Twitchy 11

I have to decide quickly! Do I pretend to be asleep or let him know I heard it all? Shoot! I know I don't have long before Ranger comes marching into the bedroom. Asleep. I dropped the remote on the floor, pulled the pillow out from under my legs and snuggled into the comforter, eyes closed. Probably wouldn't fool him for a moment, I considered; but before I could change my mind I sensed a shadow blocking the window's light. My mattress settled slightly as Ranger sat down on the edge. His hand came to rest on my stomach, gently massaging me. I could feel him lean down to me then, and his sweet breath blew into my ear as he whispered, "Mateo, huh?"

I opened my eyes and he smiled his 1000 watt smile at me. "You're busted Babe."

"You're not a dream," I smiled back at him, and sat up, letting his arms settle around me and pull me into his orbit.

"100 real, babe." His voice was a miraculous thing, a song for my heart.

"I was so afraid." My heart was beating a mile a minute. I didn't even know how to begin to tell him all the things I learned about myself, about us and our relationship these past months, alone and waiting for him to return. Afraid he wouldn't return. Afraid he would return and not want anything to do with me, or the baby after having all that time to think.

"Babe." That four letter word was magic to my ears. He could have written a novel and not told me as much. I could hear everything in that word.

"Ranger." I sighed.

"Shhh," he whispered against my hair, soothing me. "Mateo?"

"Do you like it? I haven't settled totally," I lied, looking up at him. Mateo, Baby M, had become a real person; I didn't know if I could change it if he hated the name.

"It's mine?"

"I want it to be. I can't find out for sure till he's born. And he's been a bit anxious to get here, like Joe told you."

"Are you really ok?"

"Yeah. Both of us are healthy. But this is the last child I have, I can tell you that! Bed rest Ranger!!! Having you put me in a safe house is gonna be a cinch in the future!!!"

His laughter reverberated through me. It was a deep, silent laughter that shook his sides. Even his eyes were laughing. God I love him.

"Mateo is perfect, babe. It was my grandfather's name. Abuela Rosa will be thrilled you honored him." He picked up my hand and kissed it, then placed it on his thigh. "When are you due?"

"August 12."

"Babe."

"What?"

"That's my birthday." I could sense a smile, but it was one of those hidden, you have to know it's there kind of smiles.

"It is?"

"Yeah."

We settled back and didn't talk any more. Just feeling his arms, his strength; I was soaking it up like a sponge.

After a time, I twisted in his arms. "Do you like football?"

"Babe?"

"Did you play in high school? Do you watch it on TV?"

"Why?"

"Because I don't even know. I didn't even know your grandfathers name or your birthday! I am having your baby and I don't even know those little things about you!" It came out a bit whinier than it needed to but adrenaline was pulsing through me. Ranger was home; he was safe.

"Babe."

"Raaanger." Damn, can I whine!

"In high school. Sat on the bench most of the time. I watch it on occasion. I don't really have time."

"Giants or Jets?"

"Steelers."

"NO!" I punched him playfully. "Well that settles it. As much as I wanted it to be your son, I am going to have to say no now. It better be Joe's baby. At least he's a Giants fan. The Steelers???" I made an exaggerated 'UGH' face at him and laughed.

I was sensing by the shadow in his eyes that I had gone too far; and he proved it when he began to tickle me on my side as we lay close together on my bed. I was gasping for air and laughing; his face was light and playful and my life was so perfect! Ranger slowly turned the tickling to rubbing and began to nip at my neck and kiss me along the edge of my chin, nuzzling and murmuring to me how much he had missed me.

The atmosphere changed almost immediately. There was a hunger and a yearning in his voice. "Babe," he growled huskily, "This is my son. It will not be Morelli's." He licked my neck as his hands found my belly and he splayed his fingers across it possessively.

Oh god, what if he really is Joe's? I had been plagued by the guilt, the confusion, the uncertainty all through my pregnancy. "Range…."

"Mine." He stated firmly. His fingers found the chain around my neck, and he scooped a finger through his baby bracelet. "Mine, babe," he tugged at the circle. "Mine."

"Joe offered...to well, if you didn't come back….if it was your baby, he said he would stick by me anyway….raise Baby M with me."

"You and Joe have stayed pretty close."

It wasn't an accusation. It wasn't really a statement. But there was a question in his tone, one that told me he was wary and somewhat uncertain. Ranger, uncertain. That would take some getting used to. I had thought about what I would tell him about Joe and I when he came home. I know a good number of people in my life truly believed I would end up with Joe, especially after Ranger's disappearance lengthened. It was hard for my friends and family to understand Ranger's life. That a mission wasn't a choice. That he hadn't left of his own free will. It was something, in truth, that I had a hard time accepting. But I knew it to be true. Ranger loved me. I just wasn't sure if his love was enough.

"Joe is my friend. He and everyone, well they've been lifesavers to me, Ranger. Joe knows ….."

"What babe?"

"He knows how much I love you. He's been very supportive. Actually he is the one who calmed me down finally, after you left. After he and I had a blow out over this," I said, rubbing my stomach, "he's the one who convinced me that you would come back."

"I have had a lot of thinking time in the past 5 months, Babe. Too much head time. I've come to the same conclusion. Just as Ron loves Julie as his own, babe, if this is Joe's child, it won't make a difference. He will be my son too….and you will be my woman."

He sat up then, and reached around his neck, tugging at the chain that was under his t-shirt. It was his dog tags. He looked for the closure on the chain, slid the tags off and pried open my palm. He placed the dog tags in my palm, kissed me on my cheek, and set the chain on the bedside table. Nibbling along the edge of my hair line, his fingers reached for my necklace. He undid the clasp, removed the tags from my palm and slid them onto my necklace.

His arms surrounded me as he laced the necklace around my neck again. He re-closed the latch of the chain, and the dog tags and the baby bracelet settled into the valley between my breasts. His fingers trailed the length of the chain, hooking the bracelet again with his finger. And they continued beyond, as he whispered into my ear, "Someday is today babe."

Epilogue.

I stood at the sink, looking out the window to the back yard. Mateo was determined to get the walking alone thing solved. Today.

His single-mindedness always made me smile. Ranger was squatting on the ground, arms out, encouraging. Joe was sitting cross-legged with Mateo on his lap, a few feet away. Mateo was currently taking a break from the plan, plucking at the grass with his chubby little fingers. I was going to have to take his baby bracelet off soon, I thought, noticing how it fit around his wrist, and my fingers reached unconsciously for the dog tags around my neck. I could put it back where it belonged.

They convinced me this was the way to do it. No coffee tables, sharp edges or hardwood floors. They had been out there for an hour now, the baby toddling and crawling and climbing on them, giggling and having the time of his life. 'Come to daddy,' I heard through the window for the hundredth time. "Go on Mateo, walk to Daddy," Joe said again, and released his hand. Mateo took off, wobbling and attempting to run into Ranger's waiting arms. My eyes lit up with love as I watched my son reach his father without faltering once. Ranger tossed him in the air and laughed. "That's my boy." I heard his giggles and my heart exploded with love.

THANKS to everyone for your enthusiastic response to this story!!! It makes me happy to hear your reactions!!!