Teardrops

'Come on, Raven, you know I'm hilarious. And I'm not gonna give up until I get you to smile.'

"Hey, Rae," called Beast Boy as he entered the Titan Tower's common room. "How you're doing?"

She glanced up from her book to see the lone other Titan in the room. She gave him a shrug and a flat smile as if to say, 'fine.'

He leaned back into the couch and sighed. "It's a beautiful night," he commented, looking at the twilight outside through the large window.

"It is," she agreed, not trusting herself to say anymore.

Drew looks at me, I fake a smile so he won't see
That I want and I'm needing everything that we should be

"What are you all dressed up for?" asked Raven after a moment, seeing that Best Boy was out of his uniform and was in baggy khaki pants and a dark blue, pinstripe button down shirt.

"Got my big date tonight," said Beast Boy with a playful grin and a wink. Raven glanced away and stared down at the pages of her book, but not really seeing them.

"Where's everyone else?" questioned Beast Boy, scratching the back of his head.

Raven suppressed a grin, which she hid behind her novel, at his forgetfulness.

"Star and Robin have been out all day and Cyborg left about half an hour ago…" Raven explained, suddenly being overwhelmed with sadness that she was the only one who didn't have something to do on a Saturday night.

"Really?" asked Beast Boy.

"You were here when he left," replied Raven with a touch of agitation in her voice. She didn't really mind though….she actually liked that about him. It was endearing in a way, the way he could get so wrapped up in his little world that he saw nothing else. She had once been there, back when her green friend had nothing better to do than to tease and annoy her mercilessly just to get a reaction out of her. She wished she could get back there, but ever since she came back, his whole world was refocused.

I'll bet she's beautiful, that girl he talks about
And she's got everything that I have to live without

'You know, you're kind of funny.'

'You think I'm funny?'

"Rae, why did the cookie go to the doctor?" Beast Boy joked playful, breaking Raven from her thoughts. "Because he felt crummy!" Beast Boy burst into a fit of giggles.

"You've told me that one already and it's not funny," retorted Raven dryly. Beast Boy glared at her, but he wasn't really mad.

Drew talks to me, I laugh cause it's so damn funny
That I can't even see anyone when he's with me

"So how has it been with Terra since regained some of her memories?" asked

Raven as nonchalantly as possible.

"Oh my gosh, it's been great. I've never felt this way before, even the first time around. It feels weird, but it feels good. Do you know what I mean…"

Raven avoided his eyes, silent. "No," she replied quietly.

Beast Boy's face fell slightly, realizing this might be a hurtful topic to his friend. The only time she thought she was in love was the incident with Malchior and he had used and betrayed her…

"Don't worry about it, Raven," he said, trying to reassure her.

"I'm not," she retorted, trying to appear uninvested, but she obviously didn't fool her green friend.

"Look, Rae," he placed a hand on her shoulder. She jumped in shock and he withdrew it hastily, misinterpreting her reaction as anger. "You're a good person. You'll find someone."

She wanted to answer, 'I already have, but he's taken,' but she didn't.

"Like you found Terra," she replied, trying to hide her bitterness.

"Yup," he replied with a smile, "But speaking of Terra, I have to get going or I am going to be late."

Beast Boy hoped off the coach and was heading out the door. "Bye Rae," he called over his shoulder.

He says he's so in love, he's finally got it right,
I wonder if he knows he's all I think about at night

Raven sat on the couch after Beast Boy left for his date. She watched the sky outside get progressively dark. She threw her book aside on the couch, unable to pay attention to it and got up and walked to the window.

She placed her hand against the cool glass and looked out into the night sky. A single shone out among the few others that hadn't been dimmed by the city lights. It was a wishing star. Beast Boy had pointed one out several weeks ago and Starfire had become obsessed with them.

Raven didn't believe in wishes. She knew what real magic was and silly superstitions like stars and broken mirrors and wish bones meant nothing. They had no power, but the little, childishly naive part of her was taking over tonight and she didn't care if it was silly.

"Please," she whispered, her breath fogging the glass as she did so for she was so close. "Please, let him realize that I'm right here…"

She tried to control herself. She closed her eyes and breathed slowly to stop her imminent tears. She gasped, and one slowly rolled down her face. "Because I love him…"

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do

It was a week later and nothing had changed…in fact, it had only gotten worse. Too many times had she seen Beast Boy and Terra… laughing together, kissing, just plain being together and being happy. She was jealous and it was eating away at her guts. If she truly loved him she would just want Beast Boy to be happy, but… she wanted him to be happy with her.

"Oh… sorry." Beast Boy had accidentally collided with her as they walked in opposite directions in the hallway. She stumbled as her book was knocked out of her hands and her papers scattered over the floor. Beast Boy steadier her with a hand. His touch stopped her breath.

Raven dropped to a kneel and hastily began collecting her scattered things.

"Let me help you with that," he said, squatting across from her with ease. He was surprisingly graceful at times, noted Raven, it must be the animal thing.

"Again, sorry about the collision," he apologized, giving her a genuine grin that Raven never could have worn.

Drew walks by me, can he tell that I can't breathe?
And there he goes, so perfectly,
The kind of flawless I wish I could be

"What's this?" asked Beast Boy as he examined a piece of paper he picked up. "Part of your diary or something?"

Raven quickly snatched the paper out of his hands, but didn't answer his question.

"I can handle the rest," she whispered, avoiding his eyes. "You can go."

"O-kay," he said hesitantly, before getting up and walking away, giving Raven a backwards glance over his shoulder.

After Beast Boy disappeared around the corner Raven released the paper that she had clutched to her chest and read a few of the lines she had written just a night ago… "I know that I can't have him. I know he's with her, so all I can do is hope that she treats him right because he, of all people, deserves it."

She'd better hold him tight, give him all her love
Look in those beautiful eyes and know she's lucky cause

'So...he was the one who hurt you, right? Not me?'

'He broke into the Tower to attack you ...and wound up attacking me too.'

'I can't believe I ate meat. I acted like a jerk. I'm sorry.'

'You weren't yourself.'

Unbeknownst to Raven, Beast Boy had caught a few words before she had torn the journal entry from his hands. He saw enough to know… "I can't help it, I'm in love with Beast Boy…"

He knew the words were real because tear stains had smudged the ink in several places. It wasn't your typical love note with hearts drawn in the margins, not that Beast Boy had received many of those, but it felt more real than anything he could have expected. Especially since it was from Raven.

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do

More days passed. Raven got more withdrawn, but the other Titans saw little difference in her behavior. They were only surprised when they noticed Beast Boy get withdrawn too. He stopped making stupid jokes at the breakfast table. He stayed in his room alone for long periods of time. He kept blowing off Terra, saying he was busy or needed time to think despite the fact that he was crazy about her just a week or two ago.

Beast Boy drove home alone on his moped not many nights later. He had just had a terrible night. To put it plainly Terra had just broken up with him for, how did she put it, 'being a jerk that is ignoring me.' He wasn't sure it was the best reason, but he had to admit it was his fault. The fact is it still hurt. He cared for her deeply, but ever since he saw what Raven wrote about him… he couldn't get her off of his mind.

After parking in the garage he went up to his messy room. He paused on his way to the bed. He picked up a framed photograph from a year or two ago of the whole team sitting eating at their favorite pizza parlor. Just before the picture was taken, he had thrown his arm around Raven's shoulder which explains why Raven was glaring at him instead of looking at the camera. Boy, was that a painful experience. He smiled at the memory.

He didn't know Raven was looking at her own copy of the picture in her room. She stared down at Starfire and Robin holding hands, Cyborg giving a thumb's up and Beast Boy's goofy grin next to her scowl. They would never go together…

Raven slammed the frame onto her cabinet face down. She collapsed onto her bed a moment later and stared out the window at the stars shining, thinking absently, 'Why didn't my wish work…?'

So I drive home alone, as I turn out the light
I'll put his picture down and maybe
Get some sleep tonight

'Raven? It's me. Look. I'm sorry.'

'For what? You're not the one who-'

' No. I'm sorry that...he broke your heart.'

' I know it was all a lie. But he was the only person who ever made me feel like I wasn't...creepy. And don't try to tell me I'm not.'

'Okay. Fine. You're way creepy. But that doesn't mean you have to stay locked in your room. You think you're alone, Raven, but you're not.'

He was standing outside her door. He could sense her sobs with his animal sharp hearing. He leaned his back against the door and slumped to the floor, too afraid to knock. Afraid to embarrass her and afraid of her rejection.

Raven was ashamed of herself for losing control of her emotions, but she had been holding them in for so long. When she started crying a vase across her room exploded, her bookcase trembled as many books fell from the shelves on the floor. But after a while it was if her powers just shorted out and nothing else, as far as she could tell, was disturbed despite her tears.

Hekept one ear to the door all night long, even after her sobs ceased and she fell into what Beast Boy assumed was sleep. He wasn't going to get a wink of sleep this night.

Raven kept her arms ramped around her middle as she trembled. She was unaccustomed to crying, so it wasn't long until she had run out of tears and her head and body ached from the exhaustion of it all. She didn't get a wink of sleep that night.

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only one who's got enough of me to break my heart
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do

'You stayed? I thought you didn't like me.'

'Thought you didn't like me.'

Morning dawned early for the two sleepless Titans. Eyes red from intense crying and lack of sleep, Raven crossed her room, pulling up her hood as she did so, not wanting her friends to see her razzled appearance.

However, to her surprise, when the door to her room slid open, a certain green titan feel through backwards.

He looked up at her from wear he laid on the ground with tired eyes. "Hey Rae," he mumbled.

"What are you doing here?" she asked in a hushed tone.

He pushed himself off the ground before answering, "I wanted to make sure you were okay."

"I'm fine," she answered automatically even though it was a lie. "But why?" she added after a moment, finding Beast Boy's concern this early in the morning weird.

"Because…" he paused, then the next words he said fell off his lips, completely true, but almost unconscious, "I love you."

They were both shocked. Beast Boy knew the second he said it was no lie. Why else would have also tried to be her annoying little friend despite her blatant disinterest in his attempts.

"Wha- what?" she stuttered.

"You heard me," he replied, taking a step closer to her. "And I know you love me too."

He's the time taken up, but there's never enough
And he's all that I need to fall into…

She was backed against the wall now, looking up at her green counterpart who somehow unnoticeably grew taller than her over the last year and a half. He reached tentatively forward and pulled her hood down off her head. She made no move to stop him.

Her hair was still mussed from a restless night in bed, there were dark circles under eyes, and she definitely did not look her best.

Drew looks at me, I fake a smile so he won't see

'We're having a moment here. Don't ruin it.'

Beast Boy cupped Raven's face in his warm hands and drew her face towards his until their lips met.

"You don't have to hide anymore," he whispered to her after their mouths broke apart.

She didn't speak but just let a timid, small grin appear on her lips. Beast Boy smiled back, he understood that despite how little it showed on the surface, Raven was beaming inside. Raven understood that now Beast Boy could see it… see her…

"You love me?" she asked in a whisper.

He nodded before rest his forehead against the shorter girl's.

"I love you too."