THE MONTADOR

APARTMENT 713

Monday, September 10th

3:13 am

By Labor Day morning, Vanessa, Claire, Abby, and Emma Starr were flying back to Westchester. Delia had agreed to let her go back and live with Morgan again, as long as she kept up weekly "visits" with Emma for four months. They shipped Dr. Cairn back to wherever he had come from and gave Emma his room at the Ritz…after cleaning it up, of course.

Abby and Vanessa had returned to their aunt's apartment in the Montador by that afternoon, and Vanessa was unpacking in her room while Abby made a mysterious phone call.

Just as Vanessa closed her dresser drawer, stuffed her suitcase in the closet, and flopped down on her bed, Abby strolled into the room. "Vanessa," she said calmly.

"Yeah?" Vanessa sat up as Abby plopped down on the bed next to her.

The actress looked her sister in the eye. "Do you still want to be an actress?"

Vanessa was puzzled and she chewed on her bottom lip. That was a good question; she hadn't thought about it for a while. Did she still want to be an actress? She was doing well in school and could probably get a more educated job after graduating high school and college…But the glitz and glam of being an actress had never really lost its appeal to her. Vanessa realized that she had never really thought about her life after high school. Did she still want to pursue acting?

Not knowing how to answer her sister's question, Vanessa said, "Maybe…"

Abby grinned mischievously. "Well, I have news for you!"

"What?"

"Okay, I just called my director, right?" Abby looked at Vanessa eagerly.

"Yeah…." Vanessa didn't see where this was going.

"And I explained your whole story to him, starting from when I 'stole' your job when I was thirteen." Abby used air-quotes around "stole."

Vanessa furrowed her brow. "Why? Why does he need to know?"

Abby ignored the question. "And then I asked him if you could take my role in Freedom's Wind! And he agreed!" She air clapped, waiting for Vanessa's reaction.

But Vanessa didn't know how to react. Her dark, cynical side told her that Abby was probably setting her up for something bad. But her optimistic side chimed that Abby had made a turn for the better and was sincerely offering up her role in Freedom's Wind because she wanted Vanessa to have it.

"Why?" Vanessa finally asked Abby. "Why do you want me to take your role?"

Abby furrowed her brow, obviously puzzled by Vanessa's reaction. "Because," she replied. "I thought you would want it. And you deserve it for how far you've come."

Vanessa suddenly felt very dark. Abby was patronizing her again. Even though she didn't seem like she meant to, the actress was looking down on her younger sister and pitying her and giving her Abby's dregs of perfection. "No," Vanessa said stoically. She managed to keep the simmering anger out of her voice. But this time it wasn't hateful anger; it was righteous anger. "I deserve better than your hand-me-downs."

Abby's expression froze in one of shock. After a long moment, she whispered, "What?"

"Don't you realize?" Vanessa felt her voice crack, but her heart was strong and her eyes were dry. "All this time you've been patronizing me; lording your superiority over me. You don't need to do it anymore, not under a guise of being nice." Now she spoke firmly and confidently.

Abby's expression of shock melted into one of realization. "I haven't…" She sounded incredibly unsure. "Is that what you see this as? When I offer you my role in a movie you see it as patronizing?" She could have sounded offended, but she didn't. Abby only sounded insecure and confused.

"Yes." Vanessa nodded. "I don't want to make you angry at me. I don't want to go back to what was before." She paused and searched her sister's eyes. "But I don't want you to give everything to me and not let me do anything for myself, either."

Chewing on her bottom lip, Abby seemed to mull this over. "I think I understand," she finally said.

HEART ATTACK PINK

FREEDOM'S WIND WRAP PARTY

Friday, September 21st

10:52 pm

As the Freedom's Wind wrap party drew to a close almost two weeks later, Vanessa felt nothing but blissfully happy.

By Labor Day morning, Vanessa, Claire, Abby, and Emma Starr were flying back to Westchester. Delia had agreed to let her go back and live with Morgan again, as long as she kept up weekly "visits" with Emma for four months. They shipped Dr. Cairn back to wherever he had come from and gave Emma his room at the Ritz…after cleaning it up, of course.

Vanessa had eased back into school as smoothly as she eased under her satin comforter every night. Massie and the Pretty Committee, who had enthusiastically welcomed her back, had offered to fabricate a story as to why she had been gone for a week, but Vanessa had declined. She had told the truth to anyone who asked, and she had felt strangely good doing it.

Abby had invited the entire Pretty Committee (including Vanessa, who was now an official member) to the wrap party for her movie, so, of course, for the last week, they had fretted over outfits and dates. Massie invited Chris, Claire was bringing Cam, and Alicia and Emilio were going together. Dylan had worked up the nerve to invite Kemp, who had excitedly agreed, and Massie had "invited" Derrington, knowing he would take Kristen as his date.

Vanessa herself had nervously asked Julian LaCursia if he wanted to go with her. Julian had inquired about why she had been gone for a week, but had seemed put-off when she told him about her suicide attempt and stint in the mental institute. When he agreed to go to the wrap party with her, though, Julian had confessed that he had decided he didn't care if she was suicidal or mentally insane.

The wrap party had been an amazing night, but after hours of dancing to the DJ's wild music, Vanessa was more than tired. She was sitting in a chair by the wall of the hip bar, Heart Attack Pink, waiting for Julian to come back with her virgin colada. But when her hot blond date appeared before her empty handed, she asked, "What's going on?"

"Didn't you hear?" Julian asked back. "JoJo's going to be singing live in three minutes. They're going to be the last two songs of the evening; we gotta dance!"

Vanessa's face broke into a smile as she saw the singer stepping up to the microphone on the stage. Julian extended a hand and Vanessa let him pull her up. They joined the many other couples heading for the dance floor.

Guitar notes grumbled through the speakers as JoJo and her band started up the energetic Freedom's Wind theme song, "If I Were Free." For a full four minutes and three seconds, she and Julian moved to the beat, gyrating with the rest of the dancers.

Then slow drumbeats and a synthesized orchestra signaled the beginning of a new song. Vanessa recognized this one immediately, as JoJo began to sing,

You're beautiful, but you don't know

Can't see what's there inside your soul

She had heard this song all those days ago, that first day when she had lifted the knife to her wrist and thought better.

Always feeling like you're not good enough

You wish you could be someone else

Sometimes you just can't see yourself

But I can see just who you are, who you are…

Julian put his arms around her waist, slowly rocking her to the beat of the music. She smiled up at him; the floor was clearing and a few couples remained, but she felt like they were the only two people in the world.

You're exceptional the way you are

Don't need to change for nobody

You're incredible, anyone can see that

When will you believe that you are

Nothing but exceptional?

Vanessa rested her head on Julian's shoulder. The scent of his cologne tickled her nostrils, and she smiled. She hugged him around the waist as they swayed.

You never think you measure up

Never smart or cool or pretty enough

Always feeling different from all the rest, ooh

You feel so out of place, you think you don't fit in

I think you're perfect in the skin you're in

You're just perfect just how you are, just how you are…

As JoJo's thick voice crooned out the chorus again, Vanessa knew that every word was true. This song, "Exceptional," could have been her anthem.

If you could see the one I see when I see you

You'd know how lucky you are to be you

I see through into you, ooh…

And you are…

The music slowed down, and Vanessa felt Julian's fingers under her chin. He tilted her head up and gently pressed his lips to hers.

You're exceptional the way you are

Don't need to change for nobody

You're incredible, anyone can see that

When will you believe that…

JoJo paused for a moment, and the music stopped. Then she cued her band again and let her voice loose.

You a-a-are…!

You're exceptional the way you are

Don't need to change for no-obody-y-y

You're incredible, anyone can see tha-a-a-a-a-at

When will you believe that

You a-are

Nothing but exceptional…?

I believe it now, Vanessa thought. As the song faded out and the dancers trickled off of the floor, Abby joined JoJo on the stage. The director of the movie held the microphone and said, "Let's get another round of applause for our stars, Joanna Levesque and Abby Boyd!"

Abby, JoJo, and the director put their arms around each other as photographers' cameras flashed and the partygoers clapped. Vanessa saw Abby's eyes catch hers, and she smiled back at her sister.

Vanessa glanced around the bar and saw the Pretty Committee and their dates getting ready to leave. When Claire saw her looking their way, she waved at Vanessa.

Vanessa turned back to Julian. "Let's go," she said, and he nodded and followed as she headed towards her friends. Vanessa took a deep breath and smiled. The shooting of Abby's movie, Freedom's Wind, might be over, but Vanessa knew that her freedom was only just beginning.