Pre-notes: Hello and welcome to...The Guide to Villains! This book has been purchased by:

Uzumaki Naruto

Please read the steps below and follow the instructions, just in case you meet Villains. Thanks you.

Art is a Bang XD

How to Identify Villains

Ggiant flappy black cloaks with red clouds --That's usually the signal to run away as fast as possible

Purple belts

If they're pedophiles

If they have a bad sense of fashion

If they have the Sharingan/are an Uchiha. Remember, all Uchiha's, Sasuke included, are EVIL!

Generally if they look creepy (Shino excluded)

What to do if there are Villains

Run away as fast as possible

If unable to run, or frozen with fear, dump water on them, then run away as fast as possible

If faced with a snake pedophile, bribe him with something about little kids, preferably someone from another side. E.g. Itachi (that would really come in handy)

If faced with puppets, fight with the help of women.

If faced with bombers or pyromaniacs, chop of their arms first.

If faced with immortals, use your brain. That's why it's there.

If faced with money-lovers, bribe them with money.

If faced with sharks, summon giant frogs. Why? Because frogs eat sharks...right?

If faced with Sharingan users, counter with Byakugan users (hopefully someone you know).

If faced with plants, attempt to burn them, but actually don't, because they'll kill you. Really.

If faced with 'good boys', attempt to start a conversation that will not involve your death.

If faced with origami-users, dump water on them, then run away as fast as possible (as repeated in step 2)

If faced with the Rinnegan...JUST RUN LIKE HELL!

If a random villain pops up, dump water on them, then run away as fast as possible. (as repeated in steps 2 and 12)

What to do if you're captured by Villains

Attempt to fight your way out, although don't expect it to work because it never does.

Attempt to talk your way out, although that never works either

Bribe your way out. Only works with the greediest villains, Kakuzu included.

Threaten your way out. Warning: Will not be very effective.

Plead your way out. Will. Never. Work (unless faced with Sasuke/Itachi).

Volunteer to give something back in return.

If all else fails, cry.

A/N: Well, wasn't that nice? Short stories are going to be comming soon concerning Naruto and his villains, so watch for them :D

Please review, it makes the 'short stories' longer XD

Have a nice day