Rose was beginning to wish she'd opted for Ludo instead.

The Ood placed four tiles on the board and sat back, waiting for Rose to take her turn. She eyeballed the tiles and looked up at her opponent.

"You can't use that word," she said. The Ood's globe flashed briefly.

"Why not?" it asked.

"Because it's..." she paused for consideration, and looked up the other Ood, watching patiently over their comrade's shoulder. They blinked at her in turn, like a Mexican wave. "Because it's rude," she said, helplessly.

"This is a human word," said the Ood.

"Well, yes, but-" Rose stuttered.

"We have heard Mr Jefferson use this word many times," it insisted, stolidly.

"I'm sure you have, but-"

"What does it mean?"

"Um," said Rose, blushing slightly, and then blushing even harder at the realisation of the first blush. She reached across the board and rearranged the tiles. "Look, you can make 'count' over here instead," she said, brightly, in a poor attempt to change the subject.

The Ood flickered, and then tactfully returned the letters to their original position.

"This word scores more. It is on a Triple Word space," it said.

Rose gave up, reached for her pen and jotted down the score. It wouldn't be half so embarrassing, she thought, if it hadn't just put the Ood in the lead. She dropped her chin into her palm and looked down at her own rack, which held an N, an A, a K, an E, an S, an R and a W.

"This is gonna be a very long game," she sighed.