A/N: Somewhere around the end of this chapter it dawned on me—this will be my last installment for this story, at least for a while. I shall mark it as 'Complete', but if I ever feel the need of continuing this thread, I shall simply start a series of stories :)
Great big thanks to everybody who read and reviewed this story—I'm sorry I haven't been able to answer most of the reviews I got recently, but my influenza has been killing me for the last two weeks, and as soon as I was done writing and updating, I'd skip into a 'hate' phase of my relationship with my laptop, basking in my constant headache groans
Anyway, I hope you like this chapter, and don't find my way of ending this story too awkward. Please enjoy!
0o0o0o0o0o
Potter looked at the assembled group over his glasses. Hawkeye was sitting sprawled comfortably on Margaret's cot, the Major's back supported against his chest, one of his arms encircling her waist, fingers gently touching the needle still placed in her arm as the second I.V. hasn't finished yet. Father Mulcahy and Charles occupied the chairs in the middle of the tent, while himself had been seated in the legs of Alicia's bunk.
BJ stood by the door with his arms folded, eyes fixed on the floor. Radar, being forced to stand beside him, had a very uneasy look upon his face.
Potter's eyed traveled from one of his Captains to the other, as the old man suppressed a sigh. The tension inside the tent could be bombed—it was far beyond the cutting point.
"I have an unpleasant announcement to make," he stated, consulting his notes. "The CO of an Italian MASH unit called me this morning to ask for an arterial transplant presentation. They'd been having a lot of casualties requiring the transplant lately, and couldn't help them without the knowledge of the procedure, which is why I agreed to spare a surgeon and a nurse for one day, starting tomorrow at twelve hundred hours. Since both Pierce and Winchester had already done their share, this leaves you, BJ. Are you up to it?"
"Yes, Colonel," the questioned man answered curtly and proceeded with his observations of the Bugs Life on the Floor.
"Good. Major, would you be so kind and name the nurse to accompany Hunnicutt?"
"Yes, sir."
"That won't be necessary."
Everyone turned to look at Alicia, who sat up straight on her cot, readjusting the pullover she'd been wearing. "I could go with Doctor Hunnicutt… if that's alright with you," she added in a small voice, raising her eyes to meet BJ's.
He staggered visibly and lowered his gaze for a moment, before meeting Ali's eyes with a definite look on his face. "I would appreciate your help and expertise in this. Do you feel fit enough to endure the journey?"
"I do, thank you," she answered, the politeness behind their carefully measured words stinging everybody in the room. "Major, permission to accompany Captain Hunnicutt tomorrow?"
"Permission granted," Margaret answered hesitantly, seeing the pleading look in Ali's eyes. She could feel Hawkeye's body stiffen behind her, and rubbed her head against his shoulder in the smallest of motions, her fingers intertwining with his on her lap. The personnel present wisely chose to pretend they haven't seen a thing.
"Then it's a deal," Potter concluded and stood up, tired of being in the same place with so much tension flying around. "Thank you for attending the meeting. Dismissed." He went over to Margaret's bunk, and looked her in the eye. "How are you feeling, Houlihan?"
"Better now, thank you, sir," she replied, sitting straight. "Do I really need all this?" she made a round gesture taking in the bunk, the take-away tray of hardly touched food and the I.V.
"As long as Pierce decides you need rest and medical attention, this is exactly what you'll get. Hawkeye, what do you think?"
"I can't say without a full blood examination, but I'd reckon she's better now," Hawkeye answered calmly, his arm still wrapped around Margaret's waist. "I'm even considering a possibility of taking her out for a walk tomorrow."
"How nice of you," she made a face at him, but inwardly she was jumping with joy. 'A walk' could mean anything in Hawkeyish, and she wasn't particularly keen to let the opportunity pass. Hawkeye gave her a knowing smile and stood up, checking on the needle one last time.
"You can take it out once this bottle is done," he said, suddenly looking deadly serious. "I need to talk with one friend of mine, of you excuse me."
Alicia jumped to him, squeezing his arm in a pleading gesture. "Ben, remember…"
"I know, I know," he snapped, but didn't shake her hand away. "I won't kill him, at least not straight away."
With this, he left, leaving two very anxious women behind him.
0o0o0o0o0o
"So, you've got yourself a lovely assistant for your long and tiring journey, huh?"
"Honestly, Hawkeye, that wasn't my idea—"
"I know; I saw your face in there—you were quite willing to dig a hole in the ground and hide if you only could."
"So you don't blame me?"
"Of course I blame you! Who do you think is the reason for her acting like this?!"
"I told you how I feel! You know I'm not some cold-blooded jerk; this thing is affecting me, too! What do you want me to do? Shall I refuse, and tell her she cannot go with me? Do think that would work better?"
"I don't think anything. I just hope both of you come to your senses soon enough, and start acting like two responsible adults!"
"So you think I'm irresponsible, right?"
"Aren't you?"
"Damn it, Hawkeye! I can't shut my heart off and order it to stop beating, for God's sake! Would that be responsible?"
"How should I know? I've never been married."
"I've never been in such a situation!"
"Which is supposed to be your explanation?"
"It is not! I'm trying to work this out! Don't you believe me?"
"I don't believe that two people who feel to each other what you two do can act rationally."
"…"
"I don't want any of you to get hurt."
"I would never hurt her."
"I know you wouldn't."
"Then what's your problem?"
"This is not the time for 'would's and 'wouldn't's. It's time for 'will's and 'won't's."
"Give me those twenty four hours. Trust me, Hawkeye."
"Do I have a choice…?"
0o0o0o0o0o
"You know you don't have to do this, right?"
"I'm fine, Margaret, I really am. I just need to work it all out, and being able to talk to BJ, and him alone, should help me do that."
Margaret raised her eyebrows, as her eye caught sight of a silk nightie Alicia has being stuffing into her bag.
She wasn't sure if her going with BJ was such a great idea.
0o0o0o0o0o
"Do you suppose she really loves him?"
Hawkeye sighed deeply and handed her a saltine. "She sure thinks she does, which makes it just as bad as the real thing."
"Since when love is a bad thing?"
"Not every kind of love," he stated, looking down on the blanket they were both sitting on. "Some kinds of love, however, could bring more torment than happiness, and that's why I find them unnecessary."
Margaret bit her tongue before she gave in to the urge of asking 'What about us?'. It was far too early to talk of big things like feelings and commitments. Right now she simply wanted to enjoy the sun, as long as she was shaded by a tree, the gentle breeze that eased the heat, and saltines, cold coffee and jam, which were the only supplies Hawkeye managed to steal from the cook for their little picnic.
At first she couldn't help but wonder how many nurses he'd taken out on a picnic before her, and it made her sad and sulky. For a second she feared he might make a saucy comment of her name being finally added to his list of conquests, or anything similar, but Hawkeye surprised her in behaving like a perfect gentleman. She could finally understand what made her nurses fall for him, even with his reputation as the greatest womanizer in Korea following him everywhere he went—he had the gift of making every single woman feel special, and Margaret was no exception.
Which led to yet another question: was this what she really wanted?
Yes, she was quite sure she would like to have him as a lover, but whether their relationship was to remain an obligation-free, open one, or were they to commit themselves to one another, was yet to be decided and, preferably, discussed, before they took their acquaintanceship to another level.
"Am I really this dull, Margaret?"
"What?" she asked, blinking absentmindedly as his voice brought her out of her thoughts and into the reality. He smiled at her, and caressed her bare arm with a straw of grass.
"You haven't heard a thing of what I was saying, have you?" There was no disappointment in his voice, no impatience, accusation or anger. He simply made on observation, and waited for her to comment on it.
"I'm sorry," she said, truthfully. "I was thinking about what you said… BJ and Alicia… and us, here… and how you used to bring other women to picnics… and what it meant for me to be here, and—"
"Margaret," he interrupted gently, placing one hand under her chin and making her look at him, as he leaned into her, "you think too much."
She was gone the moment his lips touched hers.
She thought she remembered the way it used to feel (in fact, she treasured the memories of those few kisses they shared in the course of their… yes, acquaintanceship was a good word), but the time must have made the sensation fade away. Or maybe it was because she's been thinking about it for such a long time. She hung on to him with strength she never knew she possessed, and responded with energy she'd never say she was capable of.
And that was just a kiss.
Oh, my.
Maybe thinking really was overrated, and it was better to simply go with the flow, and see what the time brings?
"Oh, my," she voiced her thoughts after he let go of her, and the ability to form words and sentences had returned. "That was… intense."
"My sentiments exactly," he whispered sensually and pecked her on the lips. "Do you think we could do it again?"
She quirked a brow at him. "I thought you said you're being preoccupied with other things right now… Though it seems I'm the one doing the unnecessary thinking at the moment, aren't I?"
He grinned, never failing to caress her arms and shoulders as he spoke: "I do think about that all the time, but it is beyond our scope to help them out of this situation. I talked to BJ before, and he seemed reasonable enough for me to quit worrying for a while, and move on to far more pleasant matters in hand," he finished, nibbling playfully on her earlobe. "Shall we continue our date, mademoiselle? I am going to require your full attention from now on, mind you."
"Do you have something special in mind?" she inquired, playing with his dog-tags. He grinned at her like a five-year-old who has just been offered a great big lollipop.
"How about a quick visit to the supply tent? There's always your quarters, too, since Ali isn't here today—"
"You're uncorrectable," she stated with a roll of her eyes, and was about to pull him in for another kiss when they both heard the choppers coming in from North. Hawkeye grunted and pulled Margaret up to her feet.
"Never a moment of privacy," he complained with a mock pout. "Still, I'm taking a rain check on—" he kissed her again, more firmly than before, '—some things."
"I'll remember that," she answered, a bit out of breath, and didn't object when he took her hand, already running towards the compound.
0o0o0o0o0o
"It's a small camp," BJ said the following evening, sitting in an armchair behind Father Mulcahy's tent. Ali, occupying the other one, nodded in agreement.
"How long do you think it will be before everybody knows?"
"You assume there's somebody who doesn't know yet?"
She laughed, and nudged him playfully on the ribs. He nudged back, held his hand on her arm for a fraction of a second, and smiled sadly. "I feel like we've gained something beautiful, but lost something special we shall never know about all the same."
"That's the thing about choices," she pointed out, giving his fingers a gentle squeeze. "You can't eat the cookie and keep it, something like that."
"I know."
They let the silence fall onto them, holding hands in soft, warm twilight, sipping their drinks. Twenty minutes later Ali broke the spell, giving out a hearty yawn.
"Don't you want to go to sleep?" BJ asked, concerned. "We had one helluva day."
"I do… but I don't think it'll be safe to go back to my tent just yet," she answered with a wink. BJ roared with laughter, but stood up nonetheless.
"You can sleep on Hawkeye's bunk until he's back. That's only fair, you know."
"Aren't you afraid of what people might think?"
"They'll be far too preoccupied with the other thing going around to pay attention," he stated firmly and offered her his hand. She took it, and let herself be pulled up and into his casual embrace. Their faces came close, but none of them moved to close the distance.
"I should request a transfer," she whispered, lowering her gaze.
"Don't," he pleaded, and started off towards the Swamp, not meeting her eyes. "I couldn't go on without you, without this. Not anymore."
As they were passing Margaret's door, it opened to reveal a silhouette of a man, beaming brightly in the slowly falling darkness. Both BJ and Alicia burst out laughing at the sight.
"You look like a cat that just had a whole bowl of sweet cream," BJ stated, letting go of Alicia's hand and swapping Hawkeye playfully on the shoulder. The dark-haired surgeon winced.
"I will not lower myself to answering this," he said with mock dignity, and turned on his heel to embrace a smiling Margaret, who came to the door to check what was going on. "Goodnight, sweet one."
"Goodnight, you freak," she sighed and let him kiss her cheek, since BJ and Ali were sufficiently blocking the view of them from the compound. "Don't be late for your shift tomorrow."
"Well, if I overslept you could always come and drag me off my bed… or at least attempt to."
"You're insufferable," she stated, and pushed him out of her tent. "To sleep with you, and now."
"Right, mother," he pulled a face at her, and faked a bow before letting Ali through. "Nighty-night."
As Alicia closed the door behind her, both men could hear a cheerful chatter and giggling from the inside—it took most of their will not to place their ears against the wood and listen. Hawkeye caught BJ's eye and motioned him towards the O'Club, a suggestion that was received with a warm grin.
"So," the Chief Surgeon asked his best friend as they sat in front of the Club, each of them hoisting a bottle of beer on his lap. "It would seem that I got myself a girl, my good man."
"So it would seem. Congratulations, Hawkeye; you've finally done the right thing."
"What about you? Have you got yourself a girl, or have you done the right thing?"
BJ sighed and leaned his head against the wall. "We talked a lot last night. There were so many emotions floating around us, I though the air might boil. Tears, shouts, pleads, from both of us. It was too hard to handle."
"And?"
"And we both realized, after much struggle and staying up until four a.m., that we were too scared of getting burned, and losing the friendship we have, to risk diving headlong into something we weren't sure of."
Hawkeye smiled and patted BJ's arm. "You made the right decision, Beej. Sometimes too much heat and fretting can be fatal for the feelings you have for a person, not to mention other people concerned. I'm glad you and Ali found the way to work things out."
BJ grinned saucily and poked Hawkeye on the ribs. "What about yourself and Margaret? How are things working out between the two of you?"
Hawkeye laughed loudly and stared longingly towards Margaret's tent. "You see, my friend… some like it hot."
The End
A/N: Flames or candies? What shall it be...?