Hopelessly In Love.

Disclaimer: I still don't own anything. ):

Warning: Implied one sided slash (R/E). Slight angst.

Author's Note: This is only my second attempt at writing slash, and it's also my first try at writing mainly about someone other than Eric. So, heh, I hope it's good (even though it's super short). Enjoy! Constructive criticism is always appreciated. (:

He may hate my guts with every ounce of his being, but I don't care.

He may think of me as annoying, but I don't care.

He may love Calleigh Duquesne, but I don't care.

I don't care because I love him. Truly, deeply, undeniably love him.

And I know he doesn't love me back. I know he never will. And honestly, I can't expect him too. I never will, I never have. He's always been a lady's man, and I know that. I know it and I'm content to just watching from the sidelines. After all, what lady's man would fall for me? Not him, never him. Eric Delko would never fall for someone such as me. And no matter how much it tears me apart inside, I deal with it. Because telling him would destroy the small amount of progress we've made in our relationship. Some may even consider us friends, and I don't want to ruin that. I can't.

I can't give up what I have, what's right in front of me, just to tell him and have him mad at me. Have him avoid me. Have him disgusted, barely send anything more than a small glance my way. I can't do it. I know what I have and even though it's not much, and it never will be, it's more than I would have if I decided to tell him. And I don't care how much it hurts, because it would hurt a million times worse. I would rather him shoot me, stab a knife in my side, take out my intestines -- whatever he felt like he needed to, I would let him, without telling him. Because I wouldn't be able to handle it.

So yes, I settle for what I have. Watching him walk in the hallways, watching him from the corner of my eye at a crime scene, taking every chance I can possibly get and using every excuse in the book just to talk to him. I know it sounds like I'm in junior high but I do it, I do it all everyday. And I can't help that surge of jealousy that I get when I see him flirting with someone, whether it be some random girl or Calleigh. And I can't help how afraid I get when he's in danger, no matter what -- whether he's driving on a rainy day or at a shooting, I can't help it. I always want to be in his place, going through with the danger for him, because if he were to die I don't know what I'd do. At least I know that if I were to die, he wouldn't be torn up about it. At least I know he'll always be able to survive it.

And honestly, I'm not sure if that's good or bad.

Because I, Ryan Wolfe, am hopelessly in love with Eric Delko.