Fearless
by Damien J. Frost

Disclaimer: Hannah Montana, and all items associated with, are property of Michael Poryes, Richard Correll, Barry O'Brien, It's a Laugh Productions, Disney, et al. There is no profit being gained from the content of this story and it is to be used solely for private entertainment purposes. The plot is the intellectual property of the writer. No parts of this story are to be duplicated or posted elsewhere without the expressed permission of the author.

This story is rated "T" or "PG-13" by the guidelines of the fansite on which it is posted.

--

I sometimes wonder what my life would be like if I'd never met Miley. Honestly, I can't imagine it. Oliver is my oldest friend, but really, when it comes down to it, no one knows me better than Miley.

We've always just clicked. Everything about us just fit together, even though our interests were usually polar opposites. I mean, who'd have thought that a skater chick would become best friends with a super-mega popstar?

Not me.

Well, okay, I dreamed of it a little. A lot. Okay, fine! Every frickin' night! You happy?

But seriously considered it happening? Nuh-uh. No way.

Here I am, though, sitting in Miley's room as she rifles through the closet of her alter-ego. Graduation is a week away, and after that, the last summer we'll have of freedom. Together.

Together freedom. Whatever.

I'm going to NYU for business and she's off to Berkley to study music. What fun.

I hate college.

Well, I'll probably hate college.

You know what I mean.

There's something I know I've got to do before we leave, though. Something I've got to tell her. But, I'm not really sure how. I shouldn't have kept it from her for this long, I know, but how do you tell your best friend a life-shattering secret? How do I tell her something that will cause her to push me out of her life forever if she can't accept it?

I don't think anything makes me more afraid than the thought of my life without Miley in it.

Deep breath.

One more.

One more.

One…

Fine! No more stalling.

"Miley?"

Oh God, could I sound any more pathetic? But, she hears me and pokes her head out of the closet, smiling brilliantly at me.

"What's up?"

I look down at my hands and watch them intently as I scratch one thumb with the other.

"I umm…"

Come on girl! Show some nerve!

"I've got a date on Friday."

She's silent for a moment before she squeals in excitement and pounces on the bed next to me.

"And you're just telling me now? Who? How? Where? Details, woman."

I grin at her enthusiasm and force my head to turn and stare her blinding smile in the eye.

"Um, well I got asked out Monday just before lunch. We're going to the Hannah Montana concert."

Miley's laughter fills the room. But I can't smile, because I know what she's going to ask next.

"Oh my God, Lilly. What guy would have tickets to one of my concerts? Or even suggest that as a date option?"

I stare resolutely at my hands. I can't help it. I try opening my mouth, but the muscles in my jaw won't move. It takes a moment before Miley notices the shift in my mood. She shifts closer, and I flinch. It doesn't go unnoticed.

"Lilly, what's wrong?"

I shake my head. Crap. I can feel tears. Don't cry. No cryi… Shit. I'm crying.

"Oh my God, what's wrong?"

Miley gets down on her knees in front of me and takes my hands. I know she's trying to look into my eyes, but I keep avoiding hers.

"Lilly, tell me what's wrong!"

I take a deep, shuddering breath.

"Sarah."

Miley rocks back on her heels. I still can't look at her face. She hates me. I know she does.

"What did Sarah do?"

She's angry. Great. Not only am I completely screwing this up, now I've gotten Sarah in trouble. I scrub at my eyes with the heel of my hand.

"No, not… she didn't do anything. Well, she did. Fuck! Why is this so hard?"

Miley's sitting on the bed next to me again, only this time she has me wrapped in her arms and she's rocking me back and forth.

"Just calm down, take a few breaths, and tell me when you're ready."

I shake my head and separate myself from her. I stand and walk away. I can't have her near me right now.

"No. I can't tell you when I'm ready, because I'll never be ready. I don't want you to hate me, Miley. I can't have you hate me."

She stands and moves close to me, completely defeating the purpose of me getting away from her.

"I won't hate you Lilly. Just tell me what's going on!"

I take a deep breath.

"I'm going to the concert with Sarah."

There. I said it.

"I thought you were going on a date?"

I nod.

"But you're going to the concert with Sarah?"

Okay, this is getting stupid. I nod again.

"So, is Sarah going with you guys? Like a double date thing?"

I sigh and roll my eyes. Of course it wouldn't be easy.

"No. Not like a double date. It's just going to be me and Sarah."

I look at her expectantly. Oh, please. She still doesn't get it.

"So, no date?"

I hold my face in my hands and resist the urge to laugh.

"Yes. I am going on a date. We are going to your concert."

She shakes her head.

"But you just said you're going with Sarah."

I hold out my hands like a cheap magician at the 'ta-da' part of a trick. It takes her another second.

"Oh. What?"

Okay, well I guess it's good that her first reaction isn't disgust. Surprise works for me. I can deal with surprise.

"I'm going on a date with Sarah. She asked me out, and I said yes."

Miley stumbles back and sits roughly on her bed. She looks like a lost puppy. Or a dizzy one.

"So are you… Is this like… Why?"

I throw up my arms in defeat.

"What do you mean, why?"

She cocks her head to the side. Great. From surprised to curious in three seconds flat. This is so not what I was prepared for. Although, really, why am I surprised? This is Miley.

"Why did you say yes?"

I can't help the sigh of exasperation as I collapse onto the bed next to her.

"Because… Sarah's always been nice, you know? And, well… she's cute."

I resolutely stare at the ceiling. I know Miley's staring at me like I've got a horn sprouting from my left eye.

"You think she's cute? Like how?"

I sigh again. Sometimes I think Miley is intentionally dense. I know she's not. That's just my frustration talking. But sometimes she just… ugh.

"Like… like I kind of wouldn't mind kissing her kind of cute. You know? Holding hands and cuddling at the movies kind of cute."

I hear a thud and turn to see Miley's flopped down on the bed next to me. Now it's her turn to stare a hole in the ceiling.

"So are you… you know?"

I grin. Her reluctance to put the word to it is kind of amusing.

"Say it."

She purses her lips, but refuses to look at me.

"Come on, Stewart. Say it."

I roll on my side and prop my head in my hand. I poke her in the stomach. She relents with a squealing laugh as she darts out of the way of my questing finger.

"Okay, fine! Are you…"

She falters as she moves to a sitting position, legs crossed Indian-style so she can face me.

"Are you gay?"

I nod timidly. I'm still waiting for the disgust and the outrage, but instead, there's still that damnable curiosity.

"How do you know? How long have you known?"

I lie back down and put my arms behind my head. This won't take long, but I can't really look at her when I tell her this. I never really thought I'd get this far, honestly. I thought I'd have been thrown out ten minutes ago.

"I don't know. I mean, how do you know you like guys? You just do, right? It's not like it was a conscious decision. I've always kind of known I liked girls. Before I even met you, really. I just never reached the stage where boys went from 'Oh, gross,' to 'Oh, yeah.'"

She shifts a little, breaking the concentration I've had on the ceiling. She's scooted closer to me. I gulp slightly and return my attention upwards. Please don't let her hit me. She hits like a girl, but still.

"But, I think I really realized what was going on with me back in Freshman year. You remember when we watched But I'm a Cheerleader! thinking it was about something else? Something just clicked in my head. Like 'Oh, so that's what's going on.'"

I hear her take a deep breath, so I turn. She looks a little mad now. Great. Here it comes. She wants me out of her room, out of her life, out of –

"How could you not have told me for four years!"

Okay. So not what I was expecting.

"Um, sorry?"

She has her arms crossed and is staring at me. Well, glaring. I might have a hole between my eyes in a second.

Okay, this is starting to get creepy. She hasn't even blinked in the last minute and a half. And I'm not quite sure if I'm allowed to say anything.

She finally huffs in annoyance and looks away.

"You're in so much trouble."

I start laughing. I can't help it. I've pictured how this conversation was going to go more times than I can count, and this was never one of the scenarios. I don't know why I'm surprised though. Miley is so… so… Miley. Okay, I know that was lame, but I really don't know how else to describe her.

As my giggles subside, I see her glaring at me again, only now she has a slight smile.

"You done?"

I nod weakly.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

I shrug and sit up, crossing my legs and mimicking her posture.

"You've never really told me how you feel about gay people, you know? And it's not exactly an easy subject to bring up."

Miley nods, and then completely surprises me. She pulls me into a very tight hug. She's smiling brightly when she releases me.

"So Sarah, huh? How'd that happen?"

I laugh again.

"You remember Monday, when I was late for lunch?"

Miley nods, her grin remaining firmly in place.

--

"Hey Lilly, can I talk to you?"

I turn around and spot Sarah. Surprised, I nod.

"Yeah, no problem. I'll catch up with you in a minute, Ollie."

The dork-in-plain-sight grins and gives me a thumbs up as he continues onto the lunchroom. I turn to the eco-friendly girl and smile.

"What can I do ya for?"

She grins timidly at my imitation of Miley's accent.

"Um, well, I was wondering if you… um… you know, wanted to… You don't have to of course, but, if you wanted to, that'd be great. Um, well, do you… want to go to the Hannah concert? With me?"

I open my mouth to tell her sorry, I've already got tickets. I mean, come on. Lola's gotta be there, right? But she adds one more sentence that catches me completely off-guard.

"As a date?"

I'm floored. Completely. I'm picking linoleum out of my teeth, I'm so floored. I must look like I'm going to say no, or something, because she's already backpedaling.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have even… Please don't tell anyone, I just… I thought, you know, you're never going out with any guys and…"

She stops talking as I put my hand over her mouth. I grin.

"I didn't say no."

I pull my hand away, revealing her grin.

"You didn't say yes, either."

I shrug. Details, details.

"Well, as the askee, I think I have a right to a few answers, first."

She purses her lips and raises an eyebrow, but doesn't say anything.

"What time are you planning on picking me up?"

Sarah's smile makes me blush. She's so blatantly happy it's almost embarrassing.

--

Miley squeals happily and hugs me again. This is so weird. Even if she didn't hate me, I didn't think she'd be comfortable showing me any physical affection. Or, you know, want to touch me with a twelve-foot pole.

She separates herself from me and claps gleefully.

"Oh my God, that is so cute!"

She gets still suddenly and her eyes go wide. She's got an idea. One that she thinks is brilliant. I am now thoroughly frightened.

"Do you guys want backstage passes?"

I laugh and shake my head. Oh thank God. It's nothing major.

"Thanks, but no. I just kind of want to enjoy my date. No offense."

She's already waving me off.

"Don't worry about it. I understand. You have to tell me everything, though!"

I grin and nod. After a moment of silence, I get a little more serious.

"So, you're really okay with this?"

She smiles softly.

"Yeah, Lils. Who you like is your business. The only thing I care is that you're happy."

I launch myself at her and hug her tightly. This girl is amazing.

"You're amazing."

She laughs and I can feel her shaking her head.

"I'm a rock star. Amazing is an everyday thing. Now normal and unamazing? That I could go for."

I laugh and push her off the bed. As she lunges at me from the floor, I can't help but think that I'm really lucky.

I have someone who'll be behind me no matter what I do or what I choose. I'm not afraid anymore, because I know she'll always be there.

Having someone like that will make anyone fearless.