Black Eyes and Drunken Misdemeanours
A/N: It all starts with a bottle of sake and a punch. Hints to a one night stand, but nothing explicit. KakaSaku oneshot. Please R&R, no flames. I'll only flame you back. Hope you like the story, so here goes. Based on an idea from Shikari The welsh ninja.
"Naruto-kun! What on Earth happened to your eye?" Haruno Sakura stared at the black eye her blond team-mate was sporting.
"Um…" Naruto seemed at a loss for words.
"Let me heal that for you!" She rushed to help him. "Where's Kakashi-sensei?" Naruto gawped at her.
"You mean…you don't know where he is? But…" He shook his head in surprise. "You…"
"What? What did I do? Why should I know where Kakashi-sensei is?"
"Maybe you should start calling him Kakashi-sempai…and maybe you should sit down." Naruto looked awkward.
"Okay – but tell me who did this to you?"
"That's kind of part of the story." Naruto gave a weak smile. "You did." Sakura's emerald eyes widened in disbelief.
"But – I wasn't that drunk. Okay, I have a bit of a hangover, but still…" She trailed off. "Why did I punch you, Naruto-kun?"
"Um, you…well, it's a long story."
"We have a long time. Tell me." Sakura pouted, and Naruto weakened.
"Okay. Well, me, you and Sasuke-teme went out for the night, to get drunk, you know."
"I remember that bit, Naruto. Get to the important bit." Sakura snapped impatiently, and Naruto gave her an anxious glance.
"Well, we ran into Kakashi-sensei, Iruka-sensei, Genma, Gai, Asuma, Anko and Kurenai. I started talking to Iruka-sensei, and Sasuke was chatting – well, okay, not chatting, more grunting in response, to Anko. We didn't see what you were doing, but when I looked back, you and Kakashi were – um." A wave of panic gripped Sakura. What the hell had she done?
"Naruto-kun, please. What did I do?"
"You, um, were kissing Kakashi-sensei…" Naruto broke off to pat a choking Sakura on the back. "He didn't look too upset, actually. So I asked if maybe you should stop, because Genma had started taking bets with Iruka-sensei on how long Kakashi would last before he – well, you don't need to know that. Anyway, you got angry, and punched me, before dragging Kakashi out of the bar."
"Why did I do that? And I don't remember a thing!" Sakura's eyes welled up.
"Don't cry, Sakura-chan, please. You don't remember anything at all?" Sakura shook her head. Oh, wait, that wasn't quite true…she remembered Kakashi's surprised face when she pulled his mask down…Oh, Kami. She'd pulled his mask down!
"We…did we?" She was talking to herself, how could Naruto know what she and Kakashi had done? "I'll never live this down. What will – oh Kami, here comes Genma! Hide me!"
"Too late. He's seen us, he's coming over." Naruto looked at Sakura's stricken face. "Look, it's okay, he probably spied on you, he'll know what happened." This thought did not comfort Sakura.
"Hey! Genma, did you spy on Kakashi and Sakura last night?" Naruto yelled. Genma looked mildly worried about the mental health of the kyuubi vessel, before replying:
"I do have some morals, you know." Naruto looked disappointed, "I just bugged the room." Genma added. Naruto flew over, followed closely by Sakura.
"Since I can't remember a damned thing about last night, I want to hear!" Sakura yelled. Genma merely looked amused.
"Okay, okay, here you go." He handed her a small portable cassette player. "I was listening to it…"
"You sicko." Sakura hissed, before switching the cassette on.
"Um, Sakura, this isn't a good idea." She vaguely remembered Kakashi saying that the previous night.
"Just because you used to be my sensei." She cringed at her own voice.
"No, because you probably won't remember anything about this tomorrow, and I don't want you hurt by rumours." Bit late for that, Sakura observed, noticing Genma's lopsided grin.
"Who cares?"
"You'll care. I care. I care about you, Sakura, and I can't let this happen." Sakura couldn't help sighing at Kakashi's reasonable argument, and gasping at his admission that he cared for her. Just pray he didn't give in to me.
"Do you mean that, K-kakashi?"
"Yes, I do. But you're drunk, and you need to sleep."
"Boring."
"I'll use the sharingan if you want. No dreams."
"That s-sounds good." The tape went fuzzy, indicating the end of the conversation between them. Sakura heaved a sigh of relief, and handed the tape back to Genma, her eyes flashing.
"I'm not going to beat you up, Genma, don't look so worried." She almost giggled at the jonin's face.
"Um, why not?" Naruto asked. "He taped your conversation."
"Without said conversation, I could have spent the rest of the day agonising over whether Kakashi and I had done anything I would regret."
"But would you regret it?" Genma asked loftily.
"Of c-" She broke off to think about the question. What was the honest answer? Genma took her hesitation as a no, and smirked.
"Well there you go. No way am I missing this conversation! Oh look, here's Iruka." He folded his arms, chewing on his senbon. Sakura glared at him, but didn't send him away with any broken limbs.
"Iruka-sensei." Sakura swallowed hard.
"Sakura-chan. You owe me fifty ryo, Genma. Nothing happened, did it?" Sakura's face reddened.
"Genma…" She hissed. If he lied to win the bet with Iruka, she really would kill him. But he shook his head.
"Not that she didn't want it to, here, listen to this." He managed to pass the cassette player to Iruka before Sakura's fist connected with the side of his head.
"Ow." He rubbed his chin. "You didn't even use any chakra."
"I can if you want." Sakura said threatingly.
"I think I'll pass, thanks." Genma smirked.
"Well…" Iruka passed the cassette back to Genma. "Hand the money over, then." Reluctantly, Genma handed over fifty ryo.
"Oh look, here come Gai and Jiraiya." Iruka pointed out the manic youth-lover and Icha Icha author.
"Just what I need." Sakura sighed. Naruto patted her shoulder comfortingly. Well, Naruto thought it was comforting, but Sakura just felt like crawling into a hole and never resurfacing.
"Sakura-chan! Gai was just telling me about the joys of Kakashi rediscovering his youth!" Naruto and Genma both dissolved into fits of hysterical laughter. Iruka merely handed over the cassette.
"Oh, interesting…" Jiraiya murmured, seemingly deep in thought.
"Write me into Icha Icha and you won't live long enough to regret it!" Sakura snarled. Jiraiya stopped looking pensive.
"Anyone else going to come and laugh at me?" She groaned as Anko, Kurenai and Asuma wandered over.
"Remember anything?" Anko asked eagerly. Her face fell when Genma informed her nothing had happened between the two, and handed her the cassette tape as proof.
"Oi, let me listen to it, then." Asuma grabbed the cassette player as soon as Anko had finished with it.
"HERE HE COMES! THE MAN OF THE MOMENT!" Jiraiya yelled. Sakura sighed. It seemed Jiraiya had been taking elocution lessons from Naruto.
"Maybe you could all, I don't know, get lost?" Naruto suggested. Jiraiya, Genma, Anko and Asuma seemed to find this funny.
"No way, I'm sticking around for the fireworks!" Anko laughed. Sakura glared at them all, but only succeeded in making Naruto take a couple of steps backwards. Kakashi sauntered along nonchalantly, face buried in Icha Icha Tactics. If he was surprised to see practically the entire jonin population of Konohagakure waiting to welcome him, he didn't show it. Genma was still passing the cassette player around, and whispering,
"Forty ryo he takes her home with him tonight and something actually happens."
"He's too chicken." Anko laughed, shaking hands with the orally fixated ninja. Gai, overhearing, said:
"He is merely honouring Sakura-chan's youthfulness. There is no shame in that, surely?"
"I thought you were meant to be his eternal rival, Gai!" Kurenai laughed at the green jumpsuit-clad man.
"Hello everyone." Kakashi's visible eye scanned the shinobi before him. "Any reason you lot have flocked to greet me, apart from the obvious?" The jonin shook their heads.
"Okay, the show's over, leave!" Naruto yelled. The jonin shook their heads again. They had already said they would stay and watch. Genma casually produced a bag of toffee popcorn, and the shinobi settled on the park bench to see what was going to happen.
Sakura stared at the silver-haired man slouching in front of her, Icha Icha in his left hand. Wordlessly, he stepped forward, and grabbing hold of arms, disappeared in a cloud of smoke. Genma turned to Anko.
"You owe me forty ryo."