Chapter 3- Italy
Jason and Elizabeth had been in Italy for two weeks. Two long weeks. Though they spent most of their days and nights together, there was still something standing in between them that kept them at a distance. Elizabeth could feel it. It seemed as though they would never be able to bridge the gap between them. Both Jason and Elizabeth wanted more but neither knew how to broach the subject. So, they continued to dance around one another. It was increasingly becoming a difficult feat. There was, finally, no one else who could stand between them; they had become their own roadblocks to happiness.
Jason watched out of the window as Elizabeth sketched in the garden. The villa that they were renting had an incredible view of ruins that dated back hundreds of years. Puglia, where they were visiting, is located in the heel of Italy's boot. The region is a little known part of the country. It was full of archaeological ruins and moonlike landscapes and was located near the sea. When Jason had thought of bringing Elizabeth to Italy, he knew that she would want to see all of the sights. And they had hit on many of the major tourist attractions and would continue to see more, but when he thought of where he and Elizabeth should stay, he knew that Puglia would be perfect. They would have their privacy and that was exactly what Jason Morgan wanted; Elizabeth Webber all to himself.
Elizabeth sat staring at the sea. The sketch pad was in one hand and she had a piece of charcoal in the other. Her head was tilted to the side as if she were contemplating he wonders of the universe. It was actually nothing that deep. She was only thinking of where she and Jason were going. She knew that tomorrow he had planned to take her sight seeing again but that wasn't the destination of which she was thinking. She wanted to know where their relationship was going. She wanted to know if they had a future. She wanted a future with Jason more than anything else. Since they had been in Italy Jason had been distant. Elizabeth didn't want to think that it was her but what else was she to believe. Elizabeth had tried to convince herself that Jason had taken her away from Port Charles because he wanted to be with her but the last couple of weeks had changed her mind. She now believed that Jason knew that she was in a bad situation with Lucky and he just wanted to rescue her. Damn his loyalty and superhero ego, Elizabeth thought to herself as she put down her sketch pad and stood to stretch her legs. As she turned towards the villa, she noticed that Jason was standing at the window staring down at the ocean. If only, if only he would look at me and see more than Emily's friend or Lucky's girlfriend or the girl who needs to be saved. But he doesn't Elizabeth thought to herself sadly.
I know that when you look at me
There's so much that you
just don't see
But if you would only take the time
I know in
my heart you'll find
Oh, a girl who's scared sometimes
Who
isn't always strong, can't you see the hurt in me?
I feel so all
alone
Jason noticed that Elizabeth had turned and was looking at him. He
raised his hand to wave but before he could, she had turned her back.
Every fiber of his being was telling him to run down to the beach and
sweep her into his arms and love her. But Jason couldn't. He
wouldn't force her; she had to be the one to make that decision. It
had been only a couple of months since she was professing her love
for Lucky. Jason knew a love like theirs didn't just dissolve over
night.
I wanna run to you hoo hoo
I wanna run to
you hoo hoo hoo
Won't you hold me in your arms
And keep me
safe from harm?
I wanna run to you hoo hoo
But if I come to
you hoo hoo hoo hoo
Tell me will you stay or will you run away
Jason was tired. He was tired of Sonny, of Carly, of the business; all the things that made his life not his own. He was tired of running around the world at the drop of a hat, upon Sonny's request. He was tired of watching other people's happiness from afar. What had he done that was so horrible that none of that happiness belonged in his life? By all standards, he was a simple man, but didn't even simple men deserve the love of a good woman and … and a family? The freedom and simplicity that Jake's had once provided to him now felt like a trap that he had fallen into and couldn't get out of. The lonely one room where the people who lived next door had the potential to change daily. Jason Morgan had never been convicted of a crime but that one room was his personal prison.
Each day, each day I play the role
Of someone always in
control
But at night, I come home and turn the key
There's
nobody there, no-one cares for me
Oh, what's the sense
Of
trying hard to find your dreams
without someone to share it with
Tell me what does it mean
Jason sighed and turned away from the window. Elizabeth turned around to glance again at the window. She could no longer see Jason's face only the outline of him as he walked away from the window. She stared for a minute, lost in thought. She thought of what a life with Jason Morgan would be like. Her thoughts brought a smile to her face. She envisioned them taking rides and playing pool at Jake's. She imagined kissing and making love to Jason. She could see into the future, a house with a yard and kids running around while she and Jason loved each other uninhibitedly. Elizabeth shook the thoughts from her head. What would happen if I went to him right now and told him, truthfully, how I felt? Elizabeth thought to herself.
I wanna run to you hoo hoo
I wanna run to you hoo hoo hoo
Won't you hold me in your arms
And keep me safe from harm?
I
wanna run to you hoo hoo
But if I come to you hoo hoo hoo hoo
Tell me will you stay or will you run away
"Elizabeth", Jason called to her as he walked down the trail to where she was set up. She started at his voice and then turned to look in his direction. "I … just wanted to talk to you. I … just wanted to say that…" Jason trailed off and looked past her towards the ocean.
"Yes, Jason? What were you thinking?" Elizabeth asked quietly.
"I was just thinking, well wondering … I don't 'know. Never mind, it doesn't matter. Are you ready to go in for dinner?" Jason asked tersely.
Elizabeth knew that there was more but she didn't want to press. Jason would tell her in time. "Sure, Jason. Just let me get my things together", Elizabeth said as she began to gather her art supplies.
They began walking the trail that led to the house, when suddenly Jason turned around to face Elizabeth. "Do you… do you know what you mean to me, Elizabeth? Really, do you have any idea?" Jason asked in a rush of words.
Elizabeth stopped and stood gaping at Jason. "Whhhaa, huh?"
"Elizabeth I don't know what or if there is anything that you see in me. I don't know what we had back in Port Charles but it … I just felt so much for you. I don't 'have anything to give you, Elizabeth. I'm a mob enforcer who rents a room and the only thing I really own is my motorcycle. I have nothing to offer you. But I do know what I get from you, Elizabeth. You're so beautiful, smart. You make me see things I've never even noticed until you've pointed them out. You have a lot of dreams, and that's good because I -- I hardly have any, so I can believe in yours. That's what you bring to me. I mean, what can I give you? Motorcycle rides and pool lessons. That's about it".
"No, that's not all, Jason. You give me so much more. You listened when no one else could hear me. You trusted me to live my own life when I didn't even trust myself. You make me happy. You make me feel free. Hell, you've given me freedom. What more could I possibly ask for?"
"Security, stability, a whole list of things", Jason said simply.
"But … but what I really want is right here", Elizabeth whispered. "I want you, Jason. I want to be with you. I need to be with you", she pleaded as the tears slowly slid down her cheeks.
Run away no
I need you here
I need you here to wipe away
my tears
To kiss away my fears
If you only knew, how much I
wanna run to you
"I want to be with you, too. I need you in my life like I need my next breath", Jason said as he pulled Elizabeth to him and wrapped his arms around him. "I love you, Elizabeth. I don't know when it began but I do. I… I love you so much".
"I love you too", she whispered into his chest as he continued to
hold her.
I wanna run to you hoo hoo
I wanna run to you hoo hoo hoo
Won't you hold me in your arms
And keep me safe from harm?
I
wanna run to you hoo hoo
But if I come to you hoo hoo hoo hoo
Tell me will you stay or will you run away
Run To You by Whitney Houston. I love this song
Youtube link to the video.