Summary: Scully wants to quit...she tells Mulder... they fight and she ends up staying at his apartment for the night. MSR
Note: This is my first fic ever... english is not my first language so excuse me if there are some grammar mistakes. Also sometimes I type horribly... Anyway...
The phone on Mulder's desk rang. Mulder continued shooting those paper balls that bothered Scully so much into the waste bakset just as if he didn't notice that the phone was ringing.
Scully took a deep breath, and took her sight away of the computer "So, you're not going to answer Mulder?" The phone kept ringing
"Nah... If you want to answer the phone that much Scully, why don't you answer it?" He replied, never stopping his little game to piss off Scully.
"I'm trying to get some work done here Mulder." Scully said as she closed angrily her laptop.
"So am I Scully"
"You're throwing paper balls at the trash can! "
"Number one, I am not throwing balls at the trash can, I'm ttrying to get the balls into the trash can. Number two, I could be doing some X-files related work elsewhere but I am not because you came out with one of your great theories, so this is my duty now, to transport this trash into the trash can to.."
"I get it." Scully interrupted. "You're just mad at me because I developed a good scientific theory about the last case that explained not only why we discovered some rare animal features on the bodies we found but also the way they died."
The phone started ringing again. Mulder stopped throwing balls and walked towards Scully and whispered next to her ear so she could listen clearly. "I'm dissapointed because you knew you're theory wasn't true but yet you told them, you knew they we're going to buy it and the case would be closed, still I don't know why my partner, Agent Scully would do something like that just to get us out of a case." Without letting Scully say something else he answered the phone.
"Mr. Clean wants to see us in his office."
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Scully opened the door slowly and poked her head through the door "You wanted to see us Sir?"
"Yes Agent, please come on in." Skinner replied. Both agents sat on their respective chairs. "You've been working very hard. Luckily for you today I don't have any case for you. It's Friday and you're free the rest of the weekend. If something big comes of I'll be calling you, but for now you can go home and enjoy your weekend."
"Thanks Sir." Scully said with relief. Skinner noticed how Scully face changed into a more relaxed one when he told them they had the weekend off. "Can I talk to you for a moment? In private." Mulder gave Scully a weird look she couldn't read, she bit her lip and ignored Mulder's look.
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He waited outside the office for Scully. He looked around and became aware of how cold the hall was, not only the temperature but also he could feel cold energy out there, he shivered. About fifteen minutes passed. 'Why the hell I am waiting for her?' he asked himself, probably Scully was going to come out from Skinner's office ignoring that Mulder bored himself, almost to death, waiting for her because he had noticed she didn't bring her car to work and he wanted to give her a ride home or wherever she was planning to go. For a moment he hesitated about waiting for her if she wasn't even going to notice Mulder's kind gesture, but it wasn't all about being kind or polite, he didn't wanted to be alone, he needed company and not any company, but Scully's. Their relationship was so complicated he couldn't even discribe it to himself, they were always playing this game of pissing off each other that neither of them liked. Interrupting his thought the door next to him opened but he couldn't see Scully, just her small feet by the little space between the floor and the wooden door. Scully shut the door behind her and Mulder stood up infront of her to let Scully know he had been waiting for her.
"I didn't know you were outside. You wanted to talk to Skinner?" Scully said with a low voice, almost a whisper. Her eyes didn't had the sparkle they used to have.
"Yeah, I was going to tell my friend Walter to bring some 'nachos' to our poker night, but I can tell him another time." He said to cheer her a little bit. She looked at him in the eyes and gave him a small grin. Mulder felt uncomfortable so he walked fast to the elevator, leaving Scully standing in the middle of the hallway, and pushed the elevator button. "That's where you're spending your exciting weekend off Scully?" he said to her while the elevator doors opened.
Scully sighed. "No." She walked throught the hallway into the elevator.
All the way down to the basement she didn't say a word. Mulder whistled a strange song he was listening on the radio in the way to work. Normally Scully would have told him to shut up, but this time she didn't.
"Man, that must've been an interesting conversation you had." Mulder said opening the basement door.
"I'm sorry?" Scully said giving him that creepy look she used to give him when he said something wrong.
"Take you're stuff and let's go. I noticed you didn't bring your car sogive you a r I'm going to ide." Mulder informed her as he stood next to the door waiting, again, for Scully to pick up her things.
Scully again didn't said anything in reply to Mulder's comment, She just did exactly what Mulder said.
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"Here we are Scully."
"Thanks Mulder." Scully said without looking at him and opened the door.
Mulder grabbed Scully's arm so she could not get out the car. "Are you ok?.
"I'm fine Mulder." About 99.9 of the times Scully said 'I'm fine' she wasn't.
"Are you sure Scully? If you need anything just call me, I'll be home."
"I'm fine." Scully got out of the car into her building without looking back.
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Mulder entered to his apartment and walked through the living room, kicking off his shoes and dumping his coat to the floor, finally threwing himself to the couch exited to be home, he turned the TV on and watched a documental about the World War II that was already on.
An hour passed by, the documental was over now, he had been asleep, until someone knocking at his door woke him up, rubbing his eyes he slowly stood up from the couch to open the door, picking up his coat from the floor in the way.
Mulder opened the door and saw Scully standing there, she looked smaller than usual.
"Scully? What are you doing here?" Mulder asked as soon as he saw her.
"I'm sorry, were you asleep?" Scully asked politly.
"No." Mulder lied.
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah, What's wrong?"
"I need to talk to you." Her voice was a little shaky when she spoke.
"Sure, come on in." Scully went in and sat on the couch, meanwhile Mulder closed the door wondering what was wrong with Scully why she was acting like a robot, then he sat next to her.. waiting for her to say something but she just stared into nothing lost in her own thoughts, after a few minutes he decided to break the silence.
"What´s wrong Scully?" Mulder finally said.
"I..." She made a pause and looked at Mulder "I wanted to share with you what I said to Skinner this morning... I told him about some feelings I've been experiencing lately... and he offered me to take some time, a break from work."
"What do you mean?... I didn't know, you should've told me ..." Scully again didn't say anything, she seemed a bit dissapointed by Mulder's comment. "I mean, do whatever you need to Scully, I want you to be fine" Mulder said sweetly, holding Scully's hand.
"That´s the problem Mulder. I´m not going to be fine... You know, I always tought that I would live in a big house with a family and that I would travel the world, live a simple and calmed life as a doctor. The passion I felt for my work is just gone. I need to find something more." Mulder let go of Scully´s hand and looked away for a moment trying to understand what Scully was saying, repeting her words in his head.
After a moment he stood up from the couch and started walking around the apartment, fastening his pace more and more. Scully knew what was goin on, he was pissed at her for finally saying what she felt. "Why Scully? Why now? You've been working on this for such a long time and you want to quit this now? When we are so close to the 'truth´?!" Mulder's voice raised with every word he pronounced.
"No we're not!" Scully knew she was yelling at him, but she didn't care."This is unbelievable, you don't even care about what I'm feeling, you just care about your your damn 'truth'!" Scully's angry face changed to a small smile like she had just realized something and she calmed. "...you always did." Scully tried to stand up but Mulder grabbed her by the arms and made her sit again with him.
"I can't believe you Scully, I thought you wanted to find it as much as I do. These concernes you too, don't you want to know who did those things to you? Why you were abducted, who gave you cancer? Why.. "
"All those things happened to me because of you!" she took her hands to her face realizing what she had just said. "I'm sorry Mulder I didn't meant it that way."
"No Scully, you did." Mulder paused for a moment and looked away, reflecting about what Scully had said. An akward silence took possesion of the room. There was no way for Scully to say anything to justify what she has just said, she just waited for Mulder to react. "And you are right, everything that happened to you was my fault."
"No Mulder, I'm so sorry" She placed gently her little hand on Mulder's cheek to make sure he looked at her while she talked. "Whatever I gave up for your quest, and whatever I did for you I did it willingly and with no real regret." Scully said to him calmly.
"It seems to me like your letting go Scully, throwing everything we've been through. Maybe your just rushing things up, why don't you take Skinner's advice and go think about it for a few days"
"It's not a phase. I've felt these several times before but I let it pass, sometimes it comes a moment in one's life where one needs to make some changes and this time I'm not going to avoid it. When I was assigned to the X-files as 'Spooky's partner." she smiled." I stayed because my superiors asked me, eventually I developed some interest in you and in all of these, yes , but you need to understand Mulder."
"And why didn´t you told me before?"
"I thought I could make it work, I thought I could..." Scully stopped talking, she felt tears threatening, she knew she could not cry in front of him so she took a deep breath and composed it.
Mulder looked deep into Scully's eyes.
"Why you always have to pretend to be the strong woman? I'm sick of that, just tell me what's wrong Scully! " Mulder said to her, trying to force the real Dana to come out. "I've told you everything I feel and I let you in, and for once in my life I felt alive, you helped me let go of this pain I've been carring all my life. I can't help you now Scully if you don't let me, it's hard to talk to you behind the mask."
"I don't need help Mulder. I'm fine."
"I think that's why you are here Scully, you came here looking for help."
"Don't start with your phsychology Mulder, I just came here because I thought I needed to tell you these personally." Mulder gazed at Scully and grabbed her hand again, this time she could felt his preocupation for her in his touch. Mulder got closer to her and kissed her on the forehead, Scully couldn't resist, her eyes filled with tears. Mulder looked at her as she became so fragile infront of him, his arms holded her tightly as he pulled her against him softly. Mulder stayed on the couch holding her tightly, he didn't say a word. Lots of things were going trough his mind, after years of being together he had never had Scully tored into pieces like that infront of him, she had never asked for his comfort like she was doing it now.
Finally their eyes met. She looked so fragil that he just wanted to lay her down and kiss her, he knew she would give in to his touch but also he knew he couldn't take advantage of her defenselessstate. 'Ok, what now?' he thought. "Hey, I'm kinda' hungry, wanna order something to eat?"
Scully gave him a are-you-serious look with her wet eyes. Mulder stood up, went into what he called kitchen and return to the living room with a bunch of fast food restaurant's menus he had saved for... well, dinner. "What do you feel like eating? Chinesse, Tai, Pizza..."
"Enjoy you're dinnerMulder, I'm going home, it's late and I'm tired" Scully stood up and approached the door. "I'm sorry, maybe another time."
"Oh! Come on Scully.. It's Friday night!" Mulder said with excitement, something Scully didn't liked coming from him. "And you didn't bring your car."
"I'll take a cab." Scully looked down. "Tomorrow morning I'm going to the office to pick up what's mine and leave."
"Leave?"
"My causin's, she lives in Toronto... her husband just left her so I'm visting for a while." Scully shutted the door and left.