Moving On

A Tribute to KarinxToushirou

"You're injured? Well then, I guess I have no choice." Hitsugaya Toushirou's face reflected reluctance as his feet juggled the ball with utmost precision.

A shinigami. A death god.

Those simple words astonished her because she would never grasp their magnitude, just like she would never fully understand the enigmatic white-haired captain.

Ever since that day, the day of the soccer game and hollow attack, he had stood there at every sunset. The same worn-out trail. The same chipped metal railing. His eyes gazed tensely at the open sky. His fingers fumbled and toyed with the faux cell phone in his hands. Everyday, he would sit there with his deceiving posture and contemplating eyes. About what? Maybe he was reminiscing about the last hollow battle. Or how troublesome his huge-chested lieutenant was. Or maybe a childhood sweetheart he left behind. Karin would never know for sure.

She always gazed from a distance with something holding back her desire to approach him. He was an alien from a separate dimension. Someone important with an agenda of incomparable gravity. Finally, one day she plucked her courage and discarded her hesitation.

"I know you're this incredibly important shinigami captain and everything, but if you have the time, you're always welcome to join us in a soccer game." Those inquisitive ice-blue eyes always held a tension and maturity that was slightly unnerving in comparison to his childish face and body.

"I'll consider it," he replied with respectable seriousness.

Karin's smile faltered. "Saa, I'll be at the park."

To her surprise, the heavy weight of disappointment sagged down her heart. What should I have expected? Running back to the park, she gazed at the sky. Every sunset would be different. Some would be meshed with a myriad of rainbows with a subtle blend of tangerines and magentas. Others would be dreary and plain, covered in sheets of sleet-gray clouds.

-xxx-

That day, the clouds wept rain. At first the sky only drizzled, until the torrents came in thick sheets. Peeking from under the meager shelter of the bus stop, her soccer ball in hand, Karin stared. She could make out the soft outline of his small but inimitable shadow.

He claims he's not an elementary school kid, but he still acts like one, she mused. Tenacious. Naïve. Maybe it's a contagious condition with shinigami, like Ichi-nii.

Water sprayed from nearby puddles, barely missing her, as the bus screeched to a halt. She pulled her eyes away from his silhouette as she absentmindedly stuck her hands into her pockets to pull out spare change.

"Wasn't that a great game?"

"Yeah, if you made that last shot. What was up with that?"

The droning laughter and chatter of her friends echoed in her mind as her eyes wandered back to the young captain. She could barely see him now through the sheets of pouring rain.

As the bus jolted forward, Karin sprung to her feet.

"Wait! Stop!" She shouted at the bus driver, causing eyes to divert to her. She ran across the aisle and faced the bus driver.

"Can you wait just a moment? I'll be right back," she pleaded hastily.

"Huh? Wait—"

But she was already down the stairs, soaking her sneakers from the splash of a muddy puddle. The rain consumed her clothes and hair ravenously as his figure grew clearer.

"Kurosaki Karin... what are you doing here?" His eyes perked in amazement. If she was wearing a jacket, she would have given it to him. But it only made the water on her bare arms all the colder. After all, the forecast hadn't predicted a capricious, violent shower.

"Come on, you're going to catch a cold."

"I can take care of myself," he replied bluntly. Karin could have sworn that his eyebrow twitched.

"Maybe as a death god captain, but human bodies work differently, you know." The roaring of the bus engine urged her impatience. "Come on, I'll pay your bus fare." She was desperate. "You can have dinner with my family." After all, she owed him. If it wasn't for him, she would have had to bow to those narcissist, fouling high schoolers. Not to mention she'd be hollow chow.

She offered her hand.

He took it.

His hands are so warm...

-xxx-

That was the last time she ever saw him.

The chirp of a bird broke her sleep. She rubbed her eyes and glanced at her slumbering sister next to her. Her brother's fresh white sheets were empty.

Ichi-nii's gone... again.

A fresh wound opened in her heart again, devouring her good mood like a void. She ached for his silent strength, his iron presence. She could always rely on him, whether it was a soccer game or math homework. Last year, he had been present at every game. It was no surprise, since he was the one who had first taught her the game that she had grown to love, seemingly out of guilt. She glanced at the framed photo on his desk. It showed a smiling Karin, beaming at the shiny championship trophy in her hands. Yuzu was hugging her and her father was patting her hair, which she remembered irritated her to no end.

Ichi-nii was the one who took the picture, she recalled. Still, there were two gaping open spaces in the photo: for her brother and mother.

I'm not going to cry, she persuaded herself. There was no use in shedding tears. She could do nothing for her brother now except believe in him. Keep an anchor for staying alive.

The day passed like any other. School, friends, soccer... she could only keep her body and mind pre-occupied. She knew her priorities paled compared to her brother's, but what choice did she have? She kept the family together as best as she could, feigning levity at the dinner table, ignoring the empty seat next to her. She comforted Yuzu, helped with chores.

She gazed at the sunset. The days were getting shorter. Summer was ending, and she was a little late. A wave of defeat inundated her.

The same road. The same metal railing.

But the blue-eyed shinigami was gone. Vanished without a trace.

They probably returned to Soul Society, she realized. It was going to happen one day, after all. Ichi-nii, you're so lucky.

She took her time to saunter home. She ignored the bus that zoomed past. Became invisible to the calls of her friends. Had that elementary school kid ever save her from that reality-defying monster? Shared a soccer game victory with him? Had she ever seen an orange-haired teenager run around in a black kimono wielding an oversize katana like some overrated action movie? Maybe it was all a dream. An illusion. A figment of her imagination created to desperately escape from her loneliness.

Suddenly, the world didn't seem so clear anymore.

Yet, every time she passed the metal railing overseeing Karakura, it became habit to stare out and search for a silhouette of a white-haired captain, intensely staring at something she couldn't see.

But there was nothing. Time after time, and time again. Only the same rusted metal railing. The same paved concrete path. But the world was moving. The clouds were always a flurry of activity, pushed and pulled by invisible forces. So was Karakura Town, its outline was constantly transforming and growing.

Karin was waiting for some trace of the white-haired shinigami, but the earth kept spinning. The world never waited.

One day, through sheets of pouring rain, stood a distant figure. The silhouette was sitting on the railing, his hand clutching the cell phone. It was shady and dark, and disappeared altogether. Perhaps it was a trick of the light or of her own desires. Or perhaps not. Either way, Karin would never really know.

As the bus swerved across the bend, she folded her hands in her lap and smiled. Perhaps fate had something more in store for them, but for now, it was time to move on.

-xOwarix-