a/n ...JUST. ONE. ONE-SHOT. Jeez...sum1 whack me, please. I keep starting too many new things instead of finishing what I have... -sigh- Oh well. Started this at exactly 1:25 a.m. Please. PLEASE. Comment.
Throbbing.
Pulsing.
Breathing.
Shaking.
Living.
The once scorching pain that had rippled through her body was now causing her to become numb, the female now racking her brain to find the perfect word to describe this moment. This sensation. This feeling.
B.e.a.u.t.i.f.u.l
It wasn't just beautiful, it was that and more. This had become everything. Her everything. This was the ending to what had occurred for so long. Too long. And yet this was only the beginning for . . .
Her mind scrambled as she tried to think of the word, the climactic and meaningful expression that would be the last memory she would recall before she faded. Before she moved on.
Before the pain ended.
Along with her.
This was her story, the story she had spent seventeen damned years working on. The story that never seemed interesting enough to the young 'author'. The story that even though - seemed to mean so little to her - would leave a crashing impact, like a ripple effect, on those all around her.
She smiled.
And that is when she laughed.
It began as a low, quiet buzzing in her throat. Eventually, she felt it rising up her throat, the buzzing growing louder, the sound escaping her lips and echoing out as a cold, humor-less laugh. It ended abruptly as she lay there now. A wave of nausea and a wave of tiredness washing over her.
Her smile grew.
It's almost the end.
The final chapter was in the works. No more fooling around. This is where she stood, and today... Today was the day this story would end. She would let nothing get in her way.
Tired of being pushed over.
Tired of being weak.
Tired of...
Tired...of...
Tired...
Her eyes lids closed slightly, barely enough to be noticed. She tried rolling over slightly, to check the time. To see how long it had been, but found she was unable to move.
She smirked.
Good.
Her whole body felt like one big...
She cursed. Why hadn't she ever thought of expanding her vocabulary further?
Her brow furrowed.
She sighed, relaxing her body once more. Eh. It's not like it would matter anyway. She wouldn't need to speak after this. After her last few moments. She'd be done talking.
Forever.
She heard a barely audible 'tick'...damn clock...she focused harder and listened as each second passed by.
Tick
Tick
Tick
I wonder if they'll miss me?
Unconsciously, her eyes widened slightly. After all the planning, all the scheduling to make sure no suspicion would arise, that no one would walk in on her...She hadn't thought once if anyone would miss her. Why? Why had it occurred now? Why?
She blinked.
The weakness is breaking through again.
She scowled deeply.
No.
Shaking her head she dismissed the voice as a mind trick, a distraction. The 'angel' inside her, the sensible part of her trying to break through by convincing her to change her mind. She smiled now.
That would be the weak thing to do.
She closed her eyes now, the darkness now encircling her vision feeling relaxing...somewhat calming...
She dug the kunai deeper in.
Almost.
Her arms crossed over her chest, each wrist turned while holding a kunai.
The kunai bulging into her skin, into her veins.
I am going to die.
And I don't care.
Why though? Why will I die now?
...Because I want to...
...And because he is back...
The kunai were almost completely embedded under her skin now.
She know's she's going to die.
And she doesn't care.
She could feel the blood soaking the mattress under her as it slid down her almost completely bare skin. The only clothing she wore being a laced bra and panties. The blood, now cascading in a growing pool around her. It was crimson. Dark.
Lovely
She smiled now. The throbbing starting to secede, her vision darkening.
Dear . . . ,
I'm sorry that I'm not sorry for what I have done. I'm sorry that won't regret this. I'm sorry that I will have caused you pain. I'm sorry that you have to deal with another loss, I know that ties have been breaking and battles have been rising. I'm sorry I've now been added to the list of casualties even though this was clearly not in battle. I'm sorry that I took the weak way out. I'm sorry that I could never be as strong as you wanted me to be.
I'm sorry that I could never be as strong as I wanted to be. I'm sorry that I was never able to make you proud. I'm sorry I couldn't help bring Sasuke back. I'm sorry I couldn't smile for you in the days of his absence. I'm sorry I couldn't move on. I'm sorry I always had you worrying over me. I'm sorry I was never who or what I wanted to be. I'm sorry Sasuke came back. I'm sorry he still looked upon me as dirt. I'm sorry I never gave him anything to appreciate me for. I'm sorry I never got over him.
I'm sorry I couldn't help my parents from dying in the last war. I'm sorry I couldn't keep up many jobs and had to sell my house. I'm sorry I had to live in a small apartment for the time being. I'm sorry that I can never do anything except say I'm sorry. I'm sorry I have left. And I'm sorry that I have just lied.
I'm sorry I love you.
- Sakura
"I'm sorry."
He stood facing her, forehead resting on her own now cold as ice forehead.
He smiled lightly.
"I'm sorry I got here too late."
He leaned down and kissed her lips lightly before dropping stepping away from her body.
With the intention now to report to the Hokage and the rest of his teammates...her friends...why their teammate had not shown up, he began walking away from the bed.
After placing the golden engagement ring in one of her enclosed palms.
a/n ...Where the hell that came form, I had no idea. I was jus sittin there today and thought of Sak committing suicide with her arms in a crossed over position & BAM...Please comment, I may rewrite/fix any of this later. I jus need to sleep now. It's 2:20 a.m now and 'today' is 'Black Friday' meaning my mom & I are leaving the house at 6 to go Christmas shopping... -sigh- Thank you.