Disclaimer: I DO NOT own any of the Red vs Blue characters. They all belong to RoosterTeeth.

Also, if you don't like stories where fictional characters come to the real world, than don't read.

I stared at the armor clad man. He stared back. Or, at least, I think he did. I couldn't exactly tell, with that golden, gleaming visor covering his face. He shifted his weight, and the sun caught the plating of his helmet just right, casting a bright light directly at my face. I squinted as tears sprang to my eyes, and quickly held up a hand to shield myself from the glare. I had to block out about half of his face to completely eradicate the gleam from my eyes, but it would do. There wasn't much for me to see anyway, because I knew these outfits. I knew what they looked like. I'd seen them before. Leaning to my right, I peered around the soldier, blinking as eight other identical face plates turned to follow my movements. My eyes shifted from one to another, inspecting the armor that went with each visor as well. Yep. They were all here. I sighed, bringing a hand up to my cheek in exasperation. My eyebrows were in danger of disappearing behind my short, boy-cut hair, as they rose higher up my brow.

"Umm…" I mumbled, for the umpteenth time, at a loss for what to do.

"Well?" The cobalt clad man in front of me asked. I looked back up at his face, wondering briefly what he looked like under his uniform, before returning to the matter at hand.

"I really don't know what to do," was the only reply I could muster, knowing it was very unhelpful, and feeling stupid for it. What was I supposed to do? What could I do? I shuffled the pack of coke I'd been holding to the opposite hand, becoming quite uncomfortable with the whole situation.

The two teams had arrived suddenly, surprising me when I walked out of the local Kroger to find them all standing near my car. Unfortunately for me – or maybe fortunately, I couldn't tell yet – I was the first person to notice, or at least approach them, though, in hindsight, I wished I had stayed at a distance until my car was safely out of their eyesight, and I could sneak to it and drive away. But now I was stuck talking to this man in the cobalt armor, who claimed he was Church. The Church. Church from the popular web series Red vs. Blue. Of course I didn't believe him, but I couldn't help but wonder what he was doing here, along with all the other characters I knew so well, being a big fan of the series myself. As Church questioned me, though, I started to think that besides the whole impossibility of them being real, they might be able to actually be who they said they were. They had no idea where they were, or what time period it was, or any of that. The only information they had been positive of, was that the last thing they'd done was go through a teleporter. We'd discussed why they might be here, Grif once suggesting that they'd obviously been sent back in time, or to a parallel universe. Everyone else dismissed that idea, though I figured it was more probable than any of the others anyone else had come up with so far. And now I was stuck, standing in the hot August sun with a 12-pack of coke in my hands, trying to help nine supposedly fictional characters decide what they should do about their dilemma.

"Um… well… do you see anything around here that might teleport you back to where you came from?"

All nine of the Spartans looked around, and so did I, though we'd already done so more than once already, with no luck. Tucker was obviously thinking this, because he piped up with, "Of course there isn't. If we're back on Earth, in the year 2008, like you say we are, then there isn't going to be a fucking teleporter anywhere."

"Shut up, Tucker." Church retorted.

"The blue is right," Sarge spoke up in his heavy drawl. "There must be some teleportation mechanism here somewhere, if we got here by one."

Grif took up Tucker's side. "Well, maybe our teleporter got screwed up, and sent us here by accident. If that's what happened, there wouldn't be one here."

"Of course it got screwed up, dirtbag, or we wouldn't be here," Sarge joined in once more.

"Maybe we have been sent on vacation. Or to save the planet, like in movies," Caboose added, excited to contribute to the conversation.

"Shut up, Caboose," Church growled, without even looking back.

Throughout the whole exchange, I just stared in wonder. These were either people dressed as these characters and they were doing an excellent job with impersonation, I was going mad, or it really was them. I ruled out the last one, and hoped it wasn't the second. The first was a little creepy, but how would I know?

"Um, guys?" came my mumble after a couple minutes, trying to break through their arguing.

"What?" some asked at once, the rest remained silent, but they all turned and looked at me. Never one for the center of attention, especially with strangers (and potentially famous ones at that), a blush crept into my ears and started to spread through my face. I hoped none of them noticed.

By now, I had seen a few people glancing our way. One kid, looking to be in his early teens, started to make his way over at one point, but seemed to think better of it, and turned around. Others just stood and stared, before finally walking away, wide-eyed or shaking their head, dumbfounded. Nonetheless, I didn't want to attract any more attention, and this rainbow of suits that the characters were wearing was definitely an eye-catcher. "Do… do you guys have anything to wear besides that armor. It's kind of attracting a lot of attention." Before any of them could add anything about that being a good thing, I added, "And you probably don't want that. If people see you in those, they'll think you guys are crazy or threatening or something, and make a huge deal of it."

"You didn't make a big deal of it," Simmons pointed out.

"Well, no… I don't like to make big deals about much of anything so… I'd rather keep this kind of on the down-low, you know?"

"Sure…" Grif said, and I could tell he still didn't really understand why anyone would make a big deal of it anyway. I didn't even think I could really explain to them why we didn't walk around covered in armor like they did. I just hoped the others would at least go along with it, and he would follow.

"So, do you guys - "

"And girls," Tex corrected me.

" – and girls… have anything else to wear, or, like, something under your armor that will do?"

"Well, yeah, of course we have stuff on under our armor." Church said.

Sarge added, "We wouldn't go around naked under these. That would chafe something awful. Except maybe Grif and Donut, they might do it, since Grif is stupid like that and Donut is well… Donut."

"I don't -" Grif started to retort.

"Believe me, it does chafe," Donut agreed, interrupting Grif.

Caboose seemed to ponder the exchange for a minute then said, "I do not think so."

We all looked at Caboose, another shade of red starting to creep over my face with just the mention. Caboose had always been my favorite character, and now here he was, perhaps implying that he was naked under his armor. I shifted my eyes away, feeling weird despite the fact he was still fully clothed.

"Caboose, you do have something on under those, right?" Church asked condescendingly.

Caboose leaned in close to Church and said in a whisper, still loud enough for all of us to hear, "Yes. I am wearing my underwear."

"Oh, thank God," I heard Grif say in the back.

I suppressed a giggle by biting my lower lip, as Church turned back to me. "Is that good enough?"

"Well, I suppose so. I mean, not for public obviously, but till we get to my house, it'll be fine."

"Your house?"

"Well, yeah, I figured I could take you guys to my house, and we could figure out from there what to do, instead of standing here… in the Kroger parking lot." I didn't know what I'd accomplish by getting them out of public, but I felt I needed to. The idea of them being just people in costume kept getting farther and farther away from the front of my mind; I was enjoying playing along with this, and felt that they were almost my responsibility now, as if I was the reason they'd come here. "If that's ok with y'all, of course."

Church turned around, looking at the group for suggestions.

"Well, I say let's go! I mean, what other choice do we have?" Sister asked, looking around at all the others.

"Not one that I can think of," Tex answered.

Donut joined in. "Well, we could stay here and look for the teleporter some more."

"That fucking thing isn't here, I tell you!" Tucker yelled angrily at the pink Spartan.

"How will we get home then?"

"How the fuck do I know, Red?"

"Donut, Blue, stop your bickering. This is no time for that love-talk. You can do that later." Sarge interrupted.

Disgusted, Tucker started to retort, but was quickly cut off by Church. "Enough! Let's just go to this kid's house. We'll discuss all this there. Everybody, got it?"

The others stood around, some, like Sarge, agreed right away, the others waited a minute, but after some forcing from Church and Sarge, soon agreed also. Caboose, instead of agreeing, whined, "I am hot. It is making me all sweaty."

"Yeah, me too. Ugh," Donut agreed, lifting his arms as if to air himself out, though I didn't think it'd work well with that armor on.

"Well, how are we getting to your house then?" Church ignored them, turning to me.

I hadn't thought about it until now, but now that I did, I was unsure. I turned to look at my small white Honda Accord, and each of the others turned to look too. Following my gaze, they spotted the white car.

"That won't work."

"You're right, Simmons. Grif, you'll have to ride on top of the car. Avoid falling off if you can. If you do fall off, don't try to follow us."

"I'm not riding on top of that!"

Shaking my head, I stopped them from continuing, "No, no one is going to ride on top. You can't really anyway, it's illegal. I'll just have to make several trips back here to get you guys."

"First!" called Tucker.

"Damn it, Tucker. Second!" Church immediately spouted. Caboose ended up with third, and Grif would have gotten fourth, if Sarge hadn't pulled rank on him, making him give up his spot.

"Alright. I, uh… I guess you will have to take off your armor to fit in the car. Three of you won't fit in the back, otherwise," I suggested, not knowing what to do with the armor. The four getting first ride agreed, and started to take off their outfits. The other that would have to wait, becoming hot in the Georgia heat, decided to take theirs off too.

Ever since I'd met them minutes ago, even though I doubted – and still sort of did – that they were the actual characters, I'd wanted to see what these people looked like under their armor. Finally I was getting to see if they'd look like what I thought they would, and I couldn't help but stare at each of them. I knew now I'd never know for certain if they were people just in costume, but I didn't care anymore. Church had his helmet off first, and I stared at his jet black, short cut hair. A ragged goatee had formed, and the rest of his face looked like it could use a shave too. Suddenly realizing I'd get to see what Caboose really looked like, I snapped my head over to him. He was having trouble with all the snaps it took to get off the helmet but as I watched, he struggled through, and finally pulled it off. My mouth fell open, and I felt my heart skip a beat. He was obviously not the brightest, this I knew, but he was cuter than I expected. His short blond hair was all in disarray after being in the helmet, and also pretty soaked with sweat, but I didn't mind. The young man was tanner than Church, though not as tan as I found Tucker to be, and he had brilliant dark blue eyes. He smiled a big, toothy grin as he caught me looking, and I glanced away, suddenly very self-conscious, and now definitely blushing. Tucker had very dark skin, and a light chocolate brown color of hair. His eyes were very dark too, and I guessed him to be perhaps of mixed racial background. Sarge looked like the standard old battle type, with the grey buzz cut hair, and a worn complexion. The rest all varied in their looks, the only one that surprised me was Donut, who didn't look quite as feminine as I'd imagined. His hair was a light blonde, and it would have been styled if it hadn't been messed up by the helmet. Yet, you could still tell he was a bit more effeminate then the others men. He even looked a tad more girly than Tex, who looked very tomboyish with her red hair cut in a short bob cut, with no make-up on and a very tough, battle-worn face.

Once the first four had their armor fully off (in which case I had to turn away quickly when my eyes caught sight of Caboose just standing there in a pair of blue boxers and a plain white t-shirt), I opened the trunk, not knowing what else to do with all the armor. After shoving four of the outfits in, there was no room left for the helmets, with the armor itself barely fitting. I struggled a few minutes to close the trunk, but once it was obvious I couldn't get it, Church came over and slammed it down. I wondered how good that would be for my car, but I figured it'd have to do.

"Well, alright," I said, looking at all the soldiers, now only in their clothes, which mainly consisted of some sort of form-fitting under armor outfit, or just underwear, in Caboose's case. "I guess the rest of you can go sit on one of the benches over there or something till I come back for y'all. Just… don't wander off, or do anything stupid. If you don't know what something is, or don't understand something, just leave it alone. I don't want any trouble."

"She sounds like Church when he tells me not to do something stupid," I heard Caboose lean over to Sarge and whisper.

"Alright, but how long is it going to take you to get back? It's getting really hot out here, and I'm tired of standing around," Grif complained, running a hand over his sweaty face.

"I'll… be back as soon as I can," was all I could think to say, as I opened my door. Pushing the driver's seat forward, I wished that my car wasn't only two-doors. It would have been easier to get the soldiers in, seeing as most were pretty tall, or muscular, and seemed to have a difficult time crawling into my backseat. Sarge insisted on sitting in front, making Tucker, Church, and Caboose, sit in back.

As Sarge and I went to get in the car Sarge looked back and said, "Simmons, take care of Donut. If Grif gets hurt don't help him. Unless you're helping him die. Then by all means, give it your best."

"Yes, sir," Simmons commended with a salute, and with that Sarge sat down in the passenger seat, and closed the door.

I stood there for a second, not knowing if I should say anything else, before giving the rest just standing there a slight wave, and pulling my door shut behind me. As I started the car and buckled myself in, I watched as the five Spartans still here started to walk back to the grocery store. Once they were out of my way, I put the car in reverse, and started to back out.

"You're sure you're old enough to drive this thing?" Sarge asked.

"Yeah, you do seem sort of young," Church threw in.

Putting the car in drive, I glanced over at Sarge. "Well, yeah. I have my driver's license if you want to see it." I pointed towards my red wallet with the Switzerland cross on it that was sitting on the console, and continued driving.

Before Sarge could have a chance to pick up the wallet, Tucker, who was sitting in the middle seat in the back, snatched it up, saying, "Let me see that." He opened it up, revealing my plethora of one dollar bills that I always seemed to have on me, some gift cards, one debit card, a few gas cards, and my license.

Suddenly remembering who I was dealing with, I glanced up at my rearview mirror, to catch Tucker counting the money stashed in one of the pockets. "Don't you dare take my money." I heard Tucker mumble something about how I couldn't do anything to him, but he did put the money back. Why he decided to have some morale for once, I didn't know, but I was glad.

"Good color choice with the wallet by the way. It's very attractive," Sarge complemented, and I chuckled slightly, wondering if their battle of red vs. blue would ever stop.

"Oh, so your name's Mariah Ashley Yori, eh?" Church asked from behind me. I knew they'd found my license, and that's when I forgot that I'd never even introduced myself. It made me feel better that they hadn't either, but I still felt rude, because I knew them already, even if they didn't know me. "We'll just call you Yori. We stick with last names. It's a lot less formal, so you don't have to feel like you're actually friends with anyone. You can just pretend you are acquaintances, or coworkers or something."

"Fine with me," I shrugged.

"I think the name Mariah is very nice," Caboose said.

I smiled. "Thanks."

The car fell into silence after that, and I was surprised. I didn't think of them as being exactly the quiet types, but there was probably a lot for them to think over, so it was understandable. Except for Caboose. I didn't know if he was thinking at all. Whether he was thinking or not, he did notice the cows, that we passed, promptly turning and shouting, "Cows!" in Tucker's ear.

"Yeah, Caboose, cows. That's great."

"Man, it's been a while since I've seen a cow," Church muttered, leaning around Tucker, as all the Spartans seemed to admire the ruminating animals.

"Well, we have plenty of those around here, so, you'll be seeing more of them." The Spartans went back to their sight-seeing, heads turning as something caught their eye that they hadn't seen in a long time. Pondering, I asked, "How long has it been since y'all have been on Earth anyway?"

"Oh, about 30 minutes," Caboose answered.

Church sighed, "No, Caboose. Not how long we've been here. How long it's been since we last saw Earth… before right now… or 30 minutes ago."

"Too damn long, that's for sure," Tucker grumbled.

The car ride didn't seem to take too long, and as I pulled up to my driveway, I started to slow down. "Um…" I mumbled. How would my mom take to me bringing four strange men into the house, only to go pick up three more and two women? Probably not well. I didn't know how I'd explain it either. I stopped at the driveway next to ours, looking down it. If you weren't looking for the driveway, you could probably miss it, that's how overgrown the trees and bushes surrounding it were. The house itself looked like it had been abandoned for years, which it practically had. Vines crawled up the sides of the small red shack, clinging to the wood and shingles. It wasn't very nice, but I figured if these soldiers could live in cement bases for months, they'd be fine in this run-down house, at least until I worked stuff out with my mom. I pulled my car slightly down the dirt and gravel driveway, parked it, and turned it off. Getting out, I told them they could go ahead and get out too, if they wanted, but to stay near the car. I listened as their boots crunched on dry leaves while I hopped over the wooden boards dividing this driveway and ours. I trotted over around the front of the house, to peer down the slope of the driveway to where my mom and stepdad parked their cars. Good. David's truck was gone, and hopefully, that meant mom was with him. To make sure, I went and peered in the front door, before unlocking it with my key and sticking my head in. I listened for a minute, before calling out, asking if anyone was home. When I got no answer, I sighed, feeling better, though I knew I'd still have to tell my mom sometime. For now, though, I was safe. I headed back over to the car, where the guys were milling around.

"- looks like crap."

"It's better than what we've been living in, Tucker."

"I don't know about that."

"Well, you could just go sleep out there in the woods if you want," I offered, waving towards the trees separating the run down little house and the neighbor's house as I walked up behind the Spartans. Stuffing my thumbs in the pockets of my cargo shorts I smiled wryly, wondering if Tucker would be up to the offer.

Church seemed to enjoy the suggestion too, and looked over at Tucker, a mocking grin spread over his lips.

"Well, I think you all can sleep out there." Sarge suddenly voiced, from where he stood a few yards away, inspecting the building. "It's not much, but it's red, so obviously it's a red base. And that means no blues. Y'all stay out, you hear."

Caboose took a quick step away from the house, as if he'd be shot down right there for being a blue. "He is right!"

"What!? No! He isn't right. I'm not sleeping outside when there is a house to sleep in. I don't care what color it is. Just get over that. Red and blue doesn't really matter here!" Church exclaimed. I almost threw in an "amen," but decided against it.

Tucker seemed to have suddenly changed his mind about the little house, because he threw in his own opinion. "Yeah, Church is right! We're sleeping in there. We'll fight you for it!" I almost asked him what happened to the "it looks like crap" but I knew it wouldn't make any difference.

"Yes, they will fight you for it!" Caboose shouted, and ran back over to stand behind me.

"And we have you outnumbered, Sarge," said Church.

Sarge halted his advancement, looking around him quickly. "Oh, fish chips he's right! You dirty blues, tricking me into being the first red to come here with y'all, alone, so you could kill me and take my house!"

"Um… but you didn't know about the house before," I added in.

"I might not have, but they did. They knew, and they knew it'd be mine, so they concocted this sinister – yet admittedly brilliant – plan."

I laughed, shaking my head. "You guys just calm down. We'll figure out sleeping arrangements once I have everyone back here. Now, no one kill or even so much as scratch anyone while I'm gone. You got that?"

Sarge looked shocked. "You can't leave me here with these blues. They're too crafty for me to take on alone. I'm not going to stay here with them."

"We don't want him here with us anyway," Tucker said, leaning against a tree.

From his position now beside me, Caboose drew himself up, almost puffing out his chest, as if trying to act intimidating. "Yes, we don't want us with him here anyway."

Church was about to say something, I could tell, but I cut him off. We'd wasted too much time, and I needed to get everyone back before my mom and stepdad got home. "Look, I don't have time for this. Church, Tucker, Caboose, don't do anything to Sarge. Sarge, don't do anything to them. You can go in the house if you want, but don't go in mine." I said this, pointing over to my family's yellow and green house. "Down there," I redirected my finger so it was pointing through the trees, away from the road, "is the lake. You can go down there, and go swimming or whatever, just don't go near my house. Got it?"

"Yeah, don't go near your house, got it," church sighed.

"Whatever, "Tucker mumbled, turning to stare at the run down little house they'd been fighting over.

"Yes, I've got it. Wait, what do I have?" Caboose asked, confused.

"Just stay with Church and Tucker," I laughed, looking up at him but immediately remembering his lack of clothes besides his underwear. My face burning again, I shifted my attention back to Sarge. "You understand?"

Looking shocked again, Sarge mumbled, "I can't believe you'd do this to me. You seemed like such a nice young fella'." He continued rambling as he watched the blues walk over to inspect the house, but I didn't stay to listen. I yelled an ignored "be good!" and started back to Kroger.

I was halfway back to Kroger when I realized what I'd forgotten to tell the guys. I had a dog. A small rat terrier to be exact, but I don't think the type of dog made any difference. The problem was that I didn't know if the guys had seen a dog in a long time, or even worse, ever. Scout, though not very large at all, especially compared to these Spartans, would definitely come off as something threatening or at least stand-offish, and I was worried about their reaction. Scout would start barking as soon as he realized they were there, and then…. I didn't know what they'd do. I hoped and prayed throughout the whole car ride that they would leave him alone, and vice versa. At one point, in desperation, I even thought about calling up church, but then I realized he didn't have a cell phone. None of them did, as far as I knew. I decided there in my car that after finding them all clothes, my next order of business would be to figure out a way to stay in touch with them. Seeing as they have no clue what's what on this planet I knew that communication would be key.

By the time I pulled back into the familiar setting of the Kroger parking lot I was frantic with worry about Scout. I quickly spotted the others, thankfully sitting and standing around a bench like I'd asked. I navigated my car in their direction, and pulled it up next to the curb in front them. Not even bothering to turn the car off, I sprang out of it, rushing around to where the others, having recognized me after a second, were getting up.

"Come on, come on," I called to them. "I need to be quick. Donut, you already have all your armor off, so you can come. I'll take two others."

"Why only three? Don't you have enough room in that car for four people?" Grif asked as he pulled the metal off from around his waist, revealing a flash of black under armor. I wondered why the others – except Donut – had taken off only half of their armor earlier. I shrugged, guessing they would have felt uncomfortable without something thicker than the spandex covering their lower halves. That made sense. Donut obviously felt fine with just the thin material, and probably would have still been fine even if this was one of those days where he walked around naked. I didn't want to think about that.

Stuffing Donut's armor in my trunk I answered back over my shoulder. "Because, I don't want to have to leave one of you here by yourself." I checked my watch. 4:45. I had about 45 minutes until mom got home from working out. I tried to relax myself momentarily, but then remembered Scout and became tense again. I looked at the five soldiers standing there, Simmons being the only one not done undressing. He stood uncomfortably, his armor half off. That's when I noticed the pieces of wiring and metal sticking out from his under armor. Small wires ran up the back of his neck, making his skin pucker where it entered it. A metal plate covered the lower half of his jaw, and other robot pieces shone awkwardly in random places along his body. I couldn't help my eyes widening again. There was no way that this was an imposter. These guys had to be real. I'd never seen a cyborg before, because they didn't exist. But here Simmons was, with all his parts and pieces, some human, others obviously not. Though not much was showing, it was enough to tell that what I saw was real. I smiled. These guys had to be who they said they were. That's the only explanation for a cyborg. I smiled up at Simmons, meeting his confused and slightly embarrassed green eyes. He tried to smile back, managing sort of a half of one, and that made me smile wider. They couldn't be people just acting. Excited that I was most likely actually meeting the real Spartans from Red vs. Blue I turned back to the others, my confidence renewed. "Hey, do you think you guys could fit 4 in the back. Maybe put the smallest of y'all back there? That way I don't have to come back."

Grif looked kind of confused and was staring at me, and I suddenly wondered if my staring at Simmons had been long and really noticeable. Thankfully Sister piped up, and drew my attention away from the Orange Spartan so that I wouldn't have time to become embarrassed.

"Yeah, I think we could. Me, Tex, and Donut can fit back there, definitely…. I don't know about my brother or Simmons."

Donut agreed as well as Tex, though she agreed much more reluctantly, and we turned to size up Grif and Simmons. Simmons was taller than Grif, yet he was lankier, with a thinner build. Grif was admittedly chubby. I wasn't the only one to notice this.

Donut laughed. "Um, I think I'd rather have Simmons back there. Grif, you might not fit so well."

Grif straightened up, unwittingly making his stomach stick out a little more. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means you're fat," Tex stated. I laughed, but then I remembered Scout again. The smile evaporated off my face, and I herded them to the car after stuffing their armor in the trunk. It was difficult for the two reds and the two girls to fit in the back, but, after a shove from Grif, they were packed in, and Grif nonchalantly climbed into the front seat.

I buckled myself in, trying to get the others to, but to no avail, and started to pull out of the parking lot.

"So, you guys, do you have dogs where you came from?"

By the time I had zoomed back into my driveway and parked the car, the four Spartans I'd dropped off earlier were nowhere in sight. I sighed, running a hand through my hair. Mom and David still weren't home, thank goodness, but I still had to get all of them settled – pretty much hidden – and give them a rundown of where they were.

As I had stood, head confusedly turning from side to side, trying to find Church, Tucker, Caboose, and Sarge the other soldiers had managed to pile out of my small car. Watching as Grif walked off, leaving his door open, I grumbled to myself and went and closed it. I had no idea what I'd gotten myself into, but it was already proving to be a pain.

"Um, are you going to tell us where we are?" came Grif's voice suddenly from behind me.

I turned around to look up into his hazel eyes. I think my look might have come off as sort of a glare, and I felt bad for it later, but I was suddenly feeling stressed with the whole situation. Grif raised an eyebrow at me. I could feel everyone else watching, either waiting for the same answer, or to see if I'd punch Grif's face in. All I said was, "This is my house." With that I turned on my heel, jumped over the barrier separating our driveway with the abandoned house's gravel drive, and quickly strode over to the old red house. I'd never really been over to the house before, but everything looked untouched. They weren't up here. I sighed louder this time, now running both hands through my hair.

A crunching of leaves told me that someone was walking up from behind me, but I didn't pay the noise any mind. I was trying to decide where to check first, and if I should leave the Spartans I was with here, or take them with me.

"Mariah, you look stressed. Perhaps we should do some yoga to unwind."

A bitter laugh escaped my lips and I turned to look at Donut. "No, no, I'm good. Really-"

Sister cut me off though as she trotted over to us. "Oh, yeah! I could go for some yoga! I mean, I've never done it before, but it always looked fun." She started doing some moves that seemed more like a bad cheerleading routine to me, lifting one leg up, then another, with a lot of jumping around. I couldn't help but smile at the antics, and when, suddenly, a shrill bark pierced the air, my smile widened from ear to ear.

Looking around frantically, I cried, "Scout!" and laughed excitedly when my small terrier came zooming around the house, still barking like mad. He ran up to me, only long enough for me to pat his back once, before he was zooming around, sniffing each of the others in turn. Donut let out a squeal almost as loud as Scout's, scaring me for a moment until I realized he was just excited about seeing the dog as I was. I laughed, and having calmed down some, was able to think a bit more clearly.

"Hey, Simmons, come with me!" I called over my shoulder to the young man dressed in the maroon and black under armor. I was already walking away, but it only took him a few long strides to catch up with me.

"Where are we going?"

"You're going to help me find Caboose, Tucker, Church, and Sarge. I'm not sure where they went off to, though I told them to stay here."

"Oh, alright."

We had already reached the bottom of my driveway when I remembered that I'd left all the others standing back up in the front of the house with no instructions. As I had just started cussing silently to myself, Donut came bouncing down the driveway, Scout at his heels.

"I want to come!"

I nodded to him, and yelled to the others that they could either come along, or stay right where they were. Everyone decided to follow; more out of boredom and curiosity about the surroundings than anything, except for Grif, but when he realized he would be left by himself, the chubby soldier came ambling down the driveway, trailing the rest of us. Now that I had the whole group following me I slowed my pace down to a power walk, though the only one who didn't keep up with me easily was Grif. As we walked I kept looking about, searching for any signs of the four men that I'd left earlier. The others didn't talk too much, and I guessed they were all a bit confused at the moment. I led them down the wood path that went to the lake, walking its distance in record time. When I had almost reached the stairs leading down from the raised wood path to the sand of the lake shore, I could hear voices, and quickly afterwards spotted the people talking. That's when my pace slowed, having successfully found the men.

They seemed to be enjoying themselves at the lake, taking a while to notice our approach. Sarge was standing gruffly in our motorboat, admiring it in the way that all men admire something they have no clue about – looking it over and giving it small approving nods every now and then, sometimes lightly touching something that looked new or interesting. Church was sitting on the walkway of the dock, watching as Tucker and Caboose splashed around in the water, Tucker trying to rinse the grime off of himself, while Caboose tried to initiate a splashing game. I could have almost sworn that a small smile flickered across Church's face as he watched them, but his character wasn't known for friendliness or compassion, so I tossed the thought aside. He was first to notice us, and alerted the other three to our presence by calling a greeting to us as we walked across the shore to the dock.

Donut, of course, was first to greet the others, instantly running into the water and joining Caboose in his game. The feminine boy's arrival drove Tucker out of the water, and he walked out of the shallows, crossing his arms across his chest as he walked up to us. He was no longer wearing his under armor (I could see it lying on the dock), but instead wore only the boxers and the undershirt that had been his bottom-most layer.

"It's about time y'all got here. Took you long enough," he drawled out, and I could tell he was shivering. He stopped to flirt with Tex, and I continued to the dock. Everyone else dispersed as well, Tex walking up the shore a little way with Tucker at her heels, Simmons walking to the dock with me, and Grif, just now reaching the shore, made it to the dock after a minute, dropping into a chair next to the one Simmons had sat down in.

For a few minutes I watched Caboose and Donut from the spot I had chosen next to Church on the walkway, and then I turned to him, glad that he'd only unzipped the top half of his under armor. "What do you guys need first? I know you need some clothes… how long's it been since you've eaten?"

At this Church let out a short, mocking laugh. "It depends on what your idea of a meal is. I probably haven't actual food in… oh, maybe two years or so."

"What? Why?" I wrinkled my eyebrows, looking back out to the water but awaiting Church's answer still.

"Eh. We ran out of real food at base after about a year there. And since they wouldn't send us more, we just had to deal with what we could get."

I nodded my head in surprise. Food and clothes were definitely top priority then.

But first I had to explain all this to mom.

I sighed for what seemed like the millionth time that afternoon, and my chin sank down to rest in my hands as I searched for a good reason to tell mom as to why I'd brought all these people home.