A/N Ok People: I'm trying something new. I've read (and loved) lots of L/J
Fics where they are both the most popular people in the school. Either that
or Lily is some rebel. James is always Mr. Popularity. Well the tables have
turned my little friends. By the way don't get all offended by this because
I'm doing it as a JOKE!
Disclaimer: Anything you recognize is JKR's or Warner Brothers or some other people. Anything new is probably mine and I don't really care if they steal names or anything. Don't sue! I have a nail file and lip gloss in my purse. nothing else and the lip gloss is melted and gross. I don't use it anymore.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
In the Dictionary
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
James Potter was a major loser. True, he was the most popular loser but still he lacked some social skills. He was, as some may say, the champion of rejects. He led the Chess Club and several other acidemic clubs. Anyone who was ever picked on tried to be his friend. This was mostly because the people were too shy to approach the social elite. James was forced to play Quidditch mostly because the teachers threatened him with a failing grade if he didn't participate in any athletic activity. Actually, James was a very good Chaser and the Gryffindor head of house, Professor McGonagal, wanted that Cup more than her life.
Our story starts on an average day in November at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. James was on his way to Transfiguration with his three best friends: Sirius Black, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew (Hey I hate the guy just as much as everyone else but I don't let circumstances infulence my writing. I think that he was a really close friend and that the betrayal started after Hogwarts). They were arriving early because they really wanted good seats.
The reason they wanted good seats in Transfiguration was not because they were trying to be suck-ups, but because they needed to increase their Transfiguration skills. James, Sirius and Peter were planing on becomming Animagi. Remus was a werewolf and each month he had to go out on the grounds alone and transform away from humans. If it wasn't for the fact that Remus was absent a lot, he would have been in the social elite group. He was one of the taller people at Hogwarts and he wore his light brown hair and pale blue eyes with an air of confidence so that no one (except perhaps some of the Slytherins) could dislike him. He was a naturally amible boy with a mysterious aura.
Sirus Black was the second tallest 4th year who also had a good shot at being popular. What held him back was his name. Some people thought that his name was the worst thing that had ever reached their tender ears. He had black hair that was cut just below his ears. His gray eyes often had a glint of excitement in them. Sirius was an extremely hyper boy and that turned some people away. Many people found his energy tiresome. Sirius was James's best friend.
Peter was a pathetic thing that could easily be ignored. He had dirty blonde hair and watery hazel eyes. He was a little chubby and rather meek. Although he didn't look it, he had an excellent mind for pranks. All of the boys played pranks and used it as an outlet for their anger. Slytherins agravated them the most so they we the vicims most often. Peter was the shortest one in the group of friends.
And now, it is James's turn to be described. He was tall (so tall that he was the tallest 4th year) and lanky. The lankiness was improving due to his Quidditch training. James wore large, round glasses because without them, he was as blind as a bat. If James cared, he could have won over half the girls in Hogwarts but he choose to remain an outcast. A little known fact about James is that his is one of the weathiest wizarding families. James was almost as mysterious as Remus.
As the boys walked into the classroom, they soon noticed they were not alone. it seemed as if the whole class was already there. James was shocked; he had to be at least half an hour early. What was worse was that all the good desks were taken. James took a seat and motioned for his friends to do the same. Soon the professor came in and class started. The lesson was something the group had already learned so Sirius ceased the moment to write James a note:
Hullo, what's with the sudden interest with transfiguration?
How should I know? But I'd bet my solid gold chess set that one of the queens of popularity led all of her friends and admirers in here. Half the people in the front row are sleeping!
At least we already know this stuff. I bet the leader is Lily Evans. you'd think that after four years people would be considerate enough to keep out of your seat!
Ahh I'm too aloof to care. care to practice our chess skills after class?
righto
With that, the bell rang and the class filed out.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
That night, the four friends were planing revenge against Snape. At lunch Snape had insulted all of the Gryfindor House. His choice of words is best not repeated but it went along the lines of having no proper wizarding feeling. Snape would forever hold a grudge against James because James was so good at Quidditch without even trying and Snape practiced for hours and hours each day and still was only a reserve. Even with all of the excercise, Snape still looked mal-nourished. His skin was sallow and his eyes were deep pools of blackness; they looked like shiny scabs. As Sirius put it, "the grease on his hair could make the earth slip out of orbit."
"I think we should just send him another howler about his hair," commented Remus.
"No the bugger deserves much worse than that. How about we charm his hair into an afro and then make him sing a song," suggested James
"Brilliant, James! And we all know how horrid his voice is. Remember when we stole his clothes from the loo? I thought I had permentaly damaged my ears!" exclaimed Sirius.
"So it's settled then?"
"Of course."
The four huddled and wispered the plans for what was sure to be one of the best pranks Hogwarts had seen in a long time.
All the while, Lily Evans and her friends Diana Atterson and Hellen O'Tro were discussing the latest fashions in front of the fire. The three girls couldn't help but notice how four boys were conversing in hushed tones. The boys weren't included in their clique. The converstation turned to the boys.
"Alas, what a waste," Diana stated.
"I know. Honestly, I wish that we could change some people's personalities," Hellen complained.
"Well, lets just hope that the summer does them good. I know that some people can be total basket cases and then just being alone for three months can change them for the better. Thats what happened to my neighbor. He was all into nerdy stuff but then three months with me and now he tells me that he is one of the grooviest boys in his school," proclaimed Lily, the obvious leader of the group. Neither of the girls questioned her opinion and all the girls retired to their dormitory.
Soon afterwards, the rest of the people in the common room followed Lily's example and went to sleep. The boys all went to bed with visions of Snape in an afro. They kept waking up so that they could laugh.
Breakfast, the next day:
"NOW!!" All three boys said to James.
James mumbled something under his breath and immeadatly Snape's hair started to frizz. It was highly comical because the hair wanted to fizz but the grease kept pulling it down. Suddenly little white lice sprung out of the hair and with magically magnified voices, they began to sing:
"At first we were afraid,
We were petrified.
Kept thinking we could never live without you by our sides.
But then we spent so many nights just thinking how you did us wrong,
And we grew strong
And we learned how to get along.
So now your back
from the storage space
We just looked up to find you near,
putting that clean look upon his face
We should have hid you with a lock,
We should have dirtied up his knee.
If we'd have known for just one second,
You'd free him of acne.
Aww Now go!
Spill to the floor
Just go right down now
cause your not useful anymore
Weren't you the one who tried to cleanse him with your tries-"
Snape had run out of the room and carried his lice with him. The entire hall burst out laughing. Even Dumbledore himself was grinning.
The rest of the year passed in the same fashion. Although Snape never dared taunt any Gryfinndor about propler wizarding feeling.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~
A/N: the lice's song was supposed to be sung to I Will Survive, which, by the way, I DON'T own! soo did you like it? I plan on writing a fic that holds my real feelings on this topic but this is just kinda a joke. Should I Continue? review and tell me. please. pretty please. Ok I know the title didn't come into play here but I just felt that if I included that I would have to include all this other stuff and to me, this seems like a long chapter. And I know Lily wasn't really a major character right now but she will be i promise.
Disclaimer: Anything you recognize is JKR's or Warner Brothers or some other people. Anything new is probably mine and I don't really care if they steal names or anything. Don't sue! I have a nail file and lip gloss in my purse. nothing else and the lip gloss is melted and gross. I don't use it anymore.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
In the Dictionary
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
James Potter was a major loser. True, he was the most popular loser but still he lacked some social skills. He was, as some may say, the champion of rejects. He led the Chess Club and several other acidemic clubs. Anyone who was ever picked on tried to be his friend. This was mostly because the people were too shy to approach the social elite. James was forced to play Quidditch mostly because the teachers threatened him with a failing grade if he didn't participate in any athletic activity. Actually, James was a very good Chaser and the Gryffindor head of house, Professor McGonagal, wanted that Cup more than her life.
Our story starts on an average day in November at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. James was on his way to Transfiguration with his three best friends: Sirius Black, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew (Hey I hate the guy just as much as everyone else but I don't let circumstances infulence my writing. I think that he was a really close friend and that the betrayal started after Hogwarts). They were arriving early because they really wanted good seats.
The reason they wanted good seats in Transfiguration was not because they were trying to be suck-ups, but because they needed to increase their Transfiguration skills. James, Sirius and Peter were planing on becomming Animagi. Remus was a werewolf and each month he had to go out on the grounds alone and transform away from humans. If it wasn't for the fact that Remus was absent a lot, he would have been in the social elite group. He was one of the taller people at Hogwarts and he wore his light brown hair and pale blue eyes with an air of confidence so that no one (except perhaps some of the Slytherins) could dislike him. He was a naturally amible boy with a mysterious aura.
Sirus Black was the second tallest 4th year who also had a good shot at being popular. What held him back was his name. Some people thought that his name was the worst thing that had ever reached their tender ears. He had black hair that was cut just below his ears. His gray eyes often had a glint of excitement in them. Sirius was an extremely hyper boy and that turned some people away. Many people found his energy tiresome. Sirius was James's best friend.
Peter was a pathetic thing that could easily be ignored. He had dirty blonde hair and watery hazel eyes. He was a little chubby and rather meek. Although he didn't look it, he had an excellent mind for pranks. All of the boys played pranks and used it as an outlet for their anger. Slytherins agravated them the most so they we the vicims most often. Peter was the shortest one in the group of friends.
And now, it is James's turn to be described. He was tall (so tall that he was the tallest 4th year) and lanky. The lankiness was improving due to his Quidditch training. James wore large, round glasses because without them, he was as blind as a bat. If James cared, he could have won over half the girls in Hogwarts but he choose to remain an outcast. A little known fact about James is that his is one of the weathiest wizarding families. James was almost as mysterious as Remus.
As the boys walked into the classroom, they soon noticed they were not alone. it seemed as if the whole class was already there. James was shocked; he had to be at least half an hour early. What was worse was that all the good desks were taken. James took a seat and motioned for his friends to do the same. Soon the professor came in and class started. The lesson was something the group had already learned so Sirius ceased the moment to write James a note:
Hullo, what's with the sudden interest with transfiguration?
How should I know? But I'd bet my solid gold chess set that one of the queens of popularity led all of her friends and admirers in here. Half the people in the front row are sleeping!
At least we already know this stuff. I bet the leader is Lily Evans. you'd think that after four years people would be considerate enough to keep out of your seat!
Ahh I'm too aloof to care. care to practice our chess skills after class?
righto
With that, the bell rang and the class filed out.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
That night, the four friends were planing revenge against Snape. At lunch Snape had insulted all of the Gryfindor House. His choice of words is best not repeated but it went along the lines of having no proper wizarding feeling. Snape would forever hold a grudge against James because James was so good at Quidditch without even trying and Snape practiced for hours and hours each day and still was only a reserve. Even with all of the excercise, Snape still looked mal-nourished. His skin was sallow and his eyes were deep pools of blackness; they looked like shiny scabs. As Sirius put it, "the grease on his hair could make the earth slip out of orbit."
"I think we should just send him another howler about his hair," commented Remus.
"No the bugger deserves much worse than that. How about we charm his hair into an afro and then make him sing a song," suggested James
"Brilliant, James! And we all know how horrid his voice is. Remember when we stole his clothes from the loo? I thought I had permentaly damaged my ears!" exclaimed Sirius.
"So it's settled then?"
"Of course."
The four huddled and wispered the plans for what was sure to be one of the best pranks Hogwarts had seen in a long time.
All the while, Lily Evans and her friends Diana Atterson and Hellen O'Tro were discussing the latest fashions in front of the fire. The three girls couldn't help but notice how four boys were conversing in hushed tones. The boys weren't included in their clique. The converstation turned to the boys.
"Alas, what a waste," Diana stated.
"I know. Honestly, I wish that we could change some people's personalities," Hellen complained.
"Well, lets just hope that the summer does them good. I know that some people can be total basket cases and then just being alone for three months can change them for the better. Thats what happened to my neighbor. He was all into nerdy stuff but then three months with me and now he tells me that he is one of the grooviest boys in his school," proclaimed Lily, the obvious leader of the group. Neither of the girls questioned her opinion and all the girls retired to their dormitory.
Soon afterwards, the rest of the people in the common room followed Lily's example and went to sleep. The boys all went to bed with visions of Snape in an afro. They kept waking up so that they could laugh.
Breakfast, the next day:
"NOW!!" All three boys said to James.
James mumbled something under his breath and immeadatly Snape's hair started to frizz. It was highly comical because the hair wanted to fizz but the grease kept pulling it down. Suddenly little white lice sprung out of the hair and with magically magnified voices, they began to sing:
"At first we were afraid,
We were petrified.
Kept thinking we could never live without you by our sides.
But then we spent so many nights just thinking how you did us wrong,
And we grew strong
And we learned how to get along.
So now your back
from the storage space
We just looked up to find you near,
putting that clean look upon his face
We should have hid you with a lock,
We should have dirtied up his knee.
If we'd have known for just one second,
You'd free him of acne.
Aww Now go!
Spill to the floor
Just go right down now
cause your not useful anymore
Weren't you the one who tried to cleanse him with your tries-"
Snape had run out of the room and carried his lice with him. The entire hall burst out laughing. Even Dumbledore himself was grinning.
The rest of the year passed in the same fashion. Although Snape never dared taunt any Gryfinndor about propler wizarding feeling.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~
A/N: the lice's song was supposed to be sung to I Will Survive, which, by the way, I DON'T own! soo did you like it? I plan on writing a fic that holds my real feelings on this topic but this is just kinda a joke. Should I Continue? review and tell me. please. pretty please. Ok I know the title didn't come into play here but I just felt that if I included that I would have to include all this other stuff and to me, this seems like a long chapter. And I know Lily wasn't really a major character right now but she will be i promise.