Augh, I suck and making up titles, so if you can think of a better one, PM me, alright?

AN: "[ ]" = Taken directly from the manga

So that means whenever you see dialogue captured within the "[" and "]" symbols, I hold no authority and no ownership over the words, they were taken directly from the English translation of Fruits Basket by Tokyo Pop.

This is basically a drabble on Yuki's feelings about Kyo's "betrayl".

This was originally written in a weird format, but for some reason fanfiction deleates all the weird spacing I had originally put in. In my opinion it enhanced the meaning, and was a really helpful and beautiful style, but....fanfiction thinks otherwise? ^^;;

Yuki's POV

I lay back on my bed, fragile hands folded across my chest. The ceiling fan spun in a rapid clockwise rotation, the cool sound of it's buzzing lightly dusting the room. Cool air seeped through the cracked window beside my bed, carrying with it the muffled inaudible sounds of people amid conversation; the subtle touches of a typical, boring day; a typical boring day that I would spend in his typical, boring room.

But, even so, it was there, in this dry, dull gray room that sheltered me from the outside world, that I closed my eyes and gazed into the deep black behind my eye lids and saw a flash or bright orange against the dark canvas. It was, I perceived, a soft, cool orange, the color of orange Californian poppies and it bloomed in my mind. This picture was so clear, a picture of a soft bright orange that glowed with small, shinning obscure white figures dancing against it. My lips cracked lightly, just barely composing the mumbled words, "[It's so pretty…]" with a short pause I dropped my lips forgetting myself mid sentence to ogle again at the image in my mind for a while longer, "[That pretty orange…]"

I fell into it. How much I admired that beautiful orange color. How bold it was, how it stood out, how it glowed like nothing else, with so much esteem in itself.

Why couldn't I, myself, be like this orange color? Instead I was purple, with false silver. A gloomy, mysterious, purple. But with silver; outer elegance, wisdom, purity… that was all false. If only I were like that orange, that orange I admired so much. The orange that captivated me so much then…but,

but was it at that time that I was attracted to this color because of its symbolism or because of my own childish enthrallment in the attractiveness of its features? Yes, it's true I see this bold orange now as a symbol, but at that time all I could do was be captivated in its light. I'd never seen anything so beautiful as it glowed against the cold flakes of snow. I was a child, simply adoring a pretty object, like children interested in shiny items. In all my innocence all I wanted to do was stroke it,

feel its heat,

brush its glow,

smell its sweetness.

It was so gorgeous and…it captivated me at that time…that orange. I wanted my world to be engulfed in that color, that gorgeous, beautiful color. Not the black Akito would often force upon my mind, even now as a teen.

Oh, to wallow in orange. To forget the black…what a dream.

Yes…like a dream, but….

I can remember them so clearly. Those feelings that rushed through me at that time. I can almost feel the bitter air that chilled my skin, those snowflakes that sparkled so purely. But what I remember most, when I opened the door to peek outside, the boy and that color…it was such a pretty orange,

And…from that orange color, came a voice. A bold, strong, but somehow hurt voice. "[You. You're the rat, aren't you?]"

'Shall I speak to this color? What shall I say? Ah, it's a lovely boy, what a lovely, orange color. I want you to take away my black'.

"Ah…yes."

The glint of hope sparked in my heart and I willed the orange to engulf the black. 'Light up my black…'

Those words, those terrible, bruising words that Akito forced me to listen to every day. Those words he forced me to take everyday, forced me to grasp every day

Those words….those terrible words

That he forced me to

Believe

every. day.

Nobody cares

I am a hated figure, right?

Yes

And

[You're just my toy, you're mother gave you to me.]

{-……no-}

[Everyone hates the stupid rat! Nobody cares! Nobody cares about you!]

That's right

Because

If it weren't true then

They wouldn't have abandoned me

Just like those words he said to me everyday as I cried…..

But…for just this one moment as I admired this orange color, it melted away for just a little bit. When I stepped outside and smiled for the first time since my only friend's memories were erased.

I really thought that….

He could be my friend.

["I just wanted him to be my friend, that was all you know?"]

Yes, and so I accepted that color and willed it to scare away the pitch black I was forced to dwell in….

'please, please, light up my black…'

[ "Someone as rotten as you oughtta do us all a favor and just disappear!" ]

Disappear.

DISAPEAR.

'Do us all a favor and just disappear.'

"If only it were that easy….Kyo."

AN: I don't want to challenge your intelligence by just telling you this, but if you want, heres an explanation that might help you better understand the story:

I am writing a KyoxYuki fiction because I think they fit well together.

In order to enjoy this fiction you must understand the purpose and the meanings.

Yuki and Kyo have both been isolated, betrayed, and hurt from the time they were children to even now. They have many of the same feelings on matters but lack any communication with each other and thus cannot understand how close to each other they stand. Their misfortune, feelings, everything hold a deep resemblance to one another.

Throughout the Fruits Basket series from volume one to volume 17 their relationship completely lacks character development. The most words they'll exchange are "stupid cat" and "damn rat". If their relationship would grow, so would their feelings. Tohru gives Kyo and Yuki the words they need to survive, but she'll never truly understand them. Think about how Yuki and Haru would be if Haru never approached Yuki. They'd be just like Kyo and Yuki now. But after Haru did approach Yuki he gave Haru the words he needed to hear. Yuki could give Kyo those words if he'd just listen and have a much deeper understanding of Kyo than Tohru could. Because of the circumstances they were put in and everything they've gone through Yuki will always have a deeper understanding of Kyo than Tohru ever could, and Kyo will always know Yuki much more than Tohru could. They know each other from the inside-out already and they don't even know.

Yuki had always craved Kyo's friendship; he even said that out loud directly. Yuki has never done A THING to really truly hurt Kyo (other than the physical battles) but Kyo has always held a grudge to Yuki simply because of the old fable. Yuki had approached Kyo admiring his hair and attempting to talk to him, but Kyo thrust Akito words at him. Throughout the whole series, Kyo accuses Yuki of things that he never did, and doesn't feel. Kyo has a false anger toward Yuki which could allll be cleared away if he would just listen.

Also, about Tohru, I hate her. Well, I don't hate Tohru herself; I hate the way she was written. Tohru Honda is an unadulterated Mary Sue. She is not interesting in the least, her words and actions are so controlled and predictable and not "human like". She has no flaws and seriously, makes me almost dislike the Fruits Basket series. Every time she opens her mouth, I cringe.

There's more, but I've gone on for WAY to long. That explanation wasn't clear at all ^^;;, but, its hard to type it all out. O.o