Difficult Shopper

Icedragongurl/Ice-Fox-Keiko

PG-13 for language

Bleach

Oneshot

Hiyori/Shinji (It's my first time posting for this pairing so please be nice!)

Please Review

I do not own Bleach or its characters, the god known as Tite Kubo did.

Valentines Day, when mortals gave gifts to one another, silly tradition really, but is was not so far beneath his to participate in frivolities. Except, what the hell was he going to get for Hiyori? After all, there probably wasn't anyone else in the entire world THAT difficult to shop for. He had nightmares from the last time he tried to go shopping with her:

"The shirt is pink I don't fucking wear pink!"

"It has a flower on it so it's fucking gay!"

"They call that a skull? I'll show them a skull!"

"What the hell is that? Dog shit? … THAT'S SUPPOSE TO BE A MONKEY!?"

"This store is retarded Shinji, never take me shopping to those retarded stores again!"

Did he get it alright; she'd nearly beat his face in to make sure that he fully understood how much she'd hated that store. As for gifts, well… candy was completely off limits, because she was a terror to deal with when it came to sugar, even her inner hollow wasn't that horrifying. His musing was interrupted by a shout of,

"Has anyone seen my hair ribbons? I can't fucking find them ANYWHERE!!!" Love looked up from his music,

"Are you referring to those things dangling from your pocket?" Hiyori pulled them out. They were white beaten up things that she had had for god only knows how long. That was when an idea blossomed in his head, Shinji grinned from ear to ear. Now he knew what to get her for Valentines day.

Next Day

Hiyori woke up in annoyance, she had no idea where her hair ties went, and this time she was dead certain that she hadn't 'misplaced' them like the last time. After returning from her shower she had discovered them gone. As if they had mysteriously vanished from thin air, she wandered around looking for her hair ties, when she asked where Shinji was, everyone responded similarly that they had absolutely no clue. Where could he have gone?

All the other Vaizards probably knew what was going on, they all had this sly smile on their faces. It was really beginning to piss her off big time! If this was a prank by Shinji then he was going to die a horribly painful death involving her sandal and her sword. It wasn't going to be a pretty sight, but it sure as hell was going to relieve her of her aggravation.

Finally, after an hour and a half of hunting him down, she had sat down and waited for him to show. He couldn't run forever, that was the deadly truth. When he showed his treacherous face, her hands would wring his pale little neck.

Hiyori sat there and fumed, glancing at the clock constantly, it had been eighty-five minutes since she had sat down to wait for him. It had begun to rain only twelve minutes prior, man did it pour in truckloads. Finally she heard footsteps behind her, then the bathroom door opened, the person took out a towel and had begun to dry their wet hair.

"Hey Hiyori. What's up?" she was so going to strangle him to death, maybe evisceration would be better.

"Shin-" she was cut short as she felt her hair being brushed into its pigtails,

"You jackass! So you took them! I'm so going to butcher you when I get the chance!" Finally when he was done she spun around, prepared to throttle him when she froze in the movement. Her old off-white hair ties were in his hand. With a smile he said,

"Happy Valentines Day." Hiyori blinked in confusion.

"Huh?" he handed her a box that would usually hold jewelry, she opened it and stared at the two pairs of different colored ribbons. One was white, the other red,

"What colors are the ones in my hair?" he grinned

"Pink." Her jaw dropped as he lifted his hands to defend himself,

"Black, I was pulling your leg, even I know to protect what little I have left from the last time you nearly decapitated me." She smirked,

"You're a pain in the ass sometimes." He smiled back,

"At least I'm easier to shop for."

Owari!