Disclaimer: Power Rangers Jungle Fury, and all names, images, likenesses, yada, yada, yada belong to Disney. I am not making a profit by writing this.

Going Once, Going Twice, Sold

Casey and Dominic were sweating bullets. They both looked as white as sheets. The two exchanged 'What have we got ourselves into?' looks.

"You know, we don't have to do this. We can always make a run for it. They won't know. We're standing behind a curtain after all," the rhino ranger suggested.

"Yeah, but I promised Lily, and you promised Fran, remember?" the red ranger replied.

"Well that was before we even knew what it was we were getting ourselves into. Now that I do know, I want nothing to do with it!"

"Look, I don't want to do this either, but just remember: It's for a good cause; it's Jungle Karma Pizza's first official fund raiser."

The red curtain rose revealing the two, who were on a stage-like area. It wasn't exactly a stage. The fund raiser was taking place in Jungle Karma Pizza after all, and JKP didn't have a stage. Hence, a stage-like area.

As soon as the two rangers saw they were standing in front of a packed house, Casey pushed Dominic in between his shoulder blades, nudging him forward.

"You first," the tiger stated.

The rhino ranger grabbed the red ranger by the wrist and jerked him forward so that he was in the forefront.

"No, you go first!" Dominic exclaimed.

Casey spun around on his heels and all but had steam coming out of his ears. He couldn't believe Dominic was doing this to him. All of a sudden, a light bulb went off in his head.

"Your shoelace is untied," the red ranger said.

The rhino ranger dropped down to one knee in order to tie his shoelace only to realize that it wasn't untied at all. Casey milked this opportunity for all it was worth and bolted off the stage-like area leaving Dominic behind.

"Introducing first, Jungle Karma Pizza's newest employee, Dominic," Theo announced speaking into a microphone, which he could in fact do because it wasn't like he was singing karaoke or anything.

The rhino ranger felt countless pairs of eyes on him, looking him up and down, giving him a good once over. So many people in the audience were checking him out that it made him feel…violated.

"Let's start the bidding at twenty dollars," the jaguar stated.

"Twenty dollars!" Fran shouted as her hand shot up into the air.

"Twenty-five dollars!" a ditzy blonde girl bid.

"Thirty dollars!" an eighty-something year old grandma bid.

"Thirty-five dollars!" a twenty-something year old gay guy bid.

"Forty dollars!" a middle-aged redhead woman bid.

"Fifty dollars!" Fran bid.

"Sixty dollars!" a twenty-something year old brunette woman bid.

"Seventy-five dollars!" the grandma bid.

"Eighty dollars!" the gay guy bid.

"One hundred dollars!" a thirty-something year old black woman bid.

"One hundred and one dollars!" the ditzy blonde bid.

"One hundred and twenty-five dollars!" the redhead bid.

"One hundred and fifty dollars!" Fran yelled.

"One hundred and sixty dollars!" the brunette bid.

"Two hundred dollars!" the grandma bid.

"Two hundred and one dollars!" the ditzy blonde bid.

"Two hundred and twenty dollars!" the gay guy bid.

"Two hundred and fifty dollars!" Fran hollered.

"Two hundred and sixty dollars!" the black woman bid.

Fran turned to Lily out of desperation. She only had two hundred and fifty dollars cash on her at the moment. Unfortunately, this fund raiser didn't accept credit cards.

"Psst, Lily. Could you spot me some money?" Fran whispered.

"What? No way! Then I won't be able to buy Casey!" Lily exclaimed.

"Two hundred and sixty dollars going once," Theo stated.

"Two hundred and sixty-one dollars!" the ditzy blonde bid.

"Three hundred dollars!" the gay guy bid.

Dominic's face paled further, if that was even possible, when the crowd was silent and no other bids were being made. He didn't want to be some gay guy's—prize—for the night. The mere thought of that sent chills down his spine…and not in a good way.

"Psst, RJ! Can I borrow some money? Pretty please?" Fran whispered.

"Three hundred dollars going once," the jaguar announced.

RJ heaved a deep sigh before pulling a Benjamin out of his wallet and handing it to Fran. He always had a soft spot for the girl. Try as he might, he just couldn't say 'no' to her.

"Three hundred and fifty dollars!" Fran screamed proudly.

Everyone in attendance saw the rhino ranger mouth the words 'thank you' to Fran after she had made her bid. Truth be told, Dominic wanted Fran to be the one to win him. Now that he was living at the loft with the other rangers, he had to say bye to Fran each night because while he lived at the loft, she didn't. That majorly sucked.

"Three hundred and fifty dollars going once," Theo stated.

Fran's eyes roamed the crowd looking to see if anyone was digging in their purse (or wallet as the case may be) for money. She carefully examined every single audience member's lips to see if they were about to form any words, but nothing.

"Three hundred and fifty dollars going twice," the blue ranger declared.

The only sound that could be heard was that of crickets chirping because someone had carelessly left the front door to Jungle Karma Pizza open.

"Sold for three hundred and fifty dollars!" Theo said pointing to Fran.

The eyeglass-wearing Jungle Karma Pizza employee rushed up to the stage-like area (which in actuality was just a roped off section of the pizza parlor). Dominic grabbed her around the waist, hoisted her into the air, and swung her around in two complete circles before gently setting her down.

The rhino ranger then showed his appreciation by wrapping his arms around Fran in a hug. He was so happy that the gay guy didn't end up with him, that he was a little too enthusiastic with his hugging, and had somewhat of a bear hug on Fran.

"Dom! I can't…breathe," Fran commented.

"Oops! Sorry!" Dominic said as he let go of her.

Theo joined RJ and Lily in the audience looking incredibly worried. He was scanning his surroundings for something, but whatever it was he was looking for, the blue ranger didn't find it.

"What are you looking for?" Lily asked.

"Has anyone seen Casey?" Theo inquired.

PRJF-PRJF-PRJF

Casey had walked the entire length of the loft from the loft's entrance to the hole in the wall that was the loft's exit when duty called twenty-three times; not that Casey was counting or anything.

He mustered up the courage to go to the stage-like area and fulfill his promise to Lily only to turn around and head for one of the vine covered walls ready to get the heck out of dodge. This process repeated itself over and over.

That is until RJ and Theo entered the loft. The instant Casey saw them, he knew why they were there, and he made a beeline once more for one of the vine covered walls. Theo gave chase while RJ spotted something he could use to stop the red ranger.

Casey had a hold of a vine, and was in mid-swing when RJ tossed Theo one of his Jungle Fans that he uses for weapons practice.

"Theo, catch!" RJ called out.

The blue ranger caught it and immediately threw it at the vine Casey was trying to use as his escape. It sliced right through it like a hot knife through butter, and the tiger landed unceremoniously on the hardwood floor butt first.

"Where do you think you're going?" Theo asked.

"Ouch! Nowhere now! I think I broke my tailbone!" Casey answered as he was about to rub his sore butt only to stop and think better of it.

"Whoa! What's with your negative energy?" RJ asked taking a stance almost reminiscent of Captain Jack Sparrow.

The red ranger merely scoffed in reply.

"You promised Lily you would do this," Theo reminded.

"Yeah, that's because I foolishly thought the fund raiser was more traditional. You know, like a bake sale or a car wash. That I wouldn't mind participating in, but this—this is humiliating! I'm not a piece of meat for strangers to drool over!" the red ranger countered.

"Too bad! Get over yourself because Dom's already been sold, and the crowd's waiting," the blue ranger replied.

"Oh yeah? Well, why don't you go out there and get auctioned off then blue boy?" Casey asked.

Theo cringed a little when he heard Casey use an under the influence (of Porcupongo's quill, not alcohol) Lily's nickname for Theo.

"I can't be auctioned off. I'm the co-host!" the blue ranger answered.

"Same here!" RJ piped in.

"Well you can't auction me off either. Thanks to you two, I think I'm crippled, and you can't auction the crippled!" Casey retorted.

RJ made his way over to Casey with a speed more like a cheetah than a wolf, and hit the red ranger in the neck with one well-placed karate chop, knocking him unconscious for the time being.

"Want to bet?" RJ asked.

PRJF-PRJF-PRJF

Now RJ was the one wielding a microphone. It took some effort, but with Theo's help, he and Theo managed to carry Casey to the stage-like area where they tied him up in a chair using some rope. He was still unconscious as his drooping head indicated.

The crowd was murmuring amongst themselves. RJ and Theo couldn't quite make out what was being said amidst all the ruckus, but they heard some words every now and again like "rope" and "him" and so they assumed they were wondering why Casey was unconscious and tied up.

"Last but not least, Jungle Karma Pizza's very own, Casey," the wolf ranger announced.

Lily suddenly perked up. She already had all the cash she had on her at the ready. Fran got her man, and now it was time Lily got hers.

"Shall we start the bidding at twenty dollars?" RJ asked the crowd.

"Twenty dollars!" bid the gay guy.

"Fifty dollars!" said a teeny bopper with pigtails and braces.

"Fifty-one dollars!" the ditzy blonde bid.

"One hundred dollars!" the grandma bid.

"One hundred and one dollars!" the ditzy blonde bid.

"One hundred and fifty dollars!" the middle aged woman bid.

"One hundred and fifty-one dollars!" the ditzy blonde bid.

"Two hundred dollars!" Lily shouted excitedly.

"Two hundred and one dollars!" the ditzy blonde bid because for some reason or another, she apparently had an obsession with outbidding people by one dollar.

Lily turned to Fran due to her not having any more cash on her. Fran could see the desperation in the yellow ranger's eyes.

"Please tell me that you have some more cash on you, Fran," the cheetah said.

"Sorry, Lil. I used all my money to bid on Dominic," Fran responded.

"Stupid ATM machines! They only let me take out two hundred dollars at a time!"

"Two hundred and fifty dollars!" the black woman bid.

"Three hundred dollars!" the gay guy bid.

Lily turned to the only other person she knew in the audience (besides Fran and Dominic), Theo. Surely her best friend would lend a helping hand, right? Granted, it is kind of weird that she's going to Theo for help in buying Casey. Doesn't that kind of mean that in a way Theo is…on second thought, let's not finish that train of thought.

"Psst Theo. Can I borrow some money?" Lily whispered.

"Lily! You should have prepared for this beforehand!" Theo remarked.

"It's not my fault! It's the ATM's fault! I can only take out so much, you know!"

"Fine," the blue ranger reluctantly said handing Lily a Benjamin.

Lily took the bill, and then spotted one of the tips that she forgot to pick up on a nearby table. It wasn't a Benjamin, but it would do.

"Three hundred and one dollars!" the yellow ranger shouted.

"Three hundred and one dollars going once," RJ said.

Dominic smirked. It looked like he would go for more than Casey after all. Not that it was a competition or anything.

"Three hundred and one dollars going twice," the wolf ranger stated.

Lily was practically jumping out of her skin in anticipation. She had both of her fingers crossed (because Casey's superstitious beliefs were starting to rub off on her).

"Sold for three hundred and one dollars!" RJ announced.

Everyone else (that bid anyways) let out a collective "Aww!" Not the kind of 'Aww!' people say when something is cute, but the kind of 'Aww!' people say because they lost.

Lily made a mad dash for the stage-like area to claim her prize. She hurriedly untied the rope that was binding Casey to the chair. She thought she would keep the rope because it might still be of some use later in the night. What she didn't take into account though was that the tiger was still unconscious. When Lily finished untying him, he face planted onto the floor of the stage-like area.

That managed to bring the red ranger back to his senses however. He cracked his eyes open. Casey realized that he was lying on his back on the floor somewhere. Lily was cradling his head in her lap and had a very bizarre look on her face.

"Huh? Where am I? What's going on? Why is my face and neck sore?" the red ranger asked as he rubbed his face and neck.

"You're at JKP," Lily answered.

"Is the auction over?"

"Yep."

"Great, who ended up buying me?"

"I did!"

"Thank God!"

RJ was counting through the cash he had made courtesy of the fund raiser to make sure it was all there.

"Well, I'd say tonight was a success. JKP made a total of six hundred and fifty-one dollars. Plus, with the one hundred dollars Fran borrowed from me, that totals seven hundred and fifty-one dollars. We should do it again next week," RJ stated.

"No!" Dominic and Casey shouted simultaneously.

RJ, Fran, Theo, and Lily broke out in laughter, but Casey and Dominic were anything but amused. They didn't see anything funny about having to do this all over again next week.

The End

A/N: This was one of those can't-sleep-at-night-so-get-up-and-write-instead fics, so if it sucks, my sincerest apologies. It's early in the morning. I haven't been able to get a wink of sleep so far, and yeah.