Hello, my lovely readers! First of all, I just wanted to thank you guys for sticking with me :) It makes me happy that I still have some fans that don't loose hope ;)

Secondly, I want to apologize ahead for this chapter. I don't think it's the best I've ever writen, but I think it's fairly good. I'm sorry if it's not as funny as you'd hoped for though. :(

Lastly, PLEASE read the AN at the bottom, :)

*WARNINGS*: contains mild cussing, and sexual references! (Gosh darn it Emmett!) :)

DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything. Nope... Juicy and Coach and Wal-Mart and any of the characters mentioned are NOT MINE Clear? ;)

I awoke to the sounds of glass breaking.

Oh God, this can't be good.

I pulled my hair into a ponytail, changed quickly, and then walked out of the door.

"NO! WE NEED TO GO SHOPPING!"

"Alice, calm down."

"NO!"

Before I knew what was going on, I was knocked off my feet by Alice.

I sat up and rubbed my head. "This is why most girls choose non-vampire families." I said, laughing.

Edward smirked, walking over and lending me a hand to get up. "Sorry," He said, kissing me on the cheek. "Carlisle and Alice were having another argu-"

"WE WEREN'T ARGUING!" Carlisle said, stepping in front of us. "Dr. Cullen is the serene, kind, handsome doctor who doesn't argue! God, get it right." He shook his head and walked to the front of the RV, beside Esme.

"Uh, ok then." Edward said, looking scared. "Anyway, we're here."

"Here...?" I asked, moving to make myself some tea.

Emmett hit me on the back. "C'mon, you can get tea at a dunkin' doughnuts or something." He said, grabbing me and carrying me out of the RV.

"EMMETT!" I screamed, kicking.

I heard an evil laugh.

"Ali," I said, still suspended above the ground. "For such a tiny person, you sure have one hell of an evil laugh." She giggled and danced out into the light.

"Look, we're already here, so there's no use arguing."

"Can someone please tell me where the hell 'here' is?" I asked, getting frustrated. "AND PLEASE PUT ME DOWN EM!" I yelled, kicking him.

"Even though I can't feel it, it's not very nice." He said, slowly lowering me.

We all stared at him.

"Dude," Jasper said, putting his PS3 in his pocket. "That was Edward's line like, two chapters ago. Get your own material."

"Yea," I said, moving over to Edward. He wrapped his arm around me. "And if you're going to steal something he says, at least do it well. You butchered that."

Rosalie laughed. "God. This is what I get for rushing into a wedding." She sighed and grabbed his arm. "C'mon, let's go."

We all walked a few feet, into the doors of a shopping center.

"Oh god." I sighed, seeing all of the designer boots, bags, and clothes making up the colourful window displays. "Really?"

"Yep." Alice said, dragging me towards Coach.

"Alice, do you really think Bella is a Coach kind of girl?" Rose asked, tilting her head to the side as if she were studying me.

Alice stopped, then looked at me. "Mmmm. I see your point Rose. Maybe we should choose something else..." She began to lead us towards a Juicy Couture store.

I turned around to face Edward and the others. "SAVE ME." I whispered.

Edward smirked, and waved. "It's female bonding time. Have fun."

Esme looked at the boys. "Ok, you go that way, and we'll go this way." She kissed Carlisle on the cheek.

"Carrrrliiiissssslllleeee..." Alice said, walking up to him.

"Yes?" He asked, sighing and pulling out his wallet. "How much?"

Alice smiled. "Well, just give us your credit card. It'll be easier." She snatched it out of the leather pocket.

"Damn it Alice," Carlisle said, putting his wallet back in his pocket. "What's the point of me taking away your cards if you're going to spend all of my money?" He sighed.

"Love you!" She said, pecking him on the cheek. "Let's go girls!"

I looked back at Edward, deciding to run towards him.

"C'mon Bells." Rosalie said, pulling me back by my jacket. "This is for your own good."

Edward smirked and waved at me. "Stupid vampires." I muttered under my breath.

I knew we had reached the first store when I heard Alice clapping. "You know that people make fun of Paula Abdul for clapping like that right?" I asked. She rolled her eyes.

"Let's go." We walked in, and instantly 3 sales ladies were all over us. God, it was worse than a car dealership. And Edward had dragged me to enough of those to know the stupid sales people by name.

"Ooooh!" Esme and Alice said at the same time. They left our side and both shot to opposite sides of the store, ignoring the ladies in front of us.

"Just browsing." Rose said, smiling at them. "..Stupid.." Rose muttered, pulling me towards the shirts.

"Hmmm..." She said, pulling pink, blue, and green shirts up to my face. "Yep, for once Edward was right. Blue is so your colour."

"Great." I sighed, not really interested in shopping. "Why do we need to do this again?" I asked as Rose piled 3 shirts into a basket.

"Because," She replied, looking through the sweat suits. "No one packed the suitcases. Remember?"

I sighed again. "Right." I grabbed a hoodie from the rack. "Hey, this isn't too bad."

Alice came up behind us and gasped.

"ROSE!" She yelled, snatching the sweat suits out of her hands.

"Alice, What the hell?" Rose asked, picking up the clothes that had been discarded on the floor.

"Rose," Alice said again, taking the clothing items and placing them back on the rack. "C'mon, you know that only LGs wear Juicy Couture track suits!" She screamed. Several heads turned towards us.

"Err," I said, putting the hoodie back. "Sorry guys, but what's an LG?"

Rosalie and Alice gave me looks of shock.

"Seriously?" Alice asked, dragging me away from the multicoloured velour sweat suits.

Suddenly Esme came up behind us. "Girls, let's go. There's not really anything here need."

Alice nodded, clearly glad to avoid explaining to me what an LG was.

"Let's just say," Rose said under her breath as we exited the store. "Think… Jane."

I was confused. "Jane is an LG?" I bit my lip. I don't think I was supposed to be super scared of an LG. Whatever the hell they were.

She laughed. "Kind of. Ok, Tanya?"

I nodded. "Ok, I think I get it."

"Really?"

"No."

"Oh well, I tried." We followed Esme and Alice towards the next store. I looked down at my shoes, and something shiny caught my eye.

"Ooh! A penny!" I bent down to pick it up, and felt someone run into me.

"Ouch!" I said as I landed on the hard cement. I quickly checked to make sure I wasn't bleeding.

I heard laughter from above me. "Jasper? Emmett?" I looked up at them. "Really?" Emmett extended his hand and helped me up.

"Sorry Bells," He said, grinning like a two year old. "Accidents happen."

"Whatever." I said, brushing myself off. "Where's Edward?"

"Oh, let's just say he's…preoccupied."

Instantly my mind flashed with Images of the things Emmett and Jasper could have done to their 'youngest' brother, causing me to shudder.

"Anyway, we're all heading over to Wally World." Jasper said, putting a headphone in his ear.

I raised an eyebrow. "Wally World?"

"Yep." He said, plugging his other ear with a headphone.

I sighed and walked with them towards Wal-Mart.

As we walked through the automatic doors, a wave of cool air hit us, causing me to shiver.

"Need a sweater?" I turned around and saw a voice coming from a boy, no older than 17. Mind you, that's what I thought about Edward when I met him. Turns out he was older than 100…

"Oh, uh…" I said, unsure how to respond. He was dressed in a simple sweater and jeans. I smiled.

"I'm fine thanks."

"Ok," He said, disappointment showing on his face. "But If yo…" Before he could continue, he got interrupted by Emmett.

"Don't mess with my little sister." He said, lifting the boy by his shirt.

The boy bit his lip. "Uh, sorry dude." He said, looking at Emmett.

Jasper nudged Emmett's arm, then Emmett looked to where he was pointing and dropped the boy. "You're lucky I was the one here, and not her boyfriend." He said the last word with such venom that it would have made anyone scared.

I smiled shyly at him. "Sorry." I said, biting my lip.

He smiled back. "I would keep hitting on you, but your family is crazy." He winked and walked away.

I sighed. "C'mon, can't you guys just try to be normal?"

The two vampires in front of me looked shocked. I looked at their faces and then realized what they must have thought.
"No!" I said, waving my hands in front of me. "I just mean for the sake of the family, we have to be as normal as possible! Not just because that guy. No! I love Edward." I smiled as I felt two cold hands slip around me from behind.

"Hi." He said, kissing my cheek.

I shivered, smiling. "Hi." I replied, tracing circles onto his hands.

"ANYWAY." Emmett said, smirking. "I've always wanted to have sex with Rose in Wal-Mart." With that, he left, trying to find his wife.

"Err," I said, holding back laughter.

"Only Emmett." Edward said, laughing.

Jasper shrugged, bopping his head to the music.

"Hmm," I said, seeing Emmett's head bob among the racks of clothing. "Want to have some fun?"

Edward smiled. "You know it." He said, turning me around to face him. "What did you have in mind?"

I winked. "You'll just have to wait. Text everyone and tell them to meet us in the camping department."

TEN MINUTES LATER.

"We're here Edward. This better be important!" Emmett said, a box of condoms in his hand.

Carlisle sighed. "Honestly?" He asked, rubbing his head. "You children are like rabbits. Can't you stop for a day?"

Emmett smiled. "Nope."

Rose and Alice made their way into the tent. "So, what did you want?" Alice asked. Rose looked at Emmett and sighed.

"You moron. I've already told you, we're not having sex in a Wal-Mart! Especially while our family is here! And," She said, taking the box of condoms from him. "We don't need these." She threw them out across the store. "Ok, now, what was so important Edward?"

"Well," I said, laughing from the situation that had unfolded. "I was just thinking," I bit my lip. What if they hated the idea? "What if…"

I was cut off by the lights turning off. "Uh…" Emmett said, pointing to the ceiling. "I'm pretty sure that's not supposed to happen."

Rose slapped the back of his head.
Alice jumped into Jasper's arms. "It's dark." She said, hugging him. "And worst of all, we're in a Wal-Mart! This is worse than a horror movie!"

Everyone laughed. "I'm sure it's just a minor power outage or something." Carlisle said, walking to the front of the store. Much to his dismay, the doors were locked.

"Ugh," Carlisle said, turning towards the group. "Looks like we're locked in here."

"YOU SAY IT SO CALMLY!" Alice screamed. "LIKE WE'RE ORDERING CHINEESE FOOD!"

Jasper sighed and put an arm around his wife. "No worries Ali," He said, walking towards the door. "We'll just break out." He looked at the glass door and punched it.

I closed my eyes, expecting to hear the sound of breaking glass. I opened my eyes in surprise when the only sound was Jasper cursing.

"God!" He said, shaking his hand out. "This is crazy."

"Try the locks." Esme suggested, pushing Edward toward the padlock.

He fiddled with it for a minute, bending down and examining it.

Emmett yawned. "C'mon Eddie, stop analyzing the heck out of it."

Edward rolled his eyes at his brother, then stood up and sighed. "Sorry, I don't think we can get through this door."

Alice's eyes were larger than my truck's headlights.
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN?" She yelled, hitting Edward's chest with her tiny little fists.

Edward grabbed her hands. "We're stuck." He said, annunciating his words.

She looked as if she would cry if she could.

"Do we have anything that she could buy?" I asked, looking around. I thought about it, and then gasped, running towards the toy isle.

I found what I was looking for, but couldn't reach the box by myself. I sighed. Well, this was a stupid idea. "Edward?" I yelled, hoping he would hear me. No reply. "Apparently the vampire hearing only works when I don't want it to." I said with a scowl. I looked at the pole beside me. 'Intercom Assistance' I read off the sign above a phone. "Perfect!" I said, grabbing it.

"Attention," My voice rang over the intercom, I giggled. "I feel like god!" I muttered, forgetting they could all hear me now. "Uh… Anyway, Edward, can you come over here? I need you to help me carry something. Thanks… Oh, this is Bella by the way. Not God or any other supernatural thing… uh, yea." I put the phone back, and instantly heard Emmett's booming laugh. "Great."

Edward was at my side in seconds. "What do you need, love?" He asked, smiling at me.

"Well," I said, pointing above my head, "Do you think Alice would like this?"

He smiled and nodded. "I think so." He laughed. "I'll get it."

BACK WITH THE OTHERS (3rd person)

Carlisle looked at his 'daughter', and sighed. "Alice," He said, putting a hand on her shoulder. He could hear her sharp intake of breath.
"Alice, it's not that bad." He said.

Alice turned around, her eyes turning a dark, dark, gold.

"Carlisle," She said coolly, glaring. "You don't understand. Wal-Mart is like, my nightmare. Know what's worse?" She cringed. "Being around all of this stuff, and not being able to buy it."

Everyone sighed. "Honestly Ali?" Rosalie asked, applying lip gloss. "We'll get out of here. It's not like Wal-Mart has Vampire-Proof locks!" Everyone stared at her. "Oh damn," She said, putting the cap on her lip gloss. "They kind of do eh?"

"Blonde moment." Jasper said through coughs. Emmett laughed, along with Esme and Carlisle.

If looks could kill, Rosalie would have murdered four vampires. Instead, she turned to Alice, who was looking at the ceiling. "Alice?" Rose asked, following her gaze. There was a sign above the door. Rose read it aloud. "This door is to remain unlocked at all times when there are people inside." She read, and then furrowed her perfect eyebrows.

Alice screamed. "THE SIGN IS MOCKING ME!" She said, pulling at her hair. "WHY DO THEY HATE ME?" She stood up, ran towards a sale sign, grabbed the yellow smiley face, and tore it to shreds.

"Well, It's official," Emmett said, looking sideways at his sister. "Alice has gone crazy."

Hello, hello again! Hope you all enjoyed that chapter! :) Please please please take the time to Reveiw if you can! Honestly, they mean so much to me! So please, if you're not too busy, review! Even if you hated it (which I sure as heck hope you didn't, but hey, maybe you did!) Please review anyway so I know what to work on for next time!

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FanArt

Ok, so, if you happen to be an artist, or even if you're not, I've recently decided that I need pictures. And hey, guess what. I CAN'T DRAW. Honestly, not at all. lol. So, that's where you guys come in! I will use my favourite picture as my profile picture, and I'll find things to do with the others. FB page maybe? Lol! :)

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