A/N: I planned to write this story for a little while now. :) I really hope you enjoy it! Please review!

Disclaimer: JK Rowling owns Harry Potter and all the related characters in the series.

Has the world stopped completely and frozen over? Have the human race been forced into slavery by giant hand-puppets? Has Sirius Black stopped being such an annoying little twit who tries to look up your skirt?!

First of all, let me explain why I am questioning these seemingly impossible things:

James Potter. Has. NOT. Asked. Me. Out.

This is the point when you're supposed to gasp in shock and clap a hand over your mouth.

That's right. James Potter has not asked me out! Me! Lily Evans!

Now, I realize that the statement above makes me seem like I have an ego the size of a giant submarine. However, I have my reasons! And quite frankly, I am SHOCKED.

How could he have… not asked me out? He's been doing that ever since Third Year when I refused to kiss his smarmy little lips when we played 'Spin the Bottle' in our common room. I am not lying when I say that he once sneaked into our dormitory, dressed as a girl. An ugly girl, mind you. I still don't know how he got up that staircase!

Then, there was that time when he bribed a bunch of house-elves to follow me around all week, singing love songs. Also, there was the closet incident, but I'd prefer not to mention that. In fact, forget I even mentioned it!

But there you go! That's not even an inch thick compared to how bad he actually was!

So you can imagine my surprise when he just walked past me in the entrance hall, casually, muttering, "Hey, Evans."

I went through my normal Post-Potter-Procedure in which I check my forehead, my breath, and look around to see if anyone's laughing at me. I checked twice and there were no signs of the words "I *heart* James Potter" tattooed on my skin, or a bunch of girls giggling at my direction!

So I concluded that something was seriously wrong. With Potter.

It's not that I'm complaining or anything. In fact, it's NICE to be able to walk freely without having a James Potter jump at your leg. Really.

Why am I even wasting my time thinking about this in the middle of the Entrance Hall? Oh, that's right. I'm waiting for my best friends Vicky and Alice, who are FIVE WHOLE MINUTES late, by the way!

I groan impatiently and tap at the marble floor with my foot. I hate it when people are late. It makes you start thinking about stupid things you never really think about. Like Potter. And the way he didn't ask me out. At all.

"Liiiiily!" A familiar hand waves at my face, and I swat at it as I look up.

"Greene. You're late." I snap, scowling at my friend. "I do not care for your tardiness."

Vicky rolls her dark-brown eyes, "Oh please, Lily. By how many nanoseconds? And since when did you start calling me Greene?"

I look at Vicky and feel that sense of warm happiness of seeing my best friend again, after weeks of being avoided by my neighbours. Petunia told them I was a little… imaginative. In other words, she told them I was a complete nutter.

"Five whole minutes, Victoria." I say to her sternly, and she rolls her eyes again. "Where's Alice? I thought she was meeting us here?"

"Oh, she went off with Frank," Vicky grins, "I give it a year for them to tie the knot."

I feel slightly put out that Alice went off her boyfriend when she sat with him in the train. Well, at least she has a boyfriend! I've only ever been out with one boy and that was in my fourth year! I was all excited about getting a boyfriend but Mark put off our fourth date, muttering something inaudible about having a third person in our 'relationship'. Huh. I smelt a rat, at that point. A rat with hideously uncontrollable hair and a big, stupid grin. Sound familiar?

After that, no boy showed interest in me. I asked Remus about it, and he told me that boys tend to back off when James Potter and his best mate Sirius Black threaten to beat them with their broomsticks. Cowards.

Well, the point is, thanks very mucho to Potter, I've never had a boyfriend! See how he ruins my life in so many twisted ways?

"So how was the Duty Meeting? It was too bad you had to go off in the train." Vicky asks as we walk down the hallway towards the common room. "Did Potter ask you out again?"

She grins knowingly as if she's stupid to even ask the question. Well she is. Stupid, I mean. Obviously anyone that brings up the subject of Potter would be stupid.

"No." I say shortly, walking slightly faster. "He didn't."

"What?" She says in disbelief. She strides to catch up with me. "Oh was it that bad? What did he do this time?"

I stop all of a sudden. "He said, 'Hey Evans.'" I tell her. All of a sudden, I feel a mad rush to tell her everything, "That's ALL he said, can you believe it? During the meeting, he barely looked at me! He did not ask me out ONCE! Nothing! Nada!"

Um.. Something tells me I shouldn't have been so, erm, enthusiastic about it. And I probably shouldn't have swept my hand at that lantern, causing a string of beads to fall off. I don't know why I'm so fired up about it anyway… It must be plain shock. I blame this on you, James Potter.

"Wow." Vicky stands still, looking quite stunned. I can't blame her really. She was there when James Potter and leapt out of the close-

Hang on! Let's keep far, far away from that subject!

"He didn't ask you out." Vicky says slowly, as if she was learning the words by heart. "This is… so weird."

Tell me about it. It's like imagining Sirius Black ceasing to act retarded in the corridors. What happened to him? I say this out loud.

"Hey, Lils," Vicky gives me her wicked grin, all of a sudden. "I'm starting to believe that you want him to ask you out."

WHAT? Has she completely lost it?

"What?" I practically shout at her, "Are you completely MAD? What makes you think I want James Potter to ask me out!"

There's a loud whack as my hand hits the lantern again. Darn.

Vicky smirks at me smugly. "Oh, I don't know. I just think you're a tad bit upset that James isn't falling over his own feet to ask you ou- ah! Ow!"

Vicky claps a hand around the spot where I hit her.

"What was that for?" She glares at me, pouting. "I was only joking!"

"Well, don't say stupid things then!" I say in a you-got-what-you-deserve way, "You know how much I resent Potter and his little gang of twits."

"Yeah, well… they are quite funny with their pranks though, aren't they?"

"Wait!" I shout in sudden realisation. That's exactly it! "This is a prank! He's trying to trick me!"

I whirl around and look at her, excitedly. However, her face is blank.

"Huh?"

"Don't you get it? I won't go out with him, so he's trying to trick me!"

See? I am a genius.

Vicky stares at me, as if I'm talking to her in the language of gnats. If gnats can talk, that is.

"I don't get it. What would he trick you into doing?"

I sigh. "I don't know. He's just trying to trick me into something! Well, I won't let it happen!"

Ha. Potter must think he's so clever! Well you can't fool Lily Evans!

"Lily…" Vicky says weakly, "I don't know if it's because you're really tired or because Potter freaked you out too much, but I really think you're overreacting…"

Overreacting? Ladies and gentlemen, this is James Potter we are talking about. There are no limits to what hideous things James Potter can do.

"Vicky. It's POTTER," I remind her, "You were there when he jumped out of the closet with-"

I break off with a cringe. But the damage is done. The ship has sailed. The horses have, erm,… I should stop.

"LET'S NOT TALK ABOUT THAT!" Vicky's face is bright pink when I look at her.

"Sorry." I say apologetically.

Trying to push the horrific images out of our heads, we walk slightly faster to our common without another word.

Note to self: Must learn occlumency.

A/N: I hope the chapter was okay :) I know Lily overreacts a lot, but can you blame her? Well, she'll tone down a little bit in the next chapter… Please review and tell me what you think! Constructive criticism is appreciated!