Rating of PG-13.
I do not own the characters, JKR does. I simply borrow them.
Sirius and Remus say "I do." The Ministry says "We don't think so."
Ties That Bind.
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Sirius stood in the hallway buzzing with fast lipped gossip. He gritted his teeth as he heard the snide remarks from a group of boys behind him and forced himself to remain impassive. The girl he had been talking to turned to him and whispered in his ear. Sirius had no idea what she had just said, but as soon as he didn't feel her sickly hot breath ghosting over the shell of his ear, he nodded his head as if following her words to a par. She seemed satisfied enough and draped herself onto of him.
He waited for the bell, not wanting to seem too eager to rush off and find Remus. He allowed the blond to stay close to him but would not touch her nor acknowledge her. When the bell rang, sounding louder than usual in the stone walled corridor, Sirius disentangled himself from the crowd and walked around the corner.
As soon as he was sure that he was out of sight from any of his classmates, he ran. Ran fast and took two shortcuts that would insure that he would not run into any groups of students changing one dull class for the next.
His thoughts whirled as fast as his feet carried him. It was hard for Sirius to grasp onto a steady thought. He knew one thing for sure. This entire issue had gotten completely out of hand and that he needed to get Remus to understand him.
By the time he was standing directly outside of his dorm room door, Sirius was still no closer to deciding what to say to Remus than he had been in the crowed hallway. Sirius came up short from opening the door, his breath slightly exaggerated from his run. He pressed himself flat against the door and held his breath the better to hear.
He didn't need to in order to hear the harsh noises that were coming from beyond the door. Dry choking sounds that made him flinch back from the door and bow his head. Sirius twisted the knob gently and found it unlocked.
He was too upset to even think about locking the door.
Sirius felt bittersweet. Remus was terribly upset and it was due to his own actions, and yet he would not have to force himself in and further alarm his husband. Things were going to be hard enough as it was. He did not need a locked door to be added onto the situation.
At the same time that Sirius opened the door, something small and round collided with the wood paneled wall behind his shoulder. It hit the wall hard with the sharp sound of metal on wood, fell to the floor, rolled on its side, and fell silent and still at the edge of the landing.
Sirius gulped as he stooped to pick it up, already knowing what it was.
God, this is what I wanted...But...
Just as his fingers closed around it he found himself bathed in shadow. Breath so much unlike that of the girl's from the hallway bathed on the side of his face. Slowly, he tilted his head up and he picked the ring up.
"I want out," Remus said in a quiet voice in between hurt and anger. His eyes were hard so that they were nearly unrecognizable. The few salty tears gave away his mixture of emotions.
"Remus, I—"
"I don't want to hear what you have to say," Remus got as close as he could without touching Sirius. "I would ask if I could punch you if it weren't such a ridiculous question—"
"Yes."
Remus took a half step backwards, slight shock showing on his face before it disappeared. He raised an eyebrow. Sirius looked back at him honestly and in waiting. His hands were limp at his side.
Remus sighed. "Oh...For Gods sake, Padfoot. I'm not going to hit you."
"I wouldn't reject—"
"I. Want. Out. That's all I want. I don't care about this bond. I want out. Now."
Relief washed over the grim Animagus' features at these words. He moved to brush a stray strand of hair behind Remus' ear.
"Don't touch me," Remus spat, backing all the way into the dorm room.
"Moony, Moony, it's me."
"I know very well who you are, and it's not who I thought you to be."
"If you'll just let me explain—" Sirius rushed in one breath.
"Explain? Explain what? Yes, will you please explain why you hate me?"
"I..." Sirius broke off and simply stared into Remus' cold eyes. He stepped into the dorm room. For every step he took forward, Remus matched him going backwards. Sirius kicked the door shut behind him. "Hate you?"
"Yes. I know you do. What I don't know is why—"
"Moony, Rem," Sirius said, grabbing him by the shoulders.
"Sirius, don't—"
Remus was cut off when Sirius pushed him against the wall. His breath caught somewhere in the middle of his throat.
"I could never hate you, Remus. Just...Will you let me explain?"
Remus looked away from him and clenched his hands silently.
"Look at me."
Remus' head snapped front and Sirius pushed down the urge to be upset with himself, he had more important things on his mind.
"You have ten minutes."
"I...I guess I should have never asked Alastor Moody for help. But I never thought, never even thought, Remus, that it would get this bad."
Sirius' grip loosened and his arms fell to his sides. His eyes turned down cast. He could feel more than see as Remus side stepped around him and perched on the edge of James' four poster.
"It sounds like you have a lot to say. I'm willing to listen to you, but you gotta tell me something first, Sirius."
"What's that?" Sirius asked, looking over his shoulder.
"Was it something I did?"
He sighed and sat down next to Remus on the red quilted bed their thighs touching. "No."
"I'm listening."
"Can I hold your hand, Remus?"
Remus raised an eyebrow. "You don't have to ask, Sirius."
Sirius smiled slightly and took his hand in his own.
-
Early on the next morning, the pair arose quietly. They were tangled in each others limbs and twisted bed sheets. Sirius murmured against Remus' lips and Remus smiled back, granting permission.
"Ready?" Sirius whispered and slipped his hand into Remus' slimmer one.
"As ever."
For the second time in the past months Remus flooed to the Ministry of Magic with a green and white certificate in his pocket. Only this time, Sirius was beside him.
Makes it all that much easier, Remus thought as they stepped out of the other end of the fireplace together. He tightened his grip on Sirius' hand. That same hand removed itself from his grip and replaced itself firmly around his waist.
A strong sense of deja vu rushed over Remus as he stood in front of the heavy wooden desk, behind which sat a man in his early thirties with a crisp green button down shirt with the initials WC in black. He had his dragon hide booted feet propped up on the desk surface and reclined lazily behind a magazine.
Sirius looked over to Remus and silently raised an eyebrow. Remus shrugged and mouthed something that looked a lot like He's always like this.
Sirius cleared his throat loudly. The man behind the desk sighed irritably, dog eared his page, and set the magazine down rather forcefully.
"Yes?" He asked as if he were not being paid to sit behind the desk in the first place, and an air of false sense of politeness. His eyes scrutinized Sirius carefully, he'd already been familiarized with Remus on a number of different occasions.
"We're here to file for a divorce," Sirius slammed the official Ministry paper down with the same amount of force the Werewolf Control officer had.
The man's beady eyes traveled down the paper that he now held in his hands. They jumped over the edge of the paper to wearily eye their linked hands. His eyes narrowed as Remus stiffened and Sirius rubbed reassuring circles into the back of his hand.
"I see," he sneered at Remus and pulled a stack of papers out of the top most drawer. "Keep them handy." He waved the papers vaguely in the air between them and pushed them across the table.
Sirius snorted but made no comment but to take out the Muggle ball point and sign in all of the appropriate places.
"Surprised you lasted as long as you did," the man muttered absentmindedly, flipping page by page through his magazine to return to his marked page. He paused to watch the pen fly rapidly from over the top of the magazine. "Must be kind of nice though, huh?"
Sirius' hand froze, the ink flow ceasing in the middle of a word and forming a small centered puddle on his letter 'i'.
"Nice?" His voice was low and quiet, he could feel Remus take a step closer to him in anticipation.
"Well, there's nothing to fight about, is there? I wouldn't mind one myself," he reclined in his chair with an easy laugh. "I'd like to be able to spit out a 'spread 'em, whore,' with immediate results."
Remus flinched slightly and if possible, Sirius' eyes became even harder.
"You'd have to tell me about it some time," Sirius growled, finishing his signature without breaking his glare and slamming the paper work into straight order. His surname on the last line was overly bold.
When the man picked up the papers to make sure all was in proper order, he noticed this detail and paled. He looked quickly to the name to the boy standing in front of him.
"Well?" The grim Animagus hissed, voice clipped and slipped his hand back into Remus'. The officer was left speechless and settled for gaping at them both.
"Aren't you going to get this over with so we can leave?" Sirius growled. The officer nodded and drew his wand. He held it aloft for several seconds. "Well?"
"Oh, right..." He set the papers down at last and got up from his chair. He hesitated yet again and Sirius finally lost his patience and temper.
"Do you understand English or not?"
Beside him, Remus went rigid and his hand struggled away from Sirius'. Sirius' grip tightened reassuringly.
The man shook his head, started the spell, found his voice gone, cleared his throat, and finally sighed and preformed the spell.
It took a total of three minutes to be complete. Remus Lupin and Sirius Black left the office room much lighter and hand in hand.
-
They lay awake for hours, curled around each other like litter mates and exchanging simple touches in the quiet of the night. Sirius sighed in delight and allowed his eyes to fall close at the feel of Remus' fingers resting on the tips of his lips. Knowing it was there because of an unspoken permission.
Their arms were draped around one another's middles and their foreheads were hardly touching.
"Padfoot?"
"Hm?"
"Love you."
"Love you too, Rem."
There was no need for any vows or a ring. There was no need for a ceremony and the blessings.
This was all either of them needed, would ever need. And they were content in that knowledge.
The silent bonds that held them close completed them. The unspoken ties that bound them for life.
The willing bonds. The ties of love, the ties that bind.
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