"Jealous Little Engines, Stories of the Narrow Gauge"

Dear friends,

Why should the big engines on the North Western Railway have all the fun? Here are four little stories of life on the Skarloey railway. Just on the standard gauge railway, the little engines are expecting fresh new engines to joining their esteemed family. Duncan takes a special liking to one new engine while Fearless Freddie meets a supposedly long lost friend. It's a history making event with the arrival of the most unusual engine to ever be seen on the Island by… any one. And finally, a tale of courage and fortitude that will make your metaphorical axles quiver. This may be the first Volume based on the narrow gauge railway, but it won't certainly be the last. \m/\m/ - Ozzie Bastard.

Chapter One: Duncan the Love Struck Engine

The narrow gauge engines of the Skarloey railway were working hard like they had never before. Just like their standard gauge counterparts on the North Western Railway, they were busy with increased workloads and the escalation of the tourist population. The engines enjoyed their work immensely, it made them feel needed and, indeed, useful. Yet, the engines were constantly overworked; they often had no time to rest in between work commitments and often the work started to pile up, which meant delays to freight and passenger services. One cheerful day, the Thin Controller, Mr. Percival, called every narrow gauge engine to the yards for a short meeting, all twelve of them. He was looking very smart in his new Armani suit and chic new glasses. The engines were impressed by his swanky new look. Mr. Percival brought everyone to attention and started the meeting. "Thank you all for coming, my dear engines." He called to them. "This shouldn't take long. Uh, where's Ivo Hugh?" He looked around.

"Coming, sir." A voice rang out. In steamed Ivo Hugh, the newest member of the narrow gauge team. The engines watched as he screeched to a halt in the yards. He was out of breath. "Sorry, I'm late, sir. I was caught up with a stray dog on the line. It was a big one, sir."

"No biggie, Ivo. Just take a seat." Mr. Percival laughed. Ivo Hugh looked confused. "Ok, first of all. I want to congratulate you all on performing such a brilliant job, despite the mitigating circumstances. The railways never run better." Mr. Percival applauded, as did every crewman and every fitter in the yard. The engines tooted in recognition. They were so pleased with themselves.

"However, with the increased workloads and the rise of the tourist industry here, the work here is getting a little too much for you engines." The engines murmured in agreement.

"So, after much thought and decisive planning." Mr. Percival smiled and straightened his tie. "I've decided that new engines will be joining the fold on our humble little railway. In fact, one new engine will be arriving soon today." The engines chattered amongst themselves in amazement. Duncan merely rolled his eyes.

"Quiet please, everyone. Quiet." Mr. Percival shushed the crowd. "Now this new engine will be the first in a long line of arrivals to the Skarloey Railway, so I want you all to make this engine as comfortable and welcome as you do with each other. Duncan, I'm counting on you too." He glanced over to the pessimistic bronze yellow Douglas class engine.

"As you wish, sir." Duncan sighed.

"Very good. Meeting adjourned." Mr. Percival then hopped on his new mountain bike and pedaled away to his office. The engines were chatting amongst themselves. They were excited at the prospect of new arrivals to the Skarloey Railway. They wondered what the new engines would be like, particularly the newest one arriving soon. But as always, Duncan was very unenthusiastic. He thought the idea of new engines on the railway was ridiculous and a complete waste of time.

"New engines. Pah!" Duncan snorted. "We are doing quite fine without the need of other engines. It's a waste of resources and space."

"What's wrong with having new engines?" Skarloey retorted. "I think it is a marvelous idea. The work is getting too much for us and we need all the help we can get. Besides, more engines mean more friends." He smiled and the others agreed whole heartedly.

"PAH!" Duncan snorted again. "We don't need more engines. We already have the show-off warhorse, the constantly late newbie and the old codger."

"HEY!" Duke thundered. "Compared to the next engine, I'm pretty young for my age."

"Provided if the next engine is the Rocket." Duncan laughed. Duke seethed with anger, his face turned a violent shade of red.

"Calm down, everyone." Skarloey intervened before things got ugly. "The new engine is arriving this very day, so there is to be none of these pissing contests. Duncan, you must be on your best behaviour. I'm counting on you." Skarloey then steamed away to the slate works.

"I'll show you best behaviour." Duncan muttered under his breath as he steamed along behind him. At the incline railway, the little engines were working their valves and pistons to the bone, I mean, steel. Skarloey, Rheneas and Rusty were busy taking trucks full of slate to and from the transfer yards at Crovan's Gate. Duncan was acting even more rude and insolent than ever, forcing the engines to work faster. He was very impatient and arrogantly showed off his rocking and rolling skills. "Rock and roll is meant for rock stars and metal gods, not for steam engines." Rusty huffed to the Douglas class engine.

"Oh, but I am a rock star." Duncan cried with arrogance. "Didn't you hear me singing to Linkin Park earlier? I was singing up a storm." Rusty wasn't impressed.

"You're about as tone deaf as Jessica Simpson and twice as air-brained." Rusty grunted.

"You're just jealous that I can sing and you can't." Duncan acted smugly.

"Jealous? That's rich." Rusty sighed exasperatedly. "Just don't embarrass us with your "singing prowess" when the new engine arrives. You don't want to give the railway a bad reputation of having bad singers and disobedient engines." He laughed.

"Preferably not the same engine." Skarloey added.

"Don't you worry your feeble little funnels, lads." Duncan smirked. "I'll practice my arse before the newbie arrives. Perhaps he would appreciate art." He finished and started singing One Step Closer loudly… very, very, very badly. The engines cringed as Duncan steamed away singing his horrible cacophony. Then, a thought suddenly crept into Skarloey's funnel.

"He?" Skarloey wondered. Rusty metaphorically shrugged and rattled back to work. Eventually, news had arrived that the new engine was arriving that very afternoon. All the engines were more excited then ever, working like the wind so they didn't its arrival to the Skarloey railway. As time came for the engine's arrival, all the narrow gauge engines were gathered in the yard, ready to greet the newbie to the family. Ivo Hugh was, of course, nowhere in sight which angered Mr. Percival to no end. Anticipation lingered in the air as the engines waited patiently, everyone thinking about what type of engine would be joining their ranks. Skarloey and Rheneas hoped that the engine was like them. Hard working, smart and hoping that it would resemble either one of them. Rusty hoped it was another diesel. Even though there was the recent addition of Fred to the railway, Rusty never really got along with Fred. Rusty hoped against hope that the possible "diesel" would be friendlier than Fred. Duncan thought that the new engine would be a guy and, as hope intended, a connoisseur of fine music. Fearless Freddie wondered if the new engine would be from his old railway of the Welsh Highland Railway. He hadn't seen any of his friends there since he was overhauled and shipped to Sodor years ago. He missed them all. Duke and Bertram wondered if the new engine would be like an old warhorse like them. Sir Handel and Peter Sam prayed to God that it wasn't Stanley, a.k.a. Smudger. They hadn't seen him in decades before he was turned into a pumping engine back at the Cas-ny-Hawin mines. That was back in the old days of the Mid Sodor Railway. "Let's hope that he wasn't brought back from the dead." Peter Sam peeped anxiously.

"I agree." Sir Handel gulped. Mighty Mac thought that maybe the engine would be a Double Fairlie engine like him. No one knew what the new engine was, they were never told about the engines make, model or… gender. So whatever engine that arrived would be a surprise worth waiting. At last, Ivo Hugh steamed in very late. "My apologies again, sir." Ivo Hugh panted heavily. "Let me guess, another stray dog on the line?" Mr. Percival grunted angrily.

"No, it was that damn "Whirly-Bird" Harold the bloody helicopter!" Ivo Hugh fumed. "He made a forced landing on my line and delayed my-"

"Just take a seat." Mr. Percival cut off the fuming engine. Just then, a dark little toot was heard in the distance. "It's here! It's here!" Rheneas cried. "The new engine is here!" The engines held their breath as they heard an engine approaching the transfer yards. It was Karen the Goth engine hauling Rocky the crane and a long flatbed truck with the new engine. Duncan sneered at Karen as she slowly steamed by. "Still practicing witchcraft, are you?" Duncan cried.

"Eat me, dickbrain!" Karen snapped back. As Karen steamed to a stop, the little engines finally saw the newest arrival to the Skarloey railway. The engine was beautiful, it was a Peckett and Sons 0-4-2T Tank engine. With shiny dark green and red paintwork and a gleaming smile to match. The little engines were astonished. The engine was nothing like they had imagined. The engine beamed proudly as it sat on the flatbed, looking over the sea of amazed looks and stares. "Hello there everyone." The engine called out. "My names Rachel." She smiled brightly. The other engines then smiled and greeted the newbie. Peter Sam and Sir Handel breathed a sigh of relief. They certainly glad that it wasn't Stanley. Fearless Freddie was a little disappointed that it wasn't one of his old comrades. Maybe next time, he thought to himself. The engines were very impressed with the newbie. "A female engine?" Duke said to Bertram. "That's… that's different." He grinned.

"Could be worse." Bertram laughed. "We could have another Duncan on our hands." He chuckled again.

"Let's hope that isn't the case." Said Duke. Rocky carefully lifted Rachel off the flatbed and onto the tracks. "Careful you don't drop me." Rachel called to Rocky.

"No worries, hun." Rocky laughed. "I've lifted bigger engines than you before; this is bloody easy compared to the others." He boasted. Eventually, Rachel was safely on the rails. Her crew helped to unhook her from Rocky's heavy gauge chains and Karen, with a farewell toot, steamed off back to Knapford.

"Thanks again." Rachel called out.

"No sweat." Karen called back from the distance. Rachel then turned her attention to her new coworkers. They were more than happy to make her acquaintance. "It is very nice to meet you." Skarloey spoke up. "I'm Skarloey and this happy little chap here is Rheneas."

"Hi." Rheneas peeped happily.

"I am Duke." Duke said grandly. "Welcome to our railway, my lady." He tried to bow to her, but he couldn't. He would have kissed her hand too, if she had hands.

"I'm Bertram." The old George England-type 0-4-0 introduced himself. "It's a great pleasure to have you on our illustrious little railway."

"Rusty is the name." The little diesel smiled. "I'll be your maintenance diesel for your, ahem, permanent stay." He acted smugly.

"I'm Fred." The second diesel spoke in line. "Also a newbie to this place."

"I'm Sir Handel and this is my heterosexual life partner, Peter Sam." Sir Handel smiled.

"It's very nice to… heterosexual life partner?" Peter Sam chuffed in disbelief.

"Very nice to meet you." Rachel smiled.

"Fearless Freddie's the name." Freddie grinned. "Being fast and fearless is me game." He laughed proudly.

"No kidding?" Rachel was surprised. "I've heard stories about you, but I never really believed them at first."

"Glad that someone else knows about me by reputation." Fearless Freddie blushed.

"And you are?" Rachel looked over to Ivo Hugh.

"Hugh. Ivo Hugh." The late arrival chuffed like James Bond. The others rolled their eyes.

"I'm Mighty." Mighty smiled to Rachel.

"And I'm Mac!" Mac added. "And together we make Mighty Mac."

"Wow, a Double Fairlie." Rachel smiled. "We don't see many of those anymore."

"Sadly, we don't." Mighty Mac reluctantly agreed. Rachel looked over to Duncan; he was still very much stunned and uncannily silent.

"Oh and I didn't catch your name." Rachel said to Duncan. Duncan didn't answer, he was speechless. His mouth hung open like a dirty old man. This made Rachel a little uneasy. "That's Duncan." Rheneas peeped in. "He's usually more vocal than this, surprisingly."

"I see." Rachel raised an eyebrow. "Well, it's nice to meet you too." She called to Duncan who was still eerily silent. Not that the engines minded one bit. Mr. Percival greeted the new engine and her crew. "Welcome to the Skarloey Railway." He announced. "I'm Mr. Percival, the, uh, Thin Controller and CEO of this rail network. If there's anything that is bothering you or you need help with anything, don't hesitate to ask me or any of your new colleagues here. We're a family here and as a family, we look out for each other."

"You honour me, good sir." Rachel chuffed brightly.

"Good sir, she says." Mr. Percival muttered to himself. "And such nice manners." He cleared his throat and spoke to his engines. "Uh, Rheneas. Why don't you escort Rachel to her new shed?"

"Certainly, sir." Said Rheneas proudly. "I'd be delighted."

"We'll all escort her." Freddie added. "Perhaps she can regale us with stories from her life." he added.

"Sounds cool to me." Rachel smiled and she and the cavalcade of engines steamed away to her new home. Duncan was still frozen with amazement. He watched as his friends steamed away into the distance. Mr. Percival was concerned that Duncan hadn't said a word or even moved a cylinder. "Are you alright, Duncan?" he asked. Duncan's face finally unfroze and he formed a captivated smile. "My God, she is beautiful." Duncan puffed to himself.

At her new home, Rachel told the engines stories from her long history. She recounted tales from her many years working along different narrow gauge railways. Rachel told of her time when she was part of the Ffestiniog Railway, working along such great engines like Mountaineer, the Double Fairlie legend David Lloyd George and Taliesin. Rachel then told the engines about her short time at the Welsh Highland Railway. She mentioned that she was Fearless Freddie's replacement when he was shipped to Sodor. The other engines told great stories about him to her, which as she stated found hard to believe. Rachel told of her time on the Talyllyn and Corris Railways. Sir Handel and Peter Sam mentioned that they had visited the Talyllyn Railway, each at different eras though. Rachel recounted a tale about a Douglas class engine that took a dislike to her. The engine was a pure misogynist and he believed that female engines were the weaker sex and that they didn't belong in a male oriented railway. One day, the engine was pulling a very long passenger train when it suddenly became stranded in between Dolgoch and Brynglas station. The engine broke down when one of its crank pins snapped. Rachel told about how she rescued the stricken engine by pulling the train the rest of the way to the final stop at Tywyn Wharf. She was declared a hero and the misogynist engine… changed its tune very quickly. The little engines loved listening to Rachel's stories but soon became time to say goodnight. The little engines tooted their newest arrival a hearty "goodnight" and steamed off to their sheds. All was peaceful as the engines slept and dreamed their little dreams. The only exception to this was Duncan. He couldn't sleep. He was mesmerized by the incredible beauty that was Rachel. His was almost love-struck. Although Duncan didn't really want to admit it to himself or the others.

The next morning, the little engines were up bright and early. Rachel was eager to show the engines what she was made of and all the engines wanted to see Rachel in action. Rachel's first assignment was to shunt slate trucks at the incline railway along with Skarloey, Rusty and Rheneas. She was still learning the routes around the Skarloey railway. Can't risk getting lost on my first day. Rachel thought to herself. "Should we pull over and ask for directions?" her driver chuckled.

"I think we can manage on our own." Rachel puffed. Just then, Duncan screeched to a halt beside her. He wasn't looking too worse for wear from his sleepless night.

"Hello there." Duncan greeted Rachel cheerfully.

"Hello. Duncan, is it?" Rachel sheepishly asked.

"That's right, lassie." Duncan smiled. "Where are you heading to on this fine day?"

"The Slate works." Rachel answered. "Only I don't know where it is." She whispered to Duncan.

"What a coincidence. I'm just heading to the Slate works myself." Duncan smiled. "Just follow my lead and I'll take you there." Rachel was very relieved.

"Thank you so much." Rachel whished. "You're a lifesaver." She smiled and followed Duncan's lead to the Slate works. In reality, Duncan wasn't heading to the Slate works that day; he had to take some coal to the station waiting rooms. He didn't want Rachel to be late for her first day, he decided to help. Coal trucks can bloody well wait, Duncan thought. Helping the newbie out is much more rewarding. At the incline railway, Rachel carefully shunted her trucks smoothly at the base of the incline railway. The other engines were impressed with her smoothness and commitment. Duncan stayed to watch, he had completely forgotten about the coal trucks, much to the chagrin of his driver. Rachel carefully shunted her trucks full of slate for Rusty to collect; all the while she was singing the beautiful little tune Independent Slaves. "She's very good." Rheneas made an observation as he shunted his trucks into position.

"I agree, my brother." Skarloey concurred. "Such smoothness and precision. Those are the qualities you want in an engine."

"Don't I know it." Duncan chimed in as he shunted trucks in an effort to fit in.

"Uh, pardon me for asking, but don't you have other jobs to take care of?" Skarloey wondered.

"Bugger them." Duncan huffed. "This is more interesting than some silly coal trucks any day." Skarloey and Rheneas were perplexed. Was this the same Duncan that took Rock and Roll to dangerous levels… or some other Duncan from a parallel world?

"But you never liked working here." Rheneas pointed out. "What's changed?"

"Come on, fellas." Rachel called out. "Collect your load and scoot off with you. We're on a schedule here." Rheneas quickly collected his six loaded slate trucks and steamed away. Rachel shunted six more trucks in place. She glanced over to Duncan with a big smile on her face. "I owe you one, big guy." Rachel winked to Duncan. He beamed brightly.

"DUNCAN!" an angry voice called out.

"Snap my buffers, snap my boiler." Duncan shuddered. It was Mr. Percival; he was red in the face and very mad.

"What in God's name are you doing here? The station masters are complaining that you haven't delivered your coal yet! Get to it immediately." Mr. Percival thundered.

"Sorry, sir." Duncan said meekly. He steamed away with his tail between his wheels. Rachel felt sympathetic; she didn't want to see Duncan being disciplined like that. "Sir, it was my fault, I'm afraid." She admitted.

"I got lost along the way to the Slate works. Duncan was kind enough to show me the way and I asked him to stay to help me and the others." Rachel whished.

"I see." Said Mr. Percival, thinking this over. "Well, I supposed getting lost is understandable, being the new engine and all. But to take another engine away from his assigned duties is something I find hard to believe."

"I know, sir." Puffed Rachel. "But we did get the job done quicker." Mr. Percival pondered for a moment.

"Well, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt, this time." He grinned.

"Thank you, sir." Rachel sighed. Mr. Percival cycled away back to his office and Rachel with a deep sigh steamed back to work. Later, Rachel had her first passenger train on the Island. It was a short run from Glennock to Cros-ny-Cuirn; the Thin Controller didn't want to risk overloading Rachel on her first day. Besides, he wanted to see if she performed well on coaches just as she did on trucks. Rachel took things easy when it came to passenger services. She always ran her services quickly, but she always made sure to run smoothly so as not to bump the passengers around. At Cros-ny-Cuirn, Rachel glided into the station, right on time. The passengers praised her for being so smooth and reliable. As Rachel basked in everyone's good graces, she heard a familiar whistle. It was Duncan pulling in some workmen. The workmen were installing new satellite dishes into each station so as to monitor the trains coming in and out of the stations. Duncan looked nervously over to Rachel. "Uh… Hello again." Duncan chuffed anxiously. Rachel was surprised and a little disconcerted.

"Hello yourself." She answered back.

"I heard you bailed me out before." Duncan puffed. "You really shouldn't have done that, but thanks." He smiled.

"Hey, it was no problem." Rachel smiled back. "Besides, I did say I owed you one."

"So, I guess that makes us even." Said Duncan.

"No quite." Rachel raised an eyebrow. "Just explain to me why you lied about going to the Slate works when you had other jobs to begin with." The passengers wanted to know too.

"Well, it was true." Duncan admitted. "I didn't want you to be late for your first day and all that. So, I lied about heading to the Slate works. I wanted to help you out so I stuck round to shunt trucks. But hey, at least the work got done faster." He broke out a nervous smile.

"So you defied your commandants set instructions just to help me out?" Rachel was in disbelief. Duncan looked away.

"I was only trying to be useful." Duncan said sadly, blushing insanely.

"There's more to being useful than just being a good friend, and you are a good friend in my book." Said Rachel. Duncan's face dropped in amazement.

"Really? You consider me a friend." He peeped.

"Yeah, I like you, Duncan. You're kind of a weird engine, but I like you." Rachel beamed proudly. Duncan's face went a nasty shade of white. He felt like he was going to faint… if only engines could faint. Just then, the station master blew his whistle. Rachel was snapped back to reality. "Oh, gotta go." She whished. "Catch you later, Duncy Boy." Rachel winked at the frozen Douglas class engine and quickly steamed away.

"And I… like you too… Rachel." Duncan said to himself. His crew looked at each other very bewilderedly. They noticed on his gauges that his boiler pressure was rising. They suddenly knew the signs. A heart shaped cloud of smoke rose from Duncan's tall funnel. He truly was love-struck.

As time went on, Rachel adjusted to life on the Skarloey Railway. She quickly found her niche amongst her experienced male peers and, by her reputation, become one of the hardest working engines on the railway. Rachel was well liked amongst her regular passengers. They all complemented her for being so smooth and efficient. But then again, it was often said that Rachel settled for nothing less than absolute perfection. You could say that she was like a miniature version of Emily, be it a lot less high and mighty. Her strides for perfection brought unwanted tension between Rachel and those she worked with and often made them competitive. Despite the odd competitive nature, the engines liked Rachel for all its worth. Skarloey believed that Rachel coming to the railway was like a breath of fresh air. Duncan liked Rachel most of all. He was often seen working along side her, helping her with whatever problem she had. Duncan showed Rachel the many beautiful sites along the Skarloey railway. The Castle ruins along the causeway, the trackside park along Woodland Way, even the old railway route at Cros-ny-Cuirn. But the most wonderful place that Duncan took Rachel was Whispering Waterfall. This was Rachel's favourite place. She believed that it was the most romantic place on the Island, as Duncan found out after a particularly hectic day. He was chugging down the line after completing an important job at Lakeside Station. Duncan was cheerfully singing Even Flow to himself (very badly, mind you) when he "ran into" Rachel sitting alone on a siding, soaking up the late afternoon rays. "Hey there, Duncy boy!" Rachel called to Duncan joyfully.

"Hello there." Duncan called back politely.

"Tough day at the office?" Rachel asked.

"Very much so. I'm bloody knackered and I could sure do with a back rub." Duncan sighed. Rachel just snickered.

"You're funny." She laughed. Duncan blushed. "If only that were humanly possible." Rachel added.

"Och, fuckin' A! If only." Duncan agreed. He checked around to see if Mr. Percival was lurking about. He couldn't handle another trip to the sheds for swearing, it was almost sending him crazy.

"Don't worry, you're cool." Rachel giggled.

"Thank God for that. I'd better head off." Duncan chuffed. "If I don't get home soon, Skarloey will take my favourite place in the shed."

"Don't leave now, Duncan." Rachel chuffed. "Sit with me and soak up the wonderful splendor of this place." Duncan shuddered.

"A-a-alright." He stammered, becoming rather hot and flustered. His driver shook his head in dismay. The two engines sat in silence as the sun crept towards the horizon. Rachel noticed a young couple sitting side by side at the waters edge. The young couple was locked in a passionate kiss. "Such a romantic place, isn't it?" Rachel chuffed softly. Duncan still acting anxious.

"Humph, I don't know about that." He sighed. Secretly, Duncan thought so too, though he didn't want to say it out loud.

"Surely you think that this place brings out the lover in everyone?" Rachel puffed. "I mean, look at those two." She looked over the young couple.

"Me personally, I believe that any place can bring out the lover in anyone." Duncan sniffed. He didn't really think that, he was trying too hard to be romantic. His driver and fireman chuckled quietly.

"Really?" Rachel snickered. "Even at a place like the Slate Works?"

"Maybe not at the Slate Works, but you get my drift." Duncan sniffed. The two engines fell silent again. They watched the sun slipped below the horizon and the stars came out. By that time, the young lovers had left for home. Now it was just the two little engines that remained… along with their crews. Duncan wanted to speak the truth about his feelings towards Rachel but he couldn't. "Just speak from the heart." His driver whispered to him. Duncan took a deep breath and summoned up all his courage. "Uh, Rachel." Duncan started. "There's something I've to say to you."

"Yes?" Rachel peeped. Duncan felt his systems rattle and rock. He started to perspire heavily; steam and water seeped from his vital "organs".

"What is it?" Rachel wondered, noticing how strange Duncan was acting.

"I… I… I'd better be getting home now." Duncan spluttered and steamed off as fast as he could. Rachel was a little baffled by this. Despite his always outspoken, brash personality, Duncan was virtually a different engine whenever he hung around Rachel. As much as he wanted to admit his feelings towards her, Duncan couldn't find the words. He was frightened that Rachel might object to his advances towards her. She never suspected anything and neither did the other engines. "Wuss." Duncan's driver sneered at his engine.

"Bugger off." Duncan snapped; chuffing all the way home, almost deflated.

A new day came on the Island of Sodor; the engines were working another long hard shift at the Slate works. There was a large order to be filled which meant most of the engines were working the incline railway. Sure, the engines worked their hardest, shunting trucks back and forth from Crovan's Gate, but this lead to some delay. The engines worked like a tag-team of sorts. Once their slate trucks were filled, they would trundle away with their load and let the next engine in line to shunt their trucks to the incline. The engines found the traffic at the incline railway a little overwhelming, sometimes to the point of organized chaos. "Be careful you do not jam me between a rock and a hard place." Duke cried, almost being pinned down by Sir Handel.

"Hurry, hurry, hurry." Chuffed Bertram.

"Put your wheels into it, big guy." Ivo Hugh strained to pull his heavy load.

"Pull harder on the coupling rods of your master." Peter Sam growled to himself he pulled his heavy load of slate. Skarloey and Rheneas were resting on a siding, building up more steam, when Duncan showed up with his long line of empty trucks. He hadn't told the other engines about his thoughts on Rachel the new engine and the others were pressing him details. Everyone thought she was grand, but what were Duncan's thoughts? "So Duncan, how do you like the new engine?" Skarloey posed the question.

"Oh, she's OK." Duncan said bluntly.

"Ok, you say?" asked Skarloey with his eyebrow raised. "Well, I think she's just lovely. Don't you agree, Rheneas?" he looked to his coworker.

"Oh, yes indeed, my brother." Rheneas agreed. "I can't imagine why we didn't get her on this railway sooner?"

"Indeed." Skarloey smiled. "The railway's never been so cheerful. So nice to have a feminine touch here, for once."

"But she's here now and that's all that matters." Duncan was looking quite pale and anxious and was shaking in his wheelbase.

"Quite." Skarloey agreed. Then he noticed Duncan looking a little unbalanced. "What's the matter, Duncan? You don't look so good."

"Oh, nothing. Just a bad shipment of coal." Duncan tried to cover up.

"I don't think so." Rheneas puffed. "My boiler's just fine. Probably you need to get your systems checked."

"Yeah." Said Duncan, looking away. Suddenly, Skarloey put two and two together.

"Oh dear Lord, you're in love, aren't you?" Skarloey cried.

"What? NO!" snapped Duncan, turning even paler.

"Yeah, you are in love! With Rachel." Chuckled Rheneas. The little engines laughed while Duncan was getting very annoyed. Sir Handel puffed along side him.

"Duncan and Rachel, sitting in the shed." laughed Sir Handel, overhearing everything. "F-U-C-" he sang.

"Gods, buggery and fuck!" Duncan snarled, interrupting Sir Handel's little ditty.

"Duncan! Shed!" Mr. Percival snapped, pointing angrily down the line. Duncan growled and squinted angrily. He stormed away very annoyed. Skarloey and Rheneas watched Duncan steam away. They smiled wickedly at each other, now knowing the God honest truth. "You know something, Rheneas. I think he's definitely in love." Skarloey laughed.

"I think so too." Rheneas grinned widely.

"Hi fellas." Ivo Hugh steamed up. "Did I miss anything?"

"Practically everything." Skarloey chuffed and he steamed off to shunt his trucks.

"I always miss everything." Ivo Hugh muttered angrily. By the end of the day, the engines were very exhausted from their big day of hauling slate and were looking forward to a good nights rest. The engines could see that Duncan was still in his shed, very much angry from everyone's teasing. He acted very coldly to them and didn't want to speak to anyone, not even Mr. Percival. "Sssssssh. We mustn't disturb the Romeo engine." Rheneas whispered to Skarloey as they steamed into their sheds.

"Indeed." Skarloey concurred. "As my old friend Donald would say "Its tae bump uglies with Rachel, he be wantin'." He chuckled.

"Perhaps the old proverb of beauty taming the beast must be true." Duke whispered. Duncan just sneered at the others. Such childish speculation and gossip, Duncan thought. I swear I think that sometimes I'm surrounded by idiots, or children. Duncan shut his eyes and settled in for the night. He had a long boring day of solitary confinement and wasn't at all impressed with Mr. Percival's authoritarian stance on vulgar language on his railway. He almost had enough. He figured the next time this happen, Duncan would let him have it. "Hey, if things don't work out between Duncan and Rachel, do you think I would have a shot with her?" Ivo Hugh whispered to Sir Handel. Duncan's eyes shot open with disbelief.

"Who knows?" Sir Handel chuckled. "If you can lift up your game when it come your lateness problem." Duncan seethed with anger. He didn't like what the other were joking about one bit, especially when it concerned his love life… or lack there of. Duncan decided that he wanted no part of the others foolish chatter and huffed off to sleep. Bloody chatterbox engines, Duncan thought. Pah!

The following morning, Duncan was still in a foul mood. All the engines teasing about his love life had soured his disposition… even more. He refused to speak to anyone, not even Mr. Percival. The engines all tried to make up for their jokes, but try as they might, Duncan didn't respond to any of them. "Please don't be mad to us, old chap." Skarloey tried to make up to the fuming Douglas class engine. "We were only pulling your driving rod." Said Skarloey.

"Yeah." Rheneas chimed in. "We kid 'cause we love."

"Except the part about how your singing is God awful." Fred snickered.

"FRED!" the engines roared angrily at him. One driver tossed a shoe at his face. This made Duncan all the bitterer and he puffed off grumbling like mad. The other little engines gave scolding looks to Fred, which made him very nervous.

"Nice going, idiot." Skarloey sneered.

"Yeah, nice one, dick-brain." Sir Handel scowled at Fred.

"I hate you." Rusty whispered darkly. Meanwhile, Duncan had set about taking passengers for their early morning commute. Duncan didn't complain but he was still acting huffy and angry. The passengers were worried that Duncan wasn't performing with a cool head. His driver was worried too. He could sense that his engine was acting irrational and hot-headed. Duncan often rocked and rolled along the line, sometimes rather violently. It wasn't until he reached Crovan's Gate when his driver finally had enough. The passengers all grumbled as they stepped out of the train. The driver stormed out the cab to confront Duncan about his behaviour. "Alright, Duncan." he said sternly. "What the hell is going on?"

"Nothings the matter." Duncan huffed.

"Are you still mad that the others teased you?" His driver wondered.

"So what if I am?" Duncan said gruffly.

"Oh, can't you ever lighten up, Duncan?" said his driver. "They were only teasing."

"They weren't not just teasing." Duncan growled. "They're putting my love life into the bloody open. Dissecting it and making fun of it. As far as I'm concerned, all those engines are a bunch of arseholes."

"Am I an arsehole too?" a sweet voice rang out. Duncan jumped. It was Rachel, she had overheard everything.

"So I'm an arsehole, am I?" Rachel raised a playful eyebrow.

"No." Duncan gulped and turned white. "No no no, not you. I mean the others."

"Oh?" Rachel wondered.

"Yeah, they've been teasing me about… certain things." Duncan explained, skimping on some of the details.

"What sort of certain things?" Rachel pressed for further details. Duncan knew he had no other choice. The others had found out about his feelings towards Rachel and eventually, she would too. That would only lead to embarrassment and further anguish. Duncan took one deep breath and summoned up all his courage. "Well, they were teasing because… because I like you and I mean really like you." Rachel was taken aback.

"You mean… you like me as more than a friend?" Rachel wondered.

"Yeah, that's exactly it." Duncan blushed, looking away very embarrassed.

"Awwwww." The passengers on the platform chorused quietly. Rachel also blushed at this revelation. But then, she smiled.

"Yeah well, all those engines have wasted their time with their idle gossip." Rachel huffed. "Because I do like you too as more then a friend." Duncan made a double-take.

"You do?" He was genuinely surprised.

"Yeah, I do." Rachel beamed. "I'm actually glad to you brought this up. Because if you didn't, then I would have." The passengers held on to the engines every word.

"Well, it feels so bloody good to get it off my boiler." Duncan chuckled. He wasn't feeling flustered anymore.

"Bravo, my boy." Duncan's driver whispered triumphantly to his engine.

"So, what do we do now?" Rachel wondered.

"I don't know." Duncan pondered for a moment. "This has… this has never happened to me before."

"What, performance anxiety?" Rachel snickered. Everyone laughed.

"NO, I mean, I've never been able to talk to anyone in this capacity before." Duncan chuffed. "I've always been brash and open about everything but matters of the heart, I just can't do it."

"You're not the only one." Rachel smiled. "Still, what do we do now? Now the "secret" is out?" she wondered.

"Well, we could try kissing but that would be very complicated." Duncan laughed.

"AND painful." Rachel added.

"Duncan!" the unmistakable voice of Mr. Percival rang out.

"What is it? I'm kinda busy here." Duncan sighed.

"So am I." Mr. Percival stood face to face with the grumbling engine. "What with me running a railway and all that jazz. Are you too busy to bring these passengers to their destinations? The good people that help pay for the railway?"

"Yes!" Duncan said defiantly. "I'm busy here with Rachel."

"That's right." Rachel added. "We're professing our love for each other." Mr. Percival was unfazed, he just crossed his arms. Duncan and Rachel's tirade was getting the attention of just about everyone. Even Henry on the standard gauge line couldn't help but listen as the little engines stood their ground.

"Romance on the rails is one thing." Mr. Percival said sternly. "Defying orders is another. Now be a good pair of engines and get back to work."

"Arse biscuits." Snapped Duncan. Everyone recoiled in disbelief. Yet Mr. Percival remained firm. You could tell he was getting mad by the amount of steam rising from his ears.

"Duncan, you seem to keep forgetting about our little agreement about swearing." Mr. Percival spoke strongly. "Need I remind you again about our policy of-?"

"Quite frankly, I had enough of your disciplinarian actions towards swearing." Duncan huffed in disgust, giving into frustration. "If you keep sending engines to their sheds every time they say stuff like: shit, piss, fuck, c, cocksucker, motherfucker and tits, the whole railway would slow down and no work would get done."

"Why do you make my job so difficult?" groaned Duncan's driver.

"Yes, well, I don't approve of such vulgar language on my railway." Mr. Percival was getting madder and madder. "Maybe if you worked on the Other Railway, you'd get away with it, but this is my railway and I give the orders. And I certainly don't condone my engines talking back at me like that."

"Eat me, Pap smear!" Duncan growled.

"That's it! To your shed, on the double!" Mr. Percival roared. Duncan huffed off to the shed, defeated but none the more proud to have stood his ground. Rachel, on the other hand, was fuming at Mr. Percival. She had enough too.

"It's not fair, sir." Rachel protested. "Just because someone says a dirty word every known doesn't make them a dirty person."

"Maybe not, but talking down to your superior is our sure of getting someone out of the good books." Mr. Percival retorted.

"Don't be such a bitch." Rachel sniffed. Her driver gasped and fireman gasped.

"Rachel, if you say the word 'bitch' to me, again. You're off to the shed, as well." Mr. Percival issued a warning. Rachel fell silent for a moment, staring down at her superior.

"Bitch." Rachel chuffed in a low voice.

"That's it, Rachel! Off-" Mr. Percival snapped.

"I know!" Rachel growled. And with that, she steamed off to the shed in a huff. Mr. Percival was beyond steamed. He then noticed the passengers on the platform glaring at him. This made him nervous. "Surely you people are not taking their side, are you?" he asked the angry crowd.

"Fuck you, man." One angry passenger wearing a black hoodie saluted him with the finger and he stormed off.

"I second that!" agreed Henry and he whished steam and set off on his journey.

Meanwhile, at the sheds, Duncan and Rachel sat in silence at being "sent to bed without supper." They were none too happy about this, but at least, they wouldn't be alone. The two decided to make the most out of their situation. Being sent away garnered the opportunity for the engines to speak in privacy. Duncan having to admit his feelings is one thing, but to admit it in public was mortifying. "Why did you get yourself in trouble?" Duncan asked.

"Why? I tell you why." Rachel answered. "Because I was sick of seeing you being punished all the time for something so… trivial. I couldn't stand that sight of you being put down by Mr. Percival all the time."

"Well, you really shouldn't have done that. But thanks." Duncan grinned slightly.

"Please, you'd think I'd let you go through this alone?" Rachel smiled. "God no."

"Still, it's not a valid reason to get yourself into trouble." Duncan made a strong point.

"Not as valid as getting alone time with you." Rachel retorted.

"There is that." Duncan chuckled. The two engines gazed at one for a moment. They couldn't help but smile at each other. With no secrets to hide, they could finally be open and candid. "So, Duncan. You meant what you said before?" Rachel asked.

"Indeed I did." Duncan admitted. "I meant every word."

"So did I, luv." Rachel chuckled. "And I'd really like the both of us to get to know each other better. That is, if you want to."

"Yeah, I do." Duncan liked the idea. "But how do we that?"

"Just talk things out, I guess." Rachel proposed. Duncan was a little cautious.

"You really want to do this?" he wondered.

"Of course I do." Rachel chuffed nervously. "But you should know something first, I've been hurt before."

"So have I." Duncan puffed. The two engines then stared longingly at one another. If they had hands, they would definitely hold each others. The other engines had heard what had happened to Duncan and Rachel, but they weren't angry at them. In fact, they were rather impressed. As the little engines puffed back to the sheds after a long days work, they couldn't help but feel proud for Duncan for "taking hold of his own destiny" as Duke grandly put it. There were no jokes at his expense; rather there was admiration for him. If only they would have had the guts to stand up to Mr. Percival and "steal the heart of the fair maiden." Anyway, the little engines were exhausted and were longing for a good nights rest. Duncan and Rachel had long since taken in early by the time everyone else had turned in, yet there was one engine that couldn't sleep, not until he got something off his chest. Or in this case, engine. "Psst, Duncan." Rusty whispered to Duncan. "Duncan!" he whispered again. Duncan stirred angrily from his sleep; he wearily glanced over to Rusty's direction.

"What it is?" Duncan mumbled.

"I gotta tell you this, mate." Rusty whispered. "Well done, Duncan. You really took it to Mr. Percival earlier."

"Humph." Duncan grunted. "It was nothing, really. He was just getting on my bloody nerves." He sniffed.

"It wasn't nothing, my friend." Rusty sniggered. "I was getting tired of his disciplinarian views on swearing too. Do you know many times I wanted say 'fuck' and 'shit' out on the open line, but couldn't because of Mr. Percival's strict stance on curse words? Too many times to count, as a matter of fact. Dude, if you hadn't said anything to him, then I would have and it would not have been fucking pretty." Duncan was slightly alarmed at Rusty's dark little rant, but he also felt proud that someone else was taking his side on the matter.

"Well, thank you, my friend." Duncan yawned. "But you didn't wake me up just to tell me this, did you?"

"No, there's just one more thing." Said Rusty. "Congrats on snagging Rachel aboard your love-train. You're very lucky to have her."

"Thanks, I guess." Duncan puffed. The little engines soon drifted quietly off to sleep. It was a trying day; none of the engines had imagined something like this happen on their quiet little railway. Although, what would tomorrow bring? Only time would tell… God, I hate that cliché.

A new dawn caressed the beautiful landscape. It was a different kind of morning to what the little engines usually had experienced. They weren't grumpy and irritable as they usually were in the mornings; instead were feeling bright and chirpy. They were celebrating perhaps the start of something wonderful; Duncan and Rachel's little relationship. At first, the idea of someone as brash and tough as Duncan going out with someone as sweet and innocent as Rachel was beyond them as rational engines. Then the little engines thought that maybe Rachel would finally soothe Duncan's gruff and harsh exterior and actually make him "likeable". But then again, they were just happy to see that Duncan had found someone special. With the Sodor sun slowly peaking over the mountains, the little engines were fired up for another rigorous day of hard labour. As Duncan was himself about to set off, Duke quickly puffed up beside him. "Pardon me, my boy. I have to tell you something." The old engine called to Duncan.

"Yes, what is it?" he asked.

"Congratulations, my boy." Duke winked. "You're very lucky."

"Thank you, Duke. I am very lucky." Duncan cocked an eyebrow. Rachel slowly steamed by, blowing a flirty kiss to Duncan. The little Douglas class engine became very flustered and he shook in his wheelbase, almost derailing in the process. Duke just laughed to himself. "This would definitely suite His Grace." Duke smiled and steamed away. All of a sudden, Mr. Percival rode in on his bike. All the engines stopped dead in their tracks. "Meeting in the yards, now." He said sternly and rode away very quickly. Soon, the little engines were gathered in the transfer yards at Crovan's Gate. They all wondered why a meeting was called in the first place. They would find out soon enough. As Mr. Percival rode up onto the platform, all the engines quieted down. There was an unsteady silence as Mr. Percival wiped his brow with a handkerchief and straightened his tie. He then cleared his throat to begin. "Thank you all for showing up." He began, not releasing that Ivo Hugh was nowhere in sight.

"As you know, I've been very strict when it comes any form of profanity on my railway. I've always disliked such vulgar language, being a plain speaking person. I prefer to get my point across without resorting to cuss words and such." Rachel mouthed a silent "blah blah blah" towards Duncan who snickered loudly.

"Quiet." Mr. Percival turned to Duncan. "Now, when it comes to this sort of thing, I've always put my foot down, taking it to just a simple act of punishment of "going to sit in the corner", so to speak. However, after being told about my actions can spark up controversy, as of this moment, I'm discontinuing the practice of said punishment." The little engines gasped and talked amongst themselves. Duncan mouth a overjoyed "fuck yeah" while his driver just got up and did a victory dance, throwing his limbs about like Peter Garrett from Midnight Oil.

The driver sang the lyrics to The Safety Dance rather loudly. Everyone just looked at him with such dismay. Duncan's driver saw this display of disbelief from everyone and sat beside his engine.

"As I was saying." Mr. Percival continued. "I've decided to abandon the practice of this sort of punishment, not so much for your sake but for my own sake as well." He thought back to the sight of the angry crowd back at the station and angry hooded character that swore profusely at him afterwards.

"However, this doesn't mean that I don't want to hear such dirty words, I'm just saying that, please, keep the use of colouful language to yourselves. Or at the very least, don't say them in front of me." Mr. Percival urged his engines.

"We'll do our very best, Monsieur Cul de Visage." Duke called out. Mr. Percival didn't speak a word of English, not realizing that what Duke said was Mister Arse face!

"Very good." Mr. Percival smiled. Duke just snickered. "Now for some good news. Tomorrow, we'll be expecting more new engines to arrive on our humble railway, so don't be late and-" At that very moment, a loud whistle was heard. Puffing into the yards at full bore was Ivo Hugh. The engines just sighed as the little engine screeched to a violent halt.

"Terribly sorry for being late." Ivo Hugh puffed in, very much out of breathe and with eyes looking very red indeed. Mr. Percival was not very impressed, crossing his arms in clear disappointment.

"This is getting to become a habit, Ivo Hugh." Mr. Percival snapped. "At first, this was just cute but now this is becoming most annoying. It's just not on!"

"Well maybe if my driver would stop smoking weed, I wouldn't be so freaking late!" Ivo Hugh grumbled loudly. All the engines gasped. His driver choked up with disbelief and so did Mr. Percival. He was most displeased. "Is this true?" Mr. Percival asked sternly. The driver struggled for an answer.

"Well, er, I, errrrr… whoa dude." The driver chuckled euphorically. Mr. Percival's face turned a deep shade of red.

"Search him." He ordered. In a flash, some of the engine crews pulled the clearly stoned driver from the cab and searched his person. They found an unfeasibly large joint his pocket, along with a BMF (Bad Mother Fucker) cigarette lighter and filter paper. "A drug addict." Mr. Percival was furious. "On MY railway!"

"You can find the rest of his stuff in my cab." Ivo Hugh puffed. An hour later, the drug addled driver was taken away in cuffs as was the equally addled fireman who was also deeply responsible in his actions. It was later explained by Ivo Hugh that he too was fed marijuana along with his coal in an effort to shut him up. Everyone thought that poor Ivo was the innocent victim in all of this. The engines felt sympathetic for him but also remorseful for teasing him so intensely for his constant lateness. Despite all of this, Mr. Percival also felt responsible for all of this, not realizing that he had incompetent and drug fueled workmen on his line. It was lucky for him and the railway itself that no one was ever killed or hurt during the time when Ivo Hugh's current crew worked on the Skarloey railway. Nevertheless, he was cleaned out and shut away for a while in order to purge the evil drug from his system. In the meantime, Mr. Percival rung for a new crew… preferably non smokers. They wouldn't arrive until the next morning.

The rest of the day without incident, all the engines worked their hardest without their fallen comrade. It was difficult to say the least with the extra work, but the engines didn't complain. They were looking forward to the future and the next in a series of new engines to become part of the Skarloey railway family. They all wondered about the sort of engines that would be arriving. Fearless Freddie was optimistic that it would someone from his old railway at the Welsh Highland Railway. Peter Sam and Sir Handel wondered if their old nemesis Stanley (aka #2) would come back from the dead. Rusty thought about another diesel would be joining the ranks. He and Fred were still not getting along. Still, as high as the anticipation rose from the little engines funnels, they still had their jobs to do. Later that night, the engines were fast asleep in their cozy little sheds. It was a trying day for all of them, especially for Ivo Hugh who was jittery from the withdrawal symptoms of the marijuana in his systems. Rachel found it hard to sleep; there was something she wanted to get off her boiler. She looked over to Duncan who was well and truly dead to the world. "Duncan." Rachel whispered to Duncan. "Duncan, are you awake?" she whispered louder. Duncan stirred back to the realm of the living.

"I'm awake now." Duncan answered. "What is it?" He yawned.

"I love you." Rachel chuffed proudly. Duncan was slightly alarmed this but he just smiled back at Rachel. All those other times, he couldn't bring himself to say the right words to Rachel, but this time, he knew exactly what to say.

"I love you, too." He puffed, looking deep into Rachel's twinkling eyes. Duncan had never felt happier. He was truly in love and that was all that mattered to him.