IN A SHOT

Rating Teen

Spoilers None

Disclaimer I wish they were mine but they belong to CBS

Thanks Grateful thanks to my wonderful Beta Calypso and support form Unspoken and Sara Sidle –Grissom

This is my first fic , please review . is it worth doing another?

IN A SHOT

In a shot glass the amber liquid looked so inviting. It would numb the senses, dull the pain, and make him forget… Yes make him try and forget.

But he did not want to forget her.

His Sara.

The moment she came into his life all those years ago, then again years later when he called her to come and help. He could not forget. Every day she was there for him to see, to be close to, yet they were so far apart.

How could he forget her, he mused as he looked at the glass in his hands with that brown amber liquid.

Those eyes so brown and gentle when she looks at you. Glimpses of tenderness, kindness, and humanity.

The ice melted slowly as it swirled and softly clinked against the side of the glass.

Each look she gives you, each word spoken. They thaw you from the core of your being until it warms and fires those feelings to new heights.

He took a long taste as the liquid slowly hit the back of his throat.

She lights up the room when she enters, you know your heart picks up a beat. Her gaze captures your thoughts, your mind……your heart?

The myriad of flavors that danced across his taste buds paved the way to familiar thoughts:

Nothing to offer…

To old…

Esteemed Career…

Not wanted…

Supervisor …

I couldn't do it.

He felt the warmth as it slid down into the pit of his stomach.

Softness and tenderness, the wave of crashing emotions with one single touch across my cheek. This is what you do to me Sara!

Grissom looked at the empty glass and slowly placed it by the bottle. He gazed intently at it.

It was a never ending question, and with it came a long sigh of resignation.

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In a shot his head snapped up at her voice.

"Hey, Grissom. We're all going for breakfast. You coming? Come on, it's been a while. We might even get Greg to pay!"

There she was leaning against the door frame as usual with her head tilted to one side and her smile which always seemed to beckon.

"Err... Um well, I don't know I've still got all this paperwork and then..."

He took off his glasses rubbing the spot were they had been. He couldn't do it, something as simple as breakfast. When was the last time they all went out after one of those cases? The kind that made them all just wanted to be together. Not talk about it, but just to feel that every one there understood and tuck into some well deserved pancakes. He couldn't remember the last time he went, even though they always asked him.

No…Sara always asked him, but the excuse was always the same, He couldn't do it.

A chuckle came from no where. She had asked him once to dinner and he had turned her down. That was it, he was safe.

But he just realized she had never stopped asking.

He had never realized until now. The team went out on a regular basis for breakfast, not every week but it was a fairly regular occurrence. He never went. He had a number of things he told himself: they would not want the boss, to much work to do, exhaustion, Sara would be there.

But they never stopped asking.

Sara always asked. A quick request as she leaned against the door just before they left. She always told him, "Oh well if you change your mind we'll all be there."

Looking down at the desk with its myriad of papers and folders and then staring up at the empty door, a smile crossed his face.

She had never stopped asking…

Quickly he shut the folder placing the pen carefully on top. This could wait until tonight.

Why not?

Breakfast with the team would be good, and it had been a while anyway. Flicking the switch he exited quickly. He would make it this time, pancakes and syrup, laughter and discussion, and a chance. A chance to look at her smile.

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In a shot he had paid for the tickets.

Two top price tickets for an evening concert with the London Philharmonic Orchestra. It was a small price to pay.

He had heard her talking with Nick while they were sifting through a pile dust and debris looking for the smallest piece of evidence on their case a week ago.

"Really Sara, I didn't think you would be in for that kind of stuff…"

"Yeah, Nicky. If you get the chance you should try and go …"

It had been there, mixed up with what each were going to do that weekend, the moans about Ecklie's latest memo, and the satisfaction of them both when they came across that small but important piece of evidence that they had been looking for.

Grissom smiled to himself.

I wonder?

They had not even seen him pass by the evidence lab.

Over the previous three months he had started to go more frequently with the team for breakfast. Sometimes a case would prevent him from attending but more often, when Sara passed and asked, he would tell her to go with the group and he would follow once he had finished. He had forgotten how good it was to sit and take time. He had to admit to himself that he enjoyed theses times.

And so there he was actually waiting for Sara to pass his office this morning.

"Grissom were going for a quick bite, are you up for the pancakes today?"

"Um ….Sara… Yeah, sure in a minute. But um, I have something for you."

"Oh?" A look of surprise and intrigue crossed her face.

"Um…Look…"

"Grissom?"

Taking a breath he passed her the envelope.

"Here, this is for you. I believe it is your birthday next week and I um, I um… wondered if…"

He couldn't do it. Sara looked at him with confusion. She tried to figure out what she could see in his eyes. Taking the envelope and asking tentatively, "Can I open this now?"

"Yes, if you want." Was all he could reply.

"What have I done?" Was all he could think. "What will she think of me?"

"Grissom! What? No. How did you? "

The shocked response was not one he had expected, but the look on her face as she gave him one of those smiles made his heart miss a beat.

Inside the envelope was the carefully placed concert ticket with a small hand written card, in the most carefully scripted writing. An invitation to the opening night of the concert, followed by supper at Pepo's.

Grissom stood there, the red quickly spreading up his neck and face. He couldn't look at her, but he felt such warmth glow from within him as he realized that she really liked it.

"This is too kind. Why? You don't have to do this," she said, shaking him from his thoughts.

With a small smile, Grissom took in the wishful expression on her face.

"Explanation," he thought. "I need to give her an explanation."

To anyone this would be one small step. But one small step to what? Happiness? Contentment? With trepidation he took a breath.

"It's for your Birthday. I know it's the night of the concert and I…um. I thought you might like to go." He told her.

Sara slowly looked at the card and gently stroked the scripted words that were so elegantly written by Grissom. She wondered how long it must have taken him to write those few simple words.

"This is so fantastic," she said, looking at him with delight spread over her face. Her eyes met his now. Shining from them was a look of expectancy. "I would love to go."

And so it was that seven days later Grissom was standing outside Sara's door, feeling almost giddy. Excitement and a happy anticipation pulsed through him.

When Sara opened the door both pairs of eyes met each other instantly. The investigators in each of them observed the other for a split second, both smiles radiating a warmth and affection guided towards the other.

For both of them, the rest of the evening was an experience of sensory overload. There was a beautiful intermingling of music, food, small talk and a closeness that was almost foreign to them. A night in which whether he realized it or not, Grissom would not be able turn back from.

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In a shot his heart finally succumbed over his head he could not fight the feelings that he had for her. He did not want to fight theses feelings anymore. He wanted to feel them. He wanted to share them.

The weeks that followed Sara's birthday had started an unspoken pattern of time together. Nothing major, things like a comment about a new exhibit, or a new show in town. Pleasant times spent by two work colleagues escaping form the overwhelming realities of their emotionally crushing working lives.

Grissom was deep in thought at the end of the shift. Paperwork never lessened. Either did Eckie's memos. He was brought back by a quiet cough.

"Hey, we've all finished for the night Grissom. That okay? "

He looked up at her. Even after a hard shift she looked so…He felt a small laugh deep within him. Another moment of realization.

"Sara, I wonder, you're not on tonight are you? There's a new vegetarian restaurant not far from me. Would you like to go for some dinner there? They have an opening special on." He asked cautiously.

"Yeah, Grissom. That would be really nice. I'm always on the lookout for a new place to eat." She replied.

"I've got tonight off as well," he blurted out. He was stunned at what he had just said, and concerned that she would be taken aback by his forwardness.

But he was rewarded with a smile.

"Always looking out for me eh? That would be wonderful. When would you like to meet up?" She asked.

"How about seven?" He replied. "I'll pick you up its no bother."

At exactly seven, Sara heard a knock on her door. She opened it to find Grissom, waiting like a teenager nervous for his first date.

"It's only friends going out to share a meal," he told himself. "Not a date."

The evening was enjoyable for both of them. They talked about food and friends, wine, and even a little work. By the time they had finished, the candles'dancing flames on the table had become a low slow seductive waltz. The flames reflection caught in Sara's eyes mesmerized Grissom. What was that he could see within those flames?

After the meal, Sara suggested they walk for a bit.

"It helps to digest," she stated plainly.

So they walked and talked, and observed people. Returning to the car and driving home, Grissom found himself wishing that the night would never end. Grissom had insisted on making sure that Sara got to her door safely, against her wishes.

"Grissom, thanks for tonight. I had a wonderful time," she began. "Would you like to come in for coffee?"

"Thanks, Sara, but I think I should be going."

"Oh, okay then," she replied. "Thanks again for tonight." She turned to find the key to undo the lock.

Grissom turned to go, and then stopped, turning to face her again. He could deny it no longer to himself, he was falling, no, he had fallen for her. Hopelessly and totally.

"Sara," he said, looking up into her eyes where he saw all of his emotions being lovingly wrapped up and reflected back to him. It was the most wonderful present a person could get: unconditional love.

Slowly he stepped towards her .Without breaking eye contact; he gently placed his hand on hers. He asked ever so quietly, "Is there still an offer of coffee?"

Sara never broke his gaze. She saw in that moment, something that she thought she would never see. His emotions had won out over his brain, and he was allowing himself to feel.

She could feel the passion that emanated from Grissom as his hand gently cupped her cheek. She slowly closed her eyes as she leaned into it, savoring his presence. When she opened her eyes again, he was still looking at her. He was closer in distance now. It could be measured in millimeters instead of inches.

Whose lips touched whose first did not matter, but at that moment as they both physically crossed the door threshold, another was crossed between them in mind, body, and soul.

In the darkness of the night in a small place within Las Vegas two people found what belonging could mean. One finally released the emotions held back for so long, like a dam bursting unable to hold back any longer. The other found the love and caring she had long awaited.

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In a shot things could change forever. The noise of a gun was heard before the searing pain ripped through his chest. The force hurtled him backwards crashing him against the wall.

The sound of distant shouts. Brass? Catherine? Sara?

Where's Sara, I need Sara…

"Sara," he whispered, as he started to loose all sense of reality.

"Gil, hold on! It's going to be okay," Catherine told him, as calmly as she could. She was by his side trying to stem the flow of blood. He was almost shocked that such a small, insignificant piece of metal could cause so much harm and grief.

"Sara," he gulped. Sara, I need Sara." Confusion filled Catherine's eyes as she scans his pale face.

What did he say?

Suddenly she realized. The little pieces of a jigsaw that she had seen over the previous months and thought nothing of suddenly tumbled into place.

"It's okay. You'll be fine, Gil. It's all right." She noticed something that she'd never seen in his eyes: a plea. She turned her face quickly, trying to scan the scene to where other people should be. She called out to the figures franticly that were rushing towards her.

"Sara. I need Sara." His plea was more frantic. Catherine looked at Gil and saw that his laboured breath also brought urgency.

"Gil, it fine. The paramedics are on the way. Don't worry."

He tried to keep his eyes focused as they darted from her, trying to find who he wanted to see.

"She's coming. Sara's coming. Don't worry." Catherine told him in an attempt to reassure him.

At that moment she heard another cry form behind, but this was one of anguish.

"Griss, no. Oh no." Sara flew to his side, kneeling in the growing pool of his blood. She seemed unaware of Catherine who was supporting Grissom, and Brass who had followed just behind after the shots rang out.

At that moment he found his focus, and brown and blue eyes locked together. Their eyes conveyed a myriad of emotions: pain, anguish, regret and fear all mingled together with adoration and compassion that only they could feel.

"Sara," he whispered from his now blue tinged lips.

"Hey," Sara spoke with an amount of love and compassion that only two soul mates could comprehend. Her red gloved hand gently smoothed his hair, his blood running over her fingers.

"I 'm sorry Sara," he managed to say.

As tears threatened, Sara continued to tenderly stroke his cheek.

"It ok Griss, the paramedics are here. Come on, you've got to stick with me now."

A smile that conveyed more than any sonnet could, appeared across his face.

In the flurry of activity that happened over the next few minutes; clothes that were cut, IV lines inserted, dressings applied, and oxygen masks fitted, Grissom's eyes never left Sara's.

"We need to take him now, you need to let us take him," she heard the paramedics say with some urgency.

Brass gently put a hand on her shoulder and said, "Come on, you can ride with me."

With hearts pounding and not a word spoken, blue and red lights constant, they followed so close behind you would have thought they were attached by an unseen umbilical cord.

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In a shot Lindsay's hand grabbed the bouquet as it flew through the air, making sure to elbow Greg in the ribs which drew laughter from everyone.

Sara was not one for tradition, but pressure from all around made her throw the bouquet. Tradition from an untraditional couple. The gathering was not large; it was just their friends from the lab with one or two others, at their favourite Italian restaurant which they had booked for the night.

Grissom stood, gazing at Sara. Those who were looking at him could see the awe and wonder he had for her, the love that he so freely expressed in something as simple as a smile across a room.

From the bedside proposal in the hospital and over the months of recuperation, Grissom found the love he had grown with each passing day. Here today in front of his friends was an affirmation of that growth, and his love.

The music was soft as Grissom slowly walked across the room, a smile widening across his face.

"I wonder if Mrs. Grissom would care for a dance."

With that he held out his hand and slowly fingers were intertwined and bodies moved together in time to the melody.

Neither was aware that they were the only one dancing. No one wanted to invade this private moment. Their friends all smiled at the couple who for years danced around each other, as they finally dancing in tune. As the music slowly finished a chorus of applause rang out. Grissom and Sara looked round, an embarrassed smile spread across their faces at the attention received.

From the group, Brass' voice could be heard bringing all to raises their glasses to the couple.

"To Grissom and Sara," was the chorus.

In Brass's hand Grissom saw a glass of Amber liquid and he remembered. An invitation taken up, his heart liberated, it made him remember, and he never wanted to forget.

FIN