Disclaimer:- i don't own anything from One Tree Hill the characters or nothing. Any similarity between the people i write about and real people is just coincidence.
Summary. What if peyton had realised she still loved Luke before the school shooting. What if instead of telling Brooke she'd left town. What would happen then? I've wrote 2 versions of this (two different endings) and my mate suggested I go with this one. Hope you all enjoy. All reviews definately welcome
"Haley, Every song has it's CODA, a final movement. Whether it fades out or crashes away, every song ends. Is that any reason not to enjoy the music? The truth is there's nothing to be afraid of. It's just life.
My birth mom once told me that little speech in an effort to get me to open up my heart again and start letting people in especially Lucas I think going on what else she said to me. Not too long after that she died and things got really painful for a while. Although I tried to follow her advice and let people in I found I just couldn't do it. I mean people always leave right? Dad leaves all the time, Jake My mom's all of the important people in my life all seem to leave at some point so why should I let people in. They're only going to leave and break my heart again. The only people I guess I really managed to let in were Brooke and of course Luke. I mean have you ever tried to keeping Brooke Davis out of something she really wants in on? Then you know how hard that really is. I'd probably have had more luck trying to stop an avalanche with a hair dryer.
Then we come to Luke. I guess I didn't actually so much as let him in as admit to myself he's always been in my heart on some level. You see although I've only actually known him properly for what…. a little over a year now (as you well know) I feel like on some level I've known him so much longer. He and I only really started talking when he joined the Ravens and it seemed like straight away he could see into me. I don't mean like into my panties like most boys seem to when they see a cheerleader I mean into ME, my soul. He accepted me instantly for the broody, moody, complicated slightly flawed person I am without judging me for any of it. At first I guess I hated him for it almost as much as I loved him for it as well. Being around Lucas makes my senses flare, my skin tingle and my pulse race. Even though now he's with Brooke and you know how I nearly lost her before because of how I feel about Lucas I can't stay away from him. He grounds me when I'm lost, makes me feel safe when I'm scared or alone, loved when I feel loathed. He saves me not just from physical harm, although he's done that a time or two, but from myself.
That's why I left town a few nights back. I guess you've probably been wondering why I haven't called by or answered my phone the last few days well now you know. I had to get away from Him before I did what my heart is still telling me I should do; Before I told Brooke that I love Lucas, that I'm in love with him and always have been; Before I ruined my friendship with Brooke again, probably for good this time.
Right now I'm in a hotel down in Carolina beach just outside of Wilmington as you can probably guess by the stationary. I don't plan on staying here for long, a week or two at the most but I don't plan on returning to Tree Hill again either. People always leave right? Well this time it was me that left before everything could go wrong again. I'll write again soon Hales but I need you to do two things for me. Firstly my dad should be home at the end of the week so could you tell him I've gone away for a while and I'll contact him when I'm settled. Secondly don't tell Brooke or Luke where I am or even that you've heard from me. I can't …well won't let him chase me down and convince me to come home but you and I both know if he found out where I was he would do just that. He'd think he was saving me and you know that's what he does. I mean he chased you down to save both you and Nate and your marriage. I can't have him doing that for me and breaking Brooke's heart. Please promise me you won't tell him anything.
I've gotta run now Hales. I'll write again soon either before I leave here or when I'm settled again. Tell Nate I love him.
Love always your friend (at least I hope you feel that way)
P.S.
The slim brunette's hands shook as she lowered the letter that had arrived only that morning. At first she'd felt like tossing it in the trash as it had been stamped WILMINGTON and she knew she didn't know anyone from down there but she'd then recognised the writing and had torn it open. A slow tear trickled down her cheek as the realization of how hurt one of her few good friends was at that point in time and of how much worse her best friend was going to feel when he realised Peyton had left.
A knock at her door made her look up. Dashing the tears from her eyes I case it was Luke or Brooke she opened the door. The sight of the tall muscular brunette standing on the step made the tears return as quickly as she dashed them away. She took two quick steps and wrapped her arms around his waist, burying her face into his chest as the tears overwhelmed her.
Nathan swayed with the impact of Haley crashing into him as his arm came up around her shoulder comfortingly. He didn't know what had upset her so badly but he knew now was the time for silence and love not words. After a few minutes (and a very soggy t-shirt) Haley pulled back a little and Nathan braved the question "What's wrong?" expecting the usual upset-Haley-long-rambling answer. Instead she simply turned, picked up some papers of the coffee table and handed them to him saying "You'd better read this, and sitting down's probably a good plan too".
As Nathan read over the words his ex-girlfriend and now little sister) by heart not blood) had wrote he felt his own heart sink. Finishing the letter he looked up at Haley on the verge of tears himself and whispered "what do we do? I mean we're going after her right? Or at least we have to tell Luke. He needs to know Hales, despite what she said he needs to know!"
Haley shook her head in wonder at the man in front of her. How well Nathan knew what she was thinking was scary sometimes and right now it was downright freaky. He'd just said everything she was feeling. Opening her mouth to reply she said "….
"Needs to know what Nate?" Came the voice from the doorway as Luke entered the apartment "despite what who said what do I need to know?" Before Haley could do or say anything Luke grabbed the letter out of Nate's hands and began to scan it guessing that the answers he wanted were there. His face paled as he reached the last page. "She's not coming back? But, why?" Luke's blue eyes met his brother's as the full import of the letter struck home. Peyton was in love with him, she'd left town because of him, she'd abandoned her life….because of him. What was he going to do now? Who would he hang out with when he just wanted to listen to music and read in comfortable silence? What w… "LUKE!"
The sound of his name being shouted in his ear startled him out of his spiralling thoughts and he looked down at his friend of so many years, looked down at eyes that like his, were glistening with unshed tears.
"Luke what do you want to do?" asked Haley, choking the words out around the lump in her throat. "Are you going to go after her? I know she said not to but…" Her words trailed off as she recognised the look in her best friend's eyes. It was a look that said try and stop me, that told her what Luke had denied so many times, that screamed I love Peyton not Brooke, Peyton! She knew then what he was going to do and though she felt desperately sorry for Brooke she knew it was the right thing to do.
Nathan stood up as Haley tore her eyes away from Luke and looked over at him. For all that people said they were too young to truly know love and commitment he usually knew what Haley was thinking and this time was easier as he felt the same way. He held out his car keys and the envelope the letter had arrived in, the envelope with the hotel Peyton was staying at's address. "Go get her man," He smiled "bring her home before we lose her for good, probably along with you".
The tall blonde shook his head. It'd taken all of two sentences and his brother had remarkably managed to cut to the heart of the matter. His little brother who had always seemed so naïve about love had understood what he himself hadn't; If he didn't go and try to bring Peyton home then he would be losing part of himself along with her. He held up his hand and replied with a tired smile "Thanks Nate but I'll take Keith's car instead. I don't want to break down on the way do I?"
As Luke took the envelope and turned to leave, heading first for home to get the car and then east to find Peyton, Haley clutched at his arm "Luke be careful. She's hurting badly and unless you approach her right she's going to run again and this time she may not write. You know what she's like about betrayal or being lied to and she did ask me not tell you anything"
"I will Hales. I know her better than most do and I'm not gonna lose her through idiocy" He smiled down at Haley "I can't lose her not now. I'll call you when I get there." With that last statement Luke walked out of the apartment, leaving Haley and Nate looking at each other wondering if they had done the right thing letting him have the letter.
"Mom!" Luke shouted as he pushed open the back door to his house "You home?" Unsurprisingly there was no answer as it was almost noon which meant that the lunch rush down at the café was probably just starting. As he walked into his room Luke didn't know what to do first. Grab some clothes and his I-pod or write a note telling his mom where he was going. He decided to forgo the note and just swing past the café on his way out of town. At least if the place was busy his mom couldn't shout at him too much...well too much anyway.
5 minutes later he yanked his bedroom door open and froze as he nearly walked into the small figure of Brooke Davis…his girlfriend. "Hey Boyfriend" she laughed "Where's the fire? Oh no don't tell me they're giving away free basketballs at the mall." Luke froze for a second knowing that what he was about to say would wipe that smile away but he knew he had to say what was in his heart. He couldn't keep lying anymore not to anyone no matter the consequences.
"Brooke. I'm going away for a little while. It's Peyton. She's left town running and I need to bring her back. I love her Brooke. I think I always have. I'm sorry. I'll see you" God how he hated to be right he thought as he saw the beautiful eyes in front of him cloud over with pain. But he had to follow his heart and right now his heart was pulling him towards a skinny blonde in Carolina beach. With little further thought he brushed past Brooke and walked quickly to Keith's car, already focusing his thoughts on how to convince that damn moody blonde to come back with him. He glanced over his shoulder once as he reached the car but Brooke had gone. Although he regretted what he had just done to her he knew it had been for the best at least he hoped it had been.
After swinging past the café and, surprisingly, meeting little resistance from his mom he headed out to the freeway for the long drive towards Carolina beach. His head churned constantly with thoughts as he settled down for the trip. Did he really love her or was he just scared of losing a close friend. Was he making a mistake chasing her down and maybe getting hurt again or should he just have stayed safe with Brooke? He even found himself wondering if he should have brought Brooke along with him, not told her he loved Peyton and brought her along to help convince Peyton to return but he knew that was a stupid idea even as it flashed into his mind.
The brake lights of the car in front suddenly lighting up brought him out of his reverie quickly, just not quickly enough to stop or avoid a collision. This was going to hurt…
Hey girl you've got a …The sound of Dashboard confessional playing brought Peyton out of her trance. Looking up from the picture she'd been slowly sketching, a picture of a young blonde man with bottomless blue eyes, she reached her hand and tilted her cell-phone to see the caller ID. It was Haley.
"Haley?" She thought "Why would Haley be calling me when I asked her not to?" Deciding to find out she flipped open her phone and drawled "what's up girlie?"
"Hey Peyton" Came the deep voice of her ex-boyfriend and now close-almost brotherly-friend and Haley's husband Nathan "You need to come home now. It's important. Luke has…" For some reason she didn't yet know but was afraid to ask about Nate's voice cracked at that point. It was then she recognised the sounds in the background…crying….was that Haley crying! What the hell was going on in her former home town? What had ha…wait did he just say something about Luke?
"Lucas has what Nate?" she almost whispered, tears building up in her startlingly hazel eyes "Don't tell me he's…dea..."
"No" Nate almost shouted down the phone, kicking himself for completely scaring her (literally and mentally) "No he's not dead Peyt but he is in a bad way. Worse than that car accident last year. You need to get back here. He needs you and so do the rest of us."
"Nate I can't come back. If you know I've left then you probably know why and that's all why I can't come back. I can't face Brooke again, knowing I love her boyfriend and I can't face seeing Luke again either. It's just too hard Nate I can't do it!" Peyton wept into the phone guessing that Nate was probably about to scream down the phone at her and tell her she was some kind of terrible per…
"Peyton" Came Nate's voice down the phone overriding her own thoughts "Listen to me. I know why you think you can't come back but there are two things you don't know. Firstly Brooke and Luke are no longer together, they're over. He ended it with her earlier this afternoon; And more importantly He knows Peyton, Luke knows. He read your letter. That's why he's hurt right now. He was on his way to see you, to bring you back or to go with you wherever you end up going. He drove his car into the back end of a pickup on the freeway because he was chasing you. You owe it to him to return Peyton!" Nate voice had gotten steadily louder over that brief tirade and he was now almost shouting. All the worry, pain and fear he was feeling came pouring out of him. For all that at times he'd hated his big brother he knew that he loved him and he needed him home safe and well. "You have to come back Sawyer he needs you to save him now."
"I didn't know Nate. I'll come back…for Luke. I don't…can't promise I'll stay but I'll come back until he's awake at least. Call you when I get into town." Peyton almost whimpered down the phone, completely cowed by the change in Nate's voice, "I'll be on the road in a half hour tops".
Closing up her phone Peyton shivered as she thought over the conversation she had just had with her second best male friend (after Lucas anyways). Luke knew about the letter she'd sent Haley, knew about her leaving town but worst of all he knew why she'd left. Even worse than that Brooke probably knew everything as well. Everything she'd tried to prevent happening by leaving had happened anyway. Brooke would hate her now (Again), Lucas was hurt and in the hospital (Again) and now for the first time in a while Nate was angry at her also. As her thoughts began their familiar spiral into blame and recrimination at herself for causing her friends pain (AGAIN) she managed to shake herself out of it. Right now none of that mattered she firmly told herself, right now the only thing that did matter was that Luke needed her and she knew she had to go. He had saved her so many times in the past maybe now was the chance for her to save him.
Grabbing her bag she threw her clothes into it, followed by her sketch book pencils and the few CD's she'd brought along with her. As she stood in the doorway ready to leave she scanned the room checking for anything important she may have forgotten. Seeing nothing she turned and ran out practically throwing the keys at a surprised looking desk clerk on her way past. Throwing her stuff into the back seat of her old Comet she hopped in and nervously began the long drive back to Tree Hill. One thought constantly ran through her mind as she settled down for the trip "Please god let him live, Please God don't take another person I love away from me forever, not again!"
Haley paced the waiting room of Tree Hill's hospital surgical department in a frenzy as her husband leant on the doorframe watching her. After his earlier call to Peyton he'd called Brooke to let her know what was happening but she'd cut him off before he'd said much more than "Luke's in the hospital…its bad". She'd briefly stated flatly that she would collect Karen on her way there and hung up. All he could do now was wait; For Karen and Brooke to arrive; For the doctor to come out of surgery and tell him what was going on; For Peyton to drive the 100 or so miles from Wilmington; For his brother to wake up and be ok.
The sound of running feet from the corridor made his head lift and brought his attention from Haley's frenetic pacing. Wonder-of-wonders it even managed to distract Haley from that same pacing before she wore a hole in the solid stone flooring. The couple both looked at each other and then over at the door as Brooke followed closely by Karen and Keith burst in. The three women flew into each others arms sobbing with god-only knew what mix of emotions as Keith strode over to Nathan worry etched deep into his face.
"Any news yet Nate" Drawled Keith raising one hand to Nate's shoulder briefly before dropping it again "How's he doing? How're you doing also?"
Nate shook his head mutely "All I know is he put his car, your car actually, into the back of a pick-up. The hospital called me as they'd tried Karen but she was engaged and Luke had me, well Haley, down as his second emergency contact person on his notes" Nate's shoulders began to shake as the worry and fear finally broke through his walls and he laid his head on Keith's broad shoulders and wept. Once the crying was finally over from everyone in the group the 3 teens and 2 adults sat and talked quietly about Luke. Every sound from the corridor made their heads lift briefly and every time someone went by their hearts would jump and then drop into their boots when they realised the person was going by not coming in with news of Luke. As time went by the 5 worried friends gradually quietened down as the worry over Luke's condition began override the need to get reassurance from each other.
"Lucas Scott? Is there anyone here for Lucas Scott?" Every one of their heads came up together as the doctor entered the waiting room. "I'm his mom" Karen said stepping forwards as the rest of the group huddled in behind her, hoping for good news "How bad is it Doctor? Is my son gonna be ok?"
"I should really speak to you in private Mrs Scott" The surgeon began but before he could say anything else Karen interrupted him "It's Mrs Roe actually and this is the rest of Luke's family, his brother, sister-in-law, girlfriend and uncle. Anything you want to say to me you can say to them so please, is Lucas going to be ok"
The doctor looked at the small group on front of him for a few seconds before he nodded and said "Ok. Lucas is doing well, he should be fine barring complications. We had to reattach his shoulder again and he's got a few broken ribs on his right side. He's also going to have one hell of a headache for a few days along with a slight concussion but that should clear up without too much trouble. He's only now waking up so you can go through to the ICU 1 or 2 at a time only. Now I have to ask, which one of you is Peyton?"
The group, which had broken into smiles of relief as the doctor spoke, looked at each other and back at the doctor, stunned that he'd ask for Peyton especially by name. Before anyone could say anything though a small voice whispered from the doorway startling them all "I am"
"Good, because Lucas has asked to see you first if you don't mind and alone if you all don't mind. Do you want to come with me now?" The doctor smiled, turning towards Peyton and gesturing for her to precede him out of the door. Peyton hesitated, looking at the small crowd of people in the waiting area worriedly but surprisingly Brooke spoke up first "Go on Peyton. It's you he needs to see right now. We'll wait for a while." Brooke smiled reassuringly at Peyton as she looked around the group to see them all nodding in agreement with her "Go on its ok…we're ok." Peyton nodded gratefully at Brooke and the others as they all added their own words of encouragement and turned to follow the doctor down the corridor towards Luke's room.
As she walked away out of their sight Karen turned to Brooke and opened her mouth to ask what was going on. Before she could speak though Brooke smiled wanly and said "We broke up Karen. He…we finally realised that as friends he and I work, as a couple we don't. Plus he loves her, I think he always has (Haley nodded absently at that statement) and so do I. I'm tired of pretending me and Luke work when I know deep down he wishes I was Peyton and I'm tired of watching her pine over him and refuse to admit it for fear of hurting me."
Karen stood stunned at Brooke's speech and her surprise only grew as first Haley then Nathan and finally Keith all agreed with the pretty brunette's heartfelt words. After a few seconds to let it all sink in Karen held out her arms to Brooke and, enfolding her in them, whispered "I thought it was only me who'd noticed. I'm sorry Brooke but, if it helps, our relationship, you and I, won't change. I love Peyton for making Luke happy but I love you for who you are and for allowing them their chance. I see you as one of my own and that isn't going to change whether you're dating my boy or not." The rest of the group looked on as Brooke burst into tears and buried her head into Karen's shoulder, wondering what Karen had said to Brooke.
BEEP-BEEP-BEEP was the noise that greeted Peyton as Doctor Bedford (He'd finally introduced himself on the way to the ICU) ushered into Luke's room with a final injunction to not over stress Luke if possible. Her heart skipped a beat as she saw him lying there, pale as a ghost and hooked up to so many drips and other machinery. He looked like he was asleep so she started to turn away to return to the others figuring he needed his rest especially at the moment.
"Running away again Peyton?" The softly spoken words stopped her in her tracks. Looking over her shoulder in astonishment she flushed as he smiled at her in that lazy way it seemed only he could.
"Nope" She joked as she walked back over to sit beside him "Just didn't want to be deafened by your snoring!" She smiled as he began to laugh at her sally but winced as his face paled. She'd forgotten about his broken ribs and the primary rule NEVER make someone with hurt or broken ribs laugh…unless you don't like them that is. "Luke I'm so sorry" she started to babble out an apology as she felt the tears begin to roll down her cheeks.
Luke grabbed her hand and squeezed it gently, "Peyton stop!" He murmured "You didn't make me crash Keith's car, you didn't break my ribs in fact all you did was make me laugh and that ain't a bad thing. It's not your fault I got hurt so don't cry". She smiled forlornly "Liar!" She replied "It is my fault, I know I hurt you. You wouldn't have even been on that road let alone so distracted if I hadn't run off. It's my fault so at least let me take the blame for this"
Again Luke squeezed her fingers together to attract her attention "Peyton! Give it up. I crashed because I wasn't paying attention to the road. No other reason. Now I didn't ask for you for tears and recriminations. I asked Doctor Bedford to call you in first because I need to tell you something. I need you to know how I feel about you."
Peyton opened her mouth to interrupt but Luke simply laid his finger across her beautiful lips and carried on talking "I don't care how you feel about me Peyt (Liar his brain screamed at him)" He smiled wanly "But I do care that you know how I feel about you. I love you Peyton Sawyer. You're the other half of my soul, in many ways the better half. I know I've been with Brooke recently and, after how close we got over last summer, I know that hurt you. It's just every time I tried over the summer to tell you how I felt you pulled away and started talking about how much you love Jake so I hid out with Brooke. You told me in so many ways directly and indirectly that you'd chosen Jake so I stepped back and gave you the space you needed. Then Brooke returned and I guess I settled for her instead. I read the letter you sent Haley so I have some idea of how you feel but I needed you to know my side of things. I love you Peyton that's the long and short of it. I don't want you to respond straight away, I don't want you to feel obligated to tell me how you feel or even to feel anything. I just wanted you to know how I feel and I want you to think on things before we talk again. Now I have one more thing I need you to do. Can you send in my mom and Haley. I know they're going to have a lot of things stored up to shout at me about and I want to get them in here before they think of any more things. Thanks Peyt."
Peyton nodded, dumbstruck at the speech she'd just heard. Luke loved her, he really loved her and he didn't want her to say anything or give anything she wasn't prepared to. She stood up and turned to leave the room "Luke…what I said in that letter…I meant it…I love you." she murmured as she closed the door and walked slowly back to the waiting room to pass on his message, well the part of it intended for other people anyway, and to face Brooke.
Karen sat in the waiting room, every muscle in her body wanting to send her running down the corridor to her son's room yet cell in her brain telling her to stay behind. She loved Luke and needed to see he was ok but she knew her broody son loved the quiet blonde girl that she'd come to see as another adopted daughter over the last year or so. A little over a year before Karen had had one son and a sort-of adopted daughter in the form of Haley. Now thanks to Luke being Luke she had somehow gained another two adopted daughters and one sort-of adopted son.
As Karen mused on the way her life had changed since Luke joined the basketball team and the three teens in the room waited impatiently for news of Luke Peyton slipped unnoticed into the room. Crouching down in front of Karen she reached out and touched her knee "Karen he's asking for you now. Haley he wants to talk to you as well. Says he reckons you've both got things to say to him so you might as well both say them together and get it out of the way quicker."
The touch on Karen's knee and the sound of Peyton's quiet words brought the group out of their collective thoughts and back to the real world. Karen and Haley sprang up first, both nearly sprinting for the corridor to Luke's room, while Nathan and Brooke moved for Peyton. Keith however just sighed thankfully and moved over to the vending machine to get some water.
"Well?" Brooke snapped, clutching onto Peyton's arm, "How is he? What did he say?" Holding up her hand before Brooke could launch full speed into one of her trademark babbling-no-breath-taking rants Peyton answered "He's gonna be fine, I think. He looks like crap but he should be back to his annoying self in no time". She looked at Brooke's relieved face, not knowing how to say what else Lucas had said but knowing if she wanted any chance at continuing to have a friendship with Brooke she had to.
"Peyton" Brooke smiled sadly "Don't. Haley showed me your letter. I guess I've always known how he felt about you at. It was how angry at you being in danger he was at that party up at the college last year that really brought it home to me though. Even though he came back to me this year I've been waiting for him to wake up and realise it's you he really wants. That's why I've been fighting so hard for him I guess. Can't exactly say I'm happy that you love my, well now ex, boyfriend but I'm kinda stunned that instead of saying anything you just left. I get why you did it but instead of breaking my heart and ruining our friendship by starting something with him you left town without a word and broke my heart anyways." Brooke paused, catching sight of Nate's face and the growing look of amusement on it, and rambled on quickly "I guess what I'm trying to say is I know and understand why you left, I get that the two of you are in love, I even get why you didn't say anything about it to me and I forgive you for all of it. Although…If you keep laughing at my Nathan Royal Scott I swear I'll have you singing soprano quicker than you can dunk a ball through one of those damn hoops!" she snapped fixing Nate with a sharp glare and planting her hands firmly on her hips.
Peyton stood there, looking from Nate's amused and now slightly worried face, to Brooke's angry one, wondering whether to laugh at the growing fear in Nate's eyes or burst into tears at Brooke's words. The fear spreading across Nate's face as he stammered an apology to Brooke, no noticing the glint of mischief in her eyes, finally helped the laughter win out and she started giggling. The laughter only got worse as Brooke and Nate turned towards her. Soon enough the other two teens were laughing along with her as the humour in the situation sank in and the stress of worrying about Luke and how he was doing drained away.
Keith looked over at the three teenagers laughing away and shook his head ruefully before turning back to the corridor leading to Luke's room. To many other people the laughter might have seemed like a strange reaction but Keith understood why they laughed so hard. It was an escape from the stress like drinking or running could be. His attention was diverted from his thoughts by the sight of Karen and Haley returning from Lucas' room arm-in-arm smiling happily. If they were smiling like that then everything was probably going to be ok.
Peyton woke to be greeted by sunlight streaming into her eyes blinding her. For a moment she was confused as her bed faced west but then she recognised the room she was in. Last night, after Nate and Brooke had popped into Luke's room briefly to reassure themselves he was ok, the whole group had returned to Karen's house none of them wanting to be alone. They'd planned to have dinner and maybe watch a movie together but had all crashed soon after arriving as the worry and stress of the day had caught up with them. She herself had curled up on Luke's bed with Brooke and gone to sleep.
Peyton lay still for a moment thinking before slipping out of the bed and padding along to the kitchen to grab a morning cup of coffee before heading over to the hospital to finish her conversation with Lucas. A short while later she scribbled a note to the others in case they got worried she'd run off again and slipped quietly out of the house. Climbing into her car she glanced into her rear-view mirror and smiled at her reflection. She wasn't going to be winning any beauty prizes today especially in the best hairstyle category. Turning the ignition key she set of for the short drive to the hospital mentally rehearsing everything she wanted to say to him. She'd spent the evening before and the time lying on his bed thinking about Lucas and what he'd said to her now she wanted to rehearse what she was going to say to him or else she'd probably mess it up again.
Arriving at the hospital Peyton was glad to see there were few other cars parked up, none of which she recognised, so thankfully none of the others had the same idea of getting up early and coming here. She pulled into a parking bay and took one last rueful glance into the mirror before walking into the building. The old fear of hospitals gripped her as she walked through the doors but for the first time in years she banished it totally from her mind as she rapidly made her way up to the ward Lucas was on.
Taking a deep cleansing breath (as one of Brooke's fashion magazines would have said) Peyton turned the handle of Luke's door and peered in hoping he was already awake. Her heart flipped inside her chest as she took in the sight of Lucas lying there pale with his eye firmly closed. She crept into the room and sat in the chair next to his bed ready to wait for him to wake up although not willing to wait too long. She sat back getting comfortable and fixed her eyes on his face feeling the love she felt for this broody young blonde swelling up within as she waited for him to open his strikingly blue eyes.
Luke stirred with the pain radiating from his shoulder making him wince and the fluorescent lighting above his bed shining into his eyes reminding of where he was and what had happened. He opened his eyes slowly allowing them to adjust to the brightness of the room as his headache reappeared. The sound of someone breathing made him jerk his head sharply left. A second or two later her realised how dumb an idea that had been as the dull throb in his head and shoulder turned into a bloody sledge hammer pounding "Jesus!" he hissed as the pain climaxed "Remind me not to do THAT again." The blonde girl at his bedside started awake as he moved, concern flashing across her beautiful face as he swore. He smiled reassuringly as he waited for the pain to ebb slightly before whispering "Hey!"
Peyton started awake as Luke turned towards her. His face drained as he moved and he swore, at the pain she guessed, and her heart skipped as she met his eyes, concern and love warring within her. She leant forwards to touch his face and jumped as he smiled that old crooked smile and whispered to her "Hey". Stroking his hair she leant in until their foreheads touched and murmured "I love you Lucas, not because of what you can give me but because of what you can take. You take away the pain and loneliness I feel every day and leave behind only warmth. I love the me I am when I'm with you and I don't no, can't lose that. Sometimes in life you have to fight hard just to make love survive, with us we've always fought hard against it and despite that it's only grown stronger. In true love real strength is knowing when to give up the fight and just let go, let go of those barriers, those walls. You are the only true person to ever break my walls down and I love you for it. I guess what I'm really saying, again, is I love you, I'm in love with you and, if you'll have me, I'm yours". She held her breath staring into his blue eyes as she waited for his answer.
Luke smiled and, instead of speaking, leant in the last few inches between them and kissed her tenderly. For the first time since he'd known Peyton Sawyer there were no barriers between them being together, no other partners, no fear and no games, nothing at all. Lying in his hospital bed he could see a future stretching out, a long road spanning all the years left in his life and beside him every step was Peyton. He pulled out of the kiss slightly breathless and gently pulled Peyton down beside him, pulling her in close to him where he knew she would stay forever.
"Whenever I cried he would always make me feel like he would change the world if he could so it couldn't hurt me anymore. Now I'm crying and he's not here. He'll never be here again. I lay there in Luke's arms a week ago knowing that we were going to be together until we were both old and grey. I remember leaving the room to get a coffee and returning to find a nurse outside waiting for me. Lucas had died and yet before doing so had asked the nurse to give me one last message. He asked her to tell me two things. That he loved me and that he would be waiting for me until I was ready to join him. I remember crying in that instant as I fell to the ground hating Luke for leaving me. Now all I feel is alone. There's a place in my heart where his fingerprints still rest, where his kisses still linger on and his whispers echo. It's a place where a part of Luke will always be a part of me but it's just not enough. That's why I left you this note Haley, so people will understand why I've done this. I love him and his death left a wound no one can heal so I've decided to stop trying and to join him instead. Goodbye Hales. Tell Brooke, Nate and my Dad that I'm sorry for hurting them again but I just can't be without him."
Haley choked back a sob as she stood in the chapel, with Peyton's last letter in her hand, looking over the crowd in front of her " Peyton left me this note to explain why she killed herself but it was never really needed. Anyone who truly knew Peyton knew that when Luke died she died too. Peyton and Luke were my two greatest friends and I loved them totally. I miss them a little I guess you could say, a little too much, a little too often and a little more each day. Together they would have been amazing but alone they were nothing without each other. I wish Peyton hadn't things this way but at least I can take some comfort in knowing that now, wherever they are, their journey is over. They're finally together…….. forever."
