"Um . . . Murtagh?" a very nervous me muttered, which was very rare.

The eldest son of Morzan was sitting on the living couch watching a music video of 'My Chemical Romance'. (BEST FUCKIN BAND EVER

"What?"

I stuck my hands into the pockets of my baggy pants and shifted from foot to foot uneasily, something I did when I was nervous, which like I said, was VERY rare.

"You know how Thorn's been missing for a couple months now?" I began.

Murtagh nodded.

"Remember that casino in Las Vegas I went to a few months ago?" I continued.

"Yeah, why?" he asked, looking wary.

"Well . . . we sorta ran out of money to bet on so we sorta bet on something . . ." I added.

Murtagh's HOT eyes turned dark and cold. "What exactly did you use for the bet?"

"Ha. . . funny story actually." I laughed anxiously. "We kinda . . . sorta . . . used . . . Thorn . . . and I kinda lost the bet . . ."

"WHAT!?" Murtagh yelled, rattling the house.

"I'm sorry! I just had to have that jet! You don't see a dragon everyday so a dragon's worth more then a jet!" I whined.

"YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE A DRIVERS LICENSE! HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU DRIVE A FUCKIN JET WITHOUT A FUCKIN LICENSE!?" Murtagh screeched.

I grinned sheepishly, revealing the sky-blue braces on my teeth. "Yeah . . . another funny story about that . . . I sorta used your motorcycle to get a pilot for the jet . . . but . . . I kinda lost that bet too . . ."

"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!?" Murtagh yelled, flailing his arms in the air for emphasis. "WHY DIDN'T YOU USE ERAGON FOR THE BET?!"

"Who the hell's gonna want a pansy ass, fucked up, little dipshit like Eragon?!" I spat with my hands on my hips.

Murtagh dropped his head into his hands. "What was the bet?"

"Whoever could get three aces in a row." I muttered.

"YOU KNOW DAMN WELL THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!" Murtagh screamed.

"JET, MURTAGH! WHO THE FUCK DOESN'T WANT A JET?!" I yelled back.

Something breaking brought us back to reality. We turned around slowly to see Eragon standing at the doorway with a shattered vase at his feet. His eyes got wide with fear when my eye started to twitch.

Brom—who had been reading a cook book on the couch—jumped to the feet. "HOLY CRAP! RUN FOR YOUR SHITY LIFE ERAGON!"

Eragon screamed and ran out of the room with me running after him with an axe in my hand. "HELP ME! SHE'S GONNA KILL ME!" Everyone except Heather cheered happily at the thought of a dead Eragon. "YOU PEOPLE ARE SO MEAN!" he burst into tears and ran to his room like the little pansy school girl he was.

"Good go-in Shannon! You mad the poor boy cry!" Heather snapped.

"You want this thing lodged up in your face again?" I snarled, holing the axe up menacingly.

Heather rolled her eyes. "Whatever, I just wanted to say that some random guy keeps leaving these love notes in my room. Have any clue who keeps writing them?"

I looked over at Murtagh, who shook his head.

"Not me, I got over her ages ago." He said.

Galbatorix—who was watching golf on TV—stiffened and walked away while whistling an 'innocent' tune.

"GROSS!" I screamed. "MY SISTER'S BEING STALKED BY AN OLD GUY!"

Brom cringed in disgust and Murtagh ran out of the room to hurl. "That is just so wrong!" the 'chief' muttered, looking slightly green. "Uh, somebody's gonna have to clean that vomit!" he darted out of the room to leave the creepy moment.

"Wait for me!" I cried and shot after him. "I might just hurl myself." I shuttered at the though of Galbatorix stalking me like my big sister.

The doorbell rang, so I walked to the front door to open it to see a teenage boy. "Who the hell are you?"

"Yeah, somebody ordered forty peanut butter, clam, onion, olive, anchovies, and pineapple, hold the cheese pizzas?" the guy asked, holding stacks of pizzas in his arms.

"The hell? I didn't order any pizza!" I snapped.

"Those are mine!" Durza appeared out of nowhere and took the pizzas. "Take care of the check, will you Shannon?" he darted away while cackling evilly.

"DON'T CALL ME SHANNON!" I yelled after him before looking at the price. "$356?! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE!?"

The guy shrugged. "Look lady, I didn't order the pizzas. I'm just do-in my job, so pay up."

Brom came over to the door, looking hurt. "How could you order pizza when I made a beautiful super of roast?" He held up a cooking pot with unknown, possibly deadly glop.

"THAT'S IT! I'M GOING TO THE CHATROOM!" I darted to my room, flopped down onto my bed, and grabbed my laptop. My fingers danced through the keys like a breeze, thanks to those countless years of keyboarding classes at school.

Hotspot has logged in

Hotspot: Crap, no ones on (Virtual cursing)

Dark&Mysterious has logged in

... has logged in

Dark&Mysterious: Wow, temper issues

Hotspot: Shut up Tag

Dark&Mysterious: How'd you know it was me?

Hotspot: Kinda obvious, isn't it?

Dark&Mysterious: Yeah, guess you're right

Hotspot: I thought Eragon was the brain dead brother!?!?

Dark&Mysterious: He is, it's just the thought of Galby be a stalker that makes me insane

Hotspot: I'm with you on that

IKILLYOU has logged in

Hotspot: And speak of the devil

IKILLYOU: MAAAAAUUUUUHHHHHHHAAAAAHAA(coughhackcough)AHAHAAA!!!!

Dark&Mysterious: Oh Christ . . .

Hotspot: Since when are you religious????

Dark&Mysterious: I'm not

Hotspot: Oh, good point (A/N don't get the wrong picture here, I AM religious!)

IKILLYOU: HEY! PAY ATTENTION TO ME!!!!1111

Hotspot: Oh god, he has discovered the power of caps lock

Dark&Mysterious: Great, now he's ten times more annoying

Hotspot: This can't get anymore irritating

Shadyshadeshade has logged in

Hotspot: I was wrong

Dark&Mysterious: You were very, very, very, wrong

Hotspot: Deeply wrong

Shadyshadeshade: Hi, daisies!!!!1111

Hotspot: Oh god. Please shoot me Tag

Dark&Mysterious: As long as you shoot me at the same time

Hotspot: Deal

Hotspot had logged off to find a gun

Dark&Mysterious has logged off to help her

IKILLYOU: Ah, to be young and in love

Shadyshadeshade: Eh? Wat u men?

Old&Wise has logged in

Old&Wise: He means that their perfect for each other

Shadyshadeshade: Eh?

…: A WEDING! YEAHS!!!111

Old&Wise: HOLY SHIT! WHERE DID YOU COME FROM??!!!

…: i hav ben listening for a long tim

IKILLYOU: You mean you were spying?

…: no, i been listening wen you don't know

Shadyshadeshade: Eh?

Old&Wise: Yes, that was spying

IKILLYOU: GET HIM!

Back to me:

I, on the other hand, wasn't having much luck in finding my dad's hunting guns. Murtagh was searching in the closet while I was looking under the bed when we heard a battle cry and a thud. We both shared a glance before darting out of my parents' room and stared at the scene dumbstruck.

Galbatorix and Eragon were wrestling on the ground, not like son vs. dad, but idiot vs. maniac, your choose of who was who. They were rolling down the hallway, pummeling each other while Brom joined us in staring. Durza was wailing that he wanted coffee but I'll be damned if I give that retard caffeine! Arya and Heather had gotten into a slap fight cause Heather had caught Arya staring at her boyfriend. Thorn had strangely appeared outside the window—probably got tired of Las Vegas and Saphira was fighting him for a bone.

Yep, this was my idiotic, deathtrap home. I lived with a brain dead blonde, a craze ex-King, a butt-ugly elf, a wimpy Shade, a preppy, annoying older sister, two dog-like lizards, and a hot ass guy—

Murtagh suddenly turned to me. "Wanna make out?"

My eyes went wide. "Sure."

—make that a hot ass guy that was now my boy friend. But, even though we had our insane days and always got into trouble, they were my family and this was my house, my strange, abnormal family in my—our deadly house.

And if you have a problem with that, I just have one thing to say to you. "Get out of my house!"

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Well, that was the end of My House. I know this chapter probably sucked and this story was unbearably short but I ran out of ideas and I have millions of other stories to finish. Please don't forget to leave a review on your way out! Laters!