Panting, Santa dropped his gun to the floor, falling to his knees. "There," he said, breath ragged, clothes bloody and torn. "The last one...dead."

"Wow! That was---that was some great crab-killing, Santa," Butters said, peeking his head out from his hiding place and racking his knuckles together.

"Oh, but look at this place!" Sheila cried, spreading her hands to encompass the room full of overturned furniture, torn decorations and dead bodies everywhere.

"HOWWWWDY-HO!"

Mr. Hankey flew through the air and landed on the mantelpiece, gloved hands on his hips.

"Mr. Hankey! You and Autumn stopped fighting?" Kyle asked.

"We sure did." He shielded his mouth for a second. "There are still a few more of Chef's Chocolate Salty Balls, right?"

"Uh, yeah."

"Okay, then, no problem!" He beamed. "Well, this place sure is a mess! We need to get it fixed up!"

And with a loud "WHEEEE!," he hopped off the mantle and began to swirl around the room in a gigantic brown whirlwind. The front door opened, and all the trash and dead bodies flew into the air and were swept magically away. A moment later Mr. Hankey was back in place, with the walls slightly shit-smeared but the room otherwise clean.

"There! Now this place sure is starting to look Christmassy!"

"Oh, thank you, Mr. Hankey!" Sheila said.

"Your welcome, ma'am. And I'd just like to thank all the people who've been takin' the time to read this story. I hope you all enjoyed, and that you have a happy Boxing Day!"

"Boxing Day?" Kyle said, raising an eyebrow. "But the last chapter of this story is being updated on Christmas."

"Well, yeah, but gee-golly-gosh, Kyle, anybody who'd be reading fanfiction on Christmas would have to be a real geek."

"Yeah, that's true," Stan said. "Christmas is like, the one day you're not supposed to be wasting time on the computer or watching TV or anything. You should be spending time with your family or playing with your new presents or something."

"That's right, Stan!" Mr. Hankey smiled and turned back to the readers. Because the fourth wall is just totally gone at this point. "So anyway, y'all have yourselves some happy holidays, and thanks for reading!"

THE END

Well, I finished it. Updated daily. I did consider just ending this fic at some point, since I didn't seem to be getting a lot of interest, but I figured I'd keep at it as a challenge for myself, and anyway, it would have been lame for those who were reading and reviewing. But I won't be doing an update-daily fanfic anytime soon. Too much work for not enough payoff.

But complaining aside, really, Merry Christmas. I hope you all enjoyed. :-) Now get off of the computer and go spend quality time with family or something, dammit!