Futures

Chapter 4:

Method Acting

The house was alive with voices and laughter; what had started off as a few people coming over to see Garret had grown into a full-fledged gathering in Peyton and Jake's home. Brooke could hear their voices drifting from the kitchen into her secluded spot in the living room. They were watching Nathan's basketball game on television, cheering and clapping. She had drifted away from the group. Their conversations kept drifting back to Lucas, who wasn't present. They were worried about him. She could hear the silent accusation directed towards her in their voices.

Garret was sleeping in her arms. She had taken him from Peyton when the young mother excused herself to go check on Jenny who was asleep upstairs. Brooke spoke softly to her godson.

"You know you're a lucky kid little Jagielski, because you have got the best mom any little boy could ask for," she smiled as his forehead wrinkled slightly in his sleep, "And you're dad is just about the sweetest guy to ever come out of this place. Plus I've totally got this god mother thing on lock down."

She felt a tinge of guilt. In a couple days time she'd be headed back to New York. She had no idea when she would see Garrett again. When she would see Peyton, Haley, Jamie and all of the people she spent her days missing.

Her eyes drifted towards the other room where her friends, well they had been her friends once, were gathered. She felt terribly disconnected from all of them and their lives. She barely had time to email Peyton and Haley. She didn't have time for friends, no time for fun. What was it they had promised each other at the river court four years ago? "We're always going to be friends." Maybe that had been unrealistic.

"Hey Brooke did Peyton come downstairs yet?" Jake leaned into the room, his eyes on the staircase with a hint of concern.

"Not yet," she answered and then gestured to Garret with her chin, "Why don't you take him and I'll go find the new mom."

He smiled and took several steps towards her before lifting his son from her arms. Brooke watched in delight as his face lit up as he stared down at the infant. She placed a hand on his arm.

"I'm really happy for you guys. You really deserve it."

She turned towards the stairs and Jake stopped her with his voice, that small familiar smile playing on his lips.

"You deserve it too Brooke."

Not much had changed in what she had always known as the Sawyer home, what had really always been her home too when she thought about it. At their youngest the two girls had spent hours in the backyard, skinning their knees practicing their tumbles and then plopping down in the living room; Brooke painting her nails while Peyton, even at twelve, complained about the lack of good music on MTV. That hadn't stopped them from learning all the choreography to every Nsync and Spice Girls video. Once high school came though, Peyton's bedroom became their sanctuary. It was where they talked about boys, held each other through hard times, where they fought but always made up.

The room was different now. The reds and blacks of Peyton's angst ridden adolescence were now replaced with a soft green and a complementing pink on the woodwork. The drawings Brooke had always called 'creepy' but never really felt that way about were gone. There was a hand painted toy chest, a learner's acoustic guitar. A mural of a peaceful, cloud filled sky stretched across the wall above Jenny's sleeping bed. Peyton was sitting against the wall on the far side of the room, contemplative as she watched her daughter sleep. Brooke slid down beside her.

"It's kinda weird that this isn't your room anymore," she observed in a half whisper and Peyton smiled softly.

"This room meant a lot to me growing up, I want it to be the same for her you know? A place to always feel safe."

Brooke could remember the moment when Peyton had confided in her that she and Jake were engaged. It was just weeks after the school shooting, the blonde still walked with the slightest limp and they were celebrating Nathan and Haley's second engagement. Peyton's eyes had been dancing with happiness as she explained to her best friend that she was going to finish up senior year, at Jake's insistence, and then she'd be moving to Savannah to be with him and Jenny. It was the happiest Brooke had seen her friend since they were children. It had been half a year later when she'd gotten the phone call from Peyton. "Niki gave up her parental rights Brooke. She just showed up here and told us that she was sorry for everything and that she wasn't cut out for motherhood. I'm going to be Jenny's mom Brooke, I'm really going to be her mom."

In between the two moments of joy there had been Ian Banks, who had almost ruined any chance Peyton would ever have at happiness. He had been an Internet stalker posing as a long lost brother. Peyton had embraced him initially; glad to have a distraction from the time away from Jake. And then Ian had gotten scary. When they figured out that he wasn't Peyton's brother at all, but instead an obsessive fan of her website Peyton had gotten on a plane to Savannah. She hadn't known she was being watched. Brooke still wasn't exactly sure of all the details. She just knew that in the end Ian had become one of the few people to feel the wrath of Jake Jagielski at his angriest.

Peyton deserved the amazing life she finally had, the chance to just be happy for once.

"You're a good mom Peyton."

The blonde glanced at her with worried eyes.

"Do you really think that? Am I actually ok at this?"

"You're more than okay," Brooke assured taking her friend's hand.

Peyton stared down at their interlocked fingers before glancing up at Brooke, the insecurities that had showed so rarely in the past several years making an appearance in her eyes.

"I just get scared you know. Do you remember when I found out about Ellie? How mad I was at my dad? I know that Niki gave up her parental rights but I also know that I would never really be able to stay away from my babies. I'm terrified that she is going to show up one day and Jenny is going to look at me the way I looked at my dad," Peyton's eyes began to glaze over with tears, "God Brooke I don't ever want either of my kids to feel an ounce of the confusion and anger I felt. I don't ever want Jenny to look at me and not see me as her mom."

"Peyton that's never going to happen, trust me. I have seen the way Jenny looks at you, like you have the power to fix any problem the world might throw her way. And I've seen the way you look at her, and let me tell you I would have done anything for my mom to look at me like that when I was growing up. That is enough, it always will be."

Peyton sniffled through her tears and Brooke dabbed at them with the sleeve of her shirt before smiling.

"And besides, if one day she paints her walls black, locks herself in her room, decides to open a night club or starts dating a guy with a baby, I think you're prepared."

Peyton giggled quietly,

"I missed you Brooke."

"Miss you everyday P. But do you mind if I duck our early? There's someone I have to talk to."

"And with his 9th three of the night Scott is all but going to mark the W on the scorecard for the Cougars. The buzzer will wind down now as the North Carolina fans celebrate the sixth consecutive win for their new NBA franchise,"

In the background, a buzzer sounded and thousands of fans erupted into applause and cheering. They donned Scott jerseys and praised their hometown boy for bringing basketball back to North Carolina. The new Cougars franchise had made it their mission to have an authentic hometown team. Drafting a local hero like Nathan right out of college had guaranteed fans in the stands. They'd even hired a young, fresh announcer, also a local boy. Their method was working. The team was selling out and winning games. People liked it when their team actually represented them.

Some miles away Lucas Scott sat behind a creaky wooden desk and imagined what his brother was feeling at that very second, what it felt like to really be there.

" Alright folks this is Mouth Mcfarland signing off for the still undefeated Charlotte Cougars. Stay tuned for the post show and enjoy your night."

Lucas switched off the black transistor radio that sat on the edge of his desk and shook his head clear of his thoughts. The sudden disappearance of cheering crowds, sneakers squeaking against wood and Mouth's familiar voice made the quiet of the school all that more evident. He was alone in the building; even the janitors had gone home at this hour.

The health tests on his desk still sat mostly unmarked. Coaching came hand in hand with teaching and while Lucas had gotten his certification in college, he wasn't exactly enthusiastic about being in charge of a health class.

Instead of focusing on them he stared around the office that he still thought of as Whitey's. There had been several temporary coaches that had managed to mangle the Ravens good name during the years he was away at college but this office had never really belonged to any of them. Lucas still didn't feel like it belonged to him; he still felt like he was sitting on the wrong side of the desk.

The team photo of the championship Ravens hung on his wall, their trophy perched in front of them. Beside it hung the photo from he and Nathan's first championship at Gilmore, where Whitey had taught Lucas what it meant to be a coach.

There were more photos, staring at him from across the desk. The oldest was from his high school graduation. Himself, Nathan, Haley, Peyton, Brooke, Mouth and Skills stood in their gowns before the ceremony, arms draped around each other's shoulders. He couldn't help but smile at how naive they had been. None of them had any idea how things were going to turn out, no idea who they were going to be. Another frame held a picture of Jamie in his peewee league basketball uniform. There was another of himself and Nathan on his brother's wedding day, their arms around one another's shoulders and the connecting frame held a photo of him and Haley, when they were only fourteen, making faces into the camera.

He wasn't sure if he had drifted too far down memory lane or if she was really there when Brooke appeared in the threshold of the office, a nervous smile playing on her beautiful face.

"I was hoping we could talk coach," she suggested quietly and he forced himself to sit up from his slouched posture and gestured to the chair across from him. She was wearing a black skirt and green top under a cropped cardigan that she smoothed anxiously as she sat.

"If this is about new cheerleading uniforms I have no control over those expenses Ms. Davis," he teased easily, trying to lift the awkward air between them and she smiled. He tried not to let it show as his breath caught in his throat.

"So everyone was at Peyton and Jake's. We missed you," she stated in her husky voice with a quirked eyebrow, "But now that I'm here I totally get it. Who wouldn't pass up hanging with their friends to sit in a dark, creepy office all alone?"

He laughed and shook his head. He couldn't come right out and tell her that he hadn't been there because she had. Because saying they were friends didn't make seeing her any easier.

"I'm marking quizzes that I should have handed back a week ago."

She reached across the desk and snatched one of the papers away, chuckling as her eyes scanned it.

"Sex Ed huh?" her eyes were amused and just a hint mischievous as she spoke, "From what I remember, the kids at THS could have taught the teachers a thing or two about sex ed." She replaced the quiz and then looked at him seriously, "Everyone is worried about you Luke."

"Ahh," he placed his hands behind his head and glanced towards the ceiling, "They worry too much."

"Haley maybe worries too much. Skills never worries and tonight he told me that he thinks you spend too much time alone."

"I have always spent a lot of time alone," he reminded, "I'm broody remember?"

The reference to her old nickname for him sent her mind fumbling, for some reason causing a sting of pain in her chest.

"Yea," she admitted quietly but shook her head, "Look I've seen you push people away before when something was going on in here," she pointed to her heart, "I don't want to see that happen again."

"Yea well," his voice held a tinge of bitterness as he sat forward, "I got burned pretty bad."

She stared back at him hard, trying not to let her eyes betray her strong front.

"You know that I'm sorry Lucas. I'm sorry everyday for hurting you, but do not think for one second that I didn't hurt or that I still don't, but you don't know everything…"

"Ok can we not do this," he held up a hand, "You didn't want to marry me Brooke, it isn't that hard to comprehend."

"Stop it," she felt her teeth gritting together with anger, "Stop acting like you know everything and stop acting like you didn't catch me completely off guard and that your entire proposal wasn't fueled by fear."

"Fear? And here I thought I did it out of love!" he shouted incredulously, throwing his hands into the air and then pointing a finger at her, "Face that facts Brooke, you were the scared one. You could never really trust me. You said no to me because you were still holding a mistake I made when I was sixteen over my head!"

"Don't," she hissed, closing her eyes and willing away tears, "You're right that I can't ever think about that time without feeling like someone is stabbing me in the heart. But you are wrong if you think I didn't trust you. I trusted you more than I have ever trusted anyone in my life Lucas and you didn't even deserve it. You proposed to me because you were scared of losing me, because whether you want to admit it or not you still hurt in your heart all the time because your father left you, and because you lost Keith and you were scared that I was going to abandon you too."

He shook his head angrily.

"So Brooke Davis is a psychologist now? I didn't know fashion majors took heavy classes like that."

"I'm not going to do this," she reached for her purse and stood, her voice even raspier than usual with tears, "I'm not going to sit here and let you use me as a verbal punching bag because you don't want to accept the truth. And there are things you don't know Lucas, so stop judging me."

She turned and marched out of the office leaving Lucas once again left alone in his empty office, his head buried in his hands.

Ok you guys, don't kill me. I know it's been forever. A billion and one things decided to happen at once. I promise this story will be finished. So I really hope this chapter doesn't completely suck. There should be about 4 or 5 more chapters going by my original outline, but that could grow. We'll see. Finally some Brucas confrontation, what do you think?