After yet another morning of putting up with his roommate's complaints and demands, the Third Child was nearing his wits' end. Since she was now giving him the 'silent treatment', her other mode, as they trudged to school, he had time to stew over her frequent foul moods. Finally, he just decided to ask . . . "What's the deal, Asuka? Why are you always on my case? What did I ever do to you?"

"Quit whining, Third. It drives me up a wall."

"Sorry."

Not surprisingly, Shinji's automatic apology caused her to clench her teeth and growl with quiet menace. He dropped back a couple of steps to give her some distance.

I'm getting tired of being her target of convenience. It seemed that he was singled out even more than everyone else Asuka chose to harass. I probably won't get anything out of her, but if I could just find out why she's like that most of the time, maybe I can figure out how to get her to ease off.

It's possible he'd arrived at a certain level of apathetic fatalism or maybe it was his lack of skill at reading people, but he persisted. "Come on, Asuka, that's not an answer."

Asuka turned on her heel and stopped abruptly right in his path, giving him her 'Glare of Death'. It was all he could do to keep from running right into her. As it was, they ended up nearly nose to nose.

"You lack a spine, you whine any time things aren't just peachy for you, and you ask stupid questions! . . . Oh, and you keep saying 'sorry' as if it's a conditioned response!"

Without waiting for an answer, she pivoted and resumed her march toward school, arms held stiff at her sides, fists clenched and white-knuckled.

Funny, the small incidental things some people notice during a near-death experience. Those eyes . . . intense, complex . . . not just blue, but all sorts of blue. He lacked the vocabulary of a poet, otherwise he might have added '. . . from dark and deep as a summer's night sky to pale as a cool morning's mist . . . clear and sparkling and . . . dangerous. The feeling was there at any rate.

It was a minute or two before the effects wore off enough that Shinji rejoined the land of the living and realized he'd be late if he didn't pick up the pace.

~-~-~

The Class Rep had a philosophy that could be expressed as "Early is on-time, on-time is late, and late will get you clean-up duty after school." So Shinji's hurried arrival just before the first bell earned him his second glare of the day, but spared him a session with the broom and mop-bucket.

A moment later Horaki-inchou barked "Stand!" as she noticed the approach of the Sensei. The usual morning chatter among the students cut off abruptly and they stood next to their desks, such was her command presence.

"Bow!"

The Sensei moved from the doorway to his desk, the visible respect of his students giving him little satisfaction. The coffee maker in the teacher's lunch room was broken, denying him his usual dose of morning elixir. He nodded to Class Rep and she completed the familiar little ritual. "Sit!"

The students' rumps hit their seats as one.

Hikari Horaki allowed herself a private grin. -That's- the way I like it!

The remainder of the school day for Shinji was a mix of half-hearted attention to studies and between-lessons pondering of the difficulties of dealing with Asuka.

~-~-~

"I'm home."

"Welcome home, Shinji-kun. Where's Asuka?"

"She said to remind you she was going over to Hikari's house after school to study, Misato."

"Oh, yeah." Misato waved her free hand in casual dismissal of the subject and idly watched him quietly get out his books and begin his homework.

It wasn't a matter that he bothered to remark on anymore, but the can-count told him that she was into her third after-work beer. That probably meant that her afternoon entertainment was about to get underway . . . the teasing of one Shinji Ikari. 'Yep, she has that smirk. I'm doomed.'

"Shinji-kun, when are you going to bring home some of your girlfriends so I can start meeting them?" The sing-song tone she used made him cringe a little.

His monotone response, "There aren't any, Misato." and uninterrupted note scribbling didn't deter her in the least.

"Oh, come now. Do you mean to tell me you've never answered even one of the love confessions your female classmates stuff into your locker every day? You shouldn't play so hard to get." She was gratified to see the increasing redness of the boy's ears.

More scribbling and a long-suffering sigh from Shinji. He didn't look up.

"Such a boring boy."

"Sorry."

Misato regarded him as she finished the last few swallows and set the can next to its brothers.

Her tone lost some of its teasing quality. "You're more mopey than usual, I think. What's the problem? Asuka get tired of waiting for you to pay her some attention? She find herself another boyfriend?"

He put down his pencil and slowly looked up to meet his guardian's amused gaze. Surprisingly enough he thought he saw a little care and compassion in there. "No idea. She doesn't keep me up to date on her love life." He paused. "I have no idea what girls want, but as Asuka would be quick to point out, it's not me. Do you have any other embarrassing questions you'd like to ask?"

"OK, give. What's got your boxers in a bunch?"

It amazed him that Misato could just shake off three beers and appear sober at a moment's notice. He shrugged and decided he hadn't any more dignity to loose anyway.

"Girlfriends are not the problem. I repeat . . . I don't have any and don't expect to anytime soon."

Misato gave him her patented one-thousand watt smile. "Well, -that's- your problem then. You need to get out more and have fun. A nice girlfriend would help with that, you know."

"Are you finished, or don't you want to hear what I have to say?" He tried to give her the 'Ikari Glare', but fell short probably due partly to his youth and partly to the fact that he was somewhat lacking in the ice cold soulless bastard department as well.

She made the 'zipping my lips' gesture and tried to look attentive.

"It's just that Asuka's always acting like my existence offends her, or that I should have thought to offer whatever it is she's demanding at the moment. Of course I'm 'just a stupid little boy so it's all understandable'. You've heard her. I can put up with a lot; I had plenty of practice before I came to Tokyo 3. But she just never lets up and it's wearing on me. I thought if I knew what made her that way, I might stand a chance at knowing what to do or what not to do. You knew her before she came here, didn't you? Is there any way you can help me?"

His dejected and near hopeless expression was so melodramatic that Misato almost giggled. But realizing that it would only make him feel worse, she suppressed the impulse and decided to do what she could in the advice department.

"Shinji, I can't tell you everything I know about her. That's because some of what I do know is personal information . . . private. When and if she wants you to know, she'll tell you. But mostly, I think I need to try to get you to understand a few things.

"First, despite what you may think, you have a fairly thin skin and you take her hazing more seriously than you should. She likes to get a rise out of people just to keep from being bored. She can get you wound up so easily that you're not enough of a challenge to her." She held up her hand to forestall the expected denial. "I see you looking like a whipped puppy when she goes after you. Then you do the next thing wrong. You act like you accept responsibility for upsetting her and you do that 'sorry' routine. You have -got- to change that habitual behavior. It just pisses her off and she gets worse. Sound familiar?"

He nodded unenthusiastically. "OK, then what -should- I do in that case?"

"There's no one answer for that. It can vary from situation to situation. I guess the first thing you should do is not react to her right away. If she's angry, take a few seconds to figure out if you actually did anything to deserve her anger. If you can't come up with something concrete, something non-trivial, don't apologize, but you can ask what's bothering her. If you did do something that really is your fault, don't just mumble 'sorry' and hang your head. Give her a real apology that makes it clear that you know what you did wrong. The apology should fit the offense. Don't over apologize. Am I making sense here?"

"Sort of. I think I understand. Anything else?"

"Have you ever heard the term 'army brat'? It kind of describes Asuka. She's been in training to pilot Eva for almost ten years. Even though allowance was made at first for her being a little kid, it was all -military- training. While I was with her in Germany a few years ago, she'd just finished the same basic training that special forces soldiers get and was into her third week of CQC."

Shinji looked blank, so Misato explained. "CQC is Close Quarters Combat. She was taught martial arts . . . Western and Eastern styles, including knife fighting. Even though she -is- a fourteen year old kid, she has been trained to be a toughened combat soldier. She really never learned to be a kid. She's had a drill sergeant yelling in her face and was not allowed to flinch or act afraid. She was trained to present a hard, impassive exterior."

"But that's not how she's acting. She yells in -my- face and orders me around.
. . . . Oh, I think I'm getting it. She's being the drill instructor!"

Misato's grin was back in place. "Uh-huh. And that kind of makes -you- what, from her perspective?"

" . . . A trainee soldier? A recruit?"

"Yep. That's how it looks to me. So with that in mind, can you work out what you need to do?

"I'm not sure. I've never had military training like that. Just the Eva simulations."

Misato started rubbing her forehead. "Uh, look. Let's make this simpler. You should start off concentrating on the first things we talked about. Ditch the automatic 'sorry', and don't apologize unless you know you really need to, then do it right. Just work on those things for starters. It might take a little time to see results, but isn't it worth the effort?"

"I sure hope so. Thanks, Misato."

His guardian got a predatory grin on her face and said, "Now how about those girlfriends?"

Shinji got a hunted look on his face. "I think I need to get back to my homework. Maybe I'll do it in my room." So saying, he stuffed his books and notepaper back into his backpack and beat a hasty retreat to his refuge.

"You're no fun!" Misato called after him.

~-~-~