Trappings

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Summary: Saints or Sinners? They never really knew. TenMartha.

Disclaimer: I own none of this. How many times do I have to say it?

Prompt: 004 Insides

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Greed

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I'm used to winners

I need the fame

And if you touched me

You'd be my shame

Xandria, Black & Silver

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Maybe it was greed. He'd never admit it to himself, but Joan's words had cut deep. Why had he run? The great Doctor could have ended it there. Right then. No more bloodshed, heck- they didn't even have to die! So why had he fled them? Hidden himself? Caused so many people so much pain?

Because the great Doctor had decreed that it was wrong. It was a rule made oh so long ago, in a time of naivety. In a time of Time Lords. In a time when he blissfully hopped through Time and Space in a self-centred bubble.

What an idiot he'd been. Greedy little brat, never had time for anyone bar himself.

And now… now he'd thrown away a chance for a real, wonderfully domestic, life. A life that could have all gone so well. But he himself had put paid to that. Shattered one woman's dreams, pushed another away. Each had had the right to have some control, but he had denied it to them. At least he didn't have to face Joan any more, but Martha…

His gratitude for her knew no bounds. During those months when he had been human, she had endured so much. Racism had been hurled from all around. She had worked from before anyone else was up until long after they were asleep, with no thanks given. And what had he done? Stood by and let it all happen. He cringed. He had even allowed people to be beaten for such trivial things. Another strand of shame to tie into his little tapestry that had been building since the fall of Gallifrey.

"Doctor?" Oh no. He didn't want to face her- not now. It was so obvious she loved him, at least, to his Time Lord self it was. And maybe it had been for John Smith too. And after all that had happened, that spark of love still remained. He didn't deserve it. He never had. "Doctor," the voice was more insistent now. He gave a mental sigh and, with the ease of long years of practice, slipped his usual mask back into place as he turned to face her.

"Martha!" He grinned, opening his mouth to continue. She cut him off.

"Don't start that." The grin vanished. "I know what you were thinking," She moved to stand in front of him. He swallowed.

"Yes, well…"

"Doctor, please." She reached up, brushing a strand of hair from his forehead. "Don't give me that." He took her other hand in his own.

"I'm sorry." A moment's silence passed before he drew her into a hug. She returned it.

"I forgive you."

The three words contained a thousand others. I love you being one of the main ones.

Nothing more needed to be said.

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