Author's Note:
"Never understood how she could mean so little to so many. Why does she mean everything to me?" Pins and Needles by Billy Talent
And just so you guys don't get confused, this chapter actually happens 2-3 weeks after the fateful meeting between Hinata and Shinju (and don't worry the bit of a time skip gets explained). If there's any confusion feel free to mentionso in a review or PM me. Disclaimer: Naruto is copyrighted to Kishimoto and Viz
Close Quarters Ch. 15
It was getting to be late in the evening: the sun was casting a warm rose glow over the sands. The sky was already the deep velvet blue of twilight, and the first early stars were already busy twinkling away. The heavens were still dark from the absence of the moon, it being still on the other side of the world. To those who called the Desert their home, it was sunsets like these that were the appreciated beauties of their world of sand and wind. What was more dazzling than seeing the sands change colours from the dying sun before your very eyes under the darkening skies, the whirlwinds of sand being twisters of warm glowing colour? The passionate might even linger on the thought of it being romantic.
Gaara, stuck in his office with his back to the window was too busying cursing the dying light of day to even notice any hint of beauty. Not that he found the idea of sand at all 'pretty', he had used as a weapon for massacre and destruction for too long to see sand as anything but blood-stained. Besides, he had a headache from paperwork and a lovely sunset was the last thing on his mind.
It was bad enough that he had the usual pile of jargon-laden documents to shift through, but he also had to smooth ruffled feathers over the recent assassination of Water Baron Chouseki. That, in its own right, deserved its own separate headache: he was going to rip the idiots responsible for the stupid deed a new one when he finally got a hold of them, if he didn't die first from the exhaustion and of the stabbing headache pains that drove right into his temples like nails.
It was suffice to say that the Kazekage was in a very irritable mood. Most of his staff (even the ones who didn't constantly try to avoid him) had made themselves scarce for the past few days; a smart decision, he had to mentally congratulate them for it – it allowed him some sense of peace and quiet. Of course, though, there had to be someone who couldn't take a little common sense.
And that particular idiot was what most would consider a very attractive young lady – all he saw was a loud, spoiled brat. Shinju had been constantly badgering him and doing the thing Temari called "flirting" (he wasn't still quite sure how that worked) all week. If he was dealing with the Barons it was almost a guarantee that he'd see Shinju, which wasn't all bad if he could steer clear of her most of the time and deal with her in small doses. Lately, though, she seemed to have redoubled her efforts to annoy the hell out of him. She was popping out of nowhere in a room or showing up just around the corner – it was exhausting trying to constantly evade her. So, since avoiding her was no longer working he hid himself in his office with a pair of shinobi at the door with strict orders not to let anyone pass without his say so.
This plan of his worked, but it also meant he was trapped in his very stifling hot office from sunup to sundown. The theory had sounded so much better in his head. It also meant his usual ravenous hunger was constantly gnawing at his stomach. If Temari and Kankuro hadn't been bringing him meals at least twice a day while he was working he could have sworn he would have eaten his desk. Hinata's little leftovers also made great midnight snacks for when he got home late, since he never got home nearly early enough to have dinner. Those small meals in the middle of the night (or in the very early morning in some cases) were lifesavers. Hinata was turning out to be quite useful.
That, of course, was its own problem, and distracted from his supposedly important paperwork. The whole mission mess involving the unknowing Hyuuga was bothering him more than it should. It was a good thing he didn't sleep, because he certainly wouldn't able to, with the cloying "guilt" turning in his stomach at any quiet moment. He couldn't understand what was so difficult – all he had to do was baby-sit the young Hyuuga until it was safe for her to return back to Konoha.
He couldn't reason as to why it bothered him as much it did, but he knew it'd be easier if she hated him. Hinata being so nice all the time, leaving him leftovers, taking care of things around the house – it was strangely comforting, like she just fit into his life into a space that he didn't realize he had. And the fact that she had just somehow nestled herself into such a space was what made his stomach do flip-flops of 'guilt.' If she hated him, then maybe it wouldn't be there, it wouldn't be able justify itself.
He hated the 'guilt;' it made him feel disgusting and it was painful – so he felt quite justified by trying to ease the 'guilt' by getting rid of the situation, and that meant avoiding Hinata. He couldn't feel guilty about having her stay in Suna (when she clearly wanted to go home) if he didn't see her, was his reasoning. It had earned a couple of lectures from Temari, though, about the proper etiquette on treating a guest. He took it without complaint, he knew she wouldn't understand, and neither would Kankuro, or anyone, really. It was just better if he just avoided the Hyuuga, for him and for her.
And having already followed this decision for several weeks Gaara had to admit something – he was still waiting for the 'guilt' to go away.
MWMWMWWMW
Hinata stared accusingly at the cookbook in front of her. It was second hand, with someone else's handwriting in the margins, many of the pages dog-eared, and every rip was taped together. It was a pretty shabby book, not that it really mattered to her. It added character to the little recipe book. It was one of the few things she had purchased in Suna for herself, only at the behest of Temari for her to break down and treat herself once in awhile. The cookbook hadn't been what Temari had in mind, but it got the Sand kunoichi off her back.
Not that Temari had disliked Hinata's choice for very long – only until the Hyuuga had used a recipe from the book. That same night she had been anonymously voted as the cook for the household. Hinata didn't mind; it kept her busy enough and she enjoyed cooking. It was almost fun to see her work her appreciated and discover everyone favourites: Kankuro preferred anything sweet, while Temari liked stews. She had yet to discover Gaara's favourite.
It shouldn't have bothered her as much as it did, it was only the knowledge of his favourite food after all, but it was slowly becoming an unsatisfiable itch. It didn't help that Gaara missed most of his dinners with Kazekage business (she still wondered if she should consider it a blessing or not). The young heiress was beginning to think that her future husband's slim figure was not due to rigorous training regimes. It almost made the mother figure in her want to cluck her tongue in disappointment.
This motherly instinct was what had brought her to scouring through the bedraggled cookbook during the hot afternoons for something that might tempt Gaara to eat a little more. She had even gotten into the habit of leaving leftovers (provided that between Temari and Kankuro there was anything left) or making a small meal to leave in Gaara's room. He of course ate everything that was left for him, but whether it was because of politeness or because of starvation she couldn't tell. It was hard to tell what a person disliked if they left nothing on their plate.
She still hoped that Gaara might specifically ask for a certain food, but she had a better chance of having her father come to his senses and demand her return home. She was also beginning to suspect Gaara of being just a little bit shy. It was a really tiny suspicion though.
"Hey, have you thought up something for dinner tonight?" Temari asked sweetly before hovering the Hyuuga's shoulder in hopes of a hint in the open page that Hinata was studying.
Hinata shook her head. "N-no, not really."
"That's alright. Hey!" Temari's hand reached over Hinata, pointing to a recipe, "Curry! It's been soooo long since we last had some! What do you say?"
Hinata's eyebrows knitted together for a minute in thought, "Doesn't Kankuro hate spicy foods?"
Temari waved a hand in dismissal. "Oh, don't worry about Kankuro. I think he got himself into a small mission or something with Baki. Nothing big, but an all-nighter nonetheless, so he'll miss out on dinner."
"Oh, o-okay. I suppose I can do that," Hinata quickly scanned the ingredient list before adding, "and I think we have all the stuff I'll need here, s-so you won't have to take me shopping, Temari. Is that o-okay?"
"You don't have to sound so worried, Hinata! I've been meaning to do some training anyways, so you just gave me an excellent excuse! If you need me, I'll be downstairs. See you at dinner!" Temari said companionably before rushing off.
Hinata smiled slightly to herself before she started to work on dinner.
MWMWMWMWMWWM
"Delicious!" Temari exclaimed, making Hinata blush at the praise.
"I'm s-so glad you enjoyed it," Hinata said quietly back in response.
"Yeah, well," Temari yawned widely before continued, "As thanks I'll do the dishes."
Temari made to get up, her knees cracking. Hinata instantly waved her to sit down.
"You d-don't have to do that, Temari! You're tired and really should get some rest for tomorrow. I don't mind doing the dishes, so you go right ahead and get some sleep. P-please?" Hinata tried to have some command in her, like a woman of the house was supposed to, but she think she failed somewhere near the end.
Temari gave the Hyuuga a quick glance over before yawning again. "Yeah, I suppose that's okay. Just don't stay up too late, 'kay? Night!"
"Goodnight," Hinata replied softly.
The dining room felt so much colder when Temari left. Dinner had been oddly quiet too, but that probably had to do with the fact that Kankuro wasn't present. Any dinner could be quiet compared to the constant bickering of Temari and Kankuro that accompanied any meal. Not that Hinata minded -- it was refreshing after the stale conversations and heavy silence back at the Main House.
Gaara, predictably, was absent. Hinata had learned not to take it as an insult anymore – Temari insisted that it was unavoidable; Gaara was a young Kazekage who wanted to improve his village but had to fight tooth and nail with gasbag politicians for every inch. Hinata could relate; the unexpected (and unprepared for) short period she had spent as the head of her clan had opened to her eyes to how complicated simple things could be. She remembered many nights going to bed tired and hungry. It was probably ten times worse for a Kazekage.
Might explain why he's so quiet, Hinata thought to herself as she cleared away the plates into the sink.
It must be really hard to trust the people he's working with, wondering whether or not they'll have him assassinated. How are you supposed to have any political allies in a situation like that? The thought Hinata made her shudder. Temari had let it slip how at one point in early Gaara's life when weekly attempt on his life were common. The only difference from then and now was that Gaara's father was no longer at the top of the list to have him killed, and that the attempts were fewer are farther between than they had once been.
Hinata shoved the leftovers into the fridge and closed the door a little more forcefully than necessary. Distracted as she was she didn't really notice or care.
If his father was still around I'd give him a piece of my mind. At least, I wish I could.
The Hyuuga woman sighed disappointedly. Hinata knew herself pretty well, and she knew that she had enough trouble speaking assertively in a polite fashion, and saying something in anger was almost impossible -- if the offer had presented itself she never would have the nerve to seize the chance. When she got angry her throat got all tight and dry, and her tongue felt heavy and thick when she tried to talk sometimes. Then there was that sickly feel that would clench her stomach into nasty knots. No, no matter how revolted Hinata was with the previous Kazekage's behaviour, she knew she would never have the gall to something about to his face had he been alive.
But if he was still alive I wouldn't be here, I would think. And if I wasn't here I probably wouldn't care as much if I do.
The Hyuuga couldn't prevent the spread of a small blush. Silently admonishing herself for her lack of self control, Hinata scrubbed at the dishes harder than she needed to -- so engrossed in her task that she barely noted the shiver the traveled down her spine, the kind your body uses to tell you you're being watched.
"It's late, shouldn't you be asleep?" Gaara asked.
The dish Hinata had been washing fell back into the sink with a wet splash (soaking her front), and she couldn't help but give a small squeak of a surprised gasp. Spinning around Hinata saw an unreadable expression on flit across Gaara's face that may have counted towards disappointment before slipping into its usual unreadable blank look. Leaning against the counter to steady herself (the sudden adrenaline rush was making her shake a little), Hinata asked in a gasp, "G-gaara?! You're h-home early."
The Kazekage squinted at Hinata for a moment before responding, "I'm normally home at this hour."
"O-oh," Was the best thing Hinata could think of.
Gaara narrowed his eyes again, like he was thinking. "I scared you didn't I?" Hinata could hear a hint of sadness in his voice.
"O-oh, n-no! No! You're just s-so …. so quiet, I guess you surprised me. Just a l-little though." Hinata rambled, doing her best to do something, what that something was she had no idea.
The Hyuuga heard a small sigh (the kind that you hear when someone thinks your lying), so soft she wasn't sure she heard it.
"Doesn't explain why you're still awake," Gaara asked disinterested and his eyes roving the kitchen before adding, "You've also been cleaning."
Hinata smiled a little to herself. "Well, j-just a little. I was washing the dishes from dinner." Hinata hesitated before asking softly, "Are you hungry, because I have some leftovers from dinner that you could have. But, if you don't like curry I c-could make you something," she made for fridge as she spoke, "I'm sure I can find something to cook quickly. I think we have s-some eggs or …"
Hinata was almost about to ransack the fridge for a quick meal when Gaara deftly reached around her and snatched the curry from the fridge – she hid a blush when his hand brushed her's accidentally.
"Curry is fine."
Hinata couldn't help but stare at Gaara and the tubberware full of curry he held. The surprised look on the girl's face made Gaara paranoid a little, forcing him to ask, "What? Is there something wrong?"
"You should at least let me reheat it first! Can you even eat curry cold?!" Hinata asked in disbelief, her eyes wide, and a little flare of a blush blooming in her face.
Raising a bare brow, Gaara retorted, "I eat leftover food cold all the time."
"Well you shouldn't! It's good to have a hot meal occasionally!" Losing her sudden gust of bravo Hinata held out her hand shyly, "Could you p-please let me reheat it for you?"
The red-head held a contemplative look for a moment before passing the cold curry to his fiancée. "I suppose it wouldn't hurt."
"T-thank you," The heiress said kindly, turning away from Gaara to reheat the curry leftovers on the stove.
After that neither Hyuuga nor Kazekage made any attempts at conversation, choosing to let them to sit in silence. The only noise that was made was when the spoon Hinata was using to stir the food scraped the bottom of the pan. The dinner was served in silence, and Gaara ate in silence.
Hinata sat across from her fiancé, reflecting quietly to herself about the sudden turn of events, and for the first time she actually didn't mind the silence. She supposed she had gotten used to it; the seemed to be a certain level of comfort in the silence. It was different from the silences back home; where she was expected to stay silent. At the moment she got the impression that it was the exact opposite; she wasn't expected of any protocol. It was nice.
"You don't have to stay up with me," Gaara's voice cut through her thoughts.
Hinata startled to attention. "Wha- ? It's aright, I d-don't mind."
Hinata was sure she caught a glimpse of the 'sad' look on Gaara's face flicker across his features again. "But … you're tired."
Hinata smiled, "A l-little but I'm okay."
A look of confusion flashed in Gaara's eyes. "Why?"
They held eachother's eyes for a long moment, pale violet meeting blue-green, before Hinata dropped her gaze, and shrugged.
"If I'm b-bothering you," she whispered quietly, "I can leave. I'm sure you've had a h-hard day."
The heiress sat poised in her seat, ready to leave at any given signal. She kept her eyes lowered. She looked small.
Gaara felt a twist in his chest. "You're not … bothering me."
Hinata kept her eyes lowered, but her fingers fluttered together to reveal in nervousness. "Are you s-sure?"
"I'm sure," the Kazekage replied, shrugging as he did so. He felt incredibly awkward.
Another long moment hung in the air, the air filled with uncomfortable shifting.
"S-so, uh … d-d-did you have a h-hard day?" Hinata asked quietly, chancing a meek look at Gaara's face, hoping to see some kind of interest.
She was instantly rewarded, the green-blue eyes seemed to glitter a bright blue before disappearing into the lovely, yet, dead-looking, jade green.
"One could say that, I suppose…" said Gaara, vestiges of interest laced into his voice.
A smile tugged at the Hyuuga's lips, "Oh? What h-happened?"
Meeting Hinata's gaze, the red-head chewed his lip in thought before replying, "Well, let me think …."
Author's Note:
This is incredibly late, I know. If you want something to blame, blame school. Oh also feel free to blame CLAMP – I just got addicted to Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle and xxxHolic and spent many sleepless night reading the available online manga for them. If you're not familiar with these two particular stories I highly suggest you go out and read it, like RIGHT NOW! (and out of curiosity, anyone know any decent Tsubasa fics, KuroFai preferably?)
Also, I feel the need to do some major pimpage. The wonderful GaaHina fic "To Change Hyuuga" written by gracemis is now officially completed and the ending is soooo adorable! If you're a true GaaHina fan you NEED to go out and read it. It is such decent GaaHina fic, one of the few I've truly enjoyed.
I hope everyone is happy with this chapter, I had difficulties with it, and I hope the length negates the lateness. I'm happy with the progress though, something is FINALLY going on between Hinata and Gaara ('bout bloody time).