Fickle

I miss the words, I love the words you did not say
I missed the kiss you never, never gave away

—

Josh Hotz likes waking up in late afternoon and ice-cream and late-night swims and summer.

"My birthday's next week," Claire giggles, throwing her arms out to catch the summer air, her legs swinging in the breeze that separates her from the ground. "And I demanded chocolate-raspberry pound cake." She licks her unglossed lips and sounds so excited, he smiles, because Claire's the only one who manages to look so cute in a sundress and mismatched Keds and messy uncombed hair.

He throws aside his jacket and climbs up the tree after her, and doesn't hesitate to place a shy kiss on her cheek.

Josh Hotz likes hot chocolate and snow and Timbaland boots and winter.

"It's cold." The devilish smile spreads across her lips and reaches her amber eyes. "I need body heat."

And Josh happily tries to make her happy by wrapping his arms around her torso, and giving her much more than a hug.

—

Josh Hotz is kind.

"I'm sorry." He hands her the CD, avoiding her eyes. "Cam made you a mix."

He watches as water trickles down from the clouds in Claire's eyes as she reads the playlist, and he feels anger, because who the hell breaks up with someone using a damned song?

And Josh Hotz is disingenuous.

But then he forces his anger to subside and tries to feel shame as he whispers, 'I'm here for you', because who the hell does what he does?

—

Josh Hotz is generous.

"I'll give you half my muffin if you give me a kiss." He winks and holds out the banana-nut muffin under her nose almost seductively, letting the warm, rich smell waft up her nose before pulling away.

"Josh!" Massie draws out, whining playfully, because he knows how much she loves being cute instead of sophisticated, for once.

But it all stops when a familiar dark-haired boy appeared in the playground, eyes searching, mouth smiling when he sees Massie, who immediately stops writhing in Josh's arms and scrambles to stand a mile away. "See you later, J," she murmurs before traipsing across the sandbox in her Marc Jacob wedges, hair swinging behind her,

and Josh Hotz finds out he is selfish.

He stuffs the muffin whole in his mouth and narrows his eyes.

—

Josh Hotz is supportive.

He runs and runs as fast as he can, eyes on the Cam and the soccer ball and nothing else, yelling words of encouragement as he waits for Cam to pass it to him. "Cam!" he yells, slowing down a tad bit, but Cam ignores him and shoots for the goal—

And Josh Hotz is obstructive.

Josh grinds his cleats into the wet grass as Derrington whoops and Kemp hollers and Chris punches the air and motions for everyone to carry Cam on their shoulders. Gritting his teeth, Josh accidentally steps on Kemp's shoelace and they all come tumbling down, falling in a heap on top of Cam.

—

Josh Hotz is vigorous.

Massie's flip flops crash against the waves as she lets out a tinkling laugh, and Josh tries to catch her laughter. They're running in circles; him trying to grab her and her running away, and finally she stops laughing and stumbles into the salt water, bringing Josh with her. Her giggles subside to chuckles and her chuckles turn to the smallest of smiles as she leans in, closer and closer and closer.

Massie Block tastes like Cinnabon and salt water and fire.

But Josh Hotz is tired.

"Are you okay?" Claire's wide blue eyes fill with concern as Josh closes the door heavily behind him. His hair is in a mess and his clothes are suspiciously damp, but he wears a smile for her and she returns it.

"Is it alright if we stay inside for today?" Josh asks, flinging himself onto Claire's bed, automatically reaching for her old rag doll and tossing it to her. She catches it, the smile still etched on her lips.

"Of course."

"Thanks, Claire." And her response is to plant a sweet little kiss on his lips before turning away to busy herself with straightening her desk, blushing furiously.

Claire Lyons tastes like gummies and sugar and ice.

—

Josh Hotz wants more.

His hands roam down the length of Massie's fire-red minidress, toying her with tickles and teasing her with kisses.

And Josh Hotz still wants more,

Because Claire pulls away and her ice-blue skirt twirls and puffs around her, and it almost kills him when she turns shyly away from his kiss.

And Josh Hotz is fickle.

Massie beams, her eyes twinkling like stars;

Claire giggles, her breath a magnificent scent of original-flavored Bubblicious;

Massie smirks, her glossy lips mocking his own;

Claire flutters her eyelids shut, waiting for her fairytale moment;

Massie's lips part in disbelief and she backs away;

Claire's hands race to cover her flooding eyes;

Massie is silent and turns to walk away, her minidress still teasing him as always;

Claire stifles a sob and rushes out of the room;

And Josh is left with empty hands and plastic smiles.

fin

—

Again, this is for Amy and Maya and Madderlo,

because Madderlo begged me for Closh and Maya is obsessed with Mosh and Amy's "Hide & Seek" inspired me.

HAPPY EARLY CHRISTMAS!

(And don't forget, I don't own the Clique, 'Oceans Away' by the Fray, OR Bubblicious, m'kay?)

Loves, HV