster until it became painful. The wand was cool in his hand as he pointed it at a rock. "Portus." The rock glowed briefly before he gripped it along with his wand, waiting. The blankness pressed harder and harder until the pressure was as great as the tree's. Then, he could fight no longer.

OxO

The Healers wheeled Sirius through a pure white hallway and into a small room, three of them casting spells on his chest at the same time.

"He's going into cardiac arrest, quick!" one ordered, tearing his shirt open.

"If we don't get that lung fixed, it won't do any good."

"A lung's not going to be of any help if he's dead! Regulate the beat now!" the first woman commanded, pressing Sirius' shoulders into the gurney. "Go."

The second Healer firmly pressed his wand above Sirius' heart, murmuring a spell and causing his patient to convulse violently for several seconds before relaxing. "Beat's stable."

"Good. Now you can fix the damn lung. Someone try to track down a family member."

"His wallet says his name is Sirius Black," a younger Healer informed her.

"Check his records and get in contact with someone."

"Healer Fern?" another Healer asked, poking his head into the room. "The lobby's loaded with injuries who just came in. We need you."

"How many?"

"Nine or ten, at least. I didn't get a good count."

"Merlin," Healer Fern muttered, running out to the lobby. A group of young witches and wizards were huddled together, examining each others' injuries and hugging each other. "Okay, who's in worse shape here?" she called over their voices. Her team quickly tended to the people the group pointed out. "We can take care of the rest of you one at a time, but-"

"Please, we're looking for two of our friends!" a young, red-haired woman said frantically. "Allie Etherson and Sirius Black. They're our age. Allie is-"

"We've just had a Sirius Black come in, but there haven't been any young women in for at least an hour."

"Is he okay? Oh, God, where's Allie?"

"What the hell happened to him? His arms and legs are crushed, he's got a collapsed lung, went into cardiac arrest…"

The woman was taken away to have a gash healed on her head and Healer Fern went back to see about Sirius.

"He was awake for a few seconds and said 'Morgana.' Is there a woman with that name out there?" a Healer asked, running her wand along Sirius' ribs.

"Not that I know of., but there were four women out there- one of them could be her. We'll let them get everyone patched up first. He won't know the difference anyway," Fern sighed, nodding to the unconscious Sirius. She drifted from the room, back to the lobby where the receptionist was rubbing her eyes and sorting out paperwork, a pile for each of the new patients and then flicking her wand, sending one to each room.

"Where'd all these kids come from? Are they even old enough to be out of school yet?" the receptionist asked.

"Haven't a clue. The first boy who came in… half the bones in his body are splinters. What was going on?"

"Could they be fr-?" Fern was cut off as a quiet pop echoed in the now-silent lobby. Albus Dumbledore held a brunette girl in his arms. She was covered in blood and didn't appear to be breathing.

"Ah, Abbey Fern. This is Morgana le Fay. I managed to get her heart a bit steadier, but it's far too weak. You may need to look at her head, as well, and her shoulder's a mess," he said calmly, conjuring a gurney and setting Morgana on it.

Fern sprinted off, wheeling her down the hall, summoning others as she went. She set about to examining Morgana's head while the others stabilized her heart and tried to fix her shoulder.

"We'll need to regrow her scapula. The muscles are torn, so we'll heal them and might have to be in a sling for a day or two. How's her head?"

"No more bleeding. Whoever healed her up did it properly. She lost a lot of blood, though. Her heart?"

"Getting there, slowly but surely. Let's get a few more units in her to give her heart something to pump, though."

"Is she with the others who came in?"

"Well, that Sirius was asking for someone named Morgana and they know Sirius, so I'd imagine," Fern explained.

"There's a man in the room next door who only had to get a few cuts and bruises healed- should I ask him about her?"

"Yeah, why not. If he wants, he can hold her hand- poor thing'll probably need it."

The young girl left and returned a few minutes later after Morgana was finally healed, still unconscious. A tall, handsome young man with brown hair walked in, eyes wide at the sight of the woman in the bed.

"Is she…?"

"She's alive."

He ran to her bedside and grabbed her hand in both of his, holding it to his heart. "Morgana… God, you gave us a scare! It's Matt, girlie. I'm here. I'm sure you'll see Sirius, too," he whispered to her sleeping form. Gently, he brushed the hair from her face and conjured a cloth and bowl of water to wipe the blood from her face, whispering his relief to her. Once her face was clean, he turned to the Healers. "Thank you so much. I can't… honestly… We'd be lost without her."

"Let her rest, keep things quiet," Fern instructed.

"Is there any way we could get her transferred to Sirius Black's room? She nearly died for him and… I mean, he's her boyfriend and all. They were sweethearts at Hogwarts. They live together. They're hardly ever apart. They're-"

"Once he's stable, we'll move her in, okay?" Fern cut him off, looking both annoyed and amused at his care for the girl.

"She'll be okay, though? You fixed her shoulder, right? I know she lost a lot of blood- is that a transfusion you're doing? Do you need more blood? We might be the same-"

"I think so, yes, yes, and no, we've got enough. I'm going to go check on Sirius' progress now, if you'll excuse me," she said, shutting the door behind her, leaving Matt alone with the sleeping Morgana.

"Sirius is going to be so unbelievably happy when he finds out you're alive- just like I am. I didn't know what I was going to do without you, girlie. You're…" his voice faded away as he realized how relieved he really was. "I won't leave you, don't worry. You're safe now, Dumbledore saw to that. Thank God for him."

Two hours passed as Matt watched the blood flow to Morgana's vein extremely slowly before he heard footsteps hurrying to the door which clicked open several seconds later.

"Matt? Were they telling the truth? Is she… Oh my God…" Lily breathed, frantically limping to the side of the bed. "They won't let any visitors in for Sirius yet but they told me… She's alive?"

"Yes. They think she'll be just fine. They have to run a transfusion and her shoulder is being regrown."

"And her head? She had to hit it pretty hard."

"I've told you all they've told me."

"Poor dear," Lily cooed, sitting on the edge of her bed and stroking Morgana's hair. Lily bent down and kissed her hair gently. Matt still refused to release her hand.

"How're the others?"

"James is better, Remus is worse than him, they're still working on Peter, Frank and Alice and Emmeline and the Prewetts are talking to Dumbledore, and Caradoc's trying to keep Chris from going too mad. If we don't leave soon, they'll have to sedate her."

"Still no Allie? I'm sorry," he added quickly, noting Lily's expression.

"So much went wrong tonight. I… I don't even know if we saved those kids or not. We can't lose anyone, Matt."

"We'll find her. We got Morgana back and it was Voldemort who nearly killed her- anything's possible."

"But every moment it becomes even more improbable. They're going to get search parties together soon, but so many of the rest of the Order went up to the school… It's just us to find her until they get back and everyone's so beat up. No one's been released yet, the parents don't know…"

"I'll help. Someone should stay with Morgana and Sirius, though. I've no idea when either will wake up and I don't want anything to happen. Someone'll need to explain things to them."

"Let that be Remus. He has to stay behind because of injuries and he'd be too impulsive to find Allie. You know how much he…"

Matt winced and looked back down at Morgana. "I know exactly."

Lily smiled. "Morgana knows, too. She'll understand."

Matt looked up just as Healer Fern appeared at the door again. "We've finished treating Sirius. He's still asleep, but we can transfer Morgana to his room if that would be easier for them and you lot."

"Yeah, definitely," Matt said as Morgana's bed began to wheel into the hall and into Sirius' room.

"Any idea when he'll be awake?" Lily asked.

"He's got a lot of potion in him to keep the pain down, so he won't be completely coherent, but he should be awake pretty quick here."

"And Morgana?"

"Well, I've had Skele-Grow before and… unless she's really out, she'll be awake when that kicks in. That won't be long either."

Matt made a disgusted expression. "That stuff's brutal for a while. Mar accidentally vanished all the bones in my foot when we were little."

"When she comes to, try to make sure she doesn't move much until a Healer sees her."

"Clearly you haven't met Morgana," Matt smiled. "The moment she finds out Sirius is hurt, she'll be fixing him."

"Keep her from it."

They entered Sirius' room and Fern closed the door behind the two. Sirius was in a bed on the far side of the room, Morgana's about five feet away. His face was bruised and cut and half of his body appeared to be bandaged. His chest rose and fell rapidly and his face held an expression of discomfort.

"Oh, Sir," Lily whispered, taking his uninjured hand. "Morgana's going to have a field day when she sees you. She gets to play doctor."

"And the Healer thinks we'll be able to restrain her. Yeah, if she's in a coma for the rest of her days," Matt snorted, causing Lily to smile. "And then there'll be her conflict of wanting to baby Sirius while simultaneously finding Allie."

"Perhaps the solution would be to tote him around as a dog in one of those cute carrier bags."

"Oh, most assuredly," he replied immediately; Lily laughed a little, but he grew serious. "I don't think the rest of us should know about the Animagi. You guys and the Marauders- cool. But I think we need to keep that on a minimum."

"You're probably right. I thought about that myself."

"It's just not ideal. I mean, if someone were to be captured or let it slip to someone else…" He sat back in his chair, watching Morgana, a small smile on his face. "I sort of like thinking of her like that, though. It was a shock. It just… It's this new part of her- I mean, what else don't I know, huh?" he chuckled.

"Well, we could let you keep that if we modified the rest of the memory, I suppose," Lily said knowingly, tugging the sheet up to Morgana's chin.

"You think?"

Lily just gave him a small smile before saying, "She's moving a bit. She'll be up soon."

Morgana's hand slowly crept up to her injured shoulder and she made whimpering noises in her throat.

"Lily, turn the lights down. She'll open her eyes easier, then."

Lily dimmed the lights and then took her place back at the edge of Morgana's bed, holding her hand comfortingly as Morgana began to stir. Her head slowly tilted from side to side, her face screwing up in pain.

"Morgana? Morgana? Sweetheart, it's Lily. Can you hear me? Are you awake?"

"Lils? Wh…"

"Dumbledore brought you in- he saved you. You nearly died, but you'll be fine. You're at St. Mungo's. They've been healing you. You're getting better with blood transfusions, but your bones have to be regrown in your shoulder."

"Which explains the burny, stabby, achy pain in my shoulder…" she grumbled, mumbling something incoherent before her eyes snapped open. "Sirius?"

Lily tilted her head and Morgana looked to the right, sighing in relief. "He'll be okay after a bit of recovery. A whole bunch of his bones were pulverized, but those will heal."

"What happened?" she asked, sitting up quickly and wincing, closing her eyes. "Ugh, my head…"

"Well, dear, you did hit it rather hard."

Morgana turned green and pointed to the floor by the table. Without missing a beat, Matt gave her the trash bin and she vomited in it before falling back onto the pillows.

"I'll get a Healer," Lily soothed before running from the room. Matt replaced her at Morgana's side.

"Close your eyes, relax, Sirius is fine. No one knows what really happened to him. He should be awake soon."

"And the others?"

"Fine, they're fine."

"Matt."

"Honestly."

"Matthew McKinnon," she warned, sensing his tone.

"Morgana Caroline Antoinette Harmons le Fay," he said in the same tone. Morgana rolled her eyes, knowing he was trying to drop the subject. "Don't upset yourself or you'll hurl again. Everyone's alive to my knowledge."

She gritted her teeth and growled, "And how far's that go? Exactly how knowledgeable are you? Shock me."

"Cálmate por favor!I'm bilingual- how's that for shocking knowledge?" he said, trying to change the subject.

"Español? Seriamente? Quizas alemán o francés próximo, muchacho. Puedo correr círculos alrededor a ti en cualquier idioma!"

"Erm… Ganas."

"Of course, I win. Mum worked in International Cooperation, I was multilingual before Hogwarts," she sighed. "I'm sorry, Matt. I shouldn't be so short with you."

"The only person you wouldn't be short with would be five or a house elf," he snorted.

"I walked into that one, didn't I? Here we go again," she grumbled, grabbing the bin and getting sick again. After a few seconds of panting, she lowered it and rested again. "Help me up?" she asked, reaching for Matt.

"No way. You stay right there."

"I want to see Sirius."

"Look. Right there. No need to play Mum to everyone who's ill."

"I don't play Mum to everyone who's ill!"

"Like hell you don't. You'll be a Healer, not an Auror, I can see it now. Cool it."

"I need to help."

"I know you've a need to play Healer. Relax or I'll poke your shoulder and you don't want that."

"Matt! Let me up!" she said angrily.

"What's going on?" Healer Fern had entered again. "You'll need to calm down, dear, or you'll get hurt. Let me look you over."

Morgana threw a glare at Matt as he gave her an I-told-you-so look.

"Your vomiting is probably from the combination of potions. It's not unusual, especially after your blood loss."

"Is it normal for her to be speaking in tongues after hitting her head?" Matt asked, a bit of a snap in his voice.

"Depends on where she was hit. Is it gibberish?"

"Spanish mixed with an irritable dialect, I'd reckon, but I'm no linguist."

"I am not irritable!" she said indignantly.

"Could've fooled me."

"I think," Fern began loudly, quieting the others, "that everyone is under quite a bit of pressure here and needs to have a bit more patience with each other. Miss le Fay, would you please stop turning your head when I'm examining your eyes! Here, drink this. It'll make the vomiting subside a little, but you might become drowsy. I'll let you sit up, then."

"Sirius is starting to wake up," Matt noticed, resting a hand on his shoulder. "Probably all the noise. You alright, mate?"

Sirius groaned and swore under his breath. "Jeez, what the hell happened to me…? Did I lose a bet with Hagrid?"

"We're not sure, but you broke half of your bones," Matt told him.

"Hmm? Oh… right… Oh…" he whispered, remembering. He shut his eyes and covered his face with his good arm. "She's dead… It's all my fault. It should've been me."

Matt exhaled in a whistle and made a well, yeah expression before speaking. "You're talking about Morgana being all… dead and corpse-y, right? Yeah, that was a bit of a downer. On the plus side, dead and corpse-y just isn't what it was a few years ago. They don't seem to kill them like they used to, wouldn't you say?" he asked, turning around and no longer blocking Sirius' sight. His eyes widened when he saw the bed next to him.

"Nauseous is the new lifeless, I hear tell," Morgana joked before looking at Sirius, no longer angry. "And apparently you would make one God-awful coroner, Sir."

"I… I'm dead. You died and you're here which means…" he tried to reason.

"Correct. Well, except for the fact that I didn't die and neither did you, yeah. I certainly hope we didn't all die, because I still feel like utter crap."

"But… your heart was stopped."

Fern shook her head. "She just lost a lot of blood. Dumbledore dropped her off and said that her heartbeat was very weak, but he managed to get her strong enough to travel. Even when he brought her here, it was quiet. You wouldn't have been able to find the beat."

"Turns out, a brush with death makes our young Morgana ever so snarky," Matt said, sitting down in a chair between the two beds.

"Perhaps some of Death's biting wit rubbed off on me during our brief glimpse of one another."

"And what did he have to say to you?"

"Matt, stop distracting me. What happened, Sirius?"

Healer Fern began to examine his eyes and mouth as he said simply, "I chased Bella and a tree fell on top of me."

"A tree?" the four said in unison.

"I'm not so sure that its bark was worse than its bite."

"Well, you seem to be doing incredibly well considering all that. If you need anything else, just call," Fern said, bowing out.

"How are the others?" Sirius asked once she had closed the door. "Is everyone okay?"

"Everyone's alive," Matt repeated, much to Morgana's annoyance.

"Lily?" Sirius asked, turning his gaze to the redhead.

"Well… Allie hasn't come back yet," Lily said quietly.

"What?" Morgana and Sirius said in unison.

"This is why we kept quiet. You two need to relax!" she said, anxious. Morgana and Sirius just stared at her, waiting for an explanation. "Look, no one's been able to be officially released yet, so we can't go out. Not that we'd be all that much good- ten injured people out there without a clue as to where she is. All we know is that the rest of the Order showed up at the boarding school just after we left- Dumbledore came in and told me when he dropped you off, Ana. He said the Death Eaters were retreating but he didn't say anything about the kids or Allie… I told him she hadn't shown up yet. He said that he'd check around and would call in people to help him look at the boarding school."

"It's been hours," Morgana said breathlessly.

"I know. I've argued with the Healers but…"

"How are you here, then? Aren't you supposed to be in your room if you're still a patient?"

"Well, I shouted at the receptionist and she's working on the paperwork to get Matt, Chris, Emmeline, Caradoc, the Prewetts, Frank, Alice, Benjy, James, and me released. Remus isn't supposed to be walking, but he is. Peter's supposed to be resting, but he's not. You're supposed to be keeping calm, but you're not. No one's doing what they ought to. The whole of St. Mungo's now believes me to be the biggest pain in the arse," she said, smiling weakly. "They want us out, but it's still taking too long."

"Is there any chance she showed up at Hogwarts or something?"

"I've honestly got no clue. They've brought in the Ministry, you know. Except, the five wizards from Magical Law Enforcement are being used to keep us in the hospital rather than find her. None of them will go to our parents or anyone to see if they've heard anything and they've put up an Anti-Apparation barrier… We've tried everything- we can't contact anyone. Until we're released, we're seen as uncooperative patients. Once we are released, the hospital can't do much. We're all ready to go, though. All they need to do is say the word and we're out of here."

"When was the last time anyone saw her?"

"We started clearing out of the house once Dumbledore came and we fought on the grounds, but you know how outnumbered we were. We all scattered into the woods and started Apparating here. Morgana, we can't lose her!" Lily whispered, tears beginning to form in her eyes.

"Shh," she soothed, hugging Lily, staring at Sirius over her friend's shoulder. "We won't. I'm sure she's fine. She'll tell us how we've all been worried over nothing. She's probably having a drink by Rosemerta."

"For two hours?"

"Who knows, Lils? Look, we're going to find her. They can't have her. You know they would make a huge deal out of it if they captured one of ours."

"That's right," Matt said, bracingly, although he didn't look very convinced. "She might've just been hit by a stray stunner and no one found her."

They broke apart and Lily wiped her eyes. "Maybe. You're probably right. Enough chit-chat. I'll go yell at the receptionist some more," she growled. "I won't leave her until she hands me the paperwork."

"Atta girl."

Lily nodded determinedly and left the room. Immediately, Morgana swung her legs out of bed and tried to stand.

"I don't-" Matt began.

"With or without you, Matt," she grimaced, feeling dizzy as she stood. Matt half-carried her until she was sitting on the edge of Sirius' bed, kissing his forehead. "You've been strangely silent," she remarked gently.

"You're safe. I can't believe it. You're alive!"

"Never been anything else," she smiled. It faded, though, as she heard a man shouting in the lobby. She looked at Matt and he gave her a confused expression, walking out and closing the door behind him. "What on earth-?"

"Stay right here," Sirius ordered, grabbing her hand as she made to get up. "You won't make it to the door."

For the next two minutes, they strained their ears to hear the argument, but could make out no words. Morgana's heart began to pound louder and louder, quickening even more when Matt burst in once more.

"That was Allie's father. Dumbledore talked to him and he's finally got our release, so we're leaving right now," he said quickly before running back down the hall again.

Morgana stumbled to the door as fast as she could, just in time to see Chris sprint past her, a snarl on her face. "Remus?" she called, taking advantage of the commotion.

"In here," someone shouted across the hall and to her left. Leaning heavily against the wall, she snuck into the room, just in time for Remus to open the door, on crutches.

"Allie's father-" she began.

"I know. Which room are you in?" he asked.

She led back to the room, snapping the door shut behind him.

"How's Wormtail?" Sirius asked when he got in.

"They had to give him a Sleeping Draught, he was too anxious, but he'll be better within the week. I'm on these for two days. They said no weight on it, but…" he trailed off, not interested in idle conversation.

"Do you know how the fight went once we left?"

"I was the only one who was hurt badly, the Death Eaters retreated, the kids were fine. Gideon came back in and told me. He said that Dumbledore checked the Hogwarts grounds and Hogsmeade, she's not at her dad's place or Chris' or anyone's. The only place they're looking is the boarding school. After that…" he trailed off, his voice becoming more and more strained. "All the parents, the Order, even a few of the Hogwarts professors are looking."

"Sit down, you look faint," she said, easing him onto her bed. He winced and buried his head in his hands. Just seeing him so hopeless was draining.

"So do you," Sirius whispered when she sat back down. Admittedly, she felt as if she would be sick again, but she took the glass of ice water Sirius offered and drank it all quickly, shivering as it hit her empty stomach.

"They'll find her, I'm sure of it," she told them, trying to be optimistic and giving Remus a small smile, though he did not see it. "Allie's very capable and very sharp. I'm sure she's fine."

"They would cause a huge scene if they caught one of us," Sirius told him, parroting Morgana from earlier. "Everything tonight was a scare tactic- that's why they were targeting these muggles. If they failed at that, they would make a big deal out of capturing someone. We would know by now."

"Exactly," Morgana agreed quietly, though her stomach still tied into knots at the thought of Allie. "She just got knocked out and they left her. The worst that'll happen is a concussion."

"I love her," Remus croaked, hardly hearing them. "We just got back together- she has to come back. We haven't even told anyone yet. She was so excited…"

Morgana lost her voice for a second and felt a rush of panic before composing herself. "She'll come home to us," Morgana whispered, feeling her eyes burn. "She'll be back before you know it. She'll come home to you."

"Allison… Allison…" Remus whispered.

Sirius kissed Morgana's hand and she curled up next to him, shutting her eyes tight to keep from crying. They ached from holding back tears and being under the harsh hospital lights and all of the potions she had been given made her feel as if she hadn't slept in days. She began to count how many times Remus whispered Allie's name, but then remembered no more.

OxO

Morgana woke up to the sounds of a woman shrieking and sat bolt upright. Remus uncovered his face and looked up at her. She flashed her gaze to the clock— not even an hour had gone by since they left. She looked back at Remus and they both stood up and made their way as quickly to the door as they could, limping and stumbling along.

"The lobby…" Remus whispered when they got to the empty hall.

In the back of her mind, Morgana knew who the wordless screams belonged to— Chris.

Unstable, she sprinted down the hall, Remus on her heels, though she didn't know how he could move so fast with his knee in the condition it was in. They rounded the corner and pushed through the doors to see the Order and several other adults in clusters. One of the Prewett twins stood closest to Morgana and grabbed her forearm, both keeping her away from the group and holding her steady.

Lily was sobbing heavily into James' chest only a few feet away, several of the mothers and female Order members were crying. Everyone else looked pale and sickened, some holding looks of disgust. Caradoc Dearborn was sitting on the floor against the receptionist's desk, crying unashamedly. Morgana's parents and Steve hovered near the exit with a few other people, namely the Potters and a woman who reminded Morgana of Frank Longbottom. Everyone's eyes were fixed on five people in the direct center of the lobby. Two Healers and Mr. and Mrs. Handers were attempting to restrain Chris as she writhed on the floor, screeching so terribly that Morgana wasn't sure how her vocal chords had survived. She was clawing at her face and neck and blood vessels in her eyes had burst from her shrieks, turning the normal white to red. Spit trailed from her mouth onto the floor as she sobbed, entirely covered in mud, her clothes torn and her hair more knotted than it had been when she left. The look she held, though, was far worse. Her face was contorted in utter agony and grief and she looked as if she had gone insane. Her screams echoed deafeningly against the marble floor and the echoes mingled with her new wails.

Morgana's head spun more than ever and she heard one of the Prewett boys telling her from a thousand miles away, "We found her… I'm so sorry… She's dead."

She fell back but, instead of hitting a wall, someone caught her and held her close. She took in a shuddering breath and looked up at Matt.

"No…" she whimpered.

"We were too late."

"No," she sobbed, barely audible over Chris' screams.

"We need you all to clear out. Back to your room, Miss le Fay, come on," Healer Fern urged, gently pushing people toward the door which led to the hallway Morgana and Remus had just come from. The Prewetts led on and Matt followed, carrying Morgana bridal style. She caught a glimpse of Remus through her tears; he stood rooted in the same spot as before, staring at nothing, looking as if he was slowly being tortured. His chest rapidly rose and fell and tears streamed down his cheeks. A woman, his mother, walked over to him and embraced him, though he remained unmoved. Morgana ached even more for his loss and clung to Matt's neck tighter than ever. He hugged her back, whispering to her as she sobbed.

"I know, sweetheart, I know. But she's in a better place. She's not in pain— she's happy."

"She should be here," Morgana gasped. "Allie…"

"I'm so sorry. She was so good; she was a fantastic person."

Remus began to scream from the lobby.

Matt closed the door behind them, drowning out Remus' cries, and laid Morgana on the bed, pulling a sheet over her and moving her bed right up to Sirius'.

"We found her in the woods of the boarding school," Matt told him, his voice tired.

"She's…?"

"Yes."

"Jeez, Al…" Sirius brushed his fingers comfortingly across Morgana's back, but she ignored him, facing away from him and curling up, continuing to sob harder and harder. Sirius was silent, leaving her to her thoughts. Allie occupied her mind.

Closing her eyes, a vision of Allie at breakfast during Hogwarts hit her like a truck. She was seventeen or eighteen, her light brown hair falling in natural waves around her face as her eyes glittered and crinkled with a laugh. Sun poured in from the windows and the tips of her eyelashes glowed golden. A man's bulky ring glimmered on her thumb as she swept her hair out of her face with her nail, the other hand resting around a goblet. Remus had given her that ring, Allie had told Morgana. It had been his father's, but he had given it to Remus when he went to Hogwarts. In Morgana's memory, Remus was sitting next to Allie, his fingers brushing her arm as he watched her with gentle, warm happiness. It was in stark contrast to the raging grief the same face held tonight.

She was a teenager, barely out of Hogwarts. She was supposed to do things in her life! She got three months out of Hogwarts and that was it? How could such a sweet, young person die in such a way? She died fighting to make a better world. Did they torture her? Was she afraid? Did she have any last words? Was she defiant to the end?

Morgana, exhausted, soon ran out of tears, her pillow damp from them. She kept her eyes closed, not having the strength or will to open them. Matt gently brushed her hair from her face and Sirius kept his hand on her back.

"Is she asleep?"

"I think so, yeah."

"I heard Remus, but who else was screaming?" Sirius asked in a whisper.

"Chris. She… she was the one to find her. Chris and Caradoc were in a pair in the woods and she started screaming like mad. He ran after her and saw Allie and brought Chris to Dumbledore. No one's allowed to see Allie. It was too gruesome. Caradoc- Caradoc, mind you- is really shaken up over it and he's one of the toughest blokes I know. He said she looked like…" Matt paused. Morgana thought he was checking if she was still asleep, so she pretended to be, not having the energy to do anything else. "He said she looked like a pile of meat. They mutilated her. We don't know who did it or how, but they think it was right when we left. We wouldn't have saved her no matter how soon they let us out of here."

Sirius let out a long stream of swearwords. "What about Chris? What'll they do with her?"

"Modify her memory, I'd imagine. Poor thing'll go mad otherwise. They don't usually modify people's memories just to take something out- memories are a tricky bit to mess with- but they'd have to in this case. If they can save her mental wellbeing by it, they will. When the screaming stops, she'll probably have it out of her head."

Faintly, but certainly, Morgana could hear Chris' screams in the hospital.

"The girls…" Sirius sighed. "Morgana, Lily, Chris, Allie… they grew up together. And Remus, blimey, I thought I went through that tonight and… at least I got a reprieve. You know how much he loves her. There's no way they were mistaken? It's not like it was with Morgana?"

"She's not coming back, I'm afraid. It's her. They found her yellow trainers by the… the body. Her hair, her clothes… It's Allie."

Morgana was paralyzed. She knew those shoes, canary yellow (Allie's favorite color) with white rubber toes and bright, clean laces. Allie had kept them pristine; they were her favorites. The only marks allowed on them were Allie's, Lily's, Chris', and Morgana's signatures on the toes. She kept them at the end of her bed during Hogwarts and Chris had often tripped over them. When she and Allie had an argument once (and only once; the two never fought), Chris had knotted the laces and tossed them out the window so they could hang on a tree branch just outside of the Charms window, the class Allie was in at the time. Morgana could still recall the look of outrage on her face while she sat next to Morgana as if it had been yesterday.

That girl, the girl with canary yellow shoes, who insisted in fifth year that all her friends sign them, was gone. She no longer smiled or held a look of shock and outrage, her laughter didn't echo anymore, instead her body was disfigured to the point where it drove her best friend to the brink of insanity, her screams still ringing in Morgana's ears, though she was sure she had quieted by now. Those trainers were now probably coated in dirt and blood, though a patch of ruined yellow might still be peeking through the grime. Her shoes were no longer pristine, her skin was no longer flawless, her eyes were no longer bright, her hair was no longer gleaming, and now the memories of Allie were no longer happy and innocent. Morgana knew that they had been marred forever in her mind, just as everything else that was Allie had been marred. Instead of a bright, quiet friend she was a wonderful girl who had flashed through their lives, leaving in tragedy and devastating pain. No matter how much Morgana wanted to forget it, her memory would always be tainted with violence and despair.

"Where was her father?" Morgana choked out, turning her head toward Matt who looked a bit shocked that she was awake. "Where was her father?" she repeated.

"I don't know. I didn't see him after we split up at the grounds. I heard him shouting, though, once she was found. I don't know why he isn't here yet. Maybe Dumbledore's tending to him or something…" Matt sighed, getting up. Morgana opened her mouth, wanting him to stay, but he did not leave. Instead, he turned down the lights a bit and took his seat by her bed again. "The Healers wouldn't hesitate to give you something to help with the dreams."

"Why should I be so privileged?" she whispered bitterly, rolling onto her back and turning her head to Sirius. He met her eyes for a moment before looking away. She closed them, trying to remember every aspect of Allie that she could. She wanted to imprint her in her mind forever- her eyes, her hair, her hands, the way her smile was different for certain people. Those things were gone forever and needed to live on somehow, someway, even if it was only to be in memories.

Matt got up and left, the light brightening for a moment before he closed the door again. Gasping, Morgana tried to hold back dry sobs.

"I know, sweetheart," he soothed gently.

"She's dead…" Morgana whispered.

The words fell on her ears and her heart skipped a beat as her stomach turned. Dead. There it was. Four simple letters. Allie had died.

"She was alone…" Morgana said quietly.

"Yes, but we all die alone."

"Oh, shut it!" she snapped tearfully. "It shouldn't be this way and you know it! Quit trying to be all wise and insightful!"

"Come here," he urged, tugging at her sleeve.

"Don't touch me."

"Morgana, please… come here."

She hesitated a moment before lying on her side next to Sirius "I'm sorry," she whispered.

"Shh, don't be. You've nothing to be sorry for," he told her gently, tilting her head so that it rested on his shoulder.

"Now what do we do?" She was frozen and wanted to act instead, so she began to sit up. "I should go and see if I can find Caradoc or see how Chris is. And Remus'll be…"

"I'm sure they're all being tended to. They can wait a few more minutes if you want to stay with me," he told her, trying to hide the pleading tone in his voice, but she caught a bit of it.

Morgana paused for a second before nodding and relaxing again, continuing to wipe her eyes occasionally. "Okay," she whispered, giving Sirius a tiny, strained smile.

Allie. She had been with Sirius in this exact position at one time. She had been lounging on her side next to Sirius, lying on his arm in his bed in the boys' dormitories. Apart from Morgana, of course, Allie had really talked to him more than any other girlfriend and he hadn't minded at all. In fact, he had preferred it. Like Morgana and Lily, Allie knew how to put him in his place. She always listened and gave good advice. What was more, she truly made Remus happy. The two of them were so similar: quiet, kind, calm. While Sirius and Morgana joked around and bickered in the boys' dormitories, Allie and Remus quietly sat on his bed, talking or reading, sometimes just content to sit together- they were the mature couple. It was extraordinary to Sirius how close all the Gryffindors of that year were; six of them had coupled off with each other and every single one of them were friends. They were a family and now one of them would never come home, leaving the other seven to never be the same again.

Sirius and Morgana turned their heads as the door clicked open, revealing Mr. Harmons' face.

"Morgana? Thank God…" he breathed as her mother pushed through the door, hurrying to her daughter who was up in an instant.

"Mum!" she exclaimed, hugging her mother and father.

"We didn't get to see where you were, you were carried off so fast. We asked the receptionist and she said you were here."

"Do you know what's happening with Chris?"

"Not a clue. Maybe you'd better find Lily; check upstairs," her father suggested. Morgana pulled away a bit from the embrace and looked at Sirius who nodded and then back at her parents and Steve. "Go. We understand. Sirius can fill us in, I imagine."

"You bet, Mr. H."

"I'll be back in a few minutes," she sighed, hugging her parents and uncle and quickly kissing Sirius.

The halls were silent except for Morgana's footfalls. Unsure of where they might be, she decided to go to the fifth floor where the tearoom was, figuring that the Healers had shooed them away from the patient rooms. Her speed varied- half of her wanted to see the others and hear about Chris, half of her didn't want another confirmation of Allie's death and just wanted to collapse on the stairwell and let her ears ring from the silence. The latter idea, though, died out as she saw several Healers going about their daily duties. The hospital was beginning to wake up.

The tearoom, though, was empty save for two workers who looked up when she entered.

"Excuse me; have you seen a group of people about my age?"

"Conference Room One," an old woman told her, pointing to a door past the tables. She gave them a small smile and went to the door, opening it slowly.

The Order members were huddled in several small groups, talking in hushed tones. Several were holding steaming cups and several more were wiping their eyes or blowing their noses. Lily's eyes flicked up and met Morgana's the moment she entered.

"Hey," Morgana choked, walking up to Lily. She pulled away from James and hugged her friend tightly as both of them were hit by a wave of fresh tears.

"How's Sirius?" Lily asked dejectedly.

"Mature… for once. How they can keep from bawling is just beyond me," she breathed, referring to the boys and wiping her eyes. She hugged James tightly before speaking again. "How's Chris?"

Lily shook her head, shutting her eyes tight for a moment before opening them again. "She's been sedated. They've called in one of the two specialists to modify her memory. Something that traumatic's bound to have spread: it's trickier." She leaned in closer to Morgana and whispered in her ear. "They did a quick modification to everyone's memory- Matt knows you're an Animagus, but the others don't know anything about you or Peter or anyone. We thought that was safest- need to know basis and all."

"Good."

"Remus went back home, his mother's tending to him… I can't imagine how he's feeling. They just got back together, you know… hadn't even told anyone yet. Not that we didn't know those two weren't over it yet."

"And Caradoc?"

"Sedated. He won't let them modify him, though. He said he wants to remember it if he ever thinks of going soft on a Death Eater."

James put a hand on each of the girls' shoulders. "Why don't you two take a seat? You look like you'll fall over any minute now."

They looked over at the few chairs in the room, but they were filled. So, they sat against the wall, James on Lily's other side. Matt saw the three of them and sat next to Morgana when she patted the floor next to her. More and more gathered until everyone was sitting in a circle, completely silent. Tears fell noiselessly; no one looked at each other. Together, the Order faced the first casualty of one of their own, one of the youngest. Even some of those who didn't know Allie were crying; Morgana didn't recognize a handful of the mourners.

Time passed slowly and an easy blankness began to wash over Morgana as she heard a few visitors in the tearoom laughing. To the rest of the world, nothing had changed. Life went on as always and, somehow, thinking of that was a bit reassuring. Morgana was brought back to earth—things continued outside of their circle. It seemed to be contagious; the others stopped their crying and everyone began to look more and more tired. The grief was subdued for the moment, which Morgana thought was best, if only for a little while.

"I should go see Sirius," James sighed finally, looking at Lily. "Come with?"

She nodded and looked to Morgana who stood up with them, Matt following suit.

"Do you think he'd mind if Frank and I came, too?" Alice asked Morgana.

"Of course not," she told her, trying for a warm tone but just ending up with a croak. "The more, the… slightly-more-comforting, after all."

"Aye, nothing'll make this merrier," Frank muttered.

The six of them said their quiet goodbyes to the others, who assured them that they, too, would visit Sirius before his release from the hospital. The journey through the corridor and down the flights of stairs seemed like a practice funeral procession and Morgana thought that the footfalls of Frank's boots sounded like a deep, muffled voice saying her name—"Al, Al, Al, Al…" Everyone else's footsteps sounded like a hammer pounding nails into a distant coffin, quiet but somehow forceful at the same time. Morgana's head spun; it was as if she was in a dark room, staring out at the bright hallway and watching everyone else walk past. She was on autopilot, wishing for someone to suck the grief off of everyone's chests and bring Allie back.

"James! James, sweetheart, thank goodness!" Mrs. Potter exclaimed when they entered Sirius' room. The woman threw her arms around James and kissed his cheek. "Your father and I are so happy you're safe, but poor Allison..."

"Mum, now might not be the best time…" James said quietly, patting her on the shoulder to try to calm her down.

"You're right. Of course, you are," she agreed distractedly. Her eyes locked on Lily and she was hugging her in moments as well. "Oh, Lily, we were so worried about you, too. All of you! Are you okay?"

"As to be expected."

"And Morgana, you too?"

"Don't worry about me. I'll be alright."

"Yes, yes. Your parents and uncle left to try to fix your house up for Sirius and see what they can do for Remus and Mr. Etherson."

Morgana nodded and Mrs. Potter turned to Frank and Alice and greeted them as well. "Hello, dears. Haven't seen the two of you in ages. And who is this young man?"

"Matt McKinnon, ma'am," Matt said quietly, shaking the harried Mrs. Potter's hand. Morgana stepped away and crossed her arms as Frank, Alice, Matt, and Mrs. Potter began to speak softly while Mr. Potter, silent and unnoticed, slipped into the conversation. Sirius locked eyes with Morgana and she sighed, shuffling over to him as he spoke to James, switching his gaze between the two of them. Morgana sat in a chair by his injured side, pressing her fist to her mouth as the tears fell for a short while once again. The same thoughts seemed to be on a loop in her mind, all memories of Allie.

Lily was crying as well, losing her composure and burying her face in James' shoulder for a few minutes. She had faced unexpected deaths before, but not like this. Morgana knew she was still burdened with her parents' deaths and had never settled in with Morgana's family, though she was accepted in effortlessly and had always put on a smile. She was still haunted by the ordeal, as was to be expected. Morgana imagined that Allie's death would only bring those emotions back to the surface once more.

"Come on, beautiful," James urged, speaking into Lily's hair and kissing her head. "I'm taking you home. You shouldn't stay here like this."

"I'm fine, James."

"Go on, Lils," Sirius agreed, squeezing her hand. "We'll see you in a bit. You need to rest, I'm sure."

She tearfully shook her head, but complied when James patted her on the arm to try to make her stand up. He put his arm around her shoulder and led her out of the room, muttering farewells to everyone.

"You should go, too," Sirius told Morgana, but she shook her head.

"I don't want to go. Not until you can come home, too."

"I'll be home before you know it. You need to wash all of the muck off you and change your clothes, take a breather. Visit tonight and I'll be right here when you get back, promise."

"I really don't want to be alone in that house right now, Sirius. Please."

"Your parents and Steve are probably over there right now. Well, maybe you should go with someone, just in case. Hey, Matt," Sirius said a bit louder. Matt turned his head immediately, falling out of the conversation with the Potters. "Can you go with Morgana to the house? I know her parents are supposed to be there, but just in case, no one needs to be alone right now."

"Yeah, of course."

Morgana bent down and kissed Sirius. "I love you. I'm so glad you're okay."

"I love you, too."

"I'll come by again this evening, okay?"

Matt led her out into the lobby and held her arm as she had him Side-Apparate to her house.

"Nice place."

"My parents bought it for me. I thought they'd hate me moving out, but I think they figured it would be easier to move me out right after graduation rather than wait. Not to mention how much I would need to come and go for the Order," she explained, stepping into the empty kitchen and pausing as she thought. "She got me a mirror for a housewarming gift. How can I ever look into it?"

"I… I don't know," Matt confessed truthfully.

Morgana sighed and summoned some clothes before locking herself in the bathroom. She stood fully clothed for a few minutes before peeling away the layers of clothing, tossing them out onto the floor and watching the specks and streaks of dirt and blood contaminate the water pooling at her feet. Had she known twelve hours ago that she would be standing in her shower, grief-stricken and unable to get Allie out of her mind…

She washed up slowly, being rough on her skin and hair until her fingers were stiff from the scrubbing. The hot water helped her aching shoulder, but it still felt as though someone had pounded it with a hammer. She stepped out and changed into the new set of clothes, magically drying her hair and cleaning up the pile of wet clothes. Matt was waiting at the kitchen table, dozing off. He started when he saw her but relaxed and said, "I sent a Patronus to your parents to tell them we're here so they don't get spooked and think we're Death Eaters or something if they come in."

"Take a shower and then go sleep for a while. The couch is all yours," she told him dully, slowly walking into the living room as he went into the bathroom.

Morgana gravitated to the bookshelf and couldn't take her eyes off of the pictures.

In one, Allie, Remus, Morgana, Sirius, and Lily all sat on a couch in the common room, their feet propped up on a table while James laid across their laps, wiggling his feet and resting his head on Lily's lap as she slapped him. Allie leaned forward to tell the other girls something and the three of them laughed before leaning back and waving at the camera. Allie's ponytail whipped back and forth as she shook her head, grinning and kissing Remus' cheek as her eyes glinted.

In another, she and Chris were talking quietly in the dormitories. Morgana had taken this just before they had to start packing to leave at the end of seventh year. Here, Allie was her calm, quiet self while Chris had exaggerated expressions and rolled her eyes more times than Morgana cared to count. Allie would look at the camera, give it a small smile, and flutter her fingers in a wave before picking the conversation back up.

Morgana took the frame from the shelf and sat in the chair Sirius usually occupied, staring at the photo. When she had snapped this, Allie had mere months to live. She had one more short summer and then no more. A dark thought crept into Morgana's mind: who else had mere months? Any one of her friends could have just as much time left as (or maybe even less than) Allie had when Morgana had taken that picture. What about Lily or James or Sirius? Would Remus or Chris take a stupid chance in their grief and lose their lives? There was no way to tell. It was unforeseeable by Allie's face in the picture. She hadn't said anything unusual. There were no signs or omens, she just… died.

Died. There was that word again. Morgana had to force herself to think it. It was easier to think "not living" than "dead" for some reason. Allie wasn't alive anymore. Allie died very early this morning. The first sentence was so much easier than the second. But there was a third fact… Morgana couldn't even bring herself to think it again. It seemed so much worse here in her home rather than at St. Mungo's. Her home was friendly, but now the silence rang in her ears and she was plagued with guilt and grief. She couldn't bring herself to think of those six words, just the emotions from them already had her sobbing again, but the finality of thinking and saying that sentence…

No, she had to think it. She had to say it. She only had so long to grieve before they had to help Chris and Remus and Mr. Etherson, so she had to make the most of her time. She had to stop trying to repress it. Those words needed to be said so that she could cry until there were absolutely no more tears left and Matt would have to give her a sleeping draught to calm her down for a few hours. She would visit Sirius that night with red eyes and wonder if the pain would ever pass or if she would just get used to having Allie be gone. And when Morgana went to sleep on the couch that night with Steve sleeping on an air mattress on the floor, she would dream of canary yellow shoes on the forest floor as she cowered behind a tree, shaking and wishing for the screams to stop. She would wake up twice that night and ache all over in the morning.

So, she said the six words, the third and final fact, sobbing as she went.

"I… will never see Allie… again."

OxO

The next day, Lily and Morgana knocked on Mrs. Lupin's door. Each of the girls sported matching sets of pink eyes and the pockets of their robes were stuffed with tissues.

"Good morning, girls," Mrs. Lupin said, looking rather weary. "I'm sure you're here to see Remus."

"If he's up for it. We just want to see how he's doing and if we can help," Lily explained.

"We wanted to bring this by," Morgana said, holding up a basket of food. "Lily, James, and I made enough food to feed an army yesterday and last night. It's so easier if we keep busy."

"That's very kind of you all. Why don't you come in?"

Lily and Morgana stepped inside the small house and followed Mrs. Lupin into the kitchen. "Can we help with anything?" Lily offered.

"Everything's well looked after, I think. Frank and Alice stopped by yesterday afternoon. Remus wouldn't see them, but they made the funeral arrangements for me. Mr. Etherson had enough trouble trying to get in contact with her mother and he didn't want to think about it, so he left it up to me, the poor man. It's scheduled for Wednesday. You'll both probably get an owl about it today. I forget what time she said…" the woman sighed, dabbing her eyes with a handkerchief. "There'll be a short wake tomorrow. It seems like everything is moving so fast, but I suppose it's normal. It has been a whole day."

"I think everyone just wants it to be over and have her at peace," Lily suggested.

"Yes… Why don't I go see if he's up for visitors? There's a kettle on the stove, so help yourselves."

Lily sat down and Morgana leaned against the counter, crossing her arms. "Tomorrow, huh?"

"Isn't Sirius released tomorrow?"

"They're thinking in the early afternoon. I'll get him home and settled and head off to the wake."

"You know he'll want to come with. Do you want James to come help? I don't like the idea of you transporting Sirius to a place you hardly know while he's in a wheelchair."

"It'd be great if he could come," Morgana nodded and they waited in silence for Mrs. Lupin to come back. She returned a minute later, looking a bit surprised. "He says he'll see you. I didn't think he would. You can go on up, I left the door propped."

"Thank you."

Lily and Morgana climbed the narrow staircase. Morgana thought that the house looked exactly like a place where Remus would live. It was small, but warm, full of books and photographs. Today, though, it seemed dull and grey, but Remus' room was even worse. Lily knocked and poked her head in. "Hey, Remus."

He was sitting on the floor by his bed, leaning back against the quilt. The way he was sprawled out made it look as if he had been shot and had sunk down to the ground. It seemed amazing how fast he had deteriorated. A day and a half had passed and he looked thinner than ever, as if he hadn't eaten in weeks. His skin, dotted with stubble, was stretched gaunt across his cheeks, making the scars pop in the dim light. He made no effort to get up and only his eyes moved when they entered, kneeling down on either side of his legs. Morgana felt her stomach turn at how depressed he looked and she glanced over to see that Lily, too, had her lips pursed to keep composure. They sat in silence for several minutes as Remus stared at the foot of his dresser. His expression was full of agony. At last, he found his voice.

"Where's James?"

"He's at the hospital visiting Peter and Sirius. Pete can't leave for a few more days, but Sirius is coming home tomorrow," Lily informed him. Her voice was normal, but her face betrayed her.

"Chris?"

"She's home. Morgana and I tried visiting, but her parents said she's refusing visitors. We only talked to them on the porch, we weren't even allowed in. James wanted you to have this, though. He said it's from him, Sirius, and Peter." Lily pulled a rectangular box wrapped in black paper out of her purse. Remus slowly took it and unwrapped it, pulling a new bottle of Firewhiskey out. "Something tells me he wanted us gone before you opened it," Lily said.

"As long as Mum doesn't find out," he croaked, opening it, taking a gulp, and rolling the bottle under his bed. "The wake's tomorrow."

"Yes."

"The funeral's Wednesday. You know… she lived a lot of Wednesdays. Each one was exactly one week closer to her... her funeral," he observed, his voice breaking. "Some old fart who drank himself to death is probably going to get buried Wednesday, the same day as my Allie. He was responsible for his death, she wasn't. I don't get it. I don't get why some people get their arses kicked by life, you know? I mean, why does she die like that and you and James get to go off and get married and you get to have Sirius and Frank and Alice are given their wedding, but her and I get tossed about like this?"

"I don't think anyone understands," Morgana confessed, speaking for the first time since they entered. "We would do anything to have it be different, but it can't be. But we're here for you, whatever you need, Remus. Just say the word."

"I'm going to find out which of them did this and I will make each and every one of them pay," he said, his eyes glowing with hatred. "I will make what they did to her look like a fairy tale."

"Remus—" Lily began.

"I think you two better go. I want to be alone. I'll see you tomorrow."

Lily and Morgana exchanged looks, but decided to respect his wishes. They hugged him briefly and left the house, wondering if they had only succeeded in making things worse.

OxO

"Okay, Sirius, I don't want you to put any weight on that leg at all and try not to move your arm," Healer Fern said. "Just because you have a leg brace and a sling instead of casts, doesn't mean you can do whatever you feel like. Don't you touch that left wheel until this time next week, understand? Morgana or someone is to be pushing you around for a week. You can hop on your good foot to get out of the chair and sit down on the couch or wherever, but no more than that," the Healer explained firmly. She looked curiously torn for a moment and then sighed. "You're okay to Apparate to your friend's wake and back, but that's it. I want as little Apparation as possible. It can do strange things to your healing process if you do it too much."

"Okay," Sirius agreed, eager to leave the hospital room. He was dressed in a suit for the wake and Morgana in a black dress.

Getting Sirius released was taking longer than expected and the wake was over half way through by now. Morgana quickly agreed their way through the rest of the explanations before pushing Sirius out of the room, her heels clicking down the hall. James and Lily, waiting in the lobby, sprang up when they entered and James put his hands on Sirius' shoulders, Disapparating quickly. Morgana and Lily followed after them, arriving at the corner of the funeral home's parking lot. James handed Sirius back over to Morgana and they quickly walked into the small entrance hall, turning to the right to see Mr. Etherson greeting mourners near a wooden podium. An older couple Morgana didn't recognize was signing the book and moving toward Allie's father. They all signed in and waited to speak to Mr. Etherson.

"I expected to see you lot here sooner," he sighed when they gathered around him. He looked just as gaunt as Remus, perhaps even more so.

"We got stuck at the hospital. We meant to be here earlier. I'm sorry," Morgana explained.

"Oh, I'm not blaming you. You shouldn't be here all day. At any rate, you beat her mother."

"She's not here?" Lily asked, surprised.

"I haven't been able to reach her. I've tried everything, but she's nowhere to be found. Figures with that woman. She wasn't there for Allie in life, why should she be in d-death?" he said, a slight snarl in his voice, even as it caught on the final word. "I'm so glad she has friends like you lot. And, I don't mean to bother, but I just think it's worth a shot to say it and I owe it to you: Don't do this. Don't fight. You're kids, fresh outta school. Let the trained wizards and witches deal with it; don't make your parents go through what I'm going through right now. I don't want her death to be in vain."

"All due respect, but that's why we've got to keep fighting, sir," James told him firmly. "If we quit now, it will be in vain. Someone's got to fight and I think we've got the most talented witches and wizards out there. If we can't do it, no one can."

"I figured you'd say something like that. Just try to stay as safe as possible, eh? No parent should have to bury their child."

"Mr. Etherson, we better let you go. There's a line halfway to Russia behind us," Lily sighed, hugging the man. Morgana followed suit and James and Sirius shook his hand before they moved on to Remus who was sitting in a chair in the row nearest to the coffin. It was surrounded by yellow roses and pictures of Allie.

"Hey, guys, thanks for coming," Remus said dutifully, getting up and meeting them in the aisle. Although he was clean and dressed up, he still looked haggard. His outburst from the day before was long forgotten—it didn't look like he could ever be angry again, just extremely sad. "I just sat down. I've been greeting people all morning."

"Well, sit back down. We're no one to get up for," James ordered, gently pushing Remus into his chair again.

"Yeah, I've taken to not even walking in the presence of others," Sirius joked, patting the wheelchair. Remus pulled up a corner of his mouth in acknowledgement.

"I don't know if Paul told you," Remus began, referring to Mr. Etherson, "but we're asking everyone to try to wear some yellow tomorrow. He's been preoccupied with Allie's mother and everything, so it's sort of fallen onto me. You can wear as much or as little as you want, but we just thought it would be nice to have it in there since she was so young and we didn't think she'd want everything in black anyway. Lils, Ana, you can wear an outfit that's entirely yellow if you want to go that far, we don't really care. Pads, Prongs… don't do anything embarrassing and you'll be fine."

"We can do somber, Moony," Sirius assured him sincerely. "After all, my name is Sirius Black, I should try to live up to it once in a while."

"Well, we're trying to make it a little more of celebration of life rather than a dreary funeral. Things are morbid enough as is. We were wondering if you girls wanted to say a few words. It doesn't have to be long, just a nice eulogy."

"Yeah, of course," they agreed quietly.

"And then James, if you could be a pallbearer, Frank, Caradoc, Matt, and Allie's twin cousins are going to be the others." Remus seemed so composed now. Morgana thought he was trying to be occupied with the services and wait to grief for her, throwing himself entirely into giving her a good send off. "We'd have you be one too, Pads, but seeing as you're an invalid now…" His attempt at a joke was feeble.

"I bet I can come up with no less than seventy-three ways to make you an invalid with that flower arrangement over there," Sirius replied effortlessly. The corners of Remus' mouth twitched before he looked gaunt once more. He looked past Morgana's shoulder and they all turned to see Professor McGonagall coming toward them.

"Hello, Professor," Remus said.

She put a hand on his shoulder and said, "I'm so sorry. All of you. Barely out of my house and already…"

"She was the definition of a true Gryffindor," Sirius said firmly.

"I couldn't have said it better myself, Black."

"Is term starting well?" Remus asked, his voice tight.

"Yes, yes. Very well," she replied dismissively, waving her hand. "It's too quiet of a year. Not one Slytherin went to the hospital this week for abnormal bodily functions. Most peculiar that it hasn't happened this year, yet the Hospital Wing was never empty the last seven years."

"Most unusual. You should look into it," Sirius said.

"Black, I believe I am right now and it's sitting in a wheelchair."

"Don't bully the invalid, Professor. He's got enough problems," Sirius scolded, pointing his finger and frowning.

She pursed her lips, but relaxed when seeing that the corners of Remus' mouth twitched again. "Is Peter Pettigrew still in the hospital?"

"Yes, he'll be released tonight or tomorrow morning, and Chris went home yesterday, but she's refusing visitors. I think she's recovering from the memory modification as well," Lily informed her.

"Those two girls were inseparable... Well, I should pay my respects and be on my way. I have a lesson in a few minutes. I'll see you all soon, I imagine."

Remus sighed and got up. "I should be getting back to my job, too. Let me know when you guys leave, okay?" He walked back down the center aisle to hug a middle-aged woman and the others made their way over to Matt, Frank, Alice, Caradoc, the Prewett brothers, and other Order members who were talking in small groups amongst themselves. Morgana knew they were making social visits to everyone first, because after sitting by the coffin and thinking about Allie a while, no one would be in the mood to talk much.

"Hey, Sirius, nice wheels," Matt observed.

"Cost an arm and a leg," Sirius quipped. Morgana and Lily rolled their eyes, not amused. Only Sirius would crack jokes at a childhood friend's wake.

"Ah, let him be. A chuckle here and there won't hurt anyone. I'm sure she'd like it if she were here. She was constantly smiling," Matt told Morgana, gently shaking her by the shoulder.

"Remus told you about the yellow tomorrow?" Alice asked.

"Yep."

"It's supposed to be damp and a bit chilly, so you could probably do with an umbrella or coat if you have any in yellow," Alice suggested, her eyes wandering to the coffin. "I should go pay my respects."

"Me, too. You coming, Ana?"

"Yeah," she sighed, looking down at Sirius. He squeezed her hand.

"Go on. James and I'll be over in a minute," he assured her, trying to listen to some news Frank had about the boarding school mission. Morgana caught up to Lily and Alice who were seated in the front row by the casket, dabbing their eyes. Morgana took a seat and Lily gasped, crying harder.

"This is going to sound really vain of me and horrid, but I don't mean it like that at all… I just thought of something… I'll be short a bridesmaid. There'll be her empty spot. She won't be at my wedding or Christmas or parties. She won't be anywhere anymore. She's always going to be missing. It's not just the wedding, it's our entire lives."

Morgana held Lily's hand and Alice put an arm around the red head's shoulder and said quietly, "Well, that's why we're crying, isn't it? It's not vain—it's final."

"I think you just had a Eureka moment of some sort," Morgana said.

"Yeah, well, it sucks. The entire situation does. And by the word sucks, I'm underexaggerating, of course." Lily groaned and covered her face. "She won't be here for anything anymore. She won't be here for anyone's weddings or birthdays or holidays or when babies are born. I mean, I knew it, but I didn't really think of it like that. I just thought of her…" she trailed off, circling her hands and trying to find the right words, but giving up a few moments later. "I'm just starting to get that she's… ended. God, it's just like them all over again," she wept quietly, burying her face in her hands. Alice looked at Morgana over the top of Lily's head.

"Her parents?" she mouthed silently. Morgana gave her a tiny nod before hugging Lily and resting her head on Lily's shoulder.

"It's okay, Lils. Cry as much as you need."

She pulled her head up and fiddled with her handkerchief and sniffed, "I don't understand it. I wasn't this much of a wreck at their funerals but at Allie's…"

"I'm going to get you some water, okay?" Alice offered, getting up and hurrying off. Morgana linked her arm with Lily's and held her right hand with both of hers.

"You know, when you're a kid, sometimes you think about your parents dying. It's natural when you hear so many stories about orphans, but we're not supposed to think about our friends dying. Not when they're our age and we've grown up with them and just got out of school, even if we are fighting in a war like this. No one expected it. It was our first battle. You're going to be a wreck because…"

"We're not kids anymore now. We're grownups. We're not even teens. I mean, by definition, yeah, but not really. Not anymore. We're getting married, having our own houses, fighting bad guys, dying for a cause. We're eighteen. We're only eighteen."

Now it was Morgana's turn to cry. Eighteen. A few years ago, when she was a child, she couldn't understand why anyone would want to be kissed and was being tucked in by her father, counting the birthdays until she could go to Hogwarts. Childhood seemed like last week, but her first Order meeting, where engagements were announced and she was reunited with old friends, seemed like a century ago. The tears slid down her face steadily, but she didn't make a sound. She didn't whimper or heave shuddering gasps, she just bit her lip and stared at the foot of an easel holding a large picture of Allie smiling at them all. She couldn't bear to look at the photos, not of eighteen-year-old Allie beaming or of six-year-old Allie with the pigtails in the wagon. When Allie was six, a third of her life was over. By nine, she was midway through her time with them. Her sweet sixteen marked her third to last birthday party—sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, gone. She had known Morgana just short of half of her life. Seven years. When they met on the train, Morgana didn't know that the quiet girl with the light brown ponytail and stick thin arms and legs would grow up to be her beautiful friend and would die in a little over seven years. If she had been looking at a timeline, she would be closer to the end marked "DEATH" than the one marked "BIRTH" that day she met Lily, Morgana, and her best friend, Chris. Even as she introduced herself, she had been dying.

"I should have brought two glasses, I see," Alice commented, watching Morgana cry.

"I don't need any," Lily said, her face drying now that she had stopped her weeping. She handed Morgana the glass of water and watched her friend drink half of it and then hold it in her lap.

James and Sirius came over soon and spent the remainder of the wake by Allie's casket. The hour and a half was broken up by a few people coming to speak to the group. They had recognized the Marauders, Frank, Alice, Lily, and Morgana from some of the pictures spread around and exchanged anecdotes before stopping by the casket and heading out the door. Mr. Etherson came to the front of the room right at the hour and cleared his throat. By that time, the room was a bit fuller than it had been all day, and he looked worse than ever, but his voice was strong.

"I would just like to thank everyone for coming today. This is a very difficult time for us all and I know that she would be happy to see such good company gathering in her name. It's truly humbling to see how many people my daughter has touched and how good those people are. We've received a few very kind donations of flowers and food and some monetary donations to help cover the expenses for the ceremonies. No one can plan for this, but it's inspiring to see how many people will help you at your darkest hour.

"I won't sugar coat it. The last time I spoke to Allison, we argued. I wanted her to stay safe, but she wanted to fight for what she believed in. She wanted to make the world a better place and to make a difference. Maybe she didn't get to in the way that she planned, but I think that just being herself, she made our lives better. Being her father, I would have loved her even if she was completely opposite, but she made it so easy to love her. Quiet, compassionate, sincere, and sometimes surprising… She was Allie. Thank you again," he repeated. Mr. Etherson stepped down and walked back down the center aisle to talk to a few more people as the crowd began to murmur once more.

"We'd better go," James suggested, standing up. "You girls have a eulogy to write and I'm sure Mr. Etherson just wants to get home. Four less people to shove out the door if we leave."

Remus stepped into the group, overhearing James. "He's right. You shouldn't have to stay here until the last person leaves. We'll be clearing out soon, anyway. Go on. I'm sure you have to get Sirius settled in yet, anyway."

Lily stepped forward and hugged him, kissing his cheek. "G'bye, Remus. See you in the morning. Love you."

"Love you, too."

Morgana hugged him as well. "Love you, Moony." He kissed her cheek and she stepped back. James hugged him tightly and patted him on the back. Remus and Sirius exchanged glances, Remus trying hard to act as he normally would. Sirius puckered his lips and squeezed his eyes shut.

"It'll be a cold day in hell when I kiss that mug," Remus chuckled, though it still sounded very strained.

"You know you want to. What've Lily and Morgana got that I haven't?"

"Sirius Black the Ladies' Man doesn't know his basic anatomy?"

"Touché, Moony, but I'm still waiting."

"Get him out of my sight," Remus joked dully. "See you tomorrow, guys." Morgana quickly pecked Sirius' still-puckered lips and wheeled him around so she could push him back to the exit.

"You know," James began wistfully in the parking lot. "Had we not been at our friend's very public wake, you would have been kissing something very different than your dear Morgana's succulent lips. It was the perfect opportunity and I had to miss it."

"What do you know about her succulent lips?"

"You kissed my fiancée!"

"When we were kids!"

"Well, that's how I became acquainted with Morgana's mouth, too!"

"James, that's enough!" Lily hissed. "We're leaving a wake, for crying out loud!"

"And Sirius Black, you would do well to live up to your name for once, too. Honestly, you weren't hanging out with your mates on a Friday night. You were at Allie's wake, or had you forgotten? I can't even count the innuendos you made tonight," Morgana said angrily.

"Hey, people deal with death in different ways," he said sincerely. "I'm a humor guy and everybody could use a good natured chuckle once in a while. Didn't you see other people? They were talking and telling little stories about Allie and they'd laugh every once in a while. Pardon me for not bawling my eyes out."

That did it. Morgana stopped in her tracks and let go of the wheelchair to cross her arms. Lily, too, stopped to look at Sirius.

"I'm sorry, that came out wrong," he apologized quickly.

"Sounded like it came out just fine, didn't it, Lils?"

"I thought so."

James stepped in. "Hold on here, guys. I think we're losing sight of what we just came out of and where we're going tomorrow. The funeral's tomorrow and we're arguing about whether Sirius is an insensitive idiot or just a regular idiot."

Sirius immediately began to backpedal, however. "What I meant was that I'm not a crying type of person! Part of that is me being a guy, the other part of that is just me being me! I'm going to miss Allie, too, but she's not in pain, she's not scared, she doesn't have to fight anymore or anything like that. I like to think she's someplace better and that's something to be happy about. I wish she didn't have to die so young and if she did I wish it was something easier and not horrific, so that's what'll make me sad. Funerals are so focused on mourning the dead so as to comfort the living, but maybe it'd be more of a comfort if it was more focused her life, not the way she went out." He paused, waiting for an argument, but everyone remained silent. "Morgana, she died thinking you were dead—we all thought it. Don't you think she's happy that you're alive? Do you think she'd want to see you wasting a single minute being pissed at me over her wake? She's not like that! Yeah, she didn't want to die, but don't you think she's glad we all came out of this alive and not too-terribly maimed?"

Morgana waited a moment before pushing him toward the corner of the parking lot again. "You would have made a really good con artist," she told him. "It's not like we were trying to cry, you know."

"You're supposed to mourn at a wake and we were, just in different ways," he assured her as James grabbed his shoulders so they could Disapparate. Lily and Morgana lingered in the parking lot for one more moment.

"Sirius is going to pay dearly for that, isn't he?"

"For thinking for one moment that he won an argument? Wouldn't have it any other way. And James?"

"Trying to play mediator because he was chicken enough not to pick a side? It'd be disrespectful to Al if things changed just because we were at her wake." Lily held out her hand so Morgana could Side-Along Disapparate. "Besides, as much as Allie loved them, you know she adored it when we made those two pay."

OxO

Morgana was staring at the casket yet again as the congregation sang a hymn. She had tried to listen to the minister when he greeted the crowd, but found that nothing really sank in. She was numb, unfocused, and unable to take her eyes off of her friend's coffin for more than a few moments.

She and Lily had cried when they wrote the eulogy, as was to be expected. They all remained quiet for the rest of the night, but it had been peaceful and calm. The silence didn't ring in her ears anymore and she thought for a moment, a bit baffled, that maybe most of the grieving would be buried with Allie. Now that Morgana was sitting at the funeral, she knew she had been wrong.

Remus and Mr. Etherson looked worse than ever now that they couldn't throw themselves into making sure the services ran smoothly and they could no longer pretend to be businesslike for a few minutes. James held Lily's hand as she dried the steady stream of silent tears from her cheeks. Occasionally she would pick at her yellow nail polish or straighten the yellow shrug she had put on over her strapless black dress.

To Morgana's left, Sirius was holding her hand. Most of the men were wearing yellow ties and had a yellow rose or carnation or cloth in their pocket; but, James and Sirius had taken it one step further, wearing matching pairs of bright yellow dress shoes. James had also wrapped yellow ribbons onto the spokes of the wheels on Sirius' chair and magically changed the color of the seat and back of it to match temporarily. In addition, Morgana had sworn that she had spotted a tube of yellow face paint as James shoved it into his jacket pocket, but he must have thought better of it. Of course, Morgana had put on yellow as well. She tied some of Sirius' left over ribbon to hold her pony tail and had painted her nails yellow as well. She even stole the spool of very wide ribbon from James and belted her dress around the waist with a bow in the back. She and Lily also had found a yellow trench coat and a jacket in their respective closets along with a yellow umbrella at Morgana's parents' house. She smiled a little when she thought of how much Allie would relish everyone looking like a swarm of bumblebees just for her.

Morgana wasn't smiling for long, though. Lily tugged her sleeve and they walked to the podium for the eulogy.

Lily switched the papers so that the eulogy notes were on top and looked out at the crowd, giving them a strained but warm smile, "A bit unconventional to have two of us up here, but we didn't think that the services needed to include a cat fight to see who would be the eulogist." A murmur of chuckles made its way through the crowd before Lily started again.

"On the eighth of June in 1960, Allison Etherson came into the world. Family members who were there and pictures from that day can assure you that she was a beautiful baby girl who continued to get more beautiful every moment. She was a happy, laughing little girl and that never changed.

"Morgana and I met Allie on the train to school seven years ago on September first. Along with Christine Handers, we four became fast friends and spent the best years of our lives together. We all grew to be like sisters, especially Chris and Allie, who had no siblings of their own.

"I feel blessed to have been given the opportunity to spend seven years with Allie, laughing, crying, talking, and, most usually, studying until we were cross-eyed and seeing several Allies at once." There were a few more chuckles. "In our group of friends, Allie was the quiet, sensible one. She wasn't always in the center of things, but she was supportive, compassionate, bright, and one of the kindest people I've ever met. I think that's how we all knew her to be. She was optimistic and loved her friends and family dearly. If one of us was happy, she was happy. If someone was sad, she was there to comfort them." Lily stepped aside for Morgana.

"For all of this," Morgana said, "she needs to be remembered for her life, not her death, because death was just one part of her, one small moment which we will forever feel the consequences of. Everything she was was because of her life, not her death. In her life, she had family, made friends, and fell in love. She leaves all those people, all of us, behind.

"We can never and will never forget her. Something will always trigger Allie in our hearts and minds: a song, a smell, a picture, even something as simple as the color yellow. We can remember the bright eighteen-year-old who left us far too soon and just follow her example and try to make the world a better place and always be kind and never be afraid to laugh. If there were more Allies in the world, it'd be a much better place to live and that's all she wanted—a better place for us all. I just wish she could be here with us, and I'm not alone in wishing that. But she'll never really be gone. Never. So, this is only goodbye for a little while." Morgana and Lily simultaneously turned to the coffin.

"We'll see you later, Al," Lily said softly. The two walked back to their seats and sat down.

"You're shaking," Sirius whispered to Morgana, grabbing her hand and kissing it. Morgana squeezed his hand back and made it through the rest of the funeral without tears. She could tell that Lily wasn't paying attention to anything going on either. The redhead had been staring at the base of the podium for the entire service and was always late when she had to stand or sit or respond. It seemed to take an age before James and the other pallbearers went up and carried the casket down the aisle, Allie's father, Remus, Lily, Morgana, and Sirius not far behind.

"Thank you, girls, really," Mr. Etherson told Lily and Morgana, gripping their hands momentarily.

"We just said what we knew," Lily said.

"And that was what needed to be said. Morgana, you might want to get Sirius to the car," he added, seeing that others were leaving the church and the steps were already starting to get crowded.

"We'll see you there, then. Come on, speed racer," she sighed, pushing Sirius away toward the car. She opened the door and supported him as he somehow managed to maneuver into the passenger's seat by hobbling on one foot. With the wheelchair folded and tossed in the trunk, she took the driver's seat and they waited in silence for a few minutes as people went to their cars.

"Lily's still talking to Paul. Looks like he's crying," Sirius noted, watching out the window. From a distance, they could see Lily gripping Mr. Etherson's forearm as he nodded and looked at the ground.

"I can't even imagine what he must be feeling…"

"She's getting him toward the hearse now," he commented, his eyes following Lily as she guided the man toward the black hearse before walking to James. He hugged her and they went to her car in front of Morgana's, holding up a hand to the others.

"Do you think it's peaceful where she is?" Morgana asked quietly.

"I think she's happy. Whether or not that involves peace doesn't matter. Maybe she's kicking Death Eater arse way up there and it's constant excitement or maybe not. Maybe she's just floating about somewhere, finally resting. As long as she's happy…"

"It's just… not right!" she said shrilly as tears came to her eyes once more. "There's not a person in the world sweeter than her, so why did it have to happen? Who knows what she could've done! Maybe she'd find the cure to some disease or be a brilliant leader or something."

"It's not right, but maybe one of those kids at the school is going to find the cure or be the leader. It's not right, it's not just, but it's certainly not going to be in vain."

"I don't want any of us to go through this again."

"You can't always get what you want, but I promise you that you will never have to go to my funeral because of this war."

"Ditto," she sighed, still crying.

"Start her up, I think we're moving."

As with all funerals, the drive to the cemetery was painfully slow and Sirius and Morgana remained silent. They crawled through the streets of the small town Allie had grown up in and then, finally, reached a cemetery. The hearse led them, winding through the cemetery until they reached a lot near the middle. About five or six rows back was a newly dug grave with bars across the top of it. After a few minutes, the pallbearers were resting Allie's coffin atop the bars and everyone was settling in. Finally, the priest began to speak.

"Let us commend Allison Etherson to the mercy of God…"

His words washed over Morgana in a dismal echo. She could hear them repeated over and over again and she began to question their validity.

'And if I want to commend her to the mercy of her friends? Who's to say God will take her? Can't He reject her and tell her to go back to her body and let us deal with her?'

A crisp breeze blew Morgana's dress about her knees. The weather seemed to be blank- not all that sunny, not all that cloudy, just… empty. It was a bit chilly for September and wind swirled the first leaves of fall along the ground. They had wilted early, unable to stand the bitter frost from the nights before. It would be a bitterly cold winter with such a cruel frost so early in the year.

Morgana looked around at her friends, trying not to give in to the sickening need to look at Allie's coffin. Everyone stood except for three men. Sirius was next to Morgana in his wheelchair. Allie's grandfather sat directly opposite of Sirius on the other side of the coffin. He grasped his cane in both hands, closing his eyes and nodding slowly as the priest prayed. He reminded Morgana of churchgoers she had seen on T.V. who constantly, evenly moved their heads, murmuring in agreement as a choir belted loudly, "Lord, move that mountain!" He was wrinkled and worn, but serene.

Then, there was Remus.

He had fallen to the grass the moment everyone had gathered and seemed to have no will to get up, and no one blamed him. He was kneeling, hands clasped in prayer as he looked like he would cry any moment. Morgana never knew any of them to be of any religion, save for Lily and Allie, who hadn't practiced after beginning Hogwarts. Remus looked as if he had gone to services every Sunday of his life and was begging for a favor- 'Just let her come back. Please, give her back.' Then again, what body did she have to go back to? It was so bad Caradoc had made sure that the coffin was sealed with a permanent sticking charm. Apart from the authorities and those who had put her in the coffin, he was the only one who had seen her without having his memory modified. He now stood in the second row, just in Morgana's peripheral view. She turned her head slightly to see him staring at the coffin as if he could see right through it. She was probably burned into his mind.

Lily sniffled from the other side of Sirius, tears streaming down her face. James pulled an arm around her shoulders and Sirius looked up at Morgana, kissing her hand gently. She knew he was imagining her in that wooden box and was torn between relief and mourning. Allie's father stood next to her grandfather and was crying openly. Her mother hadn't even shown up. No one knew where she was. Chris hadn't come either and Morgana hadn't seen her in several days, no one had. She figured she was hiding out at home, still recovering from the memory modification and still paralyzed with grief. No one blamed her in the slightest.

There was silence before the priest said, "We therefore commit Allison's body to the ground; earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust; in the sure and certain hope of the Resurrection to Eternal Life. Amen."

There was a chorus of soft amens and people began to file past, pausing at or touching the casket before leaving the cemetery. Eventually, only the Order members and Allie's father remained, her grandfather hobbling to his beat-up car. Caradoc led the Order members out, each placing a yellow rose on top of the wood. One by one, they left the Marauders, Lily, Morgana, and Mr. Etherson at the grave. Peter limped up to the casket and paused for a full minute before leaving; then James and Sirius stepped up. Sirius leaned forward, kissing his fingers and then touching them to the wood of the casket before he and James went to the car. Lily held her hand out to Morgana and the two stood next to the casket and Morgana was struck with a nauseating thought.

'I will never be this close to Allie ever again.'

She inhaled sharply as images of Allie hit her square on. The memory of Allie at breakfast; Allie and Morgana giggling quietly on the floor in the girls' dormitories, talking about boys and teachers; Allie rolling her eyes at Remus and dangling her toes in the lake; Allie raising her hand in class; Allie groaning as Professor McGonagall handed out an impossibly long assignment; Allie smiling as she kissed Remus; Allie whispering secrets to Chris; Allie looking utterly terrified at the boarding school; Allie, Allie, Allie…

She remembered Allie giving her the stuffed bear on Valentine's Day with the generic "I love you beary much!" card. That card had been taped to Morgana's mirror for the rest of their time at Hogwarts and the two had always found it much funnier than intended. A mere glance at it when the two were in each others' company had sent them into giggles. The thought of it now made Morgana hold back laughter in spite of herself.

"Love you. We won't ever forget you, Al," Lily whispered to the coffin, finished and now waiting for Morgana.

"I… I love you beary, beary much, Allison Etherson, and I always will," Morgana whispered, smiling. Lily squeezed her hand and they followed James and Sirius out of the cemetery, leaving Remus and Mr. Etherson to kneel side-by-side, finding company in each other.

"What are you thinking?" Sirius asked suspiciously when Morgana walked up to them. Her smile had turned into a mischievous smirk and there was a wild gleam in her eyes.

"I was just thinking that Allie's somewhere up there, right? And I was also thinking how much she loved it when you used to pull fireworks pranks… maybe we could send a few up for her tonight. Something so loud she'll be able to hear it and so bright she won't see anything else and so high that it'll almost reach her," Morgana said.

Lily grinned, as did James and Sirius.

"Well, Prongs, do you think we can work up a worthy tribute on such short notice?" Sirius asked.

"Just the two of us? Heavens, no. But maybe if we had two capable witches to help…"

Morgana and Lily exchanged glances and then nodded.

And that night, with all the smoke hanging in the air from the crateful of fireworks, the girls ginned and knew it was precisely what Allie would have wanted.

A/N: Wow. That took an incredibly long time to write and rewrite.

I hope I did the death justice. It's really hard to write about something that you've been fortunate enough not to experience. And, while writers are supposed to be somewhat imaginative, death, especially the death of someone young and close, is sort of an unimaginable thing, even if it is inevitable.

I'm much happier with the way this chapter turned out. Before, when I posted the original version, I didn't feel quite right about it but I thought that I needed to post it since I hadn't updated in so long. Once I saw that someone else noticed it wasn't up to par, I realized, yeah, it needed redoing.

This being something I haven't had a whole lot of experience with, I apologize to anyone who thinks I didn't do it justice. There were so many tears in this chapter and also a lot of… trying to rebuild and beginning to move on. Everyone copes in different ways and I think that the characters in this situation would be really torn because they're all so young and alive, but one of them isn't anymore. And I, personally, wouldn't want a terribly sad and depressing funeral, so I didn't think Allie would either (what teenager wants their friends sobbing all day?) and her friends recognized that and tried to give her a bit of a laugh and a show between their tears.

It should also be said that I sort of wanted to flesh Allie out a bit more before she died, but I think that this was the right time and that she had the right amount of characterization (or perhaps lack thereof). No, we didn't know a whole lot about her before she died, but that didn't make it less significant. And I think that's one of the great realities of war and life, at least as seen in the Potterverse. Look at how Cedric died or how any of the other characters died. We didn't know everything about them and, at times, they were just sort of there as part of the scenery. You don't know what you've got 'til it's gone, and that applies to people as well.

Okay, I think this note has gone on for long enough. I'll direct you over to my profile for more updates because I'll definitely be making them on there.