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Sorry about the huge gap in updating. I'm trying to finish up a lot of my other stories and this one just kind of got lost. Well anyway, please enjoy this!!

Chapter four:

heal my broken heart

Sakura said she'd keep it a secret as long as I did, but when ever I look at her I am filled with disgust. I hate my self for what I did and I am one hundred percent sure I do not like women any more. I'm not sure where I stand with Sai and although part of me likes it when he hurts me, the other part is appalled. I don't know what to say to him without hurting his feelings...if he has any, that and the sex is way to great to give up.

I've taken to hiding my dairy in a hollowed out tree trunk, that way, Sakura can't find it and I don't have to worry about Sai finding it either. I sigh and as I stretch it turns into a yawn. When I open my eyes I see Sai is approaching me. His quick and quiet footsteps threw me off guard and I almost fell over. He smiles and sits down beside me. "Why are you out here all alone?" He is watching me to see if my facial expression will change, when it doesn't he turns and looks to the trees.

"I just needed to think about some stuff." I unfold me knees and lie them out straight in front of me and shift my weight onto the palms of my hands that are stretched out behind me.

"Well I hope what ever you were thinking about is resolved now." Sai does that disturbing smile and sits on top of me. He kisses me and pushes me down. "We've never done it in the dirt before." Sai is quick to remove my pants.

"Stop." He doesn't. "Sai, I can't do this right now." He isn't even listening to me. I'm feeding into his sick and twisted fantasies about me trying to get away. This is where things turn sour. He pulls out a pair of hand cuffs. I feel the cold metal as he clicks the cuffs shut around my hands. I am cuffed to a tree in the middle of no where. Sai has complete control and he's just the type of person that would leave me here if I were to piss him off.

I feel exposed. I hate this and even though I am enjoying the sex part I hate everything else. I see the gooseflesh appear on my stomach and my arms. Sai notices too and he smiles. His tounge licks the tip of my cock and his gloved hand is stroaking it. Now he's asking for it. Suddenly it comes to me...well more than one thing "comes" but I meant that I got an Idea.

"Sai." I pant, "This isn't fair."

"I know." He smiles, but does not look up.

"That's not what I meant. I meant that you should be enjoying this too." This got his attention. He drops his grip and slowly assends up my body. He rests his chin on my sternum and waits for me to say something more. "I mean, you can't be having much fun if I'm the one that always gets tied up."

"You're right, it isn't fair. Maybe you should just try harder to catch me off gaurd." Sai smirks and draws swirls on my lower stomach with his exposed finger.

It dawns on me then, that no matter what, I won't get my way. Although my body is telling me different, my mind is telling me to hate him. But do I? He might be strange, but could I really hate this person? This man who wants to give me pleasure every time we lock eyes, could I really be so heartless as to hate him for that?

I frown, feeling confused. "Whats wrong Naruto?" Sai asks.

"It's just that..." I remember the handcuffs, "It's no big deal, it can wait." Sai smiles.

"That's good." Sai bites my nipple, playfully. When I don't react he bites harder. I try hard to stifle a yelp. I can feel Sai's smirk against my chest when he hears me. The bastard is enjoying this! What a fruit basket...

He lowers himself and once again sucks on the head of my penis. I close my eyes and try to pretend it's someone else. The only person that comes to mind is Sasuke. I smirk, I has almost forgotten how much I missed him. I remember him so clearly, most of all the way he captured me when ever he kissed me.