His head was full, full with stuff. Memories, sadness, thoughts. Lucas was walking through the streets of Tree Hill. There was no destiny on his way. Where he would end up, he didn't know. He didn't care.
His mind and body worked separated. His mind was full with memories, memories from his uncle Keith. Lucas cried inside, his heart was bleeding, while his legs carried him around.
Suddenly his legs stopped walking. Lucas looked up from the road for the first time this evening. He was looking at the front door of Peyton's house. He didn't move, didn't think. He just stood there, staring at the house. In the house there was darkness. Lucas took a deep breath. And he entered her house, knowing she was there. The door was unlocked, like always.
While Lucas was walking around in her house, Peyton lay in her bed. She tried to sleep, but she couldn't. She was tired, but she just couldn't sleep. Memories of the last couple of days were in her mind, they held her awake. Her pillow was wet, wet from her tears. Maybe if she cried long enough, she would fall asleep, she thought. But that was not the only reason why she was crying. She cried for so much more. Because the pain in her leg was almost unbearable, because Keith Scott wasn't anymore, because her life was messed up in every way, because she suddenly missed everyone and the most because she didn't know how to act when Lucas Scott was near.
With her closed eyes, she lay on her bed. Slowly she felt herself slip away in the world of dreams. Suddenly she heard a voice. "Hi Peyton." She opened her eyes, in her doorway stood Lucas Scott. First she felt a shower of cold feelings, but when she looked into his deep blue eyes, she felt the heat of her body warming up again. "Bad timing?" He asked. "No." She whispered. "Are you sure, it looked to me that you were sleeping." His face was worried. "No, I was just pretending." He laughed, his voice sounded so good as he laughed. He walked into her room. "May I?" He looked to the bed. Peyton began to lose control. That Lucas was here, talking to her, just like he normally would do. But this isn't normal, not after what happened. How could he just walk in her and pretend that nothing was happened. "Peyton?" Lucas looked worried. "Oh yeah, sure." She answered quickly. He smiled softly. Beautiful girl, Lucas smiled, just thinking of that.
"What brings you here? It's late." Lucas was sitting on her bed. First there was silence, but then he finally began to speak. His voice broken. "I just can't take it anymore. It's too much. I just needed to get out of that place." A single tear rolled off his cheek. Peyton touched his hand gently. He looked up, his eyes full with tears. "Hey, Lucas, it's okay." She looked him, into his beautiful blue eyes, eyes full with tears. "No, it's not okay Peyton!" He yelled. "It's not!" He started to cry. Peyton was speechless. Lucas Scott was crying! Her hero, the strongest boy in her life, he was crying. His world was collapsed, by the death of one person. Keith Scott!
She wanted to hug him, but she couldn't move because of her hurt leg. "Luke …" Peyton fingers touched Lucas hand. "Luke, what's wrong, has something happen?" His face turned from confused to anger. "Keith died Peyton!" He yelled, his eyes turned black. "He died, and now my mom hates me! I took her love away, she is never going to forgive me for that! Years she had waited for love, she was going to marry him Peyton! And now he's dead! Because he came after me! It's my fault!" She wanted to say something, but he didn't give her a chance. "And Brooke, she doesn't understand me! And the whole world is feeling sorry for Jimmy! But not for my uncle! No not for Keith. They are not feeling sorry for my … father!" Tears were in his eyes, but he refused to cry. "Sshh" Peyton softly whispered. She moved her body a little, trying to get to his side. She tried to stifle her groans.
Lucas heard her suffer. "Peyton? Are you okay?" In a few seconds Lucas changed complete. From a broken guy who cried, he sudden was a worried and protective boy. "Peyton?" With a worried face, he looked at her, seeing her face in a painful grimace. "It's okay. It's just my leg." She whispered in pain. Tears stood in her eyes. "Are you sure, you don't look okay." His hand brushed against her cheek. Peyton was amazed by his touch. "You should rest."
Peyton closed her eyes and lay down. Lucas lay next to her. She between the sheets and he above them. Twenty minutes later, Peyton opened her eyes again. She found Lucas staring at her.
"Hi sleepy." He whispered softly. "Hi." Peyton whispered. Lucas pressed a sweet kiss on her forehead. "How's your leg?" His blue eyes still looked worried. "Its fine I guess." The silence came back.
"Can I see the injury?" Peyton was surprised when Lucas asked. "O-okay." She answered. She wanted to lift up the sheets, but then she realized she was only wearing a shirt and underwear. Lucas saw her hesitation. "Are you sure you're fine with it?" "Yeah, it's all right but …" Her voice faded away. "What Peyton?" He expected an awful answer, he held his breath. "I'm not very stylish at the moment, if you know what I mean." She smiled shyly. Lucas let his breath escape. "Ah, okay. Wait, I'll get you pants, or a skirt or something." Lucas stood up and grabbed a pair of green shorts and laid it on the bed. "I'll go outside, so you can have your privacy, call me when you're ready." He walked out the door. "Lucas, it's okay. It will take forever to get them on." He smiled. "And by the way, I just can't get dressed. If I want to, somebody's got to help me." Lucas looked at her, eyes full warmth.
Slowly Peyton took away the sheets. She still was uncomfortable, Lucas had seen her in other ways before, but still, it was weird. Lucas took Peyton's hand and squeezed it gently, letting her know she was brave. The white bandage appeared. Peyton took it off. The wound appeared. First Lucas looked at it. "Does it hurt that much, because it looks like it does?" He asked worried, it was a horrible wound. Peyton shook her head. "It's okay, for things like this, they have painkillers." She smiled sweetly. "But I guess you didn't take one today." She nodded. "I forgot." Lucas eyes looked worried. "Forgot? Peyton? You're suffering, you need to take them!" Peyton felt guilty, she didn't want to make Lucas angry or worried about her. He saved her life, and he has gone through a lot lately. "I know, but I just wanted to know if I'm strong enough to do without. Luke, I don't want to feel weak anymore, this is not going to get me, like everything else did." Lucas pulled her in a hug. "It's okay Peyton, it's all okay now."
Moments of silence. Lucas and Peyton lay both down on her bed. Peyton with her eyes closed, Lucas just lay besides her, watching her. And suddenly, out of the blue, Lucas lips kissed Peyton leg. The spot next to the shot wound. She screamed, the pain in her leg was too strong to hold in silence. Lucas stifled Peyton's scream by pressing his lips on hers. His hands were everywhere, they slowly and softly disappeared under her shirt. "Lucas." She whispered. Lucas kissed Peyton's shoulder. Her hands grabbed his shoulders, so he needed to look Peyton in the eyes. "Lucas, you're confused, you're hurt. But you need to let Brooke in, she deserves it." Lucas shook his head. "No Peyton." He couldn't hear the name Brooke right now. "Peyton, she won't understand. She can't understand. She will never understand." Tears were in his eyes. "She don't know how it feels, losing someone. You know it Peyton. You lost your mom, you lost Ellie. You understand how it feels, the pain. The damn pain!" Peyton held Lucas' head between her hands. "Lucas." She whispered. "You don't deserve this, Lucas. I'm feeling so sorry for you." Her hand brushed through his hair. "But you're confused. Go home, go to sleep Luke." Lucas' face was upset. An angry tone reflecting in his voice.
"Didn't you mean anything from what you said in the library?! Didn't you mean anything?!" Lucas almost yelled the words, she could feel herself slip away into the darkness of her mind. "You didn't mean a thing?" He yelled. "Lucas." She softly whispered. "Not a word?!" She saw that strange look in his eyes, the look of endless darkness. "Please, Luke I was confused." She shook her head. "No, I'm sorry." Her heart was falling into pieces, lying, knowing she loved Lucas so much. "Not one single word." He almost cried. "Please Lucas, don't..." Before she even could finish her sentence. Lucas pressed his lips on hers. Peyton was overwhelmed by the sudden touch. She moved her lips a little. "Lair!" Lucas shouted when he broke off the kiss. "You meant it!" Peyton looked in Lucas eyes and saw through all the pain, his everlasting fire. The emotions that were stuck in her finally came out. She took his head between her hands and kissed his velvet lips. Lucas hold her close, he wanted this girl. Confused or not. When he was with Brooke, Lucas always saw Peyton in a way. He found himself too often looking at a picture of Brooke, Peyton and himself. And he totally zoomed out on Peyton. Asking himself how that beautiful girl, became so broken. When he was with her, he didn't think of Brooke. He only could think of that girl with the blond hair who's life was pretty messed up.
Lucas pressed his lips on her again. His hands caressed Peyton's belly. Her body reacted on his touch, pleasure filled her body. Her mind screamed NO, but her body ached for his touch. Lucas took off Peyton's shirt, his velvet lips slid against the nape of her neck. His fingers played around her bra.
"What are we doing?" Lucas' voice sounded confused. "Peyton?" He asked hoarse. Peyton was breathing fast. "Luke …" she whispered so quiet that Lucas didn't hear it. Her lips kissed his cheek. "This is wrong … Peyton, what are we doing? It's wrong." Lucas' voice sounded weird, he began to lose control, his eyes became two dark pools on his face. "Wrong. It's wrong." He kept whispering. Lucas turned away from her.
"Lucas." She said softly. Two sad eyes looked at Peyton, two blue sad eyes from Lucas. His mouth went open, he wanted to say something. But Peyton wouldn't let it happen. She could almost hear the hurting words in her ears.
"I'm sorry." He was going to say "I'm so sorry Peyton. But it's wrong, this is wrong. I love Brooke, not you."
Yeah, that was what he would say. But he was lying if he said that. He thought he didn't love her. But if he looked into his heart, under all the Brooke-stuff, in the deepest place. The special place in his heart, locked with a key. He would find a pretty girl with blond hair and green eyes staring at him. Whispering that she loved him. She was holding the key, and only she could open his heart and put down the walls he had around him. The walls that protect him from hurting Brooke or someone else. But he was hurting himself, keeping all his feelings inside.
Peyton took Lucas' hand and laid it on her heart. Lucas could feel her heart beating. Her heart was beating fast, like his heart. Looking in her green eyes, feeling her heart beating, he suddenly realised something. Gentle he took her hand and laid it on his heart, so she could feel is heart beating. Peyton looked into Lucas' blue eyes. Looking into each others eyes, they realised that their hearts were beating at the same rhythm.
They were sharing different heartbeats in one night.
They lay there on her bed. Making love, not really realizing it. Lips kissed, fingers touched, eyes looked and words were spoken. Spirits were with them. Watching how Lucas and Peyton fell into their desire. Keith Scott, Rebecca Anna Sawyer and Elizabeth Harp better known as 'Ellie' watched at the boy and the girl they had loved, while they were on earth. Their thoughts were the same; maybe they're making a mistake, maybe all the sadness has become confusion, confusion that needed to get out in any way that was possible, maybe this is lust based on they both know they shouldn't have or maybe ... this is the destiny of a true love.
Lucas and Peyton were making love, sweet and gentle. But there was still something missing. The fact that both hearts were still on lock, after all still unsure about their feelings for each other. The fact that in a way, this really was wrong. But memories came back, the first meeting, time passed. Feelings came back, the heated up passion …