Summary: The Shinigami Women's Association needs to raise some money. Good that someone came up with the ingenious idea of making a calendar of the Association members, right? Right? Nanao doesn't think so.

Rating: K+

Disclaimer: Bleach belongs to Tito Kube. I know it, you know it, let's get on with my abduction of his characters.

Timeline: This could be anytime before Aizen's betrayal, I guess.

AN: Well, I'm kinda back for the holidays. I was buying a new calendar for the New Year and suddenly this story popped into my head. A nice one-shot to get me back into writing. Here you go and enjoy…

The Calendar

"What we need is to get the money somehow!" The voice of one Matsumoto Rangiku supplied sweetly.

Yes, that was exactly what they needed. Nanao mused. For whatever reason, the Shinigami Women's Association was low on money. Don't misunderstand, they were still by far in plus and had more than hundred times as much as the Shinigami Men's Association, which didn't say much in Nanao's estimation, but they didn't have enough to sponsor the big project that they had planned in the Rukongai on understanding between Shinigami and Rukongai residents especially children. They wanted to get a few more recruits for the Academy.

Every few years they would acquire a very ambitious project, one just like this and would do fabulously thanks to the dedicated members of the Association but this project especially, was important and… costly and it seemed as if they didn't have enough money to support it.

Nanao sighed. She knew that they needed to raise the money but she simply couldn't come up with an idea that would bring in the big sum that they needed. Maybe it was because she was overworked. She was, no doubt about that but nothing would work in her Division if she did not do it.

"Maybe we can get a sponsor, like Kuchiki-taicho." Kotetsu Isane ventured forth slowly and they looked at Rukia.

"Well, he would do it, I think." The quite-taken-by-surprise Shinigami said slowly.

"No! No. No. No. We can't do that! We're the Shinigami Women's Association; we can't ask the men for help!" Rangiku said swiftly with conviction. "We can't just ask for money from the men, we have to earn it!"

Nanao had to agree with Rangiku on that. That was why the Women's Association flourished while the Men's Association met in bathrooms. They had determination. They had grit. They had sheer stubbornness.

Nanao looked at her President and saw the smallish looking girl with the bright pink hair contemplate the matter, actually seriously. The project was important to everyone.

The other board members of the Association sat in silence after Rangiku's outburst, also thinking about a solution. Nanao looked at the serious faces of one Soi Fon-taicho to her left. The always quite angry taicho looked at the wall as if it held the solution to this problem. Unohana-taicho sat with her fukutaicho, Kotetsu Isane and her sister Kiyone at the table talking quietly. Hinamori Momo was sitting next to the sisters and Kurotsuchi Nemu sat next to Hinamori, and Nanao could swear she could actually hear all of Nemu's brain cells jumping, looking for a solution. Kuchiki Rukia and Matsumoto Rangiku, the other board members conferred quietly too.

Nanao, as Vice President and Kusajishi Yachiru as President of the Women's Association were equally thinking about the matter.

One silent hand was raised.

"Yes, Nemu-san?" Nanao asked politely.

"What if we aim for another calendar? It was quite obvious that the idea was a very good one and garnered a lot of attention last year. We would of course need a better strategy this time."

Everyone got thinking about that. The calendar of the men of the Gotei13 had truly gotten a lot of attention. No doubt about that. But…

"It is not a bad idea, in general, but it would not amass the amount we need", Nanao started, "Also, all the effort would not be worth it in the end. The photographs would be of amateur quality, as I have pointed out the last time we had this discussion and while it would generate a very good response from the female Shinigami to see the high-ranking officers of the Gotei13 in a calendar, somehow it would still be like we could not accomplish this feat on our own, without the men directly involved." Nanao ended her long deduction.

That got everyone silent again.

Then Yachiru clapped happily into her hands.

"That's it! That's it! We just use our own pictures and the men will buy our calendars, with our pictures in it! That way it's our effort, our women and we'll let the men pay for the product!" She finished happily and sprang from her perch on the table, signalling the discussion was closed.

"What, wait! President. What do you mean with our pictures?" Hinamori Momo asked hesitantly.

"We're going to produce a calendar for next year of the high-ranking female officers of the Gotei13!"

oooxooo

Nanao did not like that idea. Did not like it at all. Not one bit!

"And who is supposed to be in this calendar? We do not have enough high-ranking female officers to fill in 12 months." Nanao tried to get everyone's minds away from this absurd idea.

"Pfft. No Problem, vice president," little Yachiru started, "some will just have two months then!" She said happily. Was there ever an occasion when the little hyper active pink ball of cotton was not happy? Nanao doubted it.

"We have you, and Boobs (aka Rangiku), Braid Lady (Unohana) and her little follower (Isane), Hinamori, Angry Lady (Soi Fon), Loud (Kiyone) and Little (Rukia) and of course me!" She said exuberantly.

That made Nanao start, "Y-you?" That seemed a bit…strange.

"I thought this calendar was supposed to be for…grown-ups?" Nanao tried to say it as delicately as possible.

Yachiru just blinked, "Of course it will be but I want a picture too!" And stamped a foot petulantly. "With lots of candy in it, too!" A~lright. So she wanted a cutesy picture; that put Nanao's mind at rest. So maybe there was hope here.

"What if someone does not wish to be in this calendar?" Nanao asked stiffly.

"But, but it's for our project!" Yachiru started, her lower lip pouting cutely. She just bet that it worked famously well on Zaraki-taicho.

Nanao couldn't say anything against that. It was difficult to oppose something that she wanted but would the price be too high? They had spoken of doing "sensual pictures" and while Nanao wasn't entirely sure what she was supposed to understand under that term, she knew it would involve at least some nudity. And she would not, simply would not be ogled in a calendar by the whole of Sereitei! Not to mention her taicho. Her taicho! Nanao suddenly sat bolt upright. Oh, that lazy man would surely love this calendar. A great deal. She could just imagine his infernal smirk when he got to see her picture and Nanao knew with a sinking feeling that this calendar would happen. Even she had to admit that it was too good an idea and the money would be enough, hopefully.

Nanao closed her eyes and took a deep breath - this was going to be horrible.

oooxooo

"I don't understand why we have to be in a "sensual" pose!" Nanao fumed to Rangiku on the day of the shooting.

"Don't worry, Nanao, there won't be full frontal nudity, just a bit of naughtiness. We still have our reputations to consider, at least some of you do." Rangiku said happily and started to take off her clothing.

oooxooo

"Nanao-ch~an." The deep baritone of her captain intoned directly in front of her desk. Nanao had desperately tried to not acknowledge him but it was no use, he had plopped down in front of her desk until he was bracing his head on his arms until he was level with her and looked at her with a devilish glint in his eyes.

"You've been keeping secrets, my naughty Nanao-chan." He said with said glint.

Nanao was in a bad mood to begin with, to say the least. She was overworked, stressed, was not able to sleep properly lately and her lazy captain managed to annoy her even more! The photos were on her mind constantly. She had seen them last week and she thought she looked too… un-Nanao-like in it. Thankfully she had weaselled her way out of doing more than one. To be honest she was scared and Nanao hated to be scared. It made her too tense.

"To what might you be implying, taicho? And do not call me Nanao-chan." She said politely but with steel in her voice, not looking up from her papers. She knew exactly what he was asking about but Nanao didn't have the patience to deal with him now. She was desperately trying to get the blush that had suddenly risen to her cheeks away. She had not been able to look at her taicho since she had had the photos taken, which was annoying her to no end. She was always cool and collected around him, had to be but this was such an awkward situation and she was out of her depth, to be truthful.

She concentrated on her paperwork again. Just a few more and she could have that soak in the tub she had promised herself and which had brought her through the whole day.

"I have heard this most delicious little rumour that the Shinigami Women's Association are going to do a photo shooting of some of its members for a calendar for next year."

"Then you would be wrong, taicho." Nanao said softly, still not acknowledging but noticing the hurt puppy look in his eyes.

"But- but, why not?" He was really quite devastated.

Nanao sighed, signing the last sheet of paper and putting it into a neat pile. This was it. Finished. Thank the gods.

She stood and saw her taicho do the same, who now towered over her slight frame. It made her stomach flutter to think of all that maleness but would of course not acknowledge it, like she never did.

Nanao looked up at her taicho and saw the look on his face and sighed. What could it hurt if she told him? While walking around him and heading for the door, she started talking without looking at him.

"As a fact, the photos are already taken and the calendar is finished."

She heard her taicho suck in a breath.

"And might my most beauteous Nanao-chan be in it too?"

"Find out for yourself, Kyoraku-taicho," and slid the door quietly closed behind her.

Well, that wasn't too bad, she concluded.

She didn't know that she had just opened a can of worms.

oooxooo

Shunsui didn't know what to say to that. Couldn't really, since his little fukutaicho was already gone, now. This is definitely getting interesting, he thought with a smirk. His Nanao-chan, proper, diligent Nanao-chan was going to be in a naughty calendar, from what he had heard. This was good. Too good. He had never even considered thinking up a scenario like this. This was unheard of.

The Women's Association showed initiative, they would show Nanao in their calendar. He had no doubt about that. Not only was Nanao among the highest-ranking Shinigami in the Gotei13, she was also beautiful. They would definitely try to get Nanao into the calendar. While he could imagine Nanao not wanting to do this, she would cave in the end to help the Association. That was the kind of person Nanao was. Loyal to the end, even if she didn't like it.

He sat down on the couch in the office and lounged back with glee. He couldn't wait to get his hands on this calendar. Scratch that, he couldn't wait to get his eyes on the calendar. With a sigh he got up again. He had to go to Ukitake and tell him the news. His eyes glinted and with a dramatic flourish of his ever pink haori he left the room.

oooxooo

Shunsui was in trouble. Massive trouble. This was ridiculous, even for him, he had to admit grudgingly. Ever since he had learned about this …this blasted calendar, he was fantasising and dreaming about Nanao in it. He imagined Nanao in poses she would definitely kill him for, if not worse, if she ever got wind of his imagination. She would get out her trusty book or fan and would beat him senseless, he had no doubts.

Well, he knew that Nanao was a special kind of woman but now he was scrutinizing every single movement, every single breath of hers. It was ridiculous. He couldn't concentrate on anything! Not that there was much to concentrate on except his luscious Nanao-chan but still. And when he had tried to drink himself into a stupor to get his mind off of her, in his drunken haze he had come up with even more vivid images of his Nanao-chan. There simply was no escape.

He had nearly gone so far as to try to get to the calendars before their release date but had swiftly reconsidered after having heard about this nasty spell Retsu had put up as sealing. That woman was scary.

Soon, he thought. Soon he'd be able to see the picture of Nanao. Then this would be over. Soon, he promised himself again. Very soon. Thank the gods.

oooxooo

The Association had decided to wait for the release date of the calendar until the end of November to generate as much excitement as possible among the Shinigami, which it indeed did. Even before seeing one single picture, the calendar was already legendary, and not only because of all the rumours surrounding the contents of this calendar but because women were actually buying the calendar too. They wanted to see the high ranking women of the Gotei13 as they had never seen them before.

It was beautiful.

It was decidedly exciting.

It was already sold out and second and third issues had to be printed before the official sale date was even there because there were so many pre-orders.

Yachiru saw the money signs and their project being in full swing with just the pre-orders. Nanao was deeply embarrassed and was still scared shitless about the release, to put it bluntly. Not because thousands (yes you heard right) of Shinigami, male and female, would see her in a quite different light than they usually did, but because one man would see it. One man she desperately wished she could erase from her mind. One man, who was called Kyoraku Shunsui.

oooxooo

The release day came around faster than Nanao had anticipated. And the looks her taicho had shot her recently had decidedly heated up. Maybe it was just her imagination but he looked at her as if he was imagining her in the naughtiest positions, naked, doing naughty things. Which made Nanao quite nervous, to be honest. She wanted to whack him for the looks he was shooting her, but she couldn't rightly beat him for how he looked at her, could she?

She knew that nobody who had no business with the calendar had seen it. As soon as it was printed it was put into a heavily sealed room, which Unohana-taicho had personally sealed with kido and an abundance of other things Nanao couldn't even contemplate and could not be broken by anybody except a taicho and even then it was doubtful since Unohana had put a nasty spell in it, at least that was rumoured, Nanao smirked. Yes, if you threaten with the loss of manhood, men would stay away. Nanao had no doubts that Unohana-taicho could actually do it. She was gifted.

Nanao took off the weekend of the release to let the excitement of The Unveiling as everybody called it, pass her by. She withdrew to her quarters, and a few books and some nice teas kept her company to pass the time. It was the first time in longer than Nanao could remember that she had not even left her rooms for a whole weekend. And it nearly managed to get her mind off the coming week. Nearly.

When she came into the office on Monday, it was to find the office quiet which was not surprising. She was usually the first one there. What was unusual was that the door to her office was difficult to open. She frowned and put a bit more force into it and it budged just to find dozens of stacks of calendars heaped around the room.

And her taicho was behind his desk.

Wait, wait, wait. Her taicho. Behind his desk. In the morning?

The apocalypse was coming.

Nanao frowned at him and could definitely feel a sort of depressed aura around him, even from across the room. This was strange. This was worrying. Her taicho only sometimes got sad and depressed like this and it was to remember all those wars which he would erase swiftly with a drunken night out to get his mind off it. But this was different she could feel it.

She knew he was awake. His head was buried in his hands. Moaning slightly. This was bad.

"Taicho?" She whispered softly. She didn't want to scare him.

And he reacted like she had whip lashed him. And he looked up with blood shot eyes. Had he been awake through the night? Nanao couldn't detect any sake bottles among the stacks of calendars and by the looks of it he seemed to be completely sober.

"Nanao." He whispered as if in pain.

"Nanao. I was stupid. I was unbelievably stupid." He started. "I was so looking forward to this calendar. Like a little boy. Looking forward to see my most beautiful Nanao in it. And I knew you would be in it. You're among the most beautiful women Sereitei has to offer." He trailed off but Nanao didn't want to say anything, couldn't for that matter. She wanted to protest the beautiful remark but he had said it so casually, as if it was a proven fact that she actually forgot to protest.

"And then the day came. I was among first in line to get my pre-ordered copy, of course. And then I held it in my hands and opened it, slowly. Pulling out the tension as long as I could. Slowly, leafing through the quite nice pictures. I didn't have long to wait until the one came I was waiting for. My most beautiful Nanao-chan. I looked at you and then…it was horrible Nanao. Horrible." He looked up at her and looked into her eyes. "I realized that not only I would be able to look at it but so would the whole male population of Sereitei. And I wanted to rip out every single man's eyeball who dared to look at your picture. Painfully, slowly."

He stopped and hung his head and let it rest on his hands, which were folded in front of him.

Nanao looked at him and didn't know what to say. This had not been the reaction she had been expecting. Some gloating, some smirks, yes. But utter misery? Definitely, no.

She knew that when her taicho got violent tendencies or spoke about them, it was serious. He was a peace loving man who would never wish pain on even an enemy.

"And the calendars?" Nanao asked slowly, pointing at the calendars, letting her eyes glide around the room, packed with stacks of calendars.

"That was me being stupid. I thought if I bought all of them nobody would be able to see you but do you know how many of them there are? I swear there are millions!" He said dejectedly.

Nanao knew that this was serious. Her taicho was depressed and…sad. So unbelievably sad. Nanao couldn't handle a sad Shunsui. Of course she couldn't handle a normal one either. But sad just broke her heart. So she made a decision.

She pulled her chair from behind her desk and pulled it in front of her taicho's desk, sitting right across from him now, stiffly. She took a breath and said it. Why she knew it would help she didn't know, but she did it anyways.

"I was wearing underwear."

Shunsui looked up at her sharply, a question in his eyes.

"The picture is supposed to imply that I'm naked, but I'm not. I didn't want to be. Some others were wearing nothing but I was wearing underwear." So, she had said it.

Shunsui looked from her face down to the calendar on his desk, opened surprise, surprise on her month. She didn't know why but it made her blush to see him looking at her in the picture, while she was sitting across from him. She tried to imagine what he would see when he looked upon the photo.

It was quite a nice picture actually, Nanao had to admit. It was her in an office type setting. A room in early morning light. A window behind her showed Sakura trees in full bloom as an allusion to the month May which she depicted. She was sitting on the edge of a desk, her gracefully arched legs dangling along the side of it. She was sitting on the desk full frontal but a quite big, old looking book was placed on her lap, hiding everything important from view. She had her arms leaning on the top of the big book and looked through her glasses…quite sensuously, she had to admit, out from the picture.

Her hair, despite her protests, was down around her face, stroking the tops of her shoulders and caressing her cheeks. Softly. Nanao knew that with her hair falling into her face, she looked softer, hence why she had it up all the time. The book in itself was a pun, since it was a goof from Matsumoto. The title said "The Secrets of Eight". Nanao, admittedly had found it hilarious. Seeing as she was keeping everything important from view and…well, secret behind the book and all, but had just sighed when Rangiku had presented it to her.

"So." Shunsui cleared his throat. "You're actually wearing underwear here?" He asked doubtfully. The hurt still there in his gaze.

Nanao decided to go on, bravely. Maybe stupidly, but bravely.

"The underwear was…small, but there, I assure you. I think you, above all, should know me and know that I would not lie about this, sir." She said stiffly.

Shunsui contemplated the picture and then looked up at her. His gaze spearing deeply into hers.

"You were wearing underwear." He said as if to himself. But Nanao nodded anyways.

He took a truly deep breath, where Nanao could see his powerful chest expanding while having his eyes closed and let it out in a rattle.

"You were wearing underwear, so even if these bastards try to picture you naked, you are still wearing underwear." He said deeply, with his eyes still closed.

Nanao knew it was completely illogical, but it had helped her cope with the picture and somehow had known that it would help her taicho too, now.

With an abrupt move she stood and took her chair back to her desk where she sat down and commenced with the daily workload. She was behind as it was.

She didn't hear Shunsui move, didn't even feel him move but he was just standing next to her, leaning down and placing the softest and most tender of kisses on her cheek, before Nanao could even blink.

"Thank you, Nanao." He whispered softly in his deep and rumbling voice directly into her ear. She desperately tried to suppress the shiver but thought she was not accomplishing it nearly well enough. His scent was slowly curling around her, his whole being nearly overwhelming hers.

And with that he went to the door, saying softly over his shoulder, "I have to get some sleep now", and opened the door to step through it.

The door closed softly behind him.

Only now did Nanao dare to lift a hand to press her fingers to the direct spot where he had laid his soft lips. Nanao closed her eyes and held the moment close to her.

"Thank you, taicho." She whispered into the silence.

Alright, so that's it. I hope you enjoyed yourself. First time writing fanfiction in a while. Let me know what you thought of it. Thanks.