EXPLANATION: This is a story about Roxas. He cries a whole lot. This is a joint fanfiction. The bolded and un-bolded text signifies when there is a new author to the story. Writing a summary would be meaningless because we don't understand what's happening either.

DISCLAIMER: DigitalR does not hold the rights to Kingdom Hearts, or anything pertaining to it. We do own Derudesu and Ricotorix, though. Yes, yes we do.

Roxas! Roxas? Roxas.

Hello my name is Roxas, I have awesome hair. I think that I'm Jesse McCartney. I am an awesome singer. Hayner thinks I'm a bonehead.

(cry)

Ok, I'm better now. Have you ever tried sea salt ice cream? I have. It's goooooooooood! People think that it's a popsicle 'cause it's on a popsicle stick, but it's not. It's ice cream. Haha! (Licks ice cream)

Sooooooooo…. I was walking to school today. And it was weird. 'Cause this chick in a white dress came and said that she hated me. And then she took my ice cream.

(cry)

Why would someone do that? WHY??? So I sang her a mean song. She ran away and came back with this guy that had a mane of silver hair. He was full of anger. I could tell. And then he beat me up. It hurt so much. What kind of person would hurt a hot teen singer?

(cry)

So after that the guy with the mane of silver hair picked up the girl in the white dress and threw her at me. It hurt a whole lot. Then the guy said "Oh my god I hate you both you're so stupid."

I'm not stupid. I know that….

(cry)

Then he walked away. When I got to school, my BFF Jill… I mean Sora, came up to me and said "OMG! Roxas u just missed it! Kairi just fell in front of everybody! ROTFLOL!" Sora is such an idiot who thinks he can speak IM, but he can't.

Then I said, "Shouldn't you have helped her?"

"No, I hate Kairi. Nobody cares when she talks."

Kairi heard this, and came up to us, all mad. She thought I was Sora and punched me.

(cry)

So I said "Heeeeeeeeey, that hurt, Kairi." So Kairi said, "Oh, you're not Sora, you're that whiney kid who looks like him."

So then I stared at her. "Ew, stop staring at me, perv!"

So I looked away. I am not a pervert.

(cry)

My morning classes went by fast. Despite all the times I had to go to the nurse because I kept getting punched. Man, Sora gets in trouble a lot! Soon, it was lunch. I was sitting with Hayner, Sora, Riku, and Pence.

I told Riku, "Gee, this guy with silver hair attacked me this morning." I bothered me that I didn't know who it was. Again, who could hate me?

(cry)

Then Hayner said, "Man, Roxas, you're a real bonehead if you don't know that –"

Pence cut him off before he could finish talking. How rude!

"Keep it to yourself," said Pence, "It just shows how much of a bonehead he is if he doesn't know."

Then everyone laughed. I hate it when people keep stuff from me.

(cry)

After lunch I had gym. Isn't it gay to have gym right after lunch? Dumb guidance counselor. This girl with blonde hair had to be my partner. She looked like that girl in that white dress this morning. I'm not sure. Nah, can't be. We were doing relays and she tripped me.

(cry)

Anyway, after that, I had to go to the nurses office again because I was bleeding from my knee, and school officials become paranoid at the sight of blood. I got a bandage and was informed that the period had already ended. So I headed to my next "class."

It was that one teacher's class who I hate, I can't remember her name. I walked into the classroom and she yelled, "YOU'RE SO FREAKIN' LATE!!" And then she threw an eraser at me.

(cry)

Can she even do that? Seriously. Sora was in this class. It was for "special" people. Actually it was detention. We sit in a blank room and do homework all day. I still couldn't remember the teacher's name.

"What's your name?" I honestly didn't know.

"Read the board, Roxas."

"R-Ric-Ricotorziky?" I can't read that good. I can read, though. How else could I read my song lyrics?

"Ms. Ricotorix."

"…Cool."

She got mad and threw yet another eraser at me.

(cry)

Anyway, Ms. Ricotorix said, "Let's do roll call and make sure all you delinquents are here." She took out a clipboard and started calling names. Then I fell asleep, because I had no food inside of me.

I suddenly felt something hard collide with my head.

"MISTER KYOMOTO, WAKE THE HELL UP," yelled Ms. Ricotorix.

Now I have to go to the nurses office again for some ice to take down the swelling on my head. And then I went to my guidance counselor because Ms. Ricotorix couldn't stand me being in her class anymore.

(cry)

Since when the hell were teachers allowed to swear? Oops, I did! In my head. Nooooooo! I wished I hadn't gone to the guidance counselor. She was crazy, and made no sense. I walked in at the wrong time. She was doing some bizarre yoga stretches. I got kicked in the face. Again.

(cry)

Well, after she kicked me in the face, I moved the ice from my head to my face and her expression changed from an angry one to a happy one. She said, "Oh! It's Sora Hikaru! You wanted to change your classes to all the ones Kairi is in! I've got all the papers ready right here…."

I said, "Oh, Ms. Derudesu, I'm not Sora, I'm Roxas."

She stared at me blankly for a second, and said, "So, why are you here then?"

"Truthfully, I wanted to get away from Ms. Ricotorix. She's crazy. And she needs to be fired. She swore!"

She just sat there and stared at her clipboard.

"And how does that make you feel?" She asked.

I slapped my forehead and left.

Since my head hurt already, it wasn't good. Would I be considered skipping?

(cry)

Suddenly, someone came up from behind me and grabbed my arm. I shouted, and the person covered my mouth. Oh my god! I was going to be kidnapped because I was skipping class!

(cry)

This person had red hair. Like a cherry red. No, maybe an auburn red. Perhaps it was a cherry red. Could it be fire red?

"What shade of red is your hair?" I mumbled through his gloved hand.

He understood me and said, "Fire red. Now, shut up! Let's go."

He shoved me outside and towards a white house. Oh, the pain!

(cry)

But the guy didn't leave. He was still behind me, with his arms crossed, waiting for me to go inside the house.

"Go inside the freaking house." He said.

"But I don't wanna!" (dramatic head turn)

But he stared at me angrily, eyes literally BURNING WITH RAGE, POSSIBLY DUE TO HIS HAIR THAT I NOW KNOW IS FIRE RED.

So I went inside the house. Even though I didn't want to.

(cry)

When I walked inside, everything was white. So white. I stood there and turned around to see my captor pointing upstairs. I walked upstairs, even if I didn't want to.

"So, I go in this room and die or something?" I asked.

"No, you think this is a movie? You must meet our leader. Hehe."

This upsetted me. He was mocking me.

(cry)

So, I went through the door, because the angry guy scared me. And then I saw the most frightening sight in the world. If you would see such a sight, you would probably die of fear. It was….

NAMINÉ AND HER EVIL KITTY OF DEATH AND DESTRUCTION!

(cry)

"Naminé! What the hell?" I was shocked.

"Now, now, Roxas. There will be no trash talk around Fancy Feast, and her bowl of Fancy Feast. I'm sure you're wondering why you are here, correct?" Naminé said so casually, as if we were sitting at a café on a Saturday afternoon, enjoying some coffee.

Of course, I hated coffee, so that would never happen. Why do I hate coffee? I had a bad experience with it. I accidentally got burnt when Sora accidentally spilt his coffee all over me. Accidentally. The pain. The memories.

(cry)