There's a Ghost on the Condor

A Star Wars nut production

Authoress Note: To all twelve(ish) people reading The Hylian League, sorry that I haven't updated yet but I've been really busy. Hopefully, I'll have something soon, though. In the meantime, I thought I'd write you a Halloween fic. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Storm Hawks or any characters or places related to Storm Hawks. This is a work of fanfiction. Any resemblance to persons living, dead, or nonexistent (aside from the ones from Storm Hawks) is purely coincidental. Beaky and Rose belong to Narrator01, who I hope will forgive me for using her characters without permission.

Here goes...

It was movie night on the Condor. The Storm Hawks were taking a break from saving Atmos to watch a movie. They did this every other week. They would all take turns picking movies (aside from Stork, who didn't care, as he was usually too busy flying the ship, and Radarr, who had yet to suggest a movie with an intelligible title), and this week, it was Finn's turn. This week, he had picked a horror movie called The Creepy Psycho Killer with a Chainsaw and a Hook Returns From the Grave. The movie was creepy enough, but the fact that the weather was really stormy definitely heightened the dramatic tension.

"No, you idiot!" Finn shouted to the projector screen, "Don't go into the engine room! The killer's in there!" Piper scowled at the sharpshooter, "Finn, you know he can't hear you, right?" Finn shrugged, "I know that, but he's still an idiot!"

"Calm down, Finn," said Aerrow, "It's just a... Eww." He said this because the idiot who went into the engine room had just got all of his limbs cut off with the killer's chainsaw. Junko, who was hiding behind the couch, stuck his head up briefly and asked, "Is it over yet?" Then he saw the blood on the screen and shouted, "HOLY SMURF!" before going back into hiding behind the couch.

About forty-five minutes later in the movie, the killer had killed everybody. He climbed on a skimmer and flew off, and the screen read "THE END?" Suddenly, the screen went blank. Piper rolled her eyes, "Clever. They creep us out with the killer getting away, then they pull a fake cutoff. Any second now the credits will start."

"Piper, did you have to ruin it?" protested Finn. The Storm Hawks waited for the credits to start, but the credits didn't start.

"Uhh, guys?" said Aerrow nervously, "Did anyone turn off the projector while we weren't looking?" Everyone shook their heads. Suddenly Junko shouted, "It's the ghost of the creepy psycho killer with a chainsaw and a hook!"

"No it's not," said Piper, "I'm sure it was just some power glitch. Any second now it'll turn back on." She looked around at them all, then said, "Well, I'm off. I found another old Condor ship's log, and I'm going to get some reading in. Night!" With that, she left, and Finn said, "Wouldn't it be awesome if the ghost of the creepy psycho killer with a chainsaw and a hook was actually on the ship?"

"No it wouldn't!" shouted Junko, his voice cracking. Aerrow stood up and said, "Relax Junko. There is no real ghost of a creepy psycho killer with a chainsaw and a hook. It's just a movie."

"Oh," said Junko, calming down, "Okay." Aerrow left the room, and Finn, seeing an opportunity, snuck up behind Junko and shouted, "BOO!" Junko screamed then ducked down and covered his head in his hands, while Finn burst out laughing.

"Finn!" Junko shouted, "That was not funny!"

"Yeah it was!" Finn was still laughing.

Meanwhile, Piper was sitting in her room with the door open, reading an old ship's log. She saw Aerrow walk by and said, "Hey, Aerrow, can I show you something?" The Sky Knight shrugged and said, "Sure," before walking in and finding a place to sit down.

"Look at this," said Piper, pointing to a paragraph in the logbook. It read:

13-13: A creepy man with a chainsaw and hook was found on the ship. We caught him and threw him into the Wastelands, although he did put up a good fight. Beaky thinks he was a Cyclonian assassin, but everyone else thinks the guy was probably just insane. In other news, our communicator bill has gone way up. It's like someone's making calls when we're not looking. My guess is that someone here has a new girl or boyfriend.

"That's weird," said Aerrow, "I mean, we just finish watching a scary movie, then we find this entry. It's kind of..."

"Oddly coincidental?" asked Piper, "Yeah, I was thinking the same thing." The Sky Knight and navigator sat there thinking for a moment, then Aerrow said, "Just don't let Finn or Junko know." Piper nodded agreement.

A few minutes after Aerrow had gone, Piper had gone to the bathroom, and Finn just so happened to be walking by her room. He saw a book lying on her bed and snuck in to read it, on the off chance that it was a diary. As Finn read, his eyes widened in a combination of fear and excitement.

"Here?... No way!... With something like that... There has to be a ghost... This is so awesome!" He left the room almost bouncing with excitement. Suddenly, the power went out.

"What the?" yelled Finn, tripping on air and falling flat on his face in front of the bathroom door. Piper then came out and tripped over him. Aerrow came over there to see what was happening and just stopped short of tripping over Piper, who was picking herself up.

"What's going on?" Aerrow asked. Piper sounded nervous, "I don't know."

"It's the ghost of the psycho killer that got chucked into the Wastelands!" Finn shouted excitedly. Piper turned toward the sound of Finn's voice and was about to chew him out when they heard a loud scream that could only belong to...

"Junko!" they all gasped at once. Aerrow, Finn and Piper all dashed for the living room, only to see Junko curled up on the floor in front of the projector, panting.

"What happened, buddy?" Finn asked nervously. Junko looked up at Finn, "Well, a little after you left, the power went out. I was freaked out, so I decided to find a flashlight. As I was looking, I saw a light. I realized that it was coming from the projector screen, and when I looked, there was a picture of the psycho killer with a chainsaw and a hook up on the screen!"

"And that's when you screamed," added Aerrow unnecessarily. Junko nodded. Meanwhile, Piper, upon hearing the story, had checked the projector.

"That's odd," she said, "if it was on, even for a second, it should be warm. This feels like it's been off for a while." Finn smiled widely and exclaimed, "This. Is. So. Awesome!"

"Finn!" scolded Piper, "There might be something serious going on here and all you can say is 'this is so awesome'?"

"I thought you didn't believe in the ghost of the creepy psycho killer with a chainsaw and a hook," said Finn teasingly.

"I don't, but..."

"Hey guys," Aerrow interrupted the argument, "Has anyone seen Stork or Radarr recently?" Finn and Piper looked at each other, scared, then looked at Aerrow, shaking their heads in unison.

"Oh man!" groaned Finn. Piper looked at him and said, "Good, you finally realize that..."

"The good-looking comic relief guy is always killed off first!" Finn said, panicking, "The ghost's gonna come after me!" Piper went back to glaring at Finn, and Aerrow said, "Well, whatever is here on the ship, I say we get rid of it. We'll stick together and search the ship. Let's start with the bridge. Who knows? Stork and Radarr might be there."

The group walked onto the bridge, only to find that it was deserted. No one was there, and all the lights were off.

"Anyone else think this is kinda creepy?" Finn asked. Junko's voice cracked as he asked, "Kinda?" Suddenly, everyone could hear a quiet, but growing in volume, bzzzzzzzzz. Junko screamed and started to run around in circles, which caused Aerrow to shout, "Junko! Calm down." Junko stopped in his tracks and came dangerously close to hyperventilating. Suddenly Finn let out a shriek. A pair of hands had speared out of the darkness and were dragging him off. Aerrow immediately grabbed Finn and pulled back, but the hands were too strong. As Finn was dragged off, his yells decreased in volume until Aerrow, Piper, and Junko were left with an eerie silence.

"Well," said Piper, breaking the silence, "there's no more point in looking around in here. Let's try the engine room."

"Anywhere but the engine room!" Junko yelled, "there's always something bad in the engine room!" Aerrow nodded, seeing Piper's point, and said, "Exactly."

The remainder of the Storm Hawks were more than a little unnerved as they entered the engine room. The room was much more sinister-looking than the bridge, especially with the lights off. Also, it was strange to not have Finn with them, as if there was a Finn-shaped indent in the air where the sharpshooter was supposed to be. But as they entered the engine room, nothing seemed off until they heard a thud. Junko, who was now even more jumpy asked, "What was that?"

"I don't know," said Aerrow, "but I'm going to go check it out. Piper, come with me. Junko, you wait by the door and yell if you see anything coming."

"A-alone?" asked Junko, trembling, "but what if..."

"Would you rather go deeper into the engine room?" Piper asked. Junko let out a little "eep!" and shook his head vigorously. Aerrow smiled and reassured Junko, "Don't worry, we'll be fine, and we'll find out what's really going on." Aerrow and Piper walked into the darkness and started looking for the source of the noise, leaving Junko trembling by the door.

The two had gone deep into the room when they heard it: a long, drawn-out scream, which cut off suddenly. Aerrow and Piper looked at each other and said simultaneously, "Junko!" before running back towards the entrance. But when they got there, the space where the Wallop had been standing was empty. All that was there was a shiny bolt.

Aerrow and Piper left the engine room quickly and decided to search the halls. First, though, they had stopped by the garage and picked up one of Aerrow's energy blades. Aside from protecting them, the crystal-powered blade also provided the two with light. Now they were wandering the hallways, Piper in front, with Aerrow carrying the energy blade behind her. Piper thought that she saw something and walked forward quickly, the light dimming behind her. She turned around and asked, "Aerrow, could you bring the light closer?" There was no response. Piper now noticed that the light was gone.

"Aerrow?" Once again there was no answer. Piper took deep breaths, trying to calm herself down. This can't be happening, she thought to herself, There is no way...

Piper... This was not Piper thinking, this was a whisper that reverberated around the hallways.

Piper... The navigator looked around, desperately trying to find whoever was talking. "Who are you?" she asked.

You should know, the voice said, you read all about me. Come to the bridge. There, all will be revealed. Piper tensed up. She wasn't sure what she should do, but she knew that if she went to the bridge, it would be about the dumbest thing she could possibly do. But then again, answers to what was going on would really help. Piper thought for a second, then headed for the bridge.

The bridge was still dark when she got there, but it seemed more sinister somehow.

"Hello?" she said, "I'm here. Where are you?"

"I'm right behind you!" the voice from earlier yelled. Piper turned around to see a menacing figure wearing a mask standing behind her. The figure raised a large chainsaw up and headed right toward her. Piper screamed at the top of her lungs.

Suddenly the lights came on and Piper heard the sound of laughter. She looked up at the figure with the chainsaw and, seeing green skin, asked, "Stork?" The carrier pilot put down his fake chainsaw and took off his mask, smiling like he'd never smiled before. Radarr came out from behind a chair and climbed up on Stork's shoulder.

"We got all of you good," said the Merb with satisfaction.

"All of us?" Piper asked, then she noticed that Aerrow, Finn and Junko were sitting at the table, laughing.

"So this whole thing was a prank?" the navigator asked, puzzled. Stork nodded and explained, "I've got a remote for the projector. It was easy to turn it off at the end of the movie. I also turned off the power from here. I also turned the projector on for a split second, just long enough for Junko to see the face of the killer. Then, when you four came into the bridge, I grabbed Finn."

Finn went on, "As soon as you left, Stork told me about the prank. Of course, I decided to get in on it. When you three went into the engine room, Radarr knocked a wrench off of a pipe. When you and Aerrow went to check it out, I came to Junko and told him about the prank. I got him to yell so you would hear it, then we left."

Then Aerrow went on, "When we were searching the halls, Radarr came up and told me to follow him, but not to let you know. I figured out what was happening and went along. When I got to the bridge, Stork started talking to you over the PA. We got you to come to the bridge, and you know what happened then."

"So, this whole thing was a prank?" Piper repeated.

"Yeah," said Aerrow, "wasn't it fun!" Piper shook her head. She would never understand boys. Then she thought of something.

"Stork?" she asked. When he looked at her, she continued, "How did you know about the killer that the original Storm Hawks threw into the Wastelands?"

"What?" Stork asked, "I didn't know about that." Aerrow shrugged, "Just a weird coincidence, I guess."

But was it?

Authoress note: Well, that's it. How was it? Did you like it? Loathe it? Let me know in a review!

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